A few minutes later, Teo brought over bowls of mutton and potatoes to where Aina sat at the edge of the bed. Ynes stood and moved to her room with Teo’s help, coughing all the way there.
They ate dinner quietly and, after clearing away their plates, Teo returned and threw himself under the blankets, eyes closed. Aina tensed up, then forced herself to relax.
Who closed their eyes in front of someone capable of killing them? It was that word she didn’t recognize, that sense of relationship built up between two people. It was trust. She had no idea what she’d done to deserve it.
“So, Aina. We’ve known each other for a few years now. I know that you’re good with a knife—”
“Excellent with a knife—”
“—You like firebrandy, and you think diamonds are the prettiest kind of jewelry.” She rolled her eyes. “I’ll tell you something you don’t know about me. I’m good at my job. I’m my own boss, and it pays well. But sometimes it’s exhausting. You can only pull a trigger so many times before your fingers get tired. Coming home at night and taking care of my mother, it makes me feel a little … less like a monster. How do you cope with it?”
“I try not to think about that,” Aina said. “This is my life. If I ever deny that, or start to feel guilty about my jobs, I’ll lose my touch and end up in an alley with a bunch of bullets in my chest.”
He nodded, no sign of judgment on his features.
“There were too many casualties. Too many things that went wrong tonight.” Aina paused, trying to voice what was bothering her. “I didn’t have time to watch him die.”
Teo opened his eyes and scoffed, “I know a dead man when I see one. You slit his throat completely through, Aina. He’s gone. You should be happy.”
With a bitter laugh, Aina said, “Happiness has nothing to do with it.”
“I know.” He frowned. “When you grow up starving, and someone finally hands you a piece of bread, you don’t think it’s real. Or you think it’s a trick.”
Aina nodded. “Or like I have to be extra careful. It feels like … if I make one mistake, I’ll lose everything and end up back where I started.”
“Why do you sell the diamonds behind your boss’s back, then?” Teo asked. “Not judging. Just curious. It’s really risky.”
“I don’t know,” Aina said. “I suppose it feels good to have a little control. You know, it’s been six years, but sometimes I can’t believe Kohl saved me from that bombing. Like one day I’ll wake up and still be a child freezing on a street corner somewhere, half in a coma from sniffing glue. I know it’s stupid.”
“No, it’s not. I’d think you were stupid if you got used to the idea of being secure. But you killed Kouta Hirai. If Kohl ever regretted saving you, he won’t now.”
“Who knows what he thinks?” She lay down and sighed, a few wisps of black hair flying away from her face as she did. “He usually just pays me and then waves me out of his office. But this is different. I don’t know how he truly feels about me starting my own tradehouse. He shows nothing.”
“Sounds like you need some kind of assassin support group.”
She slapped him on the shoulder, and he pretended to wince in pain.
“But really, if Kohl won’t say congratulations, then I will. Congratulations, Aina. You’re the best Blade in Kosín, and when I watch you cut holes in people, I think I hear angels singing.”
She let out a snort of laughter and then hushed herself, remembering his mother was trying to sleep in the next room.
“So, why does Kohl’s approval matter so much?” Teo asked. “You already know he respects you. He trusted you enough to do this job in the first place.”
“That’s true.” Aina twirled a frayed end of the blanket around her finger. Even on that first terrifying night she’d met Kohl in the bar that was about to be bombed, each of his words and movements were like lightning across a bleak sky. It was an innate charisma he bore, one she either wanted to attain for herself or break down into something more human with what she might mean to him.
“Can you keep a secret, Teo?”
“Sure,” he whispered. “You can tell me anything.”
He blew out the candle on the nightstand, leaving them in darkness except for the moonlight coming through the kitchen window. She focused on that beam of light as she tried to voice her thoughts.
“I find him … admirable,” she said. “He’s fearless. Capable. I’ve never seen anyone fight the way he does. So that’s it. I admire him.”
There was a brief pause when she was very grateful the room was dark enough to hide her blush.
Why did I even say anything?
She could practically hear the smile spreading on Teo’s face. “So, what you really mean to say is that you’re attracted to him because he’s good at killing people?”
With a shocked gasp, she pushed him so hard, he nearly rolled off the bed. As he laughed, she pulled the blanket up to her face and turned toward the wall so she wasn’t facing him.
“No,” she answered resolutely, even though her cheeks burned.
“Well, you need to start seeing that you’re good enough with or without his approval. You don’t need him to break out a bottle of champagne every time you kill someone, and starting your own tradehouse isn’t good enough. You have to do what you can to succeed. You need to prove that you’re better than him.”
As if she didn’t already want that. Digging her fingers into the blanket, she asked in a small voice, “How?”
“Beat him. Take him down. Not that I advocate violence, young lady.” He paused for her to laugh. “Once you do, he’ll lose all of his murderous allure. Then you can see whether you actually like him or if that’s all there was to it. And then you can see if there’s someone better for you.”
She glanced over at him at those words, her brow furrowed, but his eyes were closed and his features revealed nothing.
They fell asleep minutes later. As her eyes grew heavy, Aina imagined what it would feel like to have arms around her waist, but failed to put a face to the picture.
