“Thank you, Larin. Tristan, if you will,” he said, nodding at the door. They turned back towards each other, resuming whatever they had been discussing before I had come in. I wondered what it was and stared over my shoulder around the door as it closed behind us.
“Come, my lady,” said Tristan, respectfully. I looked at him sharply.
“Larin,” I said with meaning. Tristan turned and looked at me warmly, then nodded.
“Larin.”
He had risked his life to save me, not once but several times, and he was not even to be considered of a stature less than my own. Not that I had any idea what that meant, yet.
“Tristan,” I said as we walked, “I’m sorry about Iris.”
“So am I,” he said quietly. I sensed something in his tone and looked at him sharply. He looked up quickly, then strode ahead.
“You. . .you love her, don’t you?” I asked, wondering why I hadn’t seen it before. The look she gave him when she was hauled off, the closeness of their relationship.
Tristan looked at me in shock, then in some discomfort.
“Nonsense,” he said. “I merely meant I was saddened that she risked the wrath of the Council with such poorly thought-out actions.” He continued to walk ahead, but I saw something more, redness on the back of his neck.
“I’m sorry, Tristan,” I said softly. “I didn’t mean. . . I don’t mean to pry. It was just an observation.”
Tristan slowed down, sighing. He looked at me with a sideways smile. “Is it really that obvious, then?” I grinned, shaking my head.
“Your secret is safe with me.”
Tristan turned back around, but we were not walking now. He had stopped and crossed his arms. I sensed he wanted to talk, and I knew what it felt like to need a friend, so I listened, saying nothing. “Iris was with Patrick for a long time,” he started slowly. “She loved him very much. I admit, there was something of a. . .past. . .between us. But it’s long been over. She had moved on, and I respected her decision.” He looked at me, and I nodded, encouraging him to continue. “I do not condone what she did, will never do so, but I also know that she is not an evil creature, Larin.
I do not believe she meant real harm, although humiliating another for one’s own satisfaction is still an evil act, and thus she is being rightly punished,” he finished.
I pursed my lips, looking upwards at the sky, and what was shaping up to be another beautiful day. It seemed all days at the Citadel were beautiful, and I saw the light shine down on Tristan’s white head, giving him a specter-like appearance as it reflected off the blackness of his shimmering wings. He looked sad, and I reached out and touched his arm.
“I already spoke to Michael about it, Tristan,” I said quietly. “I asked him to let her off the hook. I’m not angry about what happened, considering she actually helped me find my wings,” I smiled, remembering the first flight, the wonder of the sensations coming back to me in a rush. “In fact, I understand how she was feeling. You’ll recall I lost someone I loved that night too. It really messes you up to watch someone you love die,” I whispered. “And frankly, I don’t believe she meant any real harm. We all make stupid mistakes when we aren’t thinking clearly.”
Tristan looked at me in surprise but quickly collected himself, stealing one more quick glance in my direction, then smiled gratefully.
“You’re a kind soul, Larin, but Iris will face her punishment with acceptance and understanding. Do not fear for her. She will be released soon, once she has had some time to think about her actions. And once she is made an appropriate example of what not to do when young vessels may be watching.” He smiled at me and beckoned me forward.
“Come on,” he said.
I followed along, thinking quietly. I knew how strongly I felt for Michael, how much I wanted to be around him all the time. The thought of him being with another was not a pleasant one. I felt sad for Tristan, imagining him knowing Iris was in love with someone else, and the pain it must have caused him.
“Um,” I said, not sure if I should continue. “Can I ask you a weird question?”
“Of course,” Tristan replied, regarding me with his usual calm persona.
“The Council,” I began, “have they been known to. . .ah. . .” I searched around for the words
“Well. . .” I could see Tristan’s smile even though I was walking behind him.
“All creatures on this earth are capable of love, in some form or another, and some in ways we do not understand,” he said as we continued to make our way along the path. I blushed, knowing he understood what I was getting at, but had answered me in a vague way nonetheless. I wondered if I should push further, and I decided to risk it.
