CHAPTER FIVE
Brian left a few minutes later, after promising to keep me posted on any new details with the robbery. He seemed suddenly cold and distant, and I wondered if he felt like he'd intruded on an intimate moment between Mike and me. I'd been so concerned about my husband's welfare that I hadn't even asked about him and Ally. It was probably better to stay out of their business anyhow.
I'd gone back to the waiting room to sit with my family so that the nurse could check Mike's vitals and get him ready for the move to the ICU. It was after midnight, and everyone looked exhausted. I begged Gianna to go home with Johnny. She'd been hesitant at first, but then finally relented.
"What about you?" Gianna asked as she pulled me into a hug. "Are you staying here tonight?"
I nodded. "The nurse said I can stay in Mike's room. They promised to come and get me once he's all settled in the ICU."
"Sal." Johnny gave me a kiss on the cheek. "Can we get you anything before we go? I know the cafeteria here is closed, but I can run down the street and grab you a coffee. There's a mini-mart open until one. Or how about something to eat?"
I shuddered at the word mini-mart. "Thanks, Johnny, but I'll be okay. I can't even stomach the thought of food right now."
"Cara mia, you must eat," Grandma Rosa said sharply. "You cannot get sick as well. I will be back in the morning and bring you both something special for breakfast."
"Thanks, Grandma." She knew that I never had an appetite when I was worried or upset. I was beyond thankful that Mike was out of immediate danger, but other concerns had already started to crowd my brain. I tried to tell myself that they weren't important, but they must be dealt with. Mike was under my health insurance provider. We were the only two on it since Josie had coverage through her husband's employer. The monthly premium was a small fortune to maintain, and it had a high deductible. I wasn't even sure how much of the claim they would cover, but I knew it wasn't higher than 80 percent.
With Mike out of work for several weeks, it was going to be tough for us to manage. Business at the bakery had been up and down as of late. Thank goodness I had some savings and knew Mike had a decent amount in his business account as well. We'd discovered long ago that you had to put money aside when business was going well and when it wasn't. Our work would never be a steady, 365-days-of-the-year thing.
I swallowed hard, hating to ask for help. "Grandma, there's no way I can go to the bakery tomorrow. I don't want to bother you, but—" I stopped abruptly. "I can't put all of this on Josie's shoulders. Is there any way—"
"Of course," she interrupted. "I will be glad to help."
"No," Gianna broke in. "I'm officially on maternity leave as of today. I can help Josie."
Johnny shook his head. "No, sweetheart. You should stay off your feet until the baby comes. I won't have you carrying those heavy trays around."
"He's right," I agreed.
Gianna gave her fiancé a scornful look. "I'll sit down when I get tired. At least I can wait on customers for Josie and answer the phone. It will be fun. Plus I'm really craving cookies these days."
My father, who had been silent up to this point, gave a hearty laugh. "From the looks of you, my sweet girl, you're craving everything these days." He turned to my mother for confirmation. "Isn't that right, Maria?"
Ouch. Bad choice of words, Dad. Gianna had always been slender and was self-conscious about her weight these days. I watched her lower lip quiver for a second while Johnny gave my father a murderous glance. Last I'd heard, she'd gained sixty pounds during her pregnancy, which was too much for one baby. Still, my father needed to learn to think before he spoke. In his sixty-seven years on this earth, he'd never learned to do that and probably wouldn't anytime soon.
My mother came forward and put an arm around my shoulders as she addressed Gianna. Her long dark hair brushed against the side of my face. For as long as I could remember, Maria Muccio had had a perfect, size-four figure and gorgeous face to match, even now at the age of fifty-four.
"Gianna, your father is only kidding." My mother frowned at him, something she rarely did, and then turned to me. "We're going to leave, sweetheart, but call if you need anything. What about Spike?"
