by Natalie Ann
Speed was building along with that pressure and a release was fast on the horizon. “Matt,” she said, her voice starting to rise as her body was bobbing up and down.
“Just let go,” he said. “I’ll follow.”
Again, he just knew. It was too scary to think about it so she didn’t. All she thought of was her body taking over. Taking control on a primitive level that she needed at the moment.
Matt’s hands went to her waist and held on as his hips slammed up harder into her, his teeth nipping a nipple and sending her up so high if he weren’t hanging on, she was sure she’d hit the ceiling and go through the roof and over the moon.
But she didn’t. She stayed right in bed with him, then allowed him to hold her tight to his chest after he’d shouted out her name.
He got his tenderness in and she didn’t mind at all.
Good for You
“You slept with him.”
Dena turned to look at Amber as she said that statement with her eyes wide while bouncing on her toes. “Do I have a sign on my head? What the hell?” she asked, wondering how Amber could have figured that out.
Amber laughed. “Yeah. It says this woman got boned hard.”
“Come on,” Dena said, laughing.
“Okay. Just that I heard you were out with him at the pizza joint and I put two and two together. You’ve got a nice relaxed look on your face.”
Before Dena could reply, Rene came rushing in, stopped fast, looked at her then said, “Did you get a piece of Matt’s ass Saturday night?”
Dena’s shoulders slumped. “Amber is rubbing off on you. Seriously, you two girls are impossible.”
“I think she jumped his bones,” Amber said. “Oh look, I’m right, her face is beet red.”
“Fine,” she said. “I jumped his bones on Saturday night. Then again on Sunday morning.” She wasn’t going to tell them how many times in between the night and morning. They didn’t need those kinds of details.
“Well,” Rene asked, “how was it?”
“It was good.” They both snorted at her. “Fine. It was different...great. Is that what you wanted to hear? That Matt and I had sex all night long and it was wonderful. Fabulous. Exciting.”
“That’s more than I needed to hear,” Max said from the doorway. “But good for you.”
Yeah, her face got even redder. How embarrassing. “Sorry about that, Max. I didn’t know you were here.”
“Don’t be sorry. It’s kind of nice to pick on you girls now and again since you’re always ganging up on me.”
“We’ll stop talking about our personal lives and get ready for work,” Dena said.
“No,” Amber said, hands on her hips. “We’ve got thirty minutes and there’s nothing to do. We all got here early because we wanted to talk to you about this.”
“Not me,” Max argued. “I had to drop Davy off earlier to school; otherwise I wouldn’t have been here yet.” He shook his head and turned to walk away, Dena thankful it was just the three girls again.
“So, back to what you were saying,” Rene said.
“I don’t want to go into details.”
“But we want you to,” Amber argued.
“Not happening. It was great though. Different than before, that’s for sure.”
“Like you’ve said so many times,” Rene said, “you’re different people now. It makes sense that it would be different. You’ve both had years of experience with other people.”
“True,” she said, not really wanting to think about that. There was a time in her life she’d thought Matt would have been her first and her last. She had to learn to get over that now.
“So you jumped him, you said?” Amber asked. “No tenderness for you.”
It really annoyed her how her friends knew her so well. “Yeah. I’m just not ready to go down that route. He’s always been so gentle. I wanted to ask him if he was like that with everyone, but decided I really didn’t want to know.”
“Maybe he’s that way with you because it means more,” Rene said. Rene had been a virgin when she met Cole. She’d understand that part of it.
“Could be. But it’s not the case now. I mean it was years ago, but not now.”
“And you spent the night,” Amber said.
“Yes. That was new for us. We’d never spent the night together before. I mean we were teens. We lived with our parents. We had sex when there was an empty house or in the car in the secluded woods now and again.”
“What is it with you people and having sex in cars around here?” Rene asked, wrinkling her nose.
“It’s the atmosphere,” Amber said. “Plus if you were having sex as a teen you probably would have too. Then again, Cole probably would have had a hard time fitting in the backseat of any car, but I bet he made it work a time or two.”
“I don’t want to hear about any other woman having sex with my husband,” Rene said, her bottom lip coming out in a pout.
“But he’s your husband now,” Dena said, not feeling as much jealousy as she thought she would with that statement.
“Mine for life,” Rene agreed. “So back to Saturday night. Is Matt a cuddlier?”
“He is. I’m not, but I didn’t mind. I just got the feeling that he didn’t want to let go. Or was afraid I’d walk out the door. Which is funny since he’s the one that walked out on me.”
“That’s it, isn’t it?” Amber asked. “You’re holding back because you don’t believe he’s going to stay here. You just want to have fun right now and not worry about your heart breaking.”
Again, no use arguing. “That’s part of it. The other part is it has only been a few weeks. He’s not a stranger by any means. We have a deep history and maybe that history is what is making it harder for me to let go, but the bottom line is, it is just a few weeks. No one gives their heart away in a few weeks.”
