by Sam Hall
"Hey."
My head whipped about to see Brandon standing in the doorway.
"Oh my god, how the hell did you get here so quickly?" I said, throwing myself into his arms. When they closed around me, something inside eased a bit. I buried my nose in his neck and breathed in his scent.
"Tried to go to the house, ended up driving the truck at warp speed over to the compound only to find you'd already left. The fellas told me what happened, sort of." He reached up and stroked my cheek. "You gonna be OK with having the black wolf here?"
"Sylvan, his name is Sylvan."
"Right, so you OK?"
We walked together into a nearby room, settled down on the bed, and he cradled me in his arms. I closed my eyes for a second, just feeling the weight of his body, scenting the smell of him around me. It was much more preferable than remembering the attack.
"I don't know. In some ways, it helps he wasn't in human form at the time. It’s like it was someone else, something else that bit me. But, Brandon...it hurt so fucking much. I've never experienced pain like it." I rolled over and looked into those grey eyes. "Now he's my mate, and apparently, I need to sort out my pack ASAP because reasons. It's all a bit much, y'know?"
"Then stay here for a bit. Rest, give yourself time to adjust. From Ophelia's bustling, she's got this."
"I just have to have sex and make mate bonds," I said, my head dropping to his chest as I ran a hand across the soft cotton of his shirt. His hand covered mine, squeezing it for a moment. "Mating for the cause. Fucking for our freedom."
"Is that such a bad way to spend your time?"
I lifted my head to look into his eyes. His tone was light, almost.
"I'd make you my mate right now, if that's what you want. You are already, the bite's just a formality at this point."
"But it’s not, not to us," he said, though I saw the rush of pleasure in his eyes. "Everything happens when it’s supposed to. Don't let this or anything else rush it."
I kissed him then, slowly, quietly, with respect to the mood in the room. It was fragile, we were fragile, so I kissed him like he was made of glass. He warmed quickly, his hands moving restlessly over my back as our lips melted together. For once, he felt so, so soft, like he was something I could fall into and not stop.
"Jules, your stuff is—oh!"
I turned around to see Hawk in the doorway, Buddy wagging at his heels before launching himself at me.
"Hey, crazy pup! Buddy, down, down!" My dog finally settled into a sit beside the bed. I leaned over Brandon to rub the soft fur on his head until he curled up on the carpet. "Come in, Hawk, you don't have to stand there, unless you want to."
"He looks like he's missed you," he said, sitting down on the other side of the bed. The distance between Brandon and I and the other man seemed deliberate. Was it from respect? Was it nerves? I wasn't sure. Hawk was a big lump of mystery to me.
"The dog is obsessed with her," Brandon said. "Doesn't like being more than five feet away from Jules. God help you if you try to shut the door on him. Thankfully, he doesn't stare at your lily-white butt when you're smooching with his mistress."
"Knows his place, does he?" Hawk glanced over the side of the bed, past the two of us to where Buddy lay. He looked a little wistful as he watched the dog settle in for a nice nap.
"And you don't."
"That was very perceptive," Brandon said. I elbowed him in the ribs. "What? It was."
"Yeah, and what's your take on this situation, Doc?" I said.
"You really want that?" His eyes were filled with good humour and something else. It would be easy to describe his intelligence as cool and calculating, but I didn't see it that way. Rather, it seemed very... focussed, and there was a kind of narcissistic thrill to being the subject of his interest.
"You're always free to say what you think."
He chuckled at that. "Yes, but that's not what we're talking about here, is it?" His eyes slid over to Hawk and back. "You want this?"
"Look, mate, I heard you were a bit of a head-fucker, but I think you'll find I'm a pretty straightforward kind of guy," Hawk said, getting to his feet. "I've got more than enough games to deal with on the home front."
"Sit."
Brandon's tone was even and calm—no hint of command—yet Hawk sat down on the end of the bed, looking surprised when he did.
"You two are hovering around each other, being oh so careful. That's an interesting thing to see. I'm not sure if it’s because you're both introverts, or because you're trying to deal with a guy that's less upfront and in your face."