Oh crap. I'd forgotten about our poor dog. He had a doggie door in the kitchen, which led to a small, fenced-in yard, but I couldn't leave him alone all day and night. I rubbed my eyes wearily. "I fed him earlier tonight but don't know what time I'll be going home tomorrow. You're allergic to dogs, though. Maybe I—"
"We'll stop and pick him up," Johnny volunteered. "Spike can stay with us. He'll be good company for Dante." Dante was a beagle-mix puppy that he and Gianna had adopted a few months ago. In fact, Dante and Spike had had a play date together last week. Despite his age, Spike tolerated the puppy well.
After Johnny and Gianna had left, my grandmother turned to me, her eyes anxious. "Cara mia, you cannot stay here around the clock. You will need your strength for when Mike comes home. I will plan on being here for a few hours so that you can go home and get some rest."
"I can come too," Mom volunteered, but I noted the somewhat panicked look in her eyes. My mother hated hospitals, and so did my father. They loved Mike as a son—there was no doubt in my mind about that. They didn't do well with blood, needles, and other realities of life. I'd always hated hospitals myself but had been admitted so many times in the past few years that I'd learned how to deal with my phobia. My parents were different from most people's parents, though. Life was always a party, and that did not involve sickness in any way.
"It's not necessary, Mom." I noticed how her expression immediately changed to one of relief. Then I squeezed my grandmother's hand. "You don't have to come either."
"I know I do not," she said. "But I am coming anyway. Now are you sure you do not want me to stay here with you tonight?"
"No, but thanks." I gave all of them a kiss and clung to my grandmother for a few extra seconds. "I'm fine. I only want to be with Mike."
She nodded gravely. "I understand, cara mia. Try to rest if you can. I will be here at nine o'clock. Remember the saying. Things always look lighter in the morning."
"I think you mean brighter, Grandma."
"That is good too."
When they opened the door to leave, Brian was standing there, cell phone pressed against his ear. I was surprised to see him back. My parents and Grandma Rosa nodded to him. He put the phone away and started toward me. I noticed my grandmother raise one eyebrow in my direction as she shut the door.
Brian handed me a bottle of water. "Sorry, the cafeteria's closed, but I can try to find another place if you really need a caffeine fix."
I removed the cap and guzzled half the bottle down in one gulp. "This is fine. I hadn't realized how thirsty I was—thanks."
He shot me a worried look. "You look exhausted, Sally."
"You don't exactly look rested either." I finished off the drink.
Brian smiled. "Yeah, but that's an on-the-job hazard for me. Do you need a ride home?"
I shook my head. "Thanks, but my car's in the lot. I'm staying here tonight anyway."
His face flushed, and he looked away. "Oh, right. I should have guessed that. Uh—I'm glad Mike's okay, Sally. Really, I am. He was very lucky."
Unlike Trevor. Brian didn't say the words, but he didn't have to. I sighed. "I appreciate all you've done." He continued to stand there, and I sensed there was another matter on his mind. "Did you want to talk to me about something? Do you have more details on the robbery?"
He sat down next to me. "We located Trevor's girlfriend, Tina Landon, and gave her the news. Adam and I went over together to their apartment. Tina took it pretty hard. We stayed with her until her girlfriend got there. Tina also told us where to find his ex-wife, Erica. Adam and I went to see her as well, but a neighbor said she's been out of town for the last couple of days. We're going to try again tomorrow."
His news surprised me. "I didn't know that Trevor's ex-wife was local. Mike said that T
revor moved here last summer. That was when he answered Mike's ad in the paper for help. He was new to the area and desperately needed the job."
"Did he tell Mike where he moved here from?" Brian asked.
I paused to think. "Maybe Virginia? I can't remember." Then I noticed the grave look on Brian's face. "Is there something else you're not telling me?"
He turned towards me until his knee was touching mine. "Sally, I have a strange feeling about this. From what Mike told us earlier, and everything the cashier relayed to Adam, it makes me think that this robbery might not have been just a robbery." He blew out a breath. "I wonder if it might have been staged to take Trevor out."
My blood ran cold. "You mean the gunmen were acting out a performance?"