“I did,” Amber said.
“So did I,” Rene said.
“Oh, give me a break,” Dena said to Rene. “You fought it every step of the way. You didn’t even marry Cole until after TJ was several months old.”
“That’s because I didn’t want him to feel like he had to marry me because I was pregnant. And then once I realized he really did love me, well, then I didn’t want to be big and fat for my wedding day.”
“It doesn’t matter,” Dena said. “We spent the night together. We had breakfast together Sunday morning and I went home around ten. I did some chores around the house and tried to focus on other things.”
“Like when you could get him naked again?” Amber asked.
“Well, sure. I mean he has only gotten better with age.”
“How bad are his injuries?” Rene asked.
“Bad enough that he’s scarred pretty good. It was a reminder of what he lost and why he was here.”
“So you think that is the only reason he came back?” Amber asked.
“I asked him that. It’s one of the things we’ve talked about. He assured me that wasn’t the case. That he would have been back regardless. That he was realizing things he thought he’d have in life and he didn’t and they weren’t the important things anyway.”
She and Matt still had some serious conversations here and there, fitted in with the fun. She was trying not to read too much into them.
“That’s good then,” Rene said. “Do you believe him?”
“I do. I want to. Then I wonder if I believe him because I want to so much or because I really do.”
Amber reached over for her hand and held it. “You’ll figure it out. Take the time you need. If he can’t wait for you, then it’s not meant to be.”
“I keep telling myself that.”
***
Which was why after work she drove to her father’s house. She didn’t want him to find out through the town grapevine that she was back with Matt. She should have addressed this yesterday after she’d gotten home, but she just wanted to shut it off the rest of the day.
But since Amber heard she was at the p
izza place with Matt, her father was going to know soon enough, if he didn’t already.
“Hey, Dad,” she said, walking through the garage door. “I’m not interrupting anything, am I?”
From his seat on the couch, she knew she wasn’t. He just had the local news on. It was part of his nighttime ritual. He’d come home from work, shower, and sit on the couch to watch the news while he figured out dinner. Then he’d get up and cook. She wondered how much he cooked now that he lived alone.
“Nope, just putting my feet up. What’s going on with you?”
She walked over and sat next to him. “I figured you’d want to hear this from me and not someone else.”
“What? That you’re dating Matt again?”
Her jaw dropped. “Who told you?”
He reached over and lifted her chin back up in place. “No one. I just know you. How long has it been going on?”
“A few weeks. We’ve been on some dates, but I’d say it’s more now.” She didn’t want to admit she slept with him, but her father obviously could figure it out on his own.
He nodded. “Are you happy?”
“At the moment I am.”
“The minute you aren’t I want to know. He and I still need to have some words.”
She groaned. “You don’t need to do that.”
“Yes, I do. And I will. If he’s half the man I always thought he was, he’ll be expecting it too.”
There was no use arguing with him and she didn’t bother to even try. “Can I ask you something?”
“Sure.”
“Have you heard from Mom at all since she left? I know we never talk about it. I guess I’m more curious than anything.”
“I have heard from her. More than I’d like.”
“Really? When was the last time?” She hadn’t expected that her father would keep that from her.
“Last year. I never bring it up because she’s not my favorite person and our conversations always leave a nasty taste in my mouth.”
“Why does she call you?”
“She usually wants money.”
“Please tell me you’re joking! Dad, you haven’t sent her money, have you? She left us!”
“She did and no, I haven’t. Not one damn dime no matter how much she cries or curses at me or blames me for her health.”
“Her health. What’s wrong with her?”
“Oops. Didn’t mean to let that one slip. She has Lyme disease. It’s manageable if she cares for herself, and she doesn’t, so she has issues now and again.”
“I don’t remember her ever being ill. Why would she blame you?”
There was a lot she remembered about her mother and not much of it good, but she’d know if her mother had been that sick and she never had been.
“She claims she got it living here. That I forced her to stay where a tick bit her.”
“But people show symptoms pretty close after they’d been bitten. You would have known.”
“I would have and pointed that all out to her. She claims after she left she’d discovered the tick and went to urgent care. By then it’d been a few days and was all red and puffy.”
“And you believe her?”
“It doesn’t matter at this point,” he argued. “She was still on my insurance and I know the claims went through, so she wasn’t lying about it. Where she got it doesn’t matter. It’s not my fault.”
“You’re damn right.” She was wondering why she was hearing all of this now. “How many times has she reached out to you?”
“Maybe once a year, if that. Like I said, it’s normally when she is down and out and needs cash. I don’t know why she continues to bother me when she knows my opinion on it. She’s never reached out to you, has she?” he asked, his eyes narrowing. “Are you asking me because she has?”
“No, she hasn’t. And if she did now and wanted money, I’d hang the damn phone right up on her too. Why have you never told me before?”
“Because you didn’t need to be burdened with it.”
“Why tell me now?” she asked.
“Because you asked and you never have before.”
She stopped to think about what he said and realized he was right. All these years, she’d never asked about her mom. She didn’t care. She’d been hurt she was left, but then knew she had it better with her father and realized it didn’t matter.
“I never thought of that,” she said.
“Why are you asking now?”
“Matt asked me if I’ve talked to her at all. I don’t know why I even brought it up now when I never cared before.”
“Because things are different now. You’re looking at your life from then and comparing it to now. You’re trying to find things that might make you commit or run.”
“I didn’t realize you were so smart,” she said. She wasn’t going to say that it brought back memories of two people who left her in life too. Things that made her look at herself and wonder what she might have done wrong or how she could have prevented it.
“Of course I am. What’s really bothering you?”
“Am I afraid of commitment like Mom was?”
“Don’t you ever compare yourself to her. You are nothing like her at all.”
Her father didn’t get mad often, but he was showing signs right now. “I never did. I guess I’ve just got so much going through my head that it’s hard to keep things straight.”
“All you need to have going through your head is the fact that you need to do what makes you happy. You’re not selfish like your mother is and you never will be. But I will tell you not to let Matt off the hook too easily either.”
She grinned. “I’m not. Trust me there.”
Warn Me Away
“Thanks for letting me use your library,” Matt said to Dave Lawson.
“Never a problem,” Dave said, shaking his hand. “I’m always willing to help a fellow lawyer out. It does my heart good to know people still use these books. My two associates spend more time on their computer and phone than in here.”
Matt looked Dave over. He was probably in his seventies. There were a few different law firms he could have contacted in Lake Placid to ask if he could use their library, yet he contacted the one his mother sent him in an email. Why, he had no clue.
“Times change, but there is something about sitting down with a book and reading it that way rather than scanning on the computer.”
“The computer is great, but I tend to prefer old school and books,” Dave said. “Follow me down the hall.”
Matt walked in and was shocked at how big his library was. “This is great.” It wasn’t as big as Randall’s firm by any means, but it was impressive for this area.
“Thanks. I’ve built this practice up for decades, but my two associates are young and don’t really want to take over. They don’t want the responsibility of running the firm as much as just trying the cases.”
“You have to wear a few different hats when it’s yours,” Matt said.
He’d seen that with Randall. That he didn’t get to take on as many cases as he’d like because he was splitting his time managing other lawyers as his father started to step down.
“Are you just visiting the area?” Dave asked.
He wasn’t sure what he wanted to say. Or how much he wanted to say. “For a while. I lived here for four years before I went to college. My mother and stepfather still live here.”
“Who’s your mother?”
“Penny McKay.”
“Bob’s wife?” Dave asked.
“Yes. Do you know her?” His mother was sneakier than he thought.
“No. We’ve never met. I know Bob. I’ve tried a few cases where he was called to testify.”
That made sense. “I’m taking some time here to figure out the next stage of my life.”
He was shocked to hear those words out of his mouth. He’d said them enough to Dena, but not to anyone else.
He had an idea of what the next stage of his life was going to be
personally, but work wasn’t something he was focusing on other than what he was doing with Randall.
What he was hating.
What he knew would be short term, but long term was still a mystery to him.
“Did you know I was retiring in a few months?” Dave asked.
“Are you?” Matt said, walking the rows and looking over the books.
“I am.”
“What’s going to happen to your practice?” Matt asked.
“I’m not sure yet. I’ll probably keep it running for the employees I’ve got until I can find someone to buy it. I won’t close the doors and put people out of work, but I want to step back and start to travel with my wife and see more of my grandkids.”
“Sounds like a good plan,” Matt said.
“Let me give you my card,” Dave said. “You look like a smart young man.”
Matt laughed. “I am.”
***
The next morning Matt was just finishing up exercising and was about to jump in the shower when the doorbell rang. He had no clue who could be at his door midmorning.
When he pushed the curtain aside he was face to face with big Conrad Hall. Shit.
He unlocked the door and pulled it open quickly. “Mr. Hall. Come on in.”
“It’s Mr. Hall now?”
“Will you deck me if I call you Conrad?”
Dena’s father laughed like he always had when Matt used to bust on him. He didn’t think he was out of the woods by any means, but it was something. “I want to, but you’d probably sue me.”
“Never,” Matt said. “Can I get you some coffee or something?”
“I’m not staying long. I’m assuming you know why I’m here.”
“You want to warn me away from Dena.”
“No. I wouldn’t do that. I want my girl happy. That’s all I’ve ever wanted in life, but she’s a big girl and can take care of herself now.”
“And I hurt her,” Matt said.
“You’re damn right you did. You ripped her heart out of her chest and stomped on it on the ground, then left it for wild animals to come feast away on it.”