* * *
The following morning, Aina returned to the Dom. She slid open Kohl’s office door to find him seated at his desk in the middle of writing something, the orange lamplight shining on his vulture tattoo and the sapphires on his watch. Kohl’s eyes, devoid of emotion, slid up to lock with hers.
“It’s done.”
A smile flickered across his face. “So I’ve heard. The client sent a message this morning to let me know. I knew you could do it, Aina.”
She fought the urge to say, Of course I could.
In a few strides, he reached the door, took her hand, and pulled her inside the office. He took her to his desk, then let go of her hand and unlocked his safe. He pulled out a box of money and gave it to her. It was so heavy, it dragged down her pocket once she placed it inside.
“Do you have any more big hits coming up?” she asked, keeping her voice casual. “I’d be happy to take them off your hands.”
“Perhaps.” One side of his lips pulled upward in a smile, but it didn’t reach his eyes. “Let’s say that if your Kouta Hirai hit was a diamond, then my next job is a black diamond. A once-in-a-lifetime chance.”
His voice trailed off. Curiosity tugged at her, but when he didn’t elaborate, she knew he wouldn’t say anything else. All she wanted was for him to tell her she could be free to start her own tradehouse, but she had to wait for him to say so.
It was like any other kill. She told him it was done, he paid her, and they moved on with their lives. But there was something different now, something nearly tangible in the air that electrified when he approached. His footsteps pressed into the carpet below, somehow even heavier than the box of kors. Was she really going to leave him now? Would the others bid her goodbye, wish her luck? Would he?
Uncertainty shot through her like lightning. She’d been planning this for years, but now it seemed anticlimactic, or like perhaps she was getting in over her hea
d. Would she be more content to stay here, living under his protection, if he would simply hold her, tell her he cared, and that he didn’t want her to leave?
“You’ve done well, Aina. I knew I was right to bring you here.” His blue eyes shone with pride, with the most praise anyone had ever shown her. “You’ve done enough. You’ve earned enough money, you have the support you need, and you’re as skilled as you need to be. I won’t stand in the way of your success, but you can still come to me if you need assistance. I’m sure I’ll see you again.”
She nodded and took a step back, one hand resting on the doorframe. But he’d already returned to his desk. Before he could look up and ask why she was still standing there, she left, surprised to find she was trembling.
What did I expect, a party?
The Dom looked so cold and bleak from the outside. She thought of Tannis and Mirran, Mazir’s empty bed, the three recruits Kohl trained. She’d kept her distance from the others most of the time, too focused on her own job and too wary to trust any of them enough to become true friends. But they’d still worked together, trained together, bandaged each other whenever someone was injured, and did their best to keep Kohl happy so they could all stay here.
She would be alone with her own tradehouse until she managed to build up a team. She had ideas of where to start, and she was grateful to still have Kohl’s protection, but she would miss the sense of community and safety in the Dom.
Shaking her head, she walked away, refusing to look back. She’d gotten what she’d fought for all this time. Perhaps she would feel more confident once she got her own tradehouse operating. There were always whispers on the street of grunts at other tradehouses who didn’t like working for their bosses anymore, but she had to be careful in contacting them, or else their bosses might find out she was trying to poach them and kill them before she could.
After depositing her and Teo’s money in each of their accounts, Aina tightened her bloodstained scarf and set out. Passengers jostled by her with luggage as she passed the train station. Raised voices caught her attention from beyond them.
A crowd had circled around King Verrain’s statue, the sword through his chest reflecting the midday sun with a startling brightness that drew her eye like a moth to a flame.
In front of it stood a raised platform surrounded by Diamond Guards. Their rifles glinted under the sun and their wolflike gazes penetrated the crowd as if trying to find the criminals among it by sight alone. But her eyes focused on the people who stood on the platform, their chins lifted imperiously, their clothes of fine silk, velvet, and leather. Only the wealthy could afford clothes like that, and these five composed the Sentinel—the highest governmental body in the country, all Steels, and each of them even richer than the Hirai family.
General Bautix spoke while the others nodded beside him with hardened expressions. Since he was speaking, Aina assumed this was some kind of security or military announcement—he operated the prison, commanded the military and, by extension, the Diamond Guards. Bautix seemed to gain more confidence as the crowd grew, each additional spectator contributing to the volume of his voice, the fervor in his eyes, and his overinflated ego. On Bautix’s right were the rest of the Sentinel, whose names decorated every government document and announcement: Mariya Okubo, the only woman in the Sentinel, and the three other men, Eirhart, Gotaro, and Diaso.
As if they’d planned it, the black spires of the Tower of Steel rose directly behind them to the north. Others might feel foreboding, a sense of power, perhaps faith restored in the Sentinel that drove their country into an industrialized future. Aina only felt the press of smoke on her lungs and a gap between herself and them.
Bautix’s voice boomed over the gathered crowd. “One hundred thousand kors will be rewarded to whomever reveals the identity of the murderer of Kouta Hirai.”
She froze, her eyes fixed on Bautix’s face.