“Have they. . .loved others, then?” I asked. Tristan turned and gave me a look that told me he would answer the question if he could, if he felt it was his place. I left it, then, respecting his discretion. He was a faithful vessel, and I appreciated that.
“There is a very sad story, a legend that happened long before even my time. It has been twisted into various mythologies throughout the ages, but I find something very compelling about the one we tell here. An archangel, a fearsome warrior, fell in love with a human man. It was previously unheard of. But they loved each other greatly,” Tristan said softly. “Her name was Lilith, and her husband, the human, was named Adam.”
“What happened to them?” I asked, dreading the answer.
“He died. When the Disc was used to steal the immortality of Man. During the great war, he was one of the first casualties. Lucifer despised their relationship, despised her for loving one of the creatures he so hated. He instructed Azrael to seek him out and kill him. The legend goes on to say that she found him, laying dead among the rocks by the cliffs of the mountain near his village. In her grief she fell upon him, weeping. Inconsolable, she threw herself from the cliffs in order to join with him in death, knowing she was unable to be without him in life. Eden itself seemed to weep for her demise, transforming her body to stone and shrouding her in a veil of yellow flowers.”
I felt my lip tremble, frowning deeply. “That’s a terribly sad story. Is it true?”
“Who is to say?” Tristan shrugged. “The Council angels you know are the only archangels that found themselves trapped on earth after the completion of the Fall. She may very well be in the Celestial Kingdom. I find myself hoping she found him there, in the end, and that they now dwell together having found peace in the Father’s presence.”
I raised my eyebrows, surprised.
“I didn’t take you for a romantic,” I said, smiling despite the sadness I felt from hearing the tragic tale. Tristan gave me a small, sideways smile, and said nothing more as we continued down the path.
I came up short, suddenly remembering something. “Chase!” I cried, and Tristan turned to look at me. “What happened to him last night? Where is he?” Tristan turned back and continued walking.
“I expect you’ll see him about, and no -” he said smiling at me, “he was not reprimanded for his. . .passionate outburst. I spoke with Michael afterwards, and I believe it was understood that he was concerned and shaken from what happened in the meadow. No harm was done,” he finished, and I heaved a huge sigh of relief. I would have felt terribly guilty had he gotten into trouble because of me. I smiled gratefully at Tristan. I also hoped that I could count him among my friends as time passed.
“It was very nice to chat, Larin,” Tristan said kindly. I nodded at him, returning his smile again, and we arrived at the ridge overlooking the training grounds. I sighed, knowing I couldn’t put it off any longer.
Josef looked up at us as we arrived. He oversaw the new recruits, and the same group who were there yesterday were practicing their defensive stances, moving in unison as Josef called out instructions. He continued to call out to the trainees, nodding at us and keeping his hands behind his back as he turned and walked up and down the line of young vessels as they drilled. It didn’t last long though. Just as I feared, al
l the faces eventually turned towards me as word spread of my arrival. I took a shuddering breath, marshalling my strength and walking forward. I saw Chase nearby sitting on a boulder with a longsword in his hand. He was looking down, oblivious to the commotion. I frowned, noticing that his face was drawn and tired looking. I immediately felt concerned and strode through the crowd towards him. As I approached, he looked up dully before meeting my eyes, then rose slowly to his feet, staring at me.
I paused, confused. This was not the Chase I knew. I had fully expected him to rush over to greet me in his warm, cheerful fashion.
“Chase!” I said as I neared him. “Chase! Are you. . .are you okay?”
He walked toward me, and I saw his eyes were red from exhaustion and emotion.
“Chase, my god! Are you okay?” I asked again. He was looking me over from head to toe and shaking his head in disbelief. I reached out to him, not knowing what to do, and wanting to touch him – to shake him out of whatever was happening to him. Just as the thought occurred though, he suddenly leapt forward, wrapping his arms around me and leaning his head down into my shoulder. I felt him shudder, and I knew he was holding back tears. I grasped him firmly, rubbing his back and finding myself shushing him as I would a small child I was trying to comfort.
“I was so. . .I was so worried, Lar,” he said, holding me tightly. “I was so worried.”
“I know,” I whispered, leaning my face against his chest. I continued to murmur soothing sounds, then looked up in his face. “I’m sorry I scared you.”
“You have no idea. . . what happened. . .do you? You don’t,” he said. It was a statement.
And it was true, I don’t remember much but my vision and winding up in the middle of the meadow.
“Not really,” I replied into his robes. They were soft and fresh, and he had a clean, healthy smell about him. I had a moment of amusement at the knowledge that even his smell became him perfectly. I went to let go, to look him in the face, but he held me tighter, whispering in my ear.
“I don’t want the others to hear. I don’t want them to gossip about you anymore,” he said quietly. “But it was the freakiest thing I’ve ever seen. One moment you were standing there, the next you were speaking in a different language, but it was only the same word you said, over and over again. You just kept walking straight. I couldn’t stop you or distract you. I screamed for help, you just looked so out of it. It wasn’t you,” he rushed. “I really thought you were gone - you know. . . gone. Then Michael and the others came.” I felt the force of his anger and I was surprised, finding it difficult to imagine Chase ever being hostile about anything.
“Chase, it’s over now, and I’m fine. I’m. . . you’re a great. . .friend,” I finished, looking at him meaningfully. He stared unhappily back into my eyes. He wanted more. I tried to convey with my expression the extent of my feelings for him. That I cared – perhaps even very deeply, but not in the way he wanted me to. I could never care for anyone or anything the way I cared about Michael. I felt it in my soul just as surely as I felt my pulse speed up thinking about him.
Chase took a deep breath, but I could already see the denial in his eyes. He shook it off, letting me go reluctantly, but not before we had managed to attract an enormous crowd, all whispering to each other and gaping at us. Or more specifically, gaping at me. I supposed I couldn’t blame them after last night. I looked up at the ridge and snapped my head back in a double take.
Michael was standing in the ridge, having just observed me embracing Chase for longer than just a moment, and I hoped he didn’t think – well, he couldn’t think that. He knew where my heart belonged. Just as suddenly, he jumped into the air, and hovered above us momentarily, waiting for the crowd to give him enough room to land. He did so, striding toward me and looking at Chase. Chase glared back at him angrily. With true hostility. It was so shocking, I didn’t know what to do.
Michael eyed him benignly for a moment, then approached him.
“We must not speak here. Follow us.” He took my hand, and I looked back at Chase apologetically. He leapt into the air, and I closed my eyes, begging my wings to follow suit and obey. They did, with a little help from Michael, but I ignored that fact. Chase followed, and we circled back a short distance to Josef.
“Josef!” called Michael, “to us! Bring your sword. And two more for these two,” he gestured to Chase and me. Michael had still not met my eyes after finding me with Chase. I felt suddenly nervous, wondering if Chase was about to be run through with one of the swords.
We flew some distance away, to a small clearing further into the valley. As we landed, Michael turned around, and finally faced me. He smiled at me peacefully, with a look of tenderness in his eyes. I let out a massive sigh of relief. He wasn’t angry. I smiled at him and felt the blood rush to my cheeks, wanting to leap back into his arms, but resisting.
“That environment,” Michael said, gesturing over his shoulder toward the training grounds, “will not be conducive to your learning how to fight properly. It is essential that you learn, and that you learn quickly. You are our greatest possession at this moment, and you must be able to rely not only on your wits but on your ability to wield a sword.” I nodded, my mouth slightly open, worried for a moment he would lunge at me with a sword as he did yesterday. He smiled and turned to Josef.
“Josef and Chase, you will assist me in teaching Larin how to fight.”
Chase looked at him grudgingly, his anger from last night still apparent, but he nodded. Josef handed him a sword, and me as well. I put my hand around the hilt, nearly dropping it, surprised by the heaviness.
We spent the afternoon practicing everything from defence to basic swordfight techniques.