Hawk stared at the two of us, then shook his head. "Trying to be a good bloke here. She's got a lot on her plate, this Sylvan dude, coming to Sanctuary, what happened down at Stores. Even fucking Jack."
"Even fucking Jack," Brandon agreed, but with a whole other emphasis on the words. "How did that feel, watching her fuck your lover?"
"You trying to analyse me?" Those fine dark brows drew down. His hands strayed to his pocket, reaching for a cigarette before he stopped, looking around at the grand alpha's place and reconsidering.
"Nope. Tell me, don't tell me, it’s up to you."
Hawk stared into Brandon's eyes steadily for a moment, before looking away and shaking his head. "You know how I felt. Has to happen to you every day with her mob."
"Maybe I do, maybe I don't. Tell me."
"Tell you what? That it's envy and jealousy and awe all rolled up into one? That they looked so fucking beautiful together, like a pair of savages, tearing at each other until I wasn't sure if they were going to come or if they were gonna feast on the other’s hearts. I've never seen sex look so much like fighting and still be fucking. I hated him, for a moment. Just then, she was mine. For one fucking moment, I had something apart from Jack. Then he barrelled in.”
Hawk’s eyes dropped to the bed.
“He does that, sucks all the oxygen from the room, and I'm there, light-headed and fighting for breath and wanting him all the same. But what a sight it was." Hawk's eyes shifted to meet mine, something that seemed so hard for him to do until now. "You were beautiful, Jules. Like some kind of fucking goddess." He turned to Brandon. "How do you do it, share her with other blokes?"
"Because I love her, not own her." I looked back over my shoulder and saw a startling expression. It was all there, what he thought and felt. Rather than kept locked up behind a wall of rationality, my breath caught in my chest at what I saw. "For some, love is about squirrelling the other person away—to protect, to hold, to love—in a secret space just for the two of you. There's nothing wrong with that, if that's what people want. You fight for your relationship, your exclusivity, with a fierceness that further feeds that bond between you. Me, I hold Jules as lightly as I can, not because I don't care, but because I do, so much. I care enough to want to see her happy, loved, protected. I care enough to know I'm not going to be able to provide everything she needs, and I love her so much I can't bear her to go without it. She's got strong arms to protect her, and people to listen when she needs someone to talk to. She's got blokes who'll fight for her and tell her how it is. But I think what you want to know is about sex."
Hawk's nod was stiff.
"Her pleasure is as much a part of her as anything else. Just as I want to hear about her day or her complaints about what the others are up to right now, I want to hear her sighs and gasps, the hitch of her breath, the moans. When I see her legs wrapped around one of the others, I want to sandwich myself between them so I can experience it all with her. They love her, I love her, and she loves us. That's what matters."
"And others? She adds more to this pack, you're gonna get less time with her."
"That's not what I think about," Brandon answered. "I wonder if they're worthy. So, Hawk, that's my question to you. Are you worthy?"
I didn't give him a chance to answer, turning in Brandon's arms and grabbing his head and pulling it down to mine. The burn of my venom filled my mouth as we kissed, the sensatio
n spreading over his lips and mine, until it almost hurt to kiss. I didn't care though. I felt like I was trying to climb into his mouth in an attempt to get closer to him.
"You've got to let me bite you," I said, pulling away.
"Not yet. Soon, but not yet," Brandon said with a wide smile.
"Slade says you’re always manoeuvring us into place."
"He's right. Can’t help it, but I promise, it'll be better to wait. Now, back to your suitor."
He turned me around gently, shifting so his body was a hard line against my spine. We both noted Hawk’s fingers plucking at the fine fabric of the bedspread, eyes watching his hands sightlessly. I covered his hand with mine, ceasing the picking.
He looked up, meeting my eyes. He felt warm and strong underneath me. My Tirian shifted within me, whuffing curiously, which was interesting in itself. She rarely paid attention to any of them initially.
"I don't know if I'm worthy, Jules. But I want to find out," he said.
