My eyes widen at his threat and I shake my head at him.
Fuck, but that's the worst thing that could ever happen. If my father knew about my pills, he'd not only prohibit me from taking them, but he'd ensure I never find somewhere to get them from.
And a life without pills. No, a day without pills... Hell, even an hour without them would save me living through mental and physical hell.
"Don't tell him," I say, "please," I add, since that word seems to work wonders with him.
I'm willing to beg him if that's what he wants. I'm willing to even apologize for my prank as long as he doesn't tell my father about the pills.
But even in my frightened mind I can realize he now has something over my head, and he will no doubt continue to use it to get me to behave.
What's the alternative, though? Because without those pills... No, that's out of the question. I can't live without them. I'd sooner kill myself than withstand even one day without them, knowing the agony that awaits me, my mind my worst tormenter.
"Maybe," he shrugs, still maintaining that smug expression on his face. "But why would I help you after what you just did?"
I purse my lips, realizing he has me cornered. Especially after what I did to him I have no doubt that he's going to go ratting to my father and...
I squeeze my eyes shut at the imminent nightmare, and I do the one thing I'd never done before. I lower myself to my knees in front of him.
"Please," I bow my head down so he sees I'm serious, but my hands are still clenched as my entire being rebels at this gesture of submission. "Please don't tell him."
"My, but you look quite at home on your knees, sunshine," he laughs at me.
Coming closer, he grasps my jaw in his hands, forcing me to look up at him.
"Tell me, why should I help you?"
It's that lopsided smile that drives me crazy, the way his entire face appears monstrous, the ridges of his scar prominent and looking like my own personified nightmare.
"I'm begging you," I grit the words out, physical pain assaulting me at this humiliation.
"You're begging me?" he asks, his fingers tightening over my jaw. "How nice of you," he drawls, his thumb suddenly on my lips. Without any tenderness, he pushes against my lips, parting them.
"What's in it for me?" his eyes seem to darken as he looks down on me, his size even more frightening from my position.
"What... what do you want?" I try to hold my voice steady, even though there's only fake confidence at this point.
He's threatening me with the one thing that allows me to live like a normal person. And for that I'm afraid to admit to myself that I would do anything.
And he sees it too, as his mouth slowly curls up, an insidious smile that would make anyone weep at the horrific sight.
"What do I want indeed," he pauses, smirking. He's keeping me on my toes by delaying the inevitable. And he's doing a perfect job with it, because even in my semi-high state, I can feel a sliver of anxiety spike through.
My hands are balled into fists as I stare into his arrogant face.
"Show me how good you are on your knees, and I might not tell your father." He raises his eyebrows at me expectantly, and I can only gape at him, flabbergasted.
"What do you mean?" I ask softly, although my heart is beating like crazy in my chest.
Didn't I already know he was going to ask for that?
"You wound me, sunshine!" He spreads his palm over his chest, feigning pain. "You know exactly what I mean. I want you to take my cock out and show me how good you are on your knees," he smirks.
My tongue peeks out to wet my lips, my palms sweaty, my entire being on the verge of an attack.
I can't do it. I can't... But do I have a choice? If he tells my father, then he'll make sure I'm never going to be able to get my pills. Even worse, my father will no doubt inform my future husband too, and that... I can't have that.
I already know my life is going to be a living hell from the moment I say I do, but at least the pills will help me bear the brunt of it. Without them...
"No? Fine," he shrugs, pulling out his phone to dial my father.
"I'll do it," the words are bitter in my mouth as I say them.
And just like that, I'm once more put in a position where all choices are taken away from me—not that I've ever had many to begin with.
God, am I doing the right thing? Is this humiliation worth it? Because I know that for him it's nothing more than payback for what I did to him.
Yet just as the thought surfaces, I know that it's worth it. The pills are worth it.
They are worth everything.
"What are you waiting for then?" His voice startles me from my thoughts.
"Aren't you going to..." I trail off, pointing towards his pants, a blush creeping up on my face.
"And do all the work for you?" he shakes his head, his arms once more crossed over his chest as he watches me closely, waiting for my next move.
I steel myself, somewhat thankful I'd managed to take a pill before this. It will make me more likely to withstand it.
With shaky fingers, I reach out for his belt, unbuckling it. He's still wearing the dress pants from before, and the material makes it easy to recognize he's already hard, the outline of his cock a little daunting.
I fumble with the zipper, my mind in a million places as I reach inside to cup his dick.
"That's it, sunshine. Now take it out and put it in your mouth," he says as my palm brushes over his warm flesh.
And it is warm. I guess I'd never stopped to think about that, everything else about him so cold and mean.
I try to circle my fingers around his girth, but I can't. And when I take it out of his pants, I can see why.
Instinctively, I bite my lip at the sight.
It's huge. Thick and veiny, it looks so angry as it seems to twitch in my direction.
"Are you going to just stare at it?" I look up to see him watching me with narrowed eyes, as if he's convinced I'm going to bail at any minute. The phone is still in his hand, peeking through the crook of his arm, a perpetual reminder of what's at stake.
"No," I mumble, swallowing hard and taking a deep breath.
I can do this.
Tucking my hair behind my ears, I place both hands on his cock as I angle my face towards it. Without giving it more thought than necessary, I open my mouth, closing my lips over the head.
It doesn't taste as bad as I thought it would. There's just a tinge of saltiness as my tongue makes contact with his flesh.
"Fuck," he mutters, and I quickly look up, afraid I've done something wrong.
His eyes are droopy, his lips slightly parted and I take it to mean I'm doing something right. The faster I get this over with, the sooner I'll be able to forget it.
Forget him.
My hands are awkwardly gripping the shaft as I push him further into my mouth, my teeth slightly grazing his skin.
"No teeth," he hisses, his hand suddenly in my hair as he pulls my head back. "Don't even think about biting my dick off." He dangles the phone in front of me, the threat clear.
I frown a little. I hadn't meant to do that. Of course, I would love nothing more than to geld him, but that would only make him more eager to tell my father about my pills.
I nod slowly, and he grunts, his hand leaving my hair and urging me to return to what I was doing.
I'm a little unsure how to proceed, but I try my best to mask my teeth with my lips as I guide the head back into my mouth. I open wide, attempting to fit as much of him into my mouth as I can. When the head of his cock reaches the back of my throat, I stop.
"What are you doing?" His raised voice takes me by surprise, and I lift my eyes to his.
"Fuck, you're useless, aren't you?" He grits the words, his fingers back in my hair, pulling so hard, my scalp burns with pain. I blink twice, looking at him and trying to understand what he wants from me.
He's holding my head back, his dick sliding out of my mouth and l
eaving a trail of saliva in its wake.
"For all your beauty you give a man a limp cock with those stiff lips of yours," he jibes, a sick smile on his face. He leans down, his face close to mine as he whispers, "you just let the man do all the work, don't you, sunshine? You just lie back and let them rut between your thighs, don't you?" he drawls in my ear, the sound almost painful.
There are so many things I wish I could say, so many insults I wish I could hurl at him. But I can't. Not when he owns my secret.
Instead, I just shake my head slightly, trying to get out of his painful hold.
"Show me how you suck, sunshine. Properly," he speaks low in his throat, the bass of his voice making me shiver. "Show me how that pretty mouth of yours works dick, because it ain't good for much else," he chuckles.
Humiliation burns at my cheeks but I can't show him that. Damn, but I can't do anything.
I'm truly caught.
Leaning back, he nods at me to continue.
For all my show of bravado earlier, I'm a little afraid now. Because I don't know what I'm doing and if I don't do it right, he will call my father.
I think back to all the things Anna and Lindsay had said over the years, coming up slightly empty because I'd never paid attention.
I look up to see him waiting, his brow slightly raised, the ridge of his scar even more prominent in the harsh lighting of the night.
Swallowing hard, I turn my attention to his dick, tightening my hands around it and leading it back to my mouth. I let my tongue play with the head, all the while watching him and his reactions to know if I'm doing something right.
His breath hitches when I lick a spot under the head, and I see the sudden clench of his fists. Convinced this might work, I continue to lick and tickle the area before sucking his head deep into my mouth, being mindful of my teeth.
"Fuck," he curses out, his hand in my hair as he pushes me forward, his cock going in deeper. "That's it, sunshine, suck that real nice," he grunts, thrusting his hips towards my face.
The head makes contact with the back of my throat and I gag, my hands immediately on his hips as I push him from me. I find it hard to breathe as he all but chokes me with his dick.
Tears gather at the corners of my eyes as he keeps me still. His palm spread across the back of my head, he doesn't allow me to pull back. He pushes his dick in and out of my mouth, his breathing harsh as he increases his speed, fucking my mouth even harder.
The urge to bite is overwhelming, but I know I can't do that without suffering dire consequences, so I just take it. I force myself to stay there as he keeps on thrusting in and out of me.
When at last he slows his movements, he looks down at me, his hand coming to rest on my face as he swirls his thumb on my cheek, closer and closer to my mouth until he slips it between my lips, forcing them to open wider.
"You can't even work a cock, but you want to work a man," he tsks at me, amused.
Spit is dribbling down my jaw, and he swipes it up, lathering it over his cock as he takes it in his own hand, fisting the length up and down.
"Eyes on me, sunshine," he commands, and I do. I look up to find him staring at me with a mix of rage and desire. His silver eyes look black in the darkness of the night, his irises indistinguishable from his pupils.
He continues to work his cock up and down, his movements increasing in speed as he holds eye contact.
Out of nowhere, spurts of warm liquid land on my face. Startled, I make to pull back. But one look at him, and I know he wouldn't like that. So I keep myself still as more and more drops of his cum spray on my face.
"Good girl," he rumbles, his thumb still on my cheek as he splays the cum around before pushing it into my mouth.
I keep on staring into his eyes, even as he keeps on feeding me his cum, the taste slightly bitter, but not as unpleasant as I would have thought.
For a second, everything falls away as I lose myself in his gaze. Even his scar fails to register, the intensity of his eyes almost addictive.
His lips pull up in a sinister smile as he leans down, his mouth close to my ear. I can feel his breath on my skin, the effect immediate as goosebumps appear all over my body. I feel shivery, and I don't know if it's a good thing or not.
"Check mate," he rasps, his voice like molten lava to my senses. "Who's covered in cum now?"
Just as soon as he utters the words, he's gone from my side. He tucks himself back in his pants, his back a retreating figure.
It takes me a moment to find my words, and as I realize why he'd done this—the ultimate humiliation for me—I can't help but yell after him.
"Fuck you, asshole!"
He doesn't hear me. Or if he does, he doesn't care.
My knees hurt, the small pebbles on the ground imprinted in my flesh. There are still streaks of cum on my face and in my hair. My lips are swollen and puffy, my face red and tear-streaked.
But that's nothing compared to how I feel inside. Compared with how he made me feel.
Shame burns even deeper in my gut as I stand up, a gust of air brushing under my dress and making the wetness between my legs feel even more humiliating.
I hate that he caught me at my worst. I hate that he knows my secret and can now control me. But more than anything, I hate that a part of me wasn't indifferent to it. A part of me... liked it.
And that's the worst offence of all.
Chapter Seven
"Where are we going? My dance lessons are in the opposite direction!" She demands, scandalized. Her hands are splayed on the window of the car as she looks outside, frowning as she sees us go in the wrong direction.
Fortuitously, or not, her driver had gotten sick the day before, and now it's up to me to drive her around while he's on leave.
Fuck! This is exactly what I did not need. Unfettered access to little miss spoiled is only going to get me in more trouble.
I clench my hands on the steering wheel, the memory of the disaster of last night still fresh in my mind.
I never thought I had it in me to react like that, yet I couldn't help myself. Not when I saw her hugging that scrawny little kid, looking so fucking content in his embrace.
If before I would have overlooked her little pranks and the way she'd wanted to embarrass me to get me to resign, when I saw that boy touch her—and even worse, her accepting the touch—I'd gone nuclear.
An angry fog had descended upon my mind and I'd wanted nothing better than to take her. Take her and erase all traces of that kid's hands from her body.
When I'd recognized the pills she'd dropped on the floor, I'd known that I had an opening.
And I'd taken full advantage of it.
Fuck, but I don't know what had come over me, but in that moment I would have done anything to mark her—in any way.
I wanted her to hate me. Oh, I wanted her to despise me, but I also wanted something else.
Something that seemed hidden in those beautiful eyes of hers, behind all the glitz and glamor, behind the façade that she shows to the world.
I wanted to see her.
Vulnerable. Exposed.
At my mercy.
Fuck me and my impulsive behavior.
I don't think I've ever reacted so viscerally to something in my life.
I've never been a jealous man.
Hell, I've never even been in an actual relationship. When you do what I do, it's hard to find someone to put up with it. It's especially hard to find someone who wouldn't call the cops on you if they saw you covered in blood at four A.M., rummaging through the fridge for a goddamn beer.
I'm reacting to her in ways that are completely foreign to me.
But most importantly, I've never gone without a condom, even for a blowjob. The mere fact that it had slipped my mind when I knew her reputation is astounding.
I've never been careless before. Never.
And it had taken me just a second of seeing her in the arms of another man to throw caution to the wind.
Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.
There's also the other elephant in the room. The fact that I'd basically blackmailed her into blowing me. But, God, if her mouth on my bare cock hadn't been the most intense thing I've ever felt...
I don't think there are words to describe the high I'd felt when I'd looked down to see those pretty lips of hers wrapped around my cock. Fuck, I've been fantasizing about that since the first time I saw her. To actually have that turn into reality...
"Where are you taking me?" She repeats, turning those fiery eyes towards me, and damn if I'm not hard again.
In a way, I'd thought that one taste of her and I'd get her out of my system. But now, she's wormed her way into my head even more.
I look at her and all I can think is her spread out on the backseat, my cock in her pussy and my name on her lips as she moans her pleasure.
I want to tame her. Fuck the mean girl out of her and...
"Damn," I grumble, realizing I'm having a fucking hard time putting a damper on my attraction to her.
But this isn't even attraction. It's something else. Something bordering on obsession, since there's not a minute when I don't think of her luscious lips and...
I groan out loud.
It must be the fact that she hates me just as much as I hate her, and her dislike of me only serves to make me harder like I'm some sick bastard.
"You'll see," is all I say when she gets restless, and I try my damned hardest to not look at her. At how her long legs are barely covered by the skirt she's wearing, or how every time she shifts in her seat I can get a little peek at her panties and...
I'm painfully hard, my dick straining against my zipper and I know I can find no relief. Not unless I hold her secret addiction over her head again, and I don't want to do that. Not again.
No, the next time she comes to me it will be of her own volition, and she's going to beg me to fuck her.
I just need to get myself under control so I don't screw up again like last night. For all my dislike of her, she's making me act out of character.
Maybe it's the fact that I haven't gotten laid in too long. Or maybe it's just her otherworldly beauty, because there's no one in the world who would not concede that she's a perfectly shaped feminine specimen. Hell, I doubt there's anyone who would dare say she's anything other than spectacular.
Frivolous: A DARK MAFIA AGE-GAP ROMANCE Page 9