He nodded. "I ran a check on Trevor but didn't find any arrest records. Still, it's possible that he might have been involved on some level with these guys. Maybe he had an item of value that belonged to them. Or he was fooling around with one of their girlfriends, I don't know. Without knowing exactly who these guys are, it's going to be difficult to figure out the motive." He ran a hand over his unshaven chin. "I'd like to talk to Mike again tomorrow, after he's gotten some rest."
"I'm sure that won't be a problem."
"You should get some rest too." His voice became husky as he placed his hand on top of mine, and I immediately stiffened. The color rose in his cheeks and he drew his hand away. "Sorry."
Since the situation was already awkward, I decided to go for broke. "Is everything okay between you and Ally?"
That got a slight smile out of him. "Things are never okay between Ally and me. You, of all people, should know that."
What was that supposed to mean? "I don't understand."
He reached over and tucked a stray curl behind my ear before I could stop him, and his finger brushed against my cheek. "Brian, please, don't—"
"Sally, I'm thinking about going back to Boston."
"For a visit?" Brian had transferred to the Colwestern force from Boston almost three years ago, shortly before I'd returned to town after my divorce. All of Brian's family still lived there, including his father, a retired chief of police. I'd never met his family, but they seemed like a close bunch. I assumed that his father becoming a cop had led to the career choice for him.
"No," he said quietly. "I'm thinking about going back there to live—permanently. My father still has ties to the department, and one of the detectives is planning to retire next year. I've already taken the exam and did well. Dad thinks there's a great chance I could have the position. Until that happens, I could serve as a cop on their force."
"Oh." I hated to see him leave Colwestern but didn't say so. Brian was more than just a police confidant who had helped me out of some scrapes in the past. He'd become a good friend—someone whose opinion I valued—and he was easy to talk to. Mike had been jealous of him in the beginning, knowing that Brian was interested in me romantically, but eased up once we'd confessed our love for one another. Mike knew that he could trust me, and I had no interest in any other man.
"Well, if you think it's best for your career, then I'm happy for you," I said carefully. "Of course, I'm sorry for all of us, though. When will you and Ally be leaving?"
He stared into my eyes for a long time before he answered, the gaze so intense that my face started to heat from the contact. "Ally won't be going with me. I—I'm planning to break up with her before I leave."
This was worse than I'd expected. "Brian, it's none of my business what's happening between the two of you, but I hope that the incident earlier tonight didn't make her worried that—" I stopped, fully aware of the green eyes with golden flecks that were pinned on mine. "I wouldn't want her to think that there was something going on between the two of us."
He laughed then—a bitter, sarcastic sound that left my insides hollow. I'd never seen him react this way before. Sure, steam poured out of his ears when I tampered with an investigation or questioned a suspect he'd warned me to stay away from, but this was different.
Brian rose and stood in front of the window, staring out into the semidarkened parking lot, hands perched on his slim hips. The snow had finally stopped, and it looked picturesque outside, like a winter wonderland. He waited a few seconds before he spoke again. "Of course it's you, Sally. It's always been you. But don't worry. Ally doesn't blame you for any of this—not like she did before. She knows that you're in love with your husband." His voice was barely audible now. "Ally knows you're in love with Mike and he with you." He lowered his tone, and I barely caught the next words. "And she probably knows that I love you too."
Sickening dread swept through me. "Brian, please don't—"
"No," he interrupted and turned around to face me. "It's not fair to do this to you now, after everything you've been through tonight, but I can't help myself."
Uneasily, I glanced around the room. We were alone—even the nurse behind the receptionist counter had disappeared. With resignation, I gripped the sides of my chair for support. "Say what you have to, then."
Brian walked toward me, his Greek god-like face stricken with visible grief. He knelt next to my chair. "I've loved you since the first day I saw you in the bakery." A smile formed on his lips, as if he was replaying the memory in his head. "I remember how your dark eyes were shining with happiness as you waited on customers and those gorgeous curls bounced on your shoulders. How you spoke so sweetly to everyone, even the customers who were rude. I've tried to forget about you—God, how I've tried! But it's as if fate always draws me back to you, like when you get involved in the middle of a murder for what—oh, I don't know, the hundredth time? I feel like someone's trapped me in a version of Groundhog Day." He stared down at the floor, his breathing becoming rapid and loud. "There's no way out for me."