Hawk's voice was a ragged growl, something that sent a shiver up my spine. The shirt he was wearing was swiftly unbuttoned and pushed off, revealing those tattoos scrolling across his broad chest. I felt Brandon's mouth on the back of my neck as Hawk came closer, crawling across the bed to me. I shifted, unable to sit still, not sure if I wanted to back off or come closer. He made the decision for me, taking his place lying in front of me.
I reached out and traced a finger along the lines of one of the tattooed wolves. "These are you and Jack." He nodded. "And how does he feel about all of this?"
"I don't know. I never fucking know, and right now, I don't care. He put me in this place, but I've got to know if there's anything there."
He came for me, looming large as I stayed curled within Brandon's body, then his mouth crashed down on mine.
In my mind, I saw his Tirian and mine running along a dark plain as his fingers dug into my hair, as his mouth pressed against mine. They ran in tandem, not too close yet, but still arrowing towards the same point on the horizon. He nipped at my lips, and I felt a thrill as those big square teeth grasped at my flesh, my hand going up into the heavy curtain of his hair. He moaned into my mouth, his tongue sliding into it as my fingers bit down into his scalp.
Brandon's hand snuck around my waist, holding me where I was as Hawk pulled away. He chuckled when my lips followed his, wanting more of that biting pressure.
"You staying for this?" Hawk asked Brandon.
"If you're OK with that. I'm hard as nails over here, listening to the kitten noises you're pulling out of her," he replied.
Hawk smiled at that, drawing me closer so I rested on the length of his forearm lying across the bed. "That's it," Brandon said when Hawk kissed me again, harder, more insistent this time. "Down her neck. She loves that."
Brandon pushed my t-shirt up, rubbing his hand along my stomach where the burn started to build. Hawk's shoulders were heavy with muscle as I clawed at them. The tickling prickle of his beard against my skin had me bucking up underneath him, wanting something harder.
I was panting when he pulled back, and caught his nod to Brandon, the other man swooping in and taking over where he had stopped.
"Doing alright, love?" Brandon asked between little glancing kisses. It was driving me mad. Hawk's lips were trailing down my collarbone, and he pulled the neckline of my shirt back so he could get to more of my skin.
"Yes, now kiss me."
They were the perfect counterpoint: hungry and scratchy and soft and sweet. I felt like I could drown in the sensations their lips wrought. Finally, I pulled away and sat up, the two of them reclining like hungry beasts below me, lips bruised, skin flushed. I scrambled off the bed and shut the door before my hand went to my shirt.
They followed my lead off the bed, boxing me in, one on either side. One set of hands pulled my shirt up off my head, cupping my breasts and forcing the lace to rasp against my nipples for a moment, as another set undid my jeans and pulled them free. Brandon's fingers toyed with the waistband of my knickers as Hawk's played with my breasts. I watched his throat work as he stared, his thumb rubbing against the hard bead of my nipple.
"Sorry," Hawk said, shooting me a quick grin. "Still can't get over these."
"Then try this," Brandon said as he unsnapped my bra. The garment came loose, and I shrugged it off, Hawk's brows creasing and smoothing as my body was revealed.
There's a terrible vulnerability to standing naked in front of a guy you don't know that well, but all the automatic fears that rushed to the surface could have stayed where they were—in the past. Hawk put his hands on me like I was precious, something that had Brandon growling in appreciation. His fingers trailed up and down my sides, my head falling back on Brandon's shoulder as Hawk’s lips closed around my nipples.
I heard Hawk's hum of appreciation through my own 'kitten noises', as Brandon called them. "So sensitive," he said.
"Not that sensitive," I replied. "You can go harder. A bit of bite is real nice." His fingers clamped down, a shot of pleasure-pain rocketing through my body. Gentle strokes were all well and good, but something with an edge to it had my clit sitting up and taking notice.
And so did Hawk. He noted the splay of my thighs, the rasp of my breath, and surged forward. His lips were all over me, one hand still tugging at my nipple and the other sliding into my pants.
We both groaned at what he found there. He slid his fingers through my wetness, meeting no resistance whatsoever. He pulled back for a moment, looking into my eyes and searching them, as if for answers to what he'd found.
