Zombie Holiday

by C.G. Banks

in the world crunching down on those few Live-ers and let me tell you, it was not a pretty scene. People, live and dead, started getting tossed around and the blood began to flow. Pack madness. I got knocked down on my knees in the rush and it felt like a herd of cattle stompin a mudhole in my ass. It took me a while to get back on my feet and when I did it was chaos. I saw an arm flying through the air and a naked woman being ripped to pieces. I guess the Red Eyes had stripped the captives to make it easier on the teeth because it was a blood-splash event. Even ripped apart the Live-ers blood was still hot and this brought everything to a boil.

  Deaders started turning on Deaders. Ripping and tearing on rotten flesh, blood droplets coming down from above like rain. At one point I looked down and some somebitch had most of my foot in its mouth and was just about to leave me a little shy of a coupla digits, but I clubbed that bastard across the face with an arm I found myself holding and then I just went shit-city on everything around me.

  I was never good with crowds in the old days, and like they say, old dogs ain’t much for new tricks.

  I went to hollering and yelling like the devil with his ass in a crack and after what seemed like forever managed to work myself up against one of them barrels. I noticed it didn’t have a top and I slid inside like an earthworm heading home. Well those motherfuckers banged and rattled against that barrel for forty forevers and when things finally died down I was still hunkered down, afraid to peek outside. I let another little while pass and then worked up the courage to poke my head out.

  Blood and body parts were laying around everywhere and about half of the pieces looked as old as yesterday’s news. As I said, when the frenzy hits you just better duck your fucking head and make for the nearest exit.

  I crawled out and stood up. Mudheads and Red Eyes were milling about, covered in blood and muck but at least the craziness had stopped. There wasn’t sign one of the Live-ers who’d been up on that stage though. But to give credit where credit is due, they didn’t have to worry about living the rest of their existence as one of us because there wasn’t a scrap to be seen. They musta all been in pieces scattered around the Pearly Gates right about then.

  Well, I thought, enough is enough. The only thought in my head was to put as many miles between these lunatics as I could but something held me back. To this day I just wish I’d’a gone on and got the fuck outta there. But I didn’t. I stayed. Milled around like the rest of em, like I was looking for shit I lost in the dust. But there was something still itching me at the back of my mind.

  Didn’t take long to figure out what it was.

  You see, this compound did have a couple of buildings. One of them was burning as I left the barrel and it was interesting to watch one of the arc-light towers cook until it got weak and tilted over a bit before going completely over and taking out a whole group of mudheads. But me being me, I kept an eye out for the Red Eyes. This whole thing, whatever it was, was their doing, and I couldn’t for the life of me figure out why all the energy they’d spent had any purpose at all. But again, I’d been in contact with this bunch for longer than I wanted to figure and there was still that curiosity thing that was eating me from the inside out.

  I figured what harm could it do?

  Stupid motherfucker, that’s what I am.

  Regardless of the truth I figured I was one of the bright bulbs in the carton. I’d just continue with the seemingly aimless bullshit until I’d satisfied myself that I’d seen all there was to see. And then I’d be on my merry way. Like I said, a stupid motherfucker.

  The building that wasn’t burning just seemed to call my name, whatever it’d been. The wanderin mudheads and fuckin Red Eyes I’d seen plenty of and wasn’t overly interested in, and there really wasn’t much else out here in the open. There were still a few mudheads finishing up their desserts but aside from that the action was about done. And when I figured on this a little harder something finally stuck in the shit I got left for brains. There weren’t no Red Eyes. Before all hell had broke loose there musta been at least twenty or thirty of those motherfuckers that I picked out in the crowd. And now? I looked here and there, shuffled over to another spot. Tried that angle. Not a motherfucking one. Even in the daylight those eyes shine like a sniper laying doom down on ya.