“Your left foot leads!” barked Josef at one point in professional tones. “It is the leading foot! Keep your right foot behind you, and your body weight evenly distributed. It is sometimes difficult to ensure balance when getting used to your wings, but can be mastered with practice.” I found I was grinning. By now, I felt as though my wings were as normal and natural as my fingertips. I shifted easily, managing the position he demonstrated without issue. Josef appeared impressed and complimented me briefly.
“Keep your hips facing your opponent. The most essential thing to keep in mind is to protect your head, always. Keep your sword at shoulder level. When you move it, you move it in a fluid-like fashion. Imagine your sword as a piece of your body, it can respond to your commands just as your hand responds to commands from your mind.” I nodded. “Bring your sword forward and close the line between yourself and your opponent. Always look at their eyes, as the eyes will tell you their plan before their body responds. This prepares you for their counter attack. And do not ever doubt it, there will always be a counterattack.”
He continued to instruct me, Michael watching, sometimes participating by stepping in to move my hands over the hilt correctly, to turn my hips, to adjust my body. I knew he was not only taking a professional interest, but using it as an excuse to touch me, and I nearly dropped the sword occasionally as his hands. . .I gulped and tried to concentrate on the large, sharp object in my hands as opposed to the large, soft object behind me. I felt goosebumps rise on my arms, giving him a look of warning. He merely smiled in response.
Chase either chose not to notice our closeness or was too distracted by his tiredness and his attempts to focus on the task at hand. I knew if he looked closely, my face would betray my emotions, and where my focus largely lay. As it was, Chase bravely assisted, helping me to practice my lunges, guarding and blocking. Tristan had arrived, maintaining a respectful distance but interjecting some piece of advice occasionally.
After several hours, I realized I had quite enjoyed myself. All my self-consciousness had disappeared as we worked together, and I felt I understood the instructions. I had very much work to do, and I was nowhere near getting into any battles soon, but I felt much better that I had at least overcome my fear of failure or humiliation, that I had given it my all
. In time, I hoped I’d get better. Michael sheathed his sword and walked over to me, taking both of my hands and smiling into my eyes. I’m proud of you, his said. I couldn’t help myself, and stood forward onto the tips of my toes, ignoring our audience. Michael stiffened momentarily given the others around us, but I could feel his internal shrug, knowing there was no sense pretending anymore. He smiled and leaned down to give me a quick, but gentle kiss on the lips. We pulled away, but Michael held my hand up to his mouth, kissing it sweetly, smiling as he did so. We turned to leave, and suddenly I remembered.
I looked over to my left and saw Chase there, staring at me with his mouth open. He looked so hurt. I frowned at him, letting go of Michael’s hand and walked toward Chase, however, he turned on his heel and took off before I could stop him.
“Chase!” I cried, but he was gone. I sighed. Michael walked over to me and put his hand on my shoulder, giving it a squeeze. I turned and looked at Tristan, but he had his usual passive, quiet expression. He nodded at me and smiled.
“You have done exceptionally well, Larin,” said Josef, smiling. “I feel you will learn much with the others. I ask that you join the rest tomorrow, and we will ensure you are left to learn your skills without curious eyes upon you.” He looked at Michael, who nodded.
“Tristan, you will see to it,” he said, and Tristan nodded.
“Of course, my Lord Michael,” he said.
“Let us go back and see what remains of the day at the Citadel halls,” Michael smiled, and we all took off together.
* * * * *
There was much activity when we arrived. I was immediately accosted by well-wishers, glory-seekers, and those who were simply curious. I walked through the doors with some difficulty, and instinctively grasped Michael’s hand.
“Continue about your business,” Michael said loudly enough for the chattering to stop. The vessels reluctantly obeyed the instruction and dispersed from the hall. When we were nearly alone, Michael couldn’t resist turning to me. He looked at me tenderly, brushing a strand of hair from my face. “We are calling an assembly in the morning – it will put the minds of all at ease to know of a public declaration. You needn’t fear, I will be at your side.” I gulped but nodded. We turned together to walk forward, when we both noticed Uriel standing a short distance ahead, his face rigid with shock. He had watched us. It was not a secret that Michael and I had developed feelings for each other, but Uriel evidently hadn’t come to that conclusion.
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