by Taryn Quinn
Sadie whined and stuck her head on my lap. I gazed down at her and stroked her silky ears. “I know. I feel the same way.”
Because there was no one there to share the bread with, I pulled out the sanitizer from the diaper bag and doused my hands, and then ate three pieces. It was warm and fresh with a cup of honey butter hidden in the basket. I hadn’t realized just how hungry I was.
My phone buzzed.
Jared.
It was a text message letting me know he had no idea when he’d be back home for the night. I breathed a sigh of relief. I wasn’t ready to talk to him.
Namely because I would probably leave a dent in his stupid forehead at this moment.
Sadie curled under the table and put her head on my foot with a heavy sigh.
I definitely was on the same wavelength. I sent him back a quick text letting him know we’d be fine. I could see a bubbling reply, but then it went silent. I shoved my phone back into the outside pocket of the diaper bag.
A woman with dark hair showed up in front of me with two plates.
“Hey. Gillian, right?”
She nodded. “You’re Sheriff Brooks’ girl?”
Was that all I was? “I’m Gina Ramos.”
Gillian’s smile went from polite to friendly. “Sorry. Just how I remember faces. Curse of the waitress.”
“I hear that one.”
“Oh, yeah?” She carried a big bowl of stew and more bread.
“Yeah, I work at the diner.”
“Oh, right.” She shrugged. “I’m always here. I don’t go into town too much. I think I made it into Brewed Awakening twice. Hard to pass up the free food here.”
“No offense taken, don’t worry. Besides, it seems as if Mason keeps you busy.”
“To say the least.” She glanced over her shoulder to find him. Her gaze narrowed as she spotted him speaking to a group of women.
Hmm. Was it like that? At least from her direction.
Her jaw tightened and matched the fisted hands she stuffed into her apron.
Evidently, very much like that.
“Anyway, let me know if you need anything.” She nudged the stew bowl toward me. It barely made it to the middle of my side of the table before she was crossing to meet him at another table full of smiling women.
I rolled my eyes as I picked up my spoon. This was why I didn’t date. All the emotions involved were a pain in the ass. I liked staying in my lane, and before Jared, I’d been less than excited to put myself out there. I’d dated when the lonely itch got too much. But did I really want to do that again?
Start from scratch?
“Very intense thought process going on over here.”
I put my spoon down. “Finally done using your niece to pick up girls?”
Sadie peeked out from under the table when Mason tucked the sleepy little girl into her carrier. A frosty peach-colored teether was hooked onto her wrist. Even with her head falling heavy into the bumper on her pretty carrier, she shoved the cold compress to her gums with a needy sound.
Looked like I might have a long night ahead of me.
“Sorry, I got caught up with customers.”
“Mmm-hmm.”
He nodded to me as he sat down. “Don’t like the stew?”
“No, it’s amazing. You missed me eating the first half like I was starving.”
“What, my brother doesn’t feed you?”
“He feeds me fine.” I swallowed hard at the image of exactly what kind of afternoon I’d had. Food hadn’t exactly been our focus.
Mason held up a hand. “That face and the blush says it all. I really don’t need details.”
“I wasn’t giving them.”
“Then again, there’s another cousin in the pile, right? Your sister’s baby? Now you’re an aunt and a mom.”
I blew out a breath. “I’m not her mom.”
Mason frowned. “Of course you are. More than her biological one times a million. Jared is so glad to have you in her life—hell, in both of their lives. I’ve never seen him happier. In fact—”
“Just stop.”
He leaned forward with his hands folded. “What’s going on?”
“Nothing. It’s just a lot, okay? Everything has been a lot. This is still all so new.”
“It’s not new. You guys have been together forever.”
“No, we’ve been friends. Friends.” I tried to take a deep breath. “Just because we got naked in a high-stress situation doesn’t mean we are ready for marriage and more babies.” Horror engulfed me as the tears started coming like a flood.
“Gina.” Mason grabbed my hands. “Hey. It’s okay.”
I pulled my hands free. “No. I just need to go, okay? I’m just overtired, and it’s been a crazy day.” I couldn’t look at him. Couldn’t stand myself right now.
“Hey, wait. Don’t go.”
I grabbed Sami’s diaper bag. “I just need to get home.”
“I don’t think you should drive like this.”
I sniffled. “I’ll be fine.”
“Let me drive you. I’ll bring the Jeep back after work.”
I shook my head. “I can’t be without a car. I already left my car at the diner because of Leo and my sister. I don’t know what time Jared will be home—I mean, back.”
The swirl of panic and tears were a thick soup, and I felt like I was drowning. I turned to Sami and found her sleeping. Her sweet cheeks were flushed, and a burbling sigh of contentment was the only peep that came out of her. She was completely clueless to my stupid breakdown.
“Okay. Hang on, I’ll figure out something.” He rose and looked around. Then he seemed to spot someone and crossed the restaurant with his long-legged stride.
God, I felt impossibly worse. I didn’t want anyone to be put out because I was a mess. It was my own fault. If I would just tell Jared about my past, then he could…
What? Break up with me?
