It had to happen…It was all so clear now!
But who or what had pressed the button for this to happen? Of course, he could decide not to come back, not to step out of coma. This was still within his power…or was it not? Nobody could force him to return into his physical body. Not doing so, he would be back, yes, into his out-of-time library. Except that Shootik would not be coming back to see him. Not from now onwards…He could no longer deceive himself. His time was switched off, as it were. They were all on ground zero now, and there was no way back.
What this meant, only he could tell. His aubergine-coloured book had been clear about this.
His time as Staretz was over. The world was waiting for him. Only…what he had to do now was different.
Thirteenth Picture
There was something special on that day when Shootik came to visit the Old Man. He had a stern look on his face, like somebody holding an important message to be delivered. In fact, he had. It was a small piece of paper folded in two which he handed to Staretz, who took it from him but did not unfold it.
“What is it?” The piece of paper was vibrating in his hand.
“You may not understand it; therefore, I have to tell you. It’s a word, just one word, which is also a code to open that part of your book which has remained closed to you up to now. The part which she had written, when she left you.”
Oh yes! He knew…Those were the parts which became diffuse and unreadable every time he set eyes on them. He often tried to decipher them, but with no success. Which word, he wondered, might be the key to them? The folded piece of paper trembled in his hand whilst he tried to gain time.
“Do you…do you know the word?”
“No. I haven’t read it, and I must not know it. I’m just a messenger. The word is yours and it must not be told to anybody else. Besides, it would make no sense to anybody else, it is a key to your life-story…I’ll leave you now.”
“Will you come back?”
“I shall…but you may not recognise me.”
And off he went, leaving, little as he was, a huge empty space in the Old Man’s study. A space for his soul to come back and to take him further…
We are not allowed to reveal the contents of his book, which he could finally read with the keyword which was given to him, but we can report that he spent many hours, days and nights, taking them in…in small doses, like an invigorating substance, an elixir of life. What he thought was lost for ever, was returning to him…Solveig, his soulmate, had kept it warm and alive in her heart, knowing intuitively that one day he would re-claim it. It would happen when he had seen enough, suffered enough from witnessing the effects of his own errors of thinking, in the life histories of thousands of other people. Because errors can’t be avoided on this path called human development…or evolution, if we wish.
Because we cannot learn otherwise and nobody can teach us what is right or wrong. We have to find it out by ourselves, and take different steps after that. In the meantime, as F. Dürrenmatt wrote,
‘Whoever boards the wrong train may run to the back of it. He still ends up, however, where he didn’t want to be.’
That is to say, nevertheless, where he needs to be in order to start a new life cycle.
Chapter 15
The Soulway, the Way of the Heart
This is a path which is not marked by the ordinary sequence of events which compose human life-stories. It is a way which reveals itself when the widespread, generally accepted, ideas about human relationships are lived up to and through their breaking points. When people find themselves on the bleeding edge of their dreams and fancies, facing the great unknown…
On that threshold between the material and immaterial reality, where the world is apparently split in two halves. On that threshold, words are energy, love being energy of the highest sort. Generated by the human heart on a non-physical level, this energy sustains the life of the body beyond its physiological functions. The heart is the centre of intelligence, perception and balance in the human body and mind.
The heart is the guardian of the soul. It protects the soul with its life, if necessary! Souls, at the present time, are in danger of being ‘switched off’, declared non-existent. They need someone to take care of them. These some-ones used to be women, who by nature’s grace and a higher calling, took upon themselves the task of watching over someone else’s soul, usually a male’s. The woman herself needed not to be aware of being in this position, exerting a Soulway-function at the service of humanity. Some such women were the priestesses in ancient cults, others were initiated for special purposes, to which they were assigned for a lifetime. Great knowledge was entrusted to women, and some, of course, misused the power it gave them.
Solveig was a Soulway person, who lived a multidimensional reality. On levels inaccessible to ordinary consciousness, she was still in contact with things gone by. Gone by, only on the sequential side of time.
Time…a word saying nothing about itself. Where does it start and where does it go? What if there is nowhere to come from or to go to?
Solveig had to sign for the post she received that morning. It came by express and registered mail service. That was strange. A white envelope, addressed ‘To Anna’. Probably another life-story from one of her readers, she thought. She opened it carefully. A bundle of handwritten pages on both sides felt heavy in her hand. Who might be writing to her and to such extent? She glanced at the back of the envelope for the sender. None. Turning to the last page and its end, she got a shock: A…Just a big capital A! Placing the bundle on the table and straightening it, feeling already that this was not to be put aside, she saw a smaller envelope. The note inside it read:
‘Dear Anna, please receive the enclosure and deal with it in the best possible way you can think of. Do not try to contact me, since I may no longer be here. Get Jurij out of the clinic. Hand the attached note to Dr Huang, the physician in charge, personally. He will release the patient. Hurry! Yours very truly, (no signature)’
The other note was written in a strange language. As though she was struck by a higher order, Solveig knew what she had to do, and do it immediately: get Jurij out of that clinic! Time was running fast now, and they would not be sleeping. Every hour counted. Her out-of-or-beyond-time awareness, which used to disturb her when she was a young person, served her well at this moment. In no time at all, she collected the documents she needed and made herself ready for the journey. In her mind’s eye, the itinerary was all worked out: taxi to the airport, a last-minute seat on a flight to Copenhagen and a taxi again to that place.
