by Sam Hall
“Stop,” I said, pulling away, but his arm yanked me back beside him. “I wondered how the hell I was going to keep up with you guys sexually, but it feels like my sex drive has multiplied for each new partner. Walking around with five times the lady boner isn’t as comfortable as you’d think.”
“Five? Or is it six now?”
He nodded over to a corner of the yard where Jack, Hawk, and Shaun stood with a bunch of other single men. “Do you mean Jack or Hawk?”
“I dunno, what do you think?”
“Brandon told me to be honest with you.”
“Yeah, so what do you honestly think?”
“I don’t know about those two. Jack and Hawk, there’s obviously a thing going on there, and I’m not sure why they want to put me in the middle of it.”
“A smart observation, but he’s just given you a person. There’s no real precedent to this, but if I had to guess, Hawk will be living in the house with us. He belongs to you. What I’m asking is what you’re going to do with him?”
“What do you want me to do with him? That one word he spoke today is the most I’ve heard from him, ever. I have no idea who he is. He’s a complete stranger.” Slade just watched me, taking a swig from his beer. “I don’t know what to do with him. No one's ever given me a person before.” He nodded. “What do you want me to say, Slade? Do you want me to fuck him? Want him to be the one who comes in me first, so you can after, like you said about Aaron?” He shrugged noncommittally. My teeth ground together, my fingers gripping the neck of my bottle hard. “Look, there was this moment—”
“And there it is,” Slade said with a smirk.
I scowled at him. “Do you want me to tell you, or not?”
“Of course, princess. I got something down the bond, but I couldn’t tell what. Jack, that’s pretty straightforward. Outsider girls love an arsehole, but Hawk...” We both turned to look at the man in question.
“I saw him when I was out running, on my first day. I ran past the creek down the bottom of the hill and saw him working in the afternoon sun. Everything looked golden, you know the way it does late in the afternoon. He was standing there, no shirt on, all those muscles on display, but with no idea I was looking. And then he saw me. I felt the most intense need to run, so I took off up the hill. He wasn’t going to chase me, I knew that, it was just some weird feeling, but...”
“But...?”
“When I turned around, he was halfway across the field, looking like he was about to climb over the fence after me.”
Slade smirked at that. “He probably was, catching scent of a receptive female. All right, now I know what we’re working with, I can accommodate that.”
“Working with what? Accommodate what? Slade, this is your night. If what people tell me is true, then it's the most important night of your life, apart from maybe the birth of your kids. Isn’t it bad enough that I blew Brandon in the storeroom and Finn just got me off in the lounge room?”
“That right?” His eyebrow jerked up. “Well, you have had a busy day. So what’s the problem?”
“The problem is in my world, a woman looking at another guy on her wedding day is reasonable grounds for stoning, let alone discussing adding yet another dude to her bedroom roster. I get that you guys have this whole polygamist thing going here, but even in that situation, shouldn’t today be about you? I didn’t even stick around to meet your parents.” I felt my Tirian rise up inside me, my eyes tightening. “I’m a fucking shitty partner, Slade. You made this huge leap with me, and I’ve been off with everyone else but you.”
“Jules...” He reached out to touch my face, but I shook him off. I couldn’t let the lovely sucking warmth of our bond reassure me into thinking this was right.
“I do love you, Slade. You’re funny and sarcastic, and you push my buttons like no one’s business. I want to clean your clock every damn time you call me princess. Do I look like a fucking princess to you?” He opened his mouth, about to reply, but I charged on. “In my world, when you love someone, you know when the other person’s needs are just as important or more than your own. You were so bloody happy when I bonded you and I...” I swallowed, the words growing bigger, harder in my throat, so I had to force them out. “I bailed. I want better for you than me. I want someone who can take care of you, put you first, love you, be honoured to meet your family, be at your side to welcome the guests to celebrate the most important day of your life. Someone who can put you first, because I’ve got no idea what I’m doing. I’m a fucking mess, getting led around by my clit and then wondering how the fuck I ended up here.”
For a second, I endured the agony of looking into the eyes of someone I loved and waiting for the axe to fall. What else could I do? I’d behaved badly. I deserved anything that came my way.
To say what came next was unexpected was an understatement. He wrenched me close, burying his nose in my hair. I could feel the shake of his arms as they wrapped around me.
“And that’s how I know it’ll always be you for me, love. You could perch there, like a true princess, taking everything we give you as your due and using us until there’s nothing left, but you don’t. Don’t you dare talk about yourself like that again. I don’t need perfect, Jules, I just need you. Let’s face it, we all know I’m a bit of a cunt. Never keep my mouth shut when I should.” A burst of laughter fought its way out. “I gob off left and right, but still, you want me around.” He pulled back slightly, smoothing my hair from my face. “Better than that, you seem to value at least some of what I say, and that which you don’t, well you listen because it gives you access to my mighty, mighty cock.”
I snorted, then sniffled, in that weird place between hysterical laughter and tears.
“It’s OK, sweetheart, no need to cry. I’ll give it to you good after all these nice people go home.”
“Fuck you,” I said, pounding on his shoulder “I’m trying to be noble, here.”
“Noble’s boring, I much prefer you naked and in that very interesting position we had you in the other day...”
“Fuck,” I cried, resting my head on his chest. "I take it all back, every single word.”
“Will you at least listen to me before making major life decisions?”
“Yeah, of course.”
“Will you listen to me if I bring any of my concerns to you?”
“Sure, but—”
“Will you make time for me, sometimes just the two of us, if I need it?”
“Of course, Slade. You just have to say.”
“Will you get me a beer from the fridge, if I ask?”
“Well...”
“Rub my fevered brow when I get back from work?”
“Um...”
His grin was bright and pure, “Then that’s it. It’s you and me, and whoever else you choose to add to this ragtag band of misfits.”
“Well, I think that concludes the official bonding ceremony.”
I swivelled around to see most of the party was standing around, looking on all misty-eyed, and Ophelia was smiling down on both of us. She turned to Kelly. “The official ceremony is redundant at this point, don’t you agree?” Her daughter nodded stiffly, scanning the crowd as if to gauge people’s responses to that. She wouldn’t have gotten much, everyone surged forward and surrounded us. Suddenly, we were at the centre of a massive crowd of well-wishers.
“Lovely ceremony, guys, damn near brought a tear to my eye.”
“This one’s a keeper, Slade. Just watch that mouth doesn’t run away with you.”
“Beautiful, love. You hold that man tight for me, you hear?”
Cheryl and Lisa fought their way through the throng to appear by our sides with several men in tow.
“I’m so sorry, love, for bursting in on you like that,” Cheryl said. “You must have thought me a madwoman. Of course, you’re having doubts, being an outsider and all, but it’ll all work out. You should hear some of the stories about me and Slade’s dads.”
“Mum, dial it back
. You’ve already scared the girl out of her own house once. Let’s avoid a second time. These are our dads, Angus, Jim, and Brock.”
Angus, a big, blustery looking redhead surged forward and enfolded me in a tight hug. “Welcome to the family, love. I’m so glad you picked our son.”
“Ease up, Gus,” a dry voice said. I was let go and took in some much needed breaths when Brock came over. He and Lisa had a lot of physical similarities, being lighter in build and with dark hair and complexions. “Welcome, love. I’m sorry this has all been a bit overwhelming.” He shot a look at Cheryl, who laughed a little guiltily. “They’ll learn to behave, I promise.”
Jim moved closer, giving me a small, private smile. He didn’t say anything, just took me in his arms and hugged me to his chest. A strange calm throbbed through me, washing away all the spikes of emotion, both negative and positive, until I felt almost a little dizzy with it. “It’ll be OK,” he said. “The Great Wolf wouldn’t let you take the wrong steps.”
“Well, that’s enough for today,” Lisa said. “The poor girl has obviously had a lot to deal with.” Cheryl and Angus went to say something, but she held up a hand. “They’re mated, people. You’ll have plenty of time to get to know her. Now, if you want them to have a chance to start making those babies you keep harping on about, shoo! Go on!”
“You shouldn’t boss your mother, Lisa,” Brock said, arms folded on his chest.
“Well, you know how she gets. Endless clucking. No wonder Julie went AWOL. I would too, if it was at all possible.”
“You need your own men to redirect that energy towards,” he replied, cocking an eyebrow. I looked at Slade, then him. He didn’t look like he was Slade’s bio dad—that probably being Angus—but that expression was so familiar.
“Oh, if I could find anyone I could stand for even three minutes, and it got me out of the nest? I’d be on that in a second, believe me. Now, are we finished airing our dirty laundry in front of our newest family member?”
Brock rolled his eyes but slung an arm around his daughter’s neck, bringing her in close. “Come by in a day or two. Don’t leave it for too long, or you’ll have them beating down your door. We’ll have a nice dinner, away from all the hoopla.”
“Oh, there’ll be plenty of hoopla, just of a much more intimate variety,” Lisa said with a grin before giving me a hug. “Hang in there,” she whispered. “He’s worth it, I promise.”
I was standing there, blinking and feeling like I was completely wrung out, when Kelly said, “Well, if we’re dispensing with the official ceremony, perhaps we can move on to the petitions.”
“We better get you a chair, love,” Slade said, pulling away from me and disappearing into the house.
“Come forward, Julie,” Kelly said with a smile. I dutifully took my place by her side as a bunch of the single men moved forward. A lot of single men.
“Here, love,” Slade said, putting a chair down behind me. I sat down slowly, a little weirded out by being the focus of so many eyes. I smoothed my skirt down, an action that many followed closely. I snatched my hand back, feeling weird. “Don’t worry,” he said, stroking my shoulder. “You don’t have to accept any of them, if you don’t want.”
“Trying to skew the results before we even make our case?” Sonny stepped forward, crossing his arms across his impressive chest. “That requires a response, Slade.”
“Sonny—” Kelly said.
“Calm down, step back, and go have a beer,” I said. “I’m not interested.”
“What the—”
“I’ve seen you with your hands all over another woman, and you were rude when I came to see Brandon. Not interested,” I said.
“The woman has spoken.”
Sonny had been about to dispute this. I saw him and his cronies start to shift in the group, but the whip of Kelly’s voice stopped them in their tracks. I watched the matriarchs move from their spot under the tree, saw them move closer to the proceedings, but Sonny and his cronies pulled back, their spaces taken by others.
“Now, who will make the first petition?”
“I will.”
We turned to see Brandon coming down the steps and into the backyard, his smile impish when he saw me. The guys milling around in front of us gave him ground begrudgingly, many looming over him as he came closer, but he paid them no mind. As soon as he was front and centre, he dropped down to one knee.
“Julie, daughter of Marian, I ask that you accept this token as a symbol of my regard for you. I wish to start the petitioning process to join your pack. My deepest wish is that I will prove worthy, and that I will take a place by your side.” He pulled a book out from within an interior pocket of his jacket and held it out. “As part of my offer, I give you...” his eyes darted down to the book, “everything I am. I hold nothing back. Anything I have, you may ask for. The strength of my arm, the convolutions of my brain, the tick of my heart. Jules, it's all yours anyway. This is just a formality.”
I dropped down to my knees in front of him and placed a hand on the book, ready to accept it, but he kept a hold of it. “I don’t want you to take it yet,” he said in a low voice.
“OK, will they still accept the ritual?”
“I think so.”
“What is it? Why don’t you want me to look at it?”
“It’s a story, and it’s not finished yet.”
“A story? Did you write me a romance book?” He nodded, his smile shy. “Let me read what you have.”
“I can’t. I don’t know how it ends yet.”
“Well, maybe I could help.”
