I sucked in a shaky breath. “We didn’t want the same things.”
Cale took a step closer to me. “Is that right? What did he want?”
I looked Cale in the eyes. “He wanted me to look at him…like I look at you.”
Cale’s green eyes widened as he stopped in front of me. He placed his finger on my chin and lifted my face to his. He leaned down and got closer to my lips. “Why do you look at me differently, Maddie?”
I moaned a little, knowing his lips were mere inches from mine. I’d never, in all my life, wanted to be kissed as much as I wanted to be kissed in this moment, by this man I loved with all my heart.
“I look at you differently because…” My eyes searched his face like I was trying to memorize it. I stared at his mouth and I ran my tongue across my bottom lip. Finally, I looked into his eyes and smiled. “Because I love you.”
Cale closed his eyes and whispered, “Finally.” When he opened them, he pulled me closer and was about to kiss me when Lily began crying.
I let out a giggle, “So it begins.”
“Shit. Let me go check on her, Don’t move.”
I smiled softly. “I promise, I’m not going anywhere.”
As he walked backward, Cale had a huge smile on his face. I wanted to tell him to watch out, but it was too late. He fell over the ottoman and did a pretty impressive roll. I slammed my hands to my mouth to cover my laugh.
“Are you okay?” I asked
He jumped up. “Yes! I’m more than okay. Just hold on. Don’t move.” He turned and began running up stairs, but he tripped and fell. “Shit! I’ll be right back!” He yelled as he continued running to the nursery.
I dropped my head back and hugged myself, reminding myself that I needed to take this slow. I knew I shouldn’t jump into bed with him, no matter what I felt.
“Oh, God!” Cale shouted. “Oh my God. What the hell?” he continued as he walked down the stairs, his arms outstretched, holding Lily.
“What’s wrong?” I asked as I started to walk toward them. Then I smelled it. I placed my hand over my nose. “Oh my God! What’s that smell?”
“Bath! Maddie get the bath out!”
That’s when I saw it. Lily had shit all the way up her back. I ran over to the cabinet and grabbed the bath before racing into the kitchen. I began frantically taking dirty dishes out of the sink.
“Jesus, Cale. When did you last do dishes?” I asked as I tossed them all on the counter.
“I’m gonna throw up. Oh God!” Cale cried out as he began to gag.
I turned on the water and looked around for the damn rubber duck thermometer Monica had insisted we buy, to make sure we got the water temperature just right. “Where’s the rubber duck? Shit! Where’s the rubber duck?”
Cale was gagging as he tried to take off Lily’s clothes. “Right. There. Oh God, I’m gonna throw up…it’s in her hair! How the hell did she get shit in her hair?”
I found the rubber ducky and pushed it under the running water. “Cale! We can’t swear in front of her.”
Perfect water temperature. I went back to the cabinet and grabbed a washcloth and baby soap, then ran back into the kitchen where I slipped on something and went down. Hard.
I jumped back up and yelled, “I’m okay! I just slipped on…” I looked down to see Lily’s shitty clothes on the floor.
Cale pushed Lily toward me. “Take her! Oh, God, take her, I’m gonna throw up.”
I took her and felt my hands touch something warm. No. Nope. I didn’t just touch shit. Nope. I didn’t. Then I looked.
“Oh God oh God oh God! Eww! Oh my God, it’s all over her.” Cale grabbed the sprayer and began spraying Lily.
“Stop! It’s spraying in my mouth! Cale, stop!”
I turned and placed Lily in the tub. When I looked at her she had the biggest smile I’d ever seen on her face. My heart soared as I noticed how big my baby girl had gotten in just a month. I smiled back at her and grabbed the washcloth and poured soap on it.
“We can’t let her sit in this water,” I said. “Grab the back-up tub!”
Cale was still gagging as he jumped over the mess on the floor and ran upstairs to Lily’s room.
“You little stinker. What did you do?” I asked as I attempted to clean her off. Cale came running back into the kitchen and put three towels down. I handed Lily to him as I said, “Here, take her for right now. I think I got most of it off. Let me dump this and fill the other tub up with clean water.”
