by Octavia Kore
They worked together, finding a rhythm as Esme moved to his upper shaft, taking him in unison as he bucked his hips.
“Gleck!” Xuvri breathed, his head rising to watch them. He pressed down on Ky’s head a moment before Esme felt his fingers in the loose strands of her hair. She didn’t resist, didn’t balk at the pressure he applied, and when he groaned, she smiled around his girth.
The upper shaft might be smaller, but it wasn’t by much. Without the curve in it, Esme could take this one farther, but when she reached the base, her nose pressed into his plates and she gagged. Tears gathered in the corners of her eyes, and he immediately released her, but snatched his hand back and did it again, letting the muscles in her throat massage the vibrating tip.
It was wonderful to know he was looking out for her. Esme wanted him to be in control, wanted him to guide her speed and her depth, and after a few moments, Xuvri seemed to take the hint. He pressed them both down over and over, his head falling back into the mattress as he began to thrust, but it didn’t last long.
His whole body trembled as he pulled them away, snarling when Ky tried to touch him. “On your back,” Xuvri growled, swatting their female’s ass when she didn’t move fast enough. When Ky was in position, Xuvri lifted Esme and settled her on top, moving her legs so that she straddled Ky’s hip. The vibrating petals of her female’s sex moved against her outer lips as she wriggled, but when Xuvri stepped behind them, wedging his hips between Ky’s open legs, Esme went still.
This was what she wanted, what she’d been waiting for. Something passed between her and Ky as the other female cupped her face. “I am here,” she whispered. “I have you, little human. Always.”
Esme watched the look of pleasure on Ky’s face as he slid into her, working his way in and out until his upper shaft teased Esme’s cunt. “Please, Xuvri.” The words came out soft and plaintive, but she thrust herself back against him, looking over her shoulder as she begged.
Their male stilled as she tried again to take him. “You’re sure?” he asked, his eyes searching her face.
“Yes. Please, Xuvri,” she whimpered.
“Tell him what you want,” Ky commanded. “Tell our male what you want him to do.”
Esme licked her lips, her arms shaking as they supported her weight on the bed. “I want you inside of me. I want you to fuck me.”
Xuvri growled as he pressed the tip of his upper shaft against her folds. “If you change your mind, if you wish to stop at any time, you’ve only to say the words, Esme.”
The concern for her, the understanding that she might need to stop the intimacy after they started, touched every part of her. It made her feel safe with them. Not only would Ky always be there to back her up when she needed it, but she could trust Xuvri to never push her further than she was prepared to go.
Ky reached between them, spreading Esme’s slick folds as she wrapped her tail around Xuvri, and drew him forward, guiding him into Esme’s body for the first time. Even though this was something she wanted, Esme’s mind immediately tried to work against her, but she reached behind her, feeling blindly for the scars she knew were on Xuvri’s sides. They were ones she’d given him during her lessons with the dagger. The scars were small, barely noticeable, but when her fingers brushed against them, Esme’s mind began to clear.
This was her male, one of her mates, and the father of her daughter. She was safe with him. All she had to do was ask and he would stop. There would be no guilt and no shame with him.
He gave Esme a moment to adjust to him before he began to move, his hips thrusting against her and Ky as he pushed them all closer to the edge of madness. Ky arched up, her lips crushing Esme’s as she whimpered.
Esme buried her fingers in Ky’s shorn hair, holding her female close as Xuvri pounded into them with a force that made their bodies shake. When Ky’s tail slid inside of her, matching Xuvri’s frantic pace, Esme pressed her face into Ky’s chest to keep from screaming. They were thicker than anything she’d ever taken in her life, and the way the tip of their female’s tail slid against the backside of her clit made the sensitive nub throb.
Had anything ever felt as good as both of them moving inside of her? A blissful haze blanketed her mind as their shared pleasure washed over her, ramping up her own to heights she’d never imagined possible.
An earthly, animalistic growl was the only warning Esme got before a set of claw fingers grasped her hips and Xuvri began to slam into them. Esme’s breasts brushed against Ky’s as they moved against one another. Her pussy fluttered around Xuvri’s cock as her release burst over her, but he wasn’t finished with her yet.
Esme wished she could see them from an outsider’s perspective, wished she could watch them as they moved together. The image that her mind conjured up was so beautiful, so erotic, that Esme felt the heat in her belly burst once more and she came, her back arching as she quivered uncontrollably, sending her pleasure, her love for her mates to them through their bond.
“Harder,” she whimpered, leaning down to draw one of Ky’s nipples into her mouth. It was as if something snapped into place at that moment, like a thread connecting the three of them going taut. She could feel them, in her mind and in her heart. It was all consuming, an overwhelming sensation that stole her breath away as Xuvri’s pace quickened.