  Lucky for me, I thought, there were still so many mudheads walking around that one with purpose, even if it weren’t much of a purpose, wouldn’t be enough to turn any heads. Or any mudheads that is. It was those goddamn Red Eyes I was watching out for. But again, I wasn’t really scared. Like I said, I was kinda beyond all that now. Anyway, I made my way over to the closest building, shouldering and pushing mudheads outta the way as I come on. Wasn’t long before I was standing before the door. Closed tight. No blood on it, no dents or cracks, just a door. And here I was standing in a crowd of hundreds of these smelly motherfuckers and not one of em had got at it yet. Well that was something.

  I grabbed the knob and twisted it back. It wasn’t locked and I slid inside and found myself in what amounted to a dark warehouse. I closed the door behind me just to make sure no fucking mudhead got the idea to wade in behind me because it’s kinda like a floodgate. By the time the sun went down every one of those somebitches would be wandering around in here in the dark looking for people to eat. That’s just the fact of the matter.

  From what I could see the place looked empty which I thought was strange, but it didn’t take long for that idea to leap into the backseat. It wasn’t empty at all. Stuffed way back in the darkness, was Live-ers, every one of those poor bastards with rags tied over their mouths so they couldn’t scream. Musta been fifty or more. All tied together with ropes and chains and bolted to the wall or floor. They all looked as terrified as the ones who’d become ghoul soup earlier in the day. But not one of em was making any noise. They knew what was walking around outside and they damn sure didn’t want them in here.

  But here I was.

  I shuffled up and watched the Live-ers go back. There was terror in their eyes and I just stood there staring. Thinking about what I used to be. Thinking about what I was now. I tell ya, if I coulda cried anything like real tears I’d’a been about three years old right then. But I was a man, or at least I used to be, and zombie or not there were certain things I just couldn’t sit back and let go.

  I looked around the mostly empty warehouse. And that’s when I saw it. A truck sitting over near the back wall. It looked like the tires all had air too. And I thought no, there ain’t no way. But I shuffled over and peered through the side window. It was dark inside and I couldn’t make out anything really. I tried the door and it was unlocked. I pulled it open and craned around to the steering column. The keys were dangling from the ignition. Sonofabitch. Now the ball was really in my court.

  I got back out of the truck and looked over to where all the Live-ers were. Made my decision. Went a little quicker over to where they were chained to the wall and floor. They were still shit-scared and backed away like the plague was approaching. Which, in a way, I guess it was.

  And then I saw her.

  A little girl, couldn’tna been more than four or five years old. Chained to the floor like the rest. For just a moment I thought back to the old days. Thought about kids waiting for the school bus to pick em up. Thought about birthday parties and Christmas presents. Everything in my head just seemed to come to a full stop. What was I gonna do now that everything was over? Just wander around for God knows how long in a daze? Or do at least one thing that could still be considered good?

  Without another thought I walked over to the girl and grabbed the chain that was clamped around her tiny arm. And then I pulled that fucker right outta the floor. She was tired, exhausted really. Probably hadn’t eaten anything in days. I could feel her hot blood flowing through her veins and it got that goddamn bone itching in the back of my throat. What are you gonna do, motherfucker?

  She was too weak to resist. I just picked her up and clutched her to my chest. Turned back around. It was a small pic
k-up and there were way too many Live-ers here for me to make much difference. But as they say, sometimes a dab will do ya. She didn’t even squirm as I made my way back to the truck, expecting any minute for the door I came in to bust open and a buncha Red Eyes to come barreling in. But at that moment I didn’t care.

  When I got to the truck I opened the door and gently placed her inside. She made these little tiny noises at the back of her throat as I got in and sat down. This was how this shit was gonna go down.

  I turned the key in the ignition and the truck started up. Like it had been written somewhere ages before. Luckily it wasn’t a stick-shift which I’d been too lazy to ever learn how to work. The truck felt like it had been waiting for me back here in the darkness, counting minutes until I arrived. Well here I was.

  I dropped the gearshift into Drive. Pressed my foot to the gas and went roaring across the floor. And none too soon it seemed because as I went railing past the rest of the ones bolted to the floor the door did come open and about five Red Eyes were right there. I took those fuckers and the door, some of the wall, out at about forty miles an hour and then I was outside, slinging dirt every which way.

  Mudheads started going down