She got there just in time, before dark. Asking the driver to wait for her no matter how long it might take, she made her way to the gate. It was, of course, closed. Through the gate’s iron bars and the intricate pattern of lilies between them, she saw a wide drive leading to the main building. At her ringing of the bell, a man in uniform came out of a sentry box and looked at her sternly. “Yes, madam?” the question mark raising the tone of his voice.
“I’m here to speak to Dr Huang, immediately!” Solveig measured the guard from top to toe with a flashing look. “I have written orders for this purpose!” She took A’s addressed envelope out of her bag.
The guard looked perplexed for a second, and then he composed himself, opened a small window in the gate and asked her to pass him the envelope.
“No," Solveig replied, holding it back,”I have to hand it personally to Dr Huang, please take me to him!"
Her look and posture were surely clearly demanding and the guard was obviously not quite sure what to do.
“I insist," Solveig added,”it is very urgent, and you may be in trouble if you delay this procedure!"
It was obvious that the guard was not used to being addressed like this. As for Solveig, her determination to pass through that gate and come out of it again within the next hour made her eyes glow with a threatening fire, which made the poor man turn on his heels whilst murmuring:
“Please wait, madam
,” and off he was, hurrying up to the main entrance.
It did not take long before he came back accompanied by another fellow wearing a receptionist’s blue jacket and tie. Looking apologetically at Solveig, he motioned to the guard to open the gate.
"Please excuse us, madam, we are not used to being visited without announcement…Please come in."
Solveig acknowledged his apology with a cool smile:
"Of course, this is a special case."
Resolutely, with the blue jacket at her heels, she stepped towards the main entrance. The entrance hall was luxuriously furnished and decorated. A five stars kind of a hotel, for those who could pay…or had somebody who paid for their stay…Solveig thought, when a young woman, also in uniform appeared smilingly in front of her.
“You asked to speak to Dr Huang, madam? Can I have your name, please?”
“My name will be known to Dr Huang when you take me to him.” Then, placidly: "I’m on special duty here."
“Of course…” the woman nodded "…I understand. Please be seated, madam, I’ll be back in a minute…"
“Make it a short minute!” Solveig called in her cool tone again.
The woman was indeed back soon to lead Solveig to Dr Huang’s office. Expecting to see a Chinese or Japanese-looking fellow, Solveig was amazed to be face to face with a tall, blond Viking-of-a-man with pale blue eyes.
“Dr…Huang? Prof Dr Huang?” Solveig’s amazement was genuine. The Viking smiled.
“Yes, madam, at your service. And you…?”
Instead of answering him, Solveig handed him the envelope, then she added:
"This will explain my unexpected visit, Doctor, and the hurry."
The man took his time to open the envelope and to take the folded sheet of paper out of it. He read it twice, Solveig observed, his facial expression changing from disbelief to concern.
“This is most unusual,” he said, “our patients are usually given time to get accustomed to the idea of being discharged…”
“I know…we know,” Solveig changed spontaneously to we know, “but this one is special, as you certainly know…and I am here to take him with me now.”
“You are…?”
Solveig did not wait for him to finish the question before completing it for him:
"Of course I am, and on special duty in this case. My name must not be mentioned but if you tell the patient that Sol is here to fetch him, he will know."
“Sol…yes, madam…but this hurry…” the doctor was obviously not quite convinced.
“Dr Huang,” Solveig had no time to lose, “I can’t tell you more but," she lowered her voice:”we are sailing tonight…and we need our friend to be with us. We’ll be off the continent before midnight (she remembered A’s phrase!) therefore…my taxi is waiting, Dr Huang, so if you please proceed according the orders from…you certainly know who!"
“Of course.” Dr Huang rose from his seat. "Please wait here, Miss…Sol."
Sol…for a timeless moment Solveig was swung back into memories of their innocent, childlike first love, when he called her Sol, his sunshine…How different it sounded from Sol, the abbreviation of her name A had decided to call her to match the other ladies, Barb, Mag and some other of the gang…Solveig chased her memories away, none of them really adequate for this moment.