Ky’s strangled cry filled her head a moment before waves of pleasure washed over her through the bond, sending Esme spiraling into another softer climax. Both females trembled when Xuvri surged into them one last time, and Esme swore she could feel his release spill into Ky’s body. Xuvri collapsed over them, his arms shaking as he fell to the side, pulling Esme onto the bed with him so that she was pressed between them on her side.
For the first time since leaving the Kaia’s ship, Esme’s mind was free of her attacker and all of the things she’d gone through. In this moment, there was nothing beyond her mates or the bed they shared.
“I love you,” she heard Xuvri say as he tugged Ky onto her side before pressing a kiss to the top of Esme’s head. “I love you both.”
Ky smiled as she trailed her fingers over the nearly healed blaster wound on Xuvri’s upper chest. “I love you as well, my tainted warrior. And you,” Ky said, wiping away the tear that spilled from Esme’s eye. “I love you too, little human.”
“I love you both more than I’ll ever be able to tell you.” Esme sniffled. “My grandpa always said there was a rainbow after every storm. The two of you and the family we’ve created… that’s my rainbow.”
Healing from trauma was a delicate process, one that was different for every single person. For Esme, building a family of her own was what started her journey toward healing. She was lucky to have two very patient alien mates who stuck by her side and who showed her that, even though others had done horrible things to her in the past, they weren’t all out to do the same thing.
Some rational part of her had known this all along, but trauma didn’t have a rational side. Trauma was a liar. It made you feel unsafe and told you that if one person couldn’t be trusted, then none of them could be. It was the cackling voice in her mind that whispered, “Sure, they’re nice now, but what if this is a front? This won’t last. They’ll wait for you to get comfortable, and then they’ll hurt you just like all of the others.”
It took a long time for Esme to understand that her trauma was holding her back, keeping her from finding love and peace within herself. She’d pushed others away, lashed out at them with cutting words as a way to protect herself from being used again.
If you never let anyone get too close to you, they can’t hurt you.
Esme had spent so much time trying to avoid pain, that she’d nearly forgotten what it was like to live. Surviving had left her dazed, confused, and hurting, but she had people who cared about her here on Venora, who were patient and loyal as she took on the long, often difficult, process of learning to heal after what she’d been through.
There were still times when she felt like she
didn’t deserve their forgiveness for the things she’d said and done, but she knew she was a different person now.
Esme looked up from her spot on the plush cushion positioned beneath the large icia tree in the garden, watching as Xuvri and Ky made their way toward her. Eina was lying on her sire’s chest, her hand clutching one of his xines as she tried her best to fit it into her mouth. Ky reached up, tugging it out of her hand and cooing softly as Eina began to fuss.
“Time for a nap,” her female whispered as they drew closer.
“Do you hear that, little warrior?” Xuvri asked their daughter. “It’s time for you to rest so you can learn how to be strong and fierce like your mama and your mitera. When you grow up, they will show you how to slay your own monsters.”
Love didn’t conquer all, didn’t erase her trauma or blot out the memories. Every day was still a fight, and Esme knew she would wake up each morning prepared to battle those demons. Love had given her a reason to live.
Epilogue
Xuvri
Six years later…
The waves washed over the sand, enveloping Xuvri’s feet and ankles as he stood on the shore. He gazed out at Earth’s ocean, watching as the sun sank slowly beyond horizon. The clouds here were painted yellow, orange, and pink, and they drifted aimlessly, going wherever the warm breeze took them. Birds of different kinds soared through air around them, their cries mingling with the roar of the waves.
They were the only ones on this stretch of beach, and Xuvri inhaled the warm salt air. After years of waiting, he was going to fulfill his promise today. He was bringing Laurie home.
“I’m ready, Daddy!”
Xuvri smiled at the human word his offspring used as he turned to watch Eina race toward him, her pretty golden hair flying behind her. There was nothing in the universe that compared to being a sire. He crouched down, and Eina launched herself into his chest, wrapping her arms around his neck as he stood.
“Is it time?” she asked, tugging at one of his xines.
“I think so.” He slipped the vial containing Laurie’s ashes from around his neck and broke the seal he’d placed on it so long ago. “Do you want to help me?” Xuvri asked.
Eina hesitated before nodding, her eyes on the vial as she reached out to place her hand over his. They checked the direction of the wind before tipping the vial and releasing the ashes, watching as the breeze took them.
“She’s all gone,” Eina whispered.
“No one is ever really gone as long as you keep them here,” Xuvri told her, tapping his clawed finger against her chest.
A smile spread across her face as she placed one hand over her heart while the other reached up to hold onto the tiny blown glass pendant that housed the remaining ashes. The blue and silver swirls reminded him of the ocean, which seemed fitting given Laurie’s love of it. Arrel, the female who had gifted them the sun and moons necklace that hung on the same chain, had created this one at Eina’s request.
“What are we doing now, Daddy?”