If I'd thought it wasn't possible to feel any worse than I already did, Brian had proved me wrong. Without meaning to, I was ruining his life. I put my face in my hands and refused to look at him.
"Don't cry, Sally. I can't bear it." When I uncovered my eyes, he had already risen to his feet and was facing the window again. "I have a confession to make."
My shoulders slumped forward heavily. Hadn't he just made one? I didn't know how much more I could handle tonight. "What is it?"
Brian's voice was barely above a whisper. "Please don't hate me, but for a brief second tonight—when we saw Mike's jacket under the tarp, I—"
He didn't finish. There was no need to. I knew what he was going to say, and it sent a wave of shock ricocheting through my body. "You thought that if Mike had—I mean, was gone, you might have a chance with me."
He turned around to meet my eyes but made no attempt to approach me this time. "I'm sorry. It's sick, I know. I don't want anything to happen to your husband, I swear. Mike's a good guy, and I like him. Really, I do. When I saw how broken up you were earlier at the market—when you thought he'd died—and then when you sat next to his bed and kissed his hands…" His voice trembled, and he forced a laugh to the surface. "Boy, what a schmuck I am. I never realized how much you loved him before tonight. Or maybe I just didn't want to."
"It's okay," I said dully, but knew it never would be between us again.
"No, I've been fooling myself," he admitted and stared down at his hands. "I can't live like this anymore. I can't even have a normal relationship with another woman. Every time I'm with Ally, I see your face."
The words froze me into shock. Brian had bared his soul to me, and I didn't want this burden on my shoulders. "I've never led you on." With great effort, I tried to keep my voice calm. "You know that I've always loved Mike. Even when I was married to Colin—"
"Damn it, Sally, I'm aware of all this. Don't you get it? That's why I have to go away. I can't be around you anymore. I thought it would get better after a while, but now I know it never will." His eyes had dulled and become watery. "I'll never get you out of my heart."
My stomach filled with dread. What could I possibly say to that? He already k
new how I felt. Mercifully the awkward moment was interrupted by Sonya reappearing.
"Mrs. Donovan? Your husband's all settled in ICU on the second floor," she said cheerily. "You don't have to call on the phone when you get up there. Another nurse will be waiting to take you back."
"Thank you." I hoisted my purse over my shoulder while Brian walked with me to the door. We stood there in uncomfortable silence, waiting for the other person to speak.
Brian went first. "Give Mike my best, okay? I'll stop by tomorrow to talk with him further. Probably early afternoon." He cleared his throat. "I figured you'd want to know, in case you'd rather not be here at the same time."
My brain was a mass of jumbled confusion while every other part of my body ached from weariness and the ordeal of tonight. How had everything gone so wrong so quickly? There was nothing I could say to make it right between the two of us—perhaps ever again. "Brian, I'm so sorry. For everything."
Brian stood in the doorway and gave me a small sad smile that tugged at my heart. "Don't worry, Sally. I promise to never mention this again, and I'm a man of my word. Thanks for listening."
He let the door close quietly behind him.
CHAPTER SIX
"Princess."
"Hmm?" I turned on my side but couldn't manage to get comfortable. I tried to stretch out, but there was no room. Boy, we needed a new mattress.
"Your grandma's here." Mike's voice was raspy and sounded far away.
Why was my grandmother in our bedroom? And why did the room smell so funny? Slowly I opened my eyes. Mike was lying in a hospital bed with a sling on his right arm and looked pale and tired. Everything came back to me in a rush as I quickly uncurled myself from the fetal position in the chair.
Grandma Rosa was standing at the opposite side of Mike's bed, unpacking a bag of goodies. She offered me a cup of coffee and a croissant, but I shook my head.
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