Cale wrapped her up in a towel. “Baby girl, what are you trying to do?” he asked. “Daddy can deal with a little bit of poo…but not that much.”
I giggled as I filled up the new tub. I turned and held my hands out for Lily. Cale gave her to me and I slipped her down into the clean water to give her a proper bath.
“I’ll take all this into the laundry room,” Cale said as he started picking up the clothes on the floor.
I watched him walk out of the kitchen attempting to hold his nose as he brought the dirty clothes and tub to the laundry room. I glanced back at Lily and shook my head to get the naughty thoughts out.
“Your daddy is the hottest man ever,” I said, fanning myself. She smiled. “Yeah, you know he is, don’t you? Only he could make gagging look sexy as hell.”
Once I had her all cleaned up and wrapped in a towel, I stood and held her. I took in a deep breath and sighed. “I missed you so much.”
“Um…Maddie. You might want to give me Lily now.”
I glared at Cale. “No! I haven’t seen her in a month and she’s all clean-smelling. She’s mine.”
He walked up to me and smiled as he ran his finger along Lily’s face. His love for his daughter had my stomach clenching with desire. He looked up and placed his hand on the side of my face. “Maddie, you have shit all over your pants from where you fell on her pajamas.”
I grimaced. “Oh, gross.”
“Here, give her to me and I’ll give her a bottle and get her back to sleep. Go take a shower.”
“What should I do with my clothes?” I asked.
He gave me a look that made me take a sharp breath. “Put them in the laundry room with Lily’s. You can put on one of my T-shirts if you want.”
I bit down on my lip and slipped off my favorite pair of comfy pants. I watched Cale as his mouth opened slightly and his eyes traveled to my lacey, white thong. I pulled my shirt up and over my head, silently thanking God that I’d decided to wear the matching push-up bra. I winked at Cale as I walked out of the kitchen and into the laundry room. I grabbed Lily’s clothes and threw hers and mine into the washer and put it on hot. In the living room I glanced over my shoulder to find Cale staring at me.
“Do you mind if I use your shower?” I asked in my sexiest voice.
“Um…uh…”
I turned away from him and kept walking, making sure to swing my hips just a little bit more than necessary. “I’ll take that as a no.”
The hot water felt amazing. I must have stood under it for at least ten minutes. I grabbed the shampoo and was about to put some in my hand when I felt his touch on my shoulder. The feeling that zipped through my body was unbelievable. I spun around to find him standing in the shower with me. Naked.
I gazed down his body and then met his eyes. They were filled with desire.
“Maddie, I’m going to make love to you now.”
I smiled as I dropped the shampoo bottle and wrapped my arms around his neck.
“Screw taking it slow,” I whispered. He grinned back and pulled my lips to his.
Finally.
I’D STOOD OUTSIDE the bathroom door for a couple of minutes and debated my reasons for not going in. Finally, I thought, fuck it. I stripped out of my pants and headed into the bathroom and saw her standing in my shower. I threw out the idea of taking things slow. I wanted her. I needed her.
When our lips finally connected, she pushed her hands into my hair and moaned. I pushed her back against the shower wall and kissed her like I
was never going to kiss her again.
“Cale,” she whispered. “Oh, God. I’ve missed you.”
My heart slammed in my chest. I moved my lips down her neck as I lifted her leg and she hooked it around me. My hand moved down and cupped her perfect breast. I leaned down and sucked on her nipple.
She moaned and said, “Feels. So. Good.”
I moved my lips to her other breasts as she reached down and began to stroke my dick. “Maddie, I won’t last if you keep touching me.”
She pulled her hand away and placed both hands on my shoulders. “More. Cale. Please. I’ve waited so long.”
I lightly traced my fingers down the side of her body as I moved my lips back up to her neck, along her jaw and to her ear lobe, which I began to kiss and nibble.
She sucked in a breath as my fingers made their way between her legs. She pushed into my hand and I couldn’t help but smile.
“Do you need to come, baby?” I whispered in her ear.