She was on the enemy’s territory, if not of the villains’ themselves, their undercover collaborators, which could be even worse. One false move and Dr Huang would see through her. He was not a fool, after all. As soon as he left the room, a lady in a perfectly fitting white and blue outfit, not a uniform, came in, holding a tray with a bottle of mineral water and a glass on it.
“You may be thirsty,” she said with a smile, placing the tray on the corner of the big desk, within Solveig’s reach, “here is some refreshment!”
Solveig glanced at the water bottle, not that water, she approved, this one was alright to drink. She thanked the lady for it. Where might Dr Huang have gone? He had A’s note in his hand when he left the room. If he were to check, from another room’s telephone, or by any other means…Solveig felt a shiver down her spine at this thought, her performance might be over. What then…? Maybe he had to decode the strange language in which the note was written…or call A for confirmation? Dreadful minutes passed. They became as heavy as lead when Dr Huang walked back into his office. He had a file in his hand and the note which he placed open on his desk, straightening the paper.
“Well, Miss Sol…I had to check the patient’s records and the latest entries…We are very strict about this, as you may know.”
Solveig felt her heart throbbing in her throat. What was to come next?
“Yes, we know,” she said as casually as possible.
“You know what this note means?” Dr Huang touched the note on his desk.
“My orders were given verbally, Doctor,” Solveig managed to say in an even cooler tone, aware that this could be a trick question to find out how much she really knew about the content of the note. She looked at her watch:
“If there are no further problems, Dr Huang, we would be most obliged if you could speed up the procedures so that I can take…our friend,” she accentuated the word friend, "back to our company."
She mentioned the Green Dolphin Enterprise, hoping this would do. It did. Dr Huang scribbled some words in Jurij’s file, signed it and handed the file to the lady who had brought the water, saying:
“Sam, please take care of this procedure. The patient will certainly need some time to pack his personal belongings.”
Solveig took a deep breath, doing this as imperceptibly as possibly. Turning to her, the doctor said:
“You know that you will be responsible for this patient’s well-being the moment you leave our premises?”
“Of course, Doctor, no problem about that, and…” she added with a smile, "thank you very much for everything!"
The man rose from his seat. “Sam…Samantha, will show you the way to our waiting room.” He gave her his hand, dismissing her. Sam took the lead, showing her the way into a nicely furnished, cosy room with a view into the gardens, lit by a late sunset. Quite a well-chosen view for a health recovery clinic, as this establishment advertised its existence in a most elegant way. Everything fitted, including this view, and the location of the waiting room. Who could imagine anything else being put into practice here?
Sam was watching Solveig examining the room and choosing a seat, near the window.
“Would you like something else to drink, ma’am; a coffee or tea, or a fruit juice perhaps? We can also offer you a snack.”
“No thank you, very kind of you and…” she put an admiring look on her face, "this is really a very nice place!"
Sam looked pleased.
“Yes,” she said, "we are very happy to be here, and offering the best service."
“I’m sure,” Solveig agreed. Sam was gone, and Solveig took precautions not to undo too quickly the approving look on her face, just in case there might be a camera installed in the room.
The setting sun was just touching the horizon, which Solveig could see through a corner of the window, when Jurij entered the room, accompanied by a male nurse carrying a suitcase and a shoulder bag. Jurij was looking well and neatly dressed in good quality sport slacks and jacket. He stopped, clearly amazed at seeing Solveig there.
“Sol…” he said, “you here?” Solveig rose, smiled brightly and stepped forwards to embrace him.
“Yes, Jurij,”
She patted his back, saying mentally stop with further questions now…hoping he would understand, as he used to. He did. Still smiling at him she said aloud, winking her left eye slightly to make him understand this was just show:
“All is ready for your return to the company and I happened to be free to come and fetch you! We shall be sailing tonight; there was no time for an advance notice.”
Enough explanations, out of here as quickly as acceptable! The male nurse looked apologetically towards the
luggage he had put down.
“This is as much as we could collect, ma’am, in this short time. There could be more things to be found…”
Solveig interrupted him:
“Please put them together and we’ll have them collected in due course! Now, we have to go!”
“This way, please,” the nurse opened the door for them and guided them into the reception hall. He made a sign towards the desk. Oh yes, the documents. Jurij’s documents, he had to have them back. Solveig asked for them directly. The lady behind the counter said:
“Yes, of course, before that, however, ma’am, please sign here.” They needed her name and signature for dismissal of the patient and her acceptance of responsibility for him from that moment onwards. Precisely as the doctor told her. That was not on her programme, she could not sign with her real name. Taking the pen in her hand and pretending to be naturally ready to use it on the assigned space on the paper, she suddenly lifted it again and said:
“This patient is being released in full control of his physical and mental abilities. He is perfectly capable of taking care of himself. Therefore,” Solveig handed Jurij the pen, "he should sign this paper himself."
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