“Last night, a pair of unidentified persons infiltrated Amethyst Hill. One of them killed Kouta Hirai, who was among our city’s greatest financial contributors, in his own home. Motive is unclear. The primary suspect is a girl roughly eighteen or nineteen years of age, of Mil Cimas ancestry with black hair and brown eyes. We have a sketch of the killer’s face from witnesses that night.” One of the officers below the stage passed a rolled-up piece of paper to him, and he unfurled it to reveal a sketch that made Aina’s breath catch in her throat. “The Hirais are longtime personal friends of mine. I consider their late father like a brother to me, and I have given his sole surviving son, Ryuu Hirai, my personal assurance that we will bring this murderer to justice.” His voice ended with a ringing finality that settled upon the crowd like dust.
She shrank into the nearest alley and pulled up her scarf to shield her face, ignoring the coppery scent of dried blood on it. She imagined eyes on her in all directions. Bautix’s words had spread like fire through the crowd, provoking daydreams of buying boats and houses and jewels among workers who could barely afford to eat multiple times per day.
The drawing Bautix had held up resembled her with frightening accuracy. With a slight grimace on her lips and a cold determination in her eyes, the drawing had seemed to almost be in motion. The only person who had gotten a good enough look at her last night was Ryuu Hirai himself. She was a fool to have left him alive. Kohl would scold her for it later.
The Sentinel might have a drawing of her, but if she lay low, maybe dyed or cut her hair, she would be fine. This would blow over eventually.
The longer she thought about it, the more confident she grew. Her nerves from all the things that had gone wrong last night seeped away and left her with an overwhelming sense of satisfaction, like a balloon that had been filled to bursting.
“I did it,” she whispered to herself in the alley.
She’d beaten Kohl’s final test. No longer was she just a Blade doing his bidding. A girl who’d nearly frozen on the street years ago had become one of the city’s most dangerous criminals. She would never fear becoming a street child again because she herself would rule the streets. Everyone in the Stacks would respect her too much to come after her. And Kohl would start to see her differently now, she was sure of it.
She wanted to tell herself not to let the excitement get to her, to be aware that it could all change in a minute, that retaliation could come from any corner … but for once, she chose to be proud of herself.
11
Sticking to narrow side streets, she made her way toward Teo’s apartment. She avoided eye contact with everyone, keeping a dagger in her sleeve to reassure herself she was far from helpless even with a price on her head. She was on her own now, but she still had Kohl’s protection and everything he’d ever taught her, plus her own grit, to protect herself.
One long day of training three years ago, Aina had grown even more determined to do anything she could to survive, anything to prove herself against the people who would see her dead. She hadn’t known that the next night, Kohl would tell her who her first kill would be.
She’d been shooting targets behind the Dom for an hour before Kohl said to stop. Instantly, she’d begun to lower the pistol, her face coated with sweat despite the cold winter air. They’d had targets lined up on the Minos River shore for her to shoot at, and most were fallen, but she was shaking as if she’d been in a real life-or-death fight. Every time she held a gun in her own hands, all she saw was her parents collapsing to the floor. The memory never left, no matter how hard she’d tried to push it away.
Kohl never stopped shooting practice early, no matter how much she’d used to beg before learning better.
“No, let’s keep going,” she said in a rush, lifting the pistol again.
Had she really looked so weak that he actually offered to stop early? Was this a trick?
Then he reached out and took the pistol from her, his eyes flicking briefly to her shaking hands before he said, “Seriously, let’s stop. I want to go somewhere else.”
She nodded stiffly, then
followed him from the Dom, up the slanting, sleet-slicked hills of the Stacks and toward the train station in the Center.
They passed through the turnstiles without paying. One of the employees gulped nervously and waved them through, but Kohl barely glanced at him.
Passengers and suitcases jostled by them on their way to the hulking metal trains. The wheels alone stood nearly as tall as Aina. Steam and smoke billowed above the platform, making her hold her sleeve to her mouth and nose as they skirted around passengers. Her reflection in the bronze finish of the train showed her trailing after Kohl as if she were his shadow.
They reached a locked door a few minutes later. Kohl picked the lock and led the way up a narrow stairwell, down an empty hall, and to a tower on the second floor. Windows were on all sides except one, where a giant bronze clock hung.
She shivered in silence while Kohl stared out at the city with his arms crossed. It was the beginning of winter, the skies gray, frost climbing on windows. She pulled a pair of frayed mittens from her pocket and tugged them on, wishing the cold didn’t bother her. Kohl seemed to not mind it at all. With a serene look on his face, he stared down at the city like a king gazing upon his subjects.
Fighting the urge to rub her hands together for more warmth, Aina asked, “Did you want to show me something?”
He gestured at the buildings, which were tinged with the purple-gold light of a cold evening. The setting sun was behind them, but there was no warmth in that sunlight this late in the year. Since she’d spent most of the past few years at the Dom, it was easy to forget that other people saw the city from different viewpoints. Most of these streets weren’t anything to look at, but right now, with the city bathed in light before them, she could admit it was rather beautiful.
“When you start working, you’re going to have to get to know the city better.”
Raising an eyebrow, she said, “I grew up here.”
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