She thrashed her head back and forth. “I need you, Cale. I only need you.”
I pushed my fingers into her and moaned when I felt her clamp down. I closed my eyes and moaned against her sensitive neck. I began to massage her insides, slow at first and then faster. Her hips began a rhythm as I pulled back to see her face. Her head was leaned back against the wall and she was biting on her lower lip.
Fuck. I could come right now, watching her fall apart because of my fingers.
“Yes,” she said. “I’m so close.”
I knew one touch of my thumb to her clit would send her over the edge. I pulled my lips from hers and pushed my thumb against her clit, moving it in a circle. Her eyes snapped open and her head jerked forward as her eyes captured mine.
“I’m going to come, Cale. I’m going to come.” I slammed my lips back against hers and swallowed her screams of pleasure. I kept on massaging out her orgasm until she went limp in my arms.
I held her in my arms as her breathing slowly returned to normal. She had wrapped her arms around my neck and buried her face as she rode out the last waves of her orgasm. When she pulled back, she was crying. My entire world stopped.
I placed my hands on the side of her face. “Baby, what’s wrong?”
She sucked on her lower lip as she shook her head. “Please tell me I’m not dreaming. Please, Cale. Tell me this is real.”
In that moment I knew nothing would ever be the same. I reached over and turned off the water, then grabbed a towel and began drying her off. Once she was completely dry, I wrapped the towel around her. Grabbing another towel, I quickly dried off. I stepped out of the shower and threw my towel to the floor. I reached down and picked her up and carried her to the bedroom. Gently, I put her down and pulled the towel off of her body. She acted as if she wanted to cover up.
“You’re so damn beautiful. The most beautiful and perfect woman I’ve ever seen.”
She blushed and looked away for a second before she said, “You take my breath away, Cale.”
I picked her up again and laid her on the bed. I climbed onto the bed and over her. “How far do you want to take this, Maddie? I’ll do whatever you want, baby.”
She smiled that sweet smile of hers. She placed her hand on the side of my face. “I want to know I’m not dreaming. I want to wake up in the morning wrapped in your arms. I want you to make love to me.”
I smiled as I leaned down and kissed her gently. “I want that, too.” I reached over and pulled out the side drawer. She grabbed my arm.
“Have you been tested recently? I mean since…Zoey.”
I swallowed hard. “Before I married Zoey, the first thing I did was get tested. Then again after she…after she died I was re-tested. Jack suggested it.”
Maddie gave me a weak smile. “I’ve been tested, too. I don’t want there to be anything between us, Cale. I’m on the pill.”
I pulled back and looked at her. “Maddie, are you sure?”
A look of horror crossed her face. “I mean…if you’d rather not. I didn’t mean…”
I quickly moved and placed my hands on her cheeks and kissed her. I spread her legs open wider and teased her entrance with my tip, pushing in a little bit further each time.
“Please don’t make me beg, Cale,” she said. “Please just take me as yours.”
Jesus.
I closed my eyes and moaned as I pushed myself into her. She whimpered and I stopped. “Did I hurt you?” I asked.
She smiled and wrapped her legs around me. “No. Everything feels amazing.”
I moved in and out of her. The way we kissed each other was like nothing I’d never experienced. Something was happening between us, and we both felt it. Her fingers traced up and down my back as I pushed deeper into her. I couldn’t get deep enough.
“I want to crawl inside your body,” I said, “and stay there forever.”
I took her hand and intertwined our fingers. I pushed our hands above her head as I pushed deeper into her with each thrust.
She moaned as she arched her back. “Cale, don’t stop. I’m going to come.”
I placed my lips to her ear as I pushed in as deep as I could and she began to whisper my name. As I felt my own release build, I spoke into her ear, “Maddie, I love you. I love you so much.”
“I love you, Cale,” she said as she wrapped her legs around me tighter, holding onto me as I poured into her. As I came, I moved my lips to hers and kissed her as we whispered each other’s names in this unbelievable moment of passion.
I didn’t want to pull out of her. I held her and she held me and we stayed as one.