Xuvri turned away from the water and glanced back at his females where they stood farther up the beach. Irros tugged at Esme’s hand as he bounced in place, begging his mama to let him play in the sand for just a little while longer while Ky laughed beside them, cradling their newly born daughter, Osara, in her arms.
“We’re going home.” With his promise to Laurie finally fulfilled, Xuvri could go back to the village, to the home he shared with his family, knowing that he’d been able to honor the female who’d given him the most precious gift. Without her, Eina would have never been created, would have never called out to his mates and led them to him. Because of her, Xuvri had been given a second chance. Because of Laurie, Xuvri had his family.
Now, he had forever.
Author’s Note
Hello there!
It is hard to believe Amanda and I started writing together in October of 2019 and published our first book in February of 2020. Starting a career in the middle of a pandemic was surreal. I’m not sure I ever thought I would have the guts to share the stories I write with the world, and if not for my cousin I probably never would have.
This book was so very tough for me personally to write as it deals with the loss of a child, something I know all too well. In June of 2013, I lost my second child during pregnancy. That loss would change the rest of my life. Every hard thing I’d been through up until then (and I’d been through a lot) had been worth it because at least one day I would have children of my own whom I could be better for.
So, having the one thing I’d always looked forward to, the thing that had kept me going ripped from me… it was devastating. After losing my baby the father beat me because he blamed me for the loss. I kicked him out and stayed single after that for a year. Until I met the father of my two girls. He raised my oldest, and showed me that it was okay to have more children. It was okay to love again.
I understand Esme and Xuvri so well as I myself lashed out at others because of the trauma I had gone through. I was scared and terrified of being hurt again. Every single person was a threat, and honestly I still struggle with that. I probably always will. C-PTSD isn’t something that just goes away or one heals from. I wish I could say love will heal everything; it doesn’t. But it does make the process of healing and moving on worth it. The sting of losing a child, the trauma of my past will be something I will have to wake up every day and choose to live with. Esme, Xuvri, and I will live with it for the rest of our lives.
Xuvri was a villain in someone else’s story as most of us are. Even the best person can be someone else’s villain because none of us are perfect. In the face of his loss Xuvri lost himself in the madness that had been threatening him for years. Not only was he fighting the madness of the injections, but also the madness his gift came with. Being able to connect with people with your mind comes with a price. When left alone, it can drive a person mad. Not only was he dealing with the loss of many children but the guilt of not being able to protect Laurie and uphold his end of the deal. I love watching him struggle to be the good person his mates and children deserve while trying to find who he actually was. That is not to say his past deeds are not wrong, but that he has grown and learned from his mistakes. Xuvri will spend the rest of his life trying to be the man his family deserves.
Kythea was timid and sweet in Ecstasy from the Deep, but this was who she was forced to be, not who she was. We loved exploring what Ky was actually like and learning what hid behind the strong gaze of the female willing to break laws for her brother. Ky’d been broken just like her mates by the trauma of her past. But together each of these mates are whole. They help one another with their suffering and learn how to deal with triggers together.
I loved that Ky was the rock for Esme when it came to dealing with the trigger of sex. That Xuvri was willing to do what it takes and wait however long Esme needed even if that meant he would never be able to claim her. And Esme? I love how Esme grew protective of what they had and learned that by allowing her trauma to take control she was being unfair to her mates.
I hope other people who have been through some of these traumas and deal with C-PTSD understand what our characters went through. I find there aren’t very many novels who write these types of characters this way so I wanted to show the way I dealt with things. Maybe there is someone out there who also dealt with them the same, and maybe they will find a kindred soul in our characters.
Thank you so much for reading our book. We hope you enjoyed it and would love it if you left a review. They help our books get seen, and in a world with many other amazing authors, every last one counts. Each and every review means the world to us. We are constantly learning and growing and appreciate all of the advice and tips.
If you find a typo, feel free to reach out to us on Facebook or email at: [email protected]
Also by Octavia Kore
Venora Mates:
Ecstasy from the Deep (Short Story)
Ecstasy from the Deep (Extended Editi
on)
Kept from the Deep
Dauur Mates:
Queen Of Twilight
Seyton Mates:
Breaths of Desire (Short Story)
Breaths of Desire (Extended Edition)
WORKS COMING SOON BY OCTAVIA KORE
Venora Mates:
Enticed from the Deep
Kidnapped from the Deep
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About the Authors
Born in the Sunshine State, Hayley Benitez and Amanda Crawford are cousins who have come together to write under the name Octavia Kore. Both women share a love for reading, a passion for writing, and the inclination toward word vomiting when meeting new people. Ecstasy from the Deep (From the Depths anthology version) was their very first published work. Hayley and Amanda are both stay-at-home moms who squeeze in time to write when they aren’t being used as jungle gyms or snack dispensers. They are both inspired by their love for mythology, science fiction, and all things extraordinary. Amanda has an unhealthy obsession with house plants, and Hayley can often be found gaming in her downtime.
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