He shook his head. “It’s the story of us, Jules.” His voice wavered a little. “Or my version, at least. Let me keep writing, for as long as I can.”
I cocked my head, seeing the intense expression on his face. I understood now the chaotic nature of creating a pack. It brought everyone’s emotions so close to the surface, we all walked around raw and vulnerable. I didn’t want to sit here, pronounce judgement on the complex man I was starting to get to know. I wanted everyone to go away, so I could lie down beside him as he read what he’d written so far. I wanted to bury my face in his hair and smell his scent. I wanted to argue about whether or not a book really was a reverse harem if two men were in love with each other. I wanted to hold his hand and look into his eyes and say nothing at all, until whatever was going on between us had a chance to settle.
Instead, I said, “OK,” and got to my feet. “I accept his offer.”
“You can take some of them up on their offers to have a bit of fun,” Slade said at my shoulder. “You haven’t had the opportunity to run wild, like Lisa has.”
Another hot guy laid himself at my feet, promising me everything in return for some of my time. He was gorgeous, and had this dark smouldering thing going on. When he looked up, his eyes had a twinkle in them that promised to satisfy my deepest, darkest fantasies. I stared into them as he held out his token: a beautifully wrought silver bracelet, but while he was just gorgeous, they all were. I felt strangely numb towards all of these guys. Would I want them in my pack? I didn’t know.
“I can’t accept anyone else’s tokens right now,” I said, watching the man’s face fall as I did so. “Sorry, Ned?”
“Ed,” he corrected me.
“Sorry, Ed. You are beautiful, and maybe something amazing could happen between us. But right now, I think I’m at max, emotionally. I can’t see any of you clearly enough to make a decision whether or not to accept you. Do I need to get through these petitions now?” I looked around to where Kelly stood there stiffly. I forged on nonetheless. “Can I leave it until later, when I’m feeling a bit more clear-headed? I really need some time to adjust to what’s happened today.”
Silence fell over the party. It was only the squeeze of Slade’s hand that stopped me from getting up and retreating inside.
“That’s not normally—” she began.
“I’d be amenable,” one of the matriarchs said. “My Ed is a lovely boy. I
f she needs to take some time to consider him properly, I think it worthwhile.”
“Yes, well, that’s going to mean that—” Kelly said.
“Kelly, with all due respect,” Asher said, “we don’t have enough women to satisfy the men. What was often a temporary thing is now starting to become permanent, as well you know.” I frowned, not sure what that meant, until I saw all eyes slide over to where Jack and Hawk stood. It took a minute for him to realise, so I got to see the transformation of a comfortable Jack—standing there with a beer in his hand and chatting with Hawk and Shaun—to a tense Jack, with his back stiffening, his chin lifting, and his eyes hardening as he noted the attention. I wondered if it was just me that saw his hand slip down into the thin space between him and Hawk, one finger stretching out to make contact with the other man’s thigh.
“Julie, you are in a position of power here,” Asher continued. “What you ask for is not unreasonable, but petitioning cannot become too prolonged. Part of what keeps the peace here is that all men who wish to present themselves get the opportunity to do so. It appears this will be a lengthy process.” Her eyes scanned the group. “I say we halt things for today and meet at Council to discuss how to move forward.”
"Agreed," several of the other matriarchs said, and then it appeared it was all done. I found myself letting out a long breath as people started packing up and readying to head home. Some of the guys looked pissed, but with some cajoling from the others, they retreated, off to petition for another day. Finally, it was just Kelly, Finn, Brandon, Aaron, Slade, his family, and Jack, Hawk, and Shaun, still standing in their little cluster.
Kelly appeared to shake herself, her eyes flashing with irritation, but she eventually nodded and said, "Enjoy your first night with your mate, Julie. We'll talk again, soon. Jack?"
"Just got something to talk through with Julie," he said.
"Come away, Jack. You've meddled enough for today."
He and his guys had drifted closer now that the back yard was almost emptied.
"Yeah, and I say I've still some more to do before the night ends. Leave it, Mother."