I moved so that I could look into her eyes. “I love you, Maddie.”
A tear rolled down her face and I kissed it away as she blinked slowly. “I love you, too, Cale. I finally feel like I’m home.”
My heart dropped and I stared into her eyes. I slowly smiled before kissing her again. “We’re both home. Forever.”
I WOKE UP to the sun shining through the bedroom window. I didn’t even have to move to know that Cale and I were wrapped in a tangled mess of hotness. He had his arms around me and his legs were over mine. It was as if he was afraid I would sneak away while he was sleeping.
I closed my eyes, remembering our night together. My body was going to feel it today. After making love, Cale and I had fallen asleep. But then Lily woke up. I threw on a T-shirt, and fed her while Cale slept. When I crawled back into bed, he climbed onto me and made love to me again. Of course, not before first giving me the most amazing orgasm with his lips.
I opened my eyes as I touched my swollen lips. Closing them again I was taken back to just two hours ago when I’d woken up to hear him breathing. Turning over to watch him sleep, I couldn’t take it another second. I’d crawled on top of him and taken my turn at making love to him.
The night was amazing. Magical. Incredibly romantic. I’d never experienced anything like it before.
Cale moaned as he rolled over. I missed his warmth as soon as he let me go. Rolling over, I rested my head on my hand and watched him sleep. Everything about him was perfect. I reached down, pinched my arm, and smiled. Nope. Not a dream.
Lily was making little sounds through the baby monitor, so I crawled out of bed and reached for the T-shirt I’d left on the floor. I slipped it on and made my way upstairs to the nursery. When I walked in and looked down at Lily in her crib, she smiled the biggest smile I’d ever seen.
“Good morning, baby girl. How did you sleep last night? You were such a good girl and only woke up once.”
I scooped her up and brought her over to the changing table. After a quick diaper change and dressing her in a pretty little new outfit, I picked Lily back up and headed downstairs to heat up a bottle. I stopped dead in my tracks when I saw a woman standing in the kitchen.
“Um…you startled me,” I said as I gave her a polite smile.
She gave Lily and me a once-over before saying, “I could say the same, señorita.”
This must be the nanny, I t
hought. Maria. Shit.
I started to flush, realizing I was wearing only Cale’s shirt—with no panties.
She tilted her head and stared. “You um…what do you say…spent the night?”
I felt the heat move through my cheeks. “Ah. Yes I did.”
“You sleep in guest room? You’re a friend, si?”
The way she was looking at me like she was ready to stomp on me told me Maria had feelings for Cale.
“No, Maria. She’s more than a friend. Did you forget that I told you I didn’t need you on Saturdays anymore?”
When Maria saw Cale, her eyes lit up. “You need me, Mr. Blackwood, you just don’t know it.”
I attempted to hide my smile as I glanced over to Cale. He looked shocked.
“Um,” he said, “can I speak with you in my office please?”
“After I feed the baby,” Maria said as she held out her arms for me to give Lily to her. I held on tighter.
“Maddie will feed her. I’d like to talk to you now, please,” Cale said as he turned and walked to his office.
Poor Maria’s face dropped as she followed him. I peeked over my shoulder and watched them both walk away.
To Lily, I whispered, “I think Maria is about to have a bad day little one.”
Lily smiled and I couldn’t help but giggle as I put her in her swing. I took a bottle out of the refrigerator and heated it up. “Shall we have breakfast on the deck, sweet girl?” I headed into the laundry and quickly pulled my pants from the dryer and slipped them on before getting Lily and heading out the deck.
I stared out over the lake as Lily drank her bottle. Every now and then I looked down at her and grinned. My heart filled with so much love for this little girl. I’d never in my life felt so content.
“I love you and your daddy, Lily,” I said. “I love you both so much and I’ve been so stubborn and silly. Not anymore, though! I’m going to shower you both with lots of kisses and hugs. Oh, and long walks. I love long walks. Especially in the fall. Something about fall and the leaves when they change colors—I just love it. When you get older, we’ll make those silly little leaf collection things.”
The Journey Home Page 14