"You're so fucking wet."
He said the words like he couldn’t believe he could provoke such a reaction. I smiled and nodded. “Of course, I am.”
"So let’s get these off," Brandon said, reaching down for my underwear.
"You first." I looked at the two of them, both of them wearing considerably more clothes than me. They moved to obey, and I watched Hawk’s naked form emerge. Damn, he was hot. The long fall of dark hair was the only soft thing on him, his body a picture of well-muscled male beauty. I wanted to close the gap between us, trace that vein up and over his hip and see if I could actually wrap my fingers around that thick cock. I heard the sounds of Brandon stripping, my eyes rolling for a second when I felt that warm presence at my back. I reached behind to run my hand down his body, but he grabbed it with his wrist.
"Focus."
I'd obviously seen Hawk before, but my breath still caught in my chest when he stepped free of his clothes. His head jerked up when he heard the sound, and a pleased smile spread across his face. His hand strayed to his cock as his eyes raked down my body, giving it a couple of long slow strokes. I closed the gap between us, placing my hand over his. I wanted to be the one to make the veins stand out starkly along its length. He stared into my eyes as he pulled his fingers away, his lips dropping open slightly the moment my fingers closed around him.
"Jules..." My name was a whisper on the wind as he pulled me hard against him. "Can't do that. Too fucking close. Your body, your scent, it's driving me fucking nuts. I'm only just holding myself back from pushing you down on the bed and shoving myself into you."
I felt a stab of pleasure inside me as I saw just that in my mind.
"Do it."
"Jules..." Brandon said.
I ignored him, staring into the other man's eyes. "Do it."
Right then, that's exactly what I wanted. We didn't have massive amounts of drama in my relationships, communication being key, but sometimes it felt like fucking by committee. Was this OK? Was I OK? I needed to take someone else's cock before Aaron to warm me up, or let the guys give me multiple orgasms and get me relaxed enough it wouldn't hurt. It was safe, sane, and consensual. But right now, I felt a prickle along my spine—part fear, part arousal. What would it be like, to have someone force me down on the bed, hand on the back of my neck as he forced his way inside me?
Hawk's nostrils flared, his eyes hardening as he breathed me in. "Hawk," Brandon
said. I could hear him shifting, but that wasn't where my focus was. Hawk’s hands locked around my arms like twin vices, and I liked the bite. I dimly heard Brandon's complaints as Hawk threw me down on the bed, his body covering mine, hard and heavy. For a moment, the Tirians in my mind came to a stop, green eyes searching each other in the darkness, their backs arching slightly as they each regarded the other. I felt his fingers between my legs as his mouth came down on mine, his tongue going down my throat as they pushed inside me.
His lips dropped to my neck as my back arched at the brutal onslaught, my gasps now free to fill the room as his teeth dug into my neck. He was dragging me higher, my clit throbbing as his thumb rubbed across it in time with his thrusts.
"Oh yeah," I said when Hawk finally pulled away, stroking his cock from where he knelt between my legs.
"Stop!" Brandon snapped. "You're going to hurt her."
"Never," Hawk said chin lifting. I'd not seen many similarities between him and Jack, but I saw it now. "I wore her scent until Jack made me wash my bloody face. I just want another taste."
My head tipped backwards as he slung my legs over his shoulders, tugging me to the edge of the bed. I felt his lips, his beard on my thighs, then my cunt. My head rolled back at the sensation, and I found myself staring at Brandon.
"You can't control everything," I said in a low rumble. "Sex is about losing control sometimes, something you need to do too. Even if he hurts me, I'm stronger than both of you. Stop being afraid for me, and be with me."
Brandon’s eyes held mine for an interminable amount of time. I watched his every reaction as I began to lose it. Hawk ate me like he was starved, burying his face into me and thrusting his tongue deep inside, he sucked on me rhythmically. Brandon seemed to take in every response before leaping across the bed, shoving Hawk backwards and clambering between my legs. "Get up at her head, feed her your cock."