That wasn’t what he’d do. But I didn’t want to saddle him with my stupid busted ovaries. He was so honorable that he’d tough it out. What happened when he realized the mistake he was making?
“Hey.” Mason touched my arm.
I brushed away the tears that wouldn’t stop coming. Sadie put her head on my knee and licked my fingers.
“Jackie is going to drive me back after I drop you.”
“I can drive, Mason.”
“Just humor me, okay?”
I tipped my head back. “Fine.”
Mason took the diaper bag and the carrier. “She’s out for the count.”
“Until she gets hungry.”
“Just like her dad.”
I grabbed the chest strap carrier and followed him out, Sadie hot on my heels. I couldn’t look at the woman in the chef uniform who was willing to extend her day just to help me out.
Mason was already at the backseat on the passenger side where Sami’s carseat was.
“I can take her,” I offered.
Mason gave me a grateful smile. “Still not sure of the buckles and things.” He held his carrier and I unbuckled her to swap her into the carseat. I passed off my keys, and Mason took the crazy pink carrier with him and put it in his car. He came back and let Sadie in the backseat on the driver’s side, then started the car, warming it up for the quick ride to Jared’s. We actually weren’t far from home since Jared also lived on the lake.
I got her strapped in and kissed her cheek. She shouldn’t be sleeping this late in the day, but today was a day of weirdness.
No one’s schedule was right.
I climbed in and stared out the window as we pulled away. Once we were out of The Mason Jar’s parking lot, it was almost complete darkness. The night was overcast, so there wasn’t even a moon or starlight off the water.
Just pitch black, endless darkness.
I pressed my forehead to the cool window.
“I hope I didn’t upset you.”
I didn’t look at Mason, but I reached over and patted his arm. “It’s not y
ou.”
“My boneheaded brother?”
“Some of it. Some of it is me.” I had to own up to that part. I wasn’t making any of this any easier on us.
“You two will work it out. You never fight for long.”
I smiled faintly. “That’s true.”
Sadie pushed her way between the seats and rested her head on the console.
“I’m fine, girl.”
“Animals know,” Mason said quietly.
“I just need a little rest, and things will look better.”
“I hope so.”
I was too tired to talk after that. Michael Bublé sang quietly on the radio about a white Christmas with a little Shania accompaniment. The sweet duet watered me up again.
I hoped we had a happy Christmas.
More than anything, I just hoped there was an us at the end of all of this.
Twenty-Five
Sleep was for pussies.
That was what I kept telling myself as I worked my second straight twelve-hour day. Between the fire and a rash of sickness spreading like wildfire in the station, I didn’t have a second to think.
I’d even managed to hire a new deputy. Brady McNeill was a single guy transplanting to New York from Connecticut. He had a solid background in small and metropolitan cities. I had a good feeling about him, and God willing he didn’t turn tail and run when he heard about the folktale status we were entering with the baby boom.
I also had to deal with the investigation into the fire. It hadn’t exactly been foul play, but it had required more than a quick inquiry or hand off to code enforcement. In the end, it had been faulty safeguards in the building. Updates that Morty and Kathy had put on the books for their annual insurance review hadn’t actually been done.
And that meant they wouldn’t have the insurance money to rebuild. So instead, they’d sold off their property to Maitland, which made me uneasy.
Maitland Enterprises had been buying up any and all land or property they could in Crescent Cove. Our town thrived on the actual townspeople who loved it. Shopping small was a way of life here. I didn’t want it to turn into a place where rich people came in and changed things.
Now I didn’t mind their money in our shops. The condos on the lake brought in a lot more visitors these days. But the storefronts had been created by people invested in keeping our town special. I just hoped Maitland didn’t rent the space out to just anyone.
Or worse, that they were looking to expand with something that didn’t fit with the town. We had eclectic tastes here and liked it that way. Where else could you find a clothing store across from a yoga studio and then a horror-themed restaurant the next building over?
But all of that paled in comparison to the chill going on at my house. Each time I tried to talk to Bee about what happened the day Leo was born, she was either sleeping or rushing out the door. It didn’t help that Sami had been extra fussy in the middle of all of this.
Bee looked so exhausted I didn’t have the heart to wake her to have a discussion about it. Hell, I didn’t want to have it any more than she did, but I couldn’t go on with this heaviness sitting between us.
Today she couldn’t shut me down. I glanced down at my watch. We had an appointment with Preston Shaw to do the paperwork to finalize our part of the legal transfer of parental rights to me.
Samantha Mae would officially be a Brooks soon and nothing and no one would be able to take her from me. As long as Trina signed off on it.
I don’t know how she could have walked away from her, but then again, my mother had done the same. And not just me, but from another baby and a man who loved her beyond blind devotion. If my mother walked back into my dad’s life right now, I wasn’t sure he’d turn her away.
I could not say the same.
I held it against Trina to the same degree. You didn’t walk away from your family—period.
Especially not a helpless baby. A happy baby with nothing but a brightness inside her that made me smile every single day. The same brightness Bee had and shared with my daughter. I just needed to make her see that we were an amazing family. And that we were stronger together as a unit.
I didn’t think I’d ever find someone who matched me in every way. I should have known it would be her all along. Even with almost ten years between us in age, we’d always clicked better than anyone in my life save for my family.
I’d just been too afraid of fucking things up with her to step over the line from platonic to intimate. Now that it had happened, I couldn’t imagine it any other way.
“Sheriff?”
I looked up at our temp who was still covering for Bonnie. “What’s up?”
She twisted nervous fingers together. “You asked me to remind you fifteen minutes before you needed to leave.”
“Thanks, Esther. I’m heading out now. Has Christian checked in?”
“Yes, sir. He said he’s started patrol.”
“Perfect. If you run into trouble, Deputy McNeill is on call. I’ll be out of reach.”
“Yes, sir.”
“Esther?”
“Yes, sir?”
“You can relax with the sir.”
“Yes, sir—I mean, yes, Sheriff.”
I shook my head and grabbed my wool coat off the rack. “Okay. I’ll see you tomorrow.”
I hustled out to my Jeep. I’d swapped my uniform shirt for an olive button-down and skipped a tie. I was picking up Bee from the café to save some time. My dad had agreed to take Sami for the day since she was still so fussy. Brewed Awakening was around the corner from the station. I’d been prepared to go inside to get her, but she was outside talking to Kinleigh.
It was a rare sunny day in the Cove. Lake effect left a perpetual haze over the sun most of the time, so the park was especially crowded with people. The breeze lifted Bee’s hair. It was down today and floated around her shoulders in dark ribbons. She was wearing a red sweater and gray trousers with her long navy wool coat.
She was laughing at something Kinleigh said and it punched me in the chest to realize I hadn’t seen her smile in days. I pulled up in front of The Haunt since, as usual, parking was chaos near the hub of town. Everyone and their grandmother stopped in for coffee at Macy’s place, but on a sunny day? Yeah, that was double time.
Bee noticed my Jeep and waved a goodbye to Kinleigh. She was holding two cups, so I reached over and opened the door for her.
“Hey.” Her spicy gingerbread scent floated into the car first, then the strong scent of my usual coffee as she swung her legs in. “Thought you might need a little caffeine.”
I leaned in and took a taste of Bee instead.
She sucked in a surprised breath, her lips cool from being outside, but then she relaxed and kissed me back.
I drew away but couldn’t help smiling. “I needed that more.” I took the cup for a sip. “Now I’m perfect.”
She grinned at me and tucked her cup into the cup holder. “How was your day?”
“Mostly smooth. Yours?”
“Mitch only threw one bag of ice at Polly today. We’re making progress.”
I raised an eyebrow.
“Polly has been reorganizing the freezer.”
“Oh.”
“Yeah.”
I didn’t know Mitch well. I wasn’t sure anyone really did unless you worked for him. But he didn’t seem like the type who liked change.
We chitchatted about town things and Sami on the way to Kensington Square. It was only about twenty minutes from Crescent Cove, but it was much more of a city than we were. Preston’s place was in a business complex across from a community park. Except this park wasn’t really set up for families. It was more urban with benches to eat at and a large patch of grass that was used for outdoor yoga sessions or picnics in the summer.
It was similar to the Cove in that it was more small businesses than chains, but it definitely had a more urban chic flavor to it. Artists, foodies, and young professionals made up the majority of the people as we
drove by.
I was going to head into the parking garage but got lucky with a parking meter right near his building. I fed the meter and met Gina on the sidewalk. She was checking her phone.
“Everything okay?”
“Yeah, I was just checking on Sami. That tooth is going to come in any day.”
“She’s drooling on everything in sight. Including Sadie.” I laid my hand on Bee’s lower back as we started walking.
“I know. Now I know why my mom complained about laundry. That little girl goes through at least four outfits a day.”
“And grows out of two of them.”
“That’s the truth.”
We walked through the revolving doors, her booted heels clicking over the marble floor. It was a pretty swanky building. Evidently, Preston was doing well for himself. I wasn’t quite sure how that was true with the basement price he was charging me. Then again, family law wasn’t exactly his specialty. His was more of a broken marriage clientele.
His assistant met us at the elevators and led us to a conference room.
“Mr. Shaw will be right in.”
“Thanks.”
Bee shrugged out of her coat and headed to the windows to look down at the park. She folded her coat over her arm and fussed with a button.
“This is pretty much just a formality, but I appreciate you coming with me.”
She gave me a half smile. “Of course.”
I draped my coat on one of the chairs, then rubbed my hands together. I knew there weren’t going to be any real answers today, but nerves still buzzed under my skin. I didn’t even know if Preston had found Trina.
“Bee, we really need to—”
The door opened. Preston stepped inside and I swallowed down what I was going to say. He was a tall guy, a few inches taller than me, in a navy Brooks Brothers suit that definitely didn’t come off the rack. “Hey, Jared. Thanks for coming in so fast.”
“I’d like to get all of this moving as quickly as possible.”
Preston crossed to Bee and held out his hand. “You must be Gina?”
She shook his hand. “Yes. Thanks for helping Jared, Mr. Shaw.”