The Megalodon Mix-Up

by Amanda M. Lee

  I rolled my eyes. “I’m still going to make her beg for forgiveness.”

  “I look forward to seeing that.” His expression was hard to read as he looked me over. “So, where did you go after she abandoned you?”

  Uh-oh. I sensed trouble. He was fishing for information, and I had absolutely zero good answers. “Well, when I first got off the boat I was hot and sweaty and needed a break from the sun,” I offered. “I stepped under one of those footbridges, you know the ones I’m talking about?”

  He nodded.

  “I needed a few minutes to collect myself because of the heat,” I said, barreling forward. “While I was there, I caught sight of Abigail and Priscilla. I didn’t want them to see me, so I was forced to crouch down and hide.”

  “Did you hear anything good?”

  I shrugged, noncommittal. “Not really. They seemed perplexed. They were spitballing names left and right, but they clearly don’t have any information that we would find useful.”

  “Well, that’s mildly disappointing. But not unexpected. If you were going to murder someone, would you confide in one of those women?”

  “Absolutely not. I would confide in Millie if I needed help disposing of a body. She might abandon me on a paddle boat, but she would totally turn into a ride-or-die chick if I had a body to bury.”

  Jack’s brow quirked. “Good to know. Where did you go after that?”

  He was suspicious of my movements. Okay, maybe “suspicious” wasn’t the right word. He was testing me, though, and I wasn’t sure how I should answer. Breaking into Shayne’s room was one thing. He wouldn’t like it, but he would probably let it go because he was as curious as I was. Explaining how I got into the room was the problem.

  “Um ... .” I chewed my bottom lip.

  “Before you attempt to lie, you should know that Laura saw you going into the main hotel building earlier today,” Jack offered. “I know you were there for a few hours. She made sure to tell me. By the way, I guarantee she knows something is going on between us. She hasn’t come right out and said it, but she’s getting more and more desperate.”

  Great. There was no easy lie to get out of this. That meant I had to tell a version of the truth. “You’re probably not going to like it,” I hedged.

  “Try me.” He folded his arms across his chest and waited.

  “I broke into Shayne Rivers’ room and went through her computer.”

  Whatever he was expecting, that wasn’t it. Jack’s mouth dropped open and a spread of emotions fluttered across his handsome features as he struggled to find words. Finally, when he did speak, he asked the obvious question. “How?”

  “I conned the girl at the front desk into giving me a keycard.”

  “How?”

  “I said I was with Shayne’s family.” That was a lie, but not a big one. Lying about where I’d spent my afternoon would’ve been a big one. This was a little one. At least that’s what I told myself.

  “And she just gave you a keycard?” He was incredulous.

  I fished it out of my pocket for proof. “Yeah. Are you going to start yelling?”

  “I haven’t decided yet.” His eyes flashed with something, but it didn’t entirely look like anger. “Did you find anything?”

  “She had a lot of hate mail.”

  “Anything good?”

  “I took screenshots of the mail and her banking information.”

  Jack widened his eyes to comical proportions. “Charlie, you probably left fingerprints all around her room. What if the cops decide to dust after the fact?”

  I told him about the washcloth.

  “Seriously?” Instead of fury, I found respect waiting for me in the depths of his eyes. “That was smart.”

  “Wait ... are you saying you’re not going to yell? I expected a big fight.”

  “I’m saying that you could’ve been dumber when breaking into the room.”

  “Oh, that’s so sweet,” I drawled.

  He cracked a smile. “I want to see those screenshots.”

  “If you agree not to yell I’ll show them to you.”

  “If you agree to sing karaoke I’ll agree not to yell.”

  Crap! He had me over a whiskey barrel and he knew it. “Oh, I really am tone deaf.”

  “I honestly don’t care. I just want to pick the song.”

  Now he was going too far. “I could’ve lied about what I was doing.”

  “No, you couldn’t have done that.” His voice softened. “You’re inherently honest. I like that about you.”

  I swallowed hard. “So ... no yelling?”

  “No yelling.” He took the keycard from me. “No going to her room again without me either. We’re a team. That means we break the law as a unit.”

  “That sounds fair.”

  “Now, come on. We’ll get dinner, you can show me those screenshots, and then we’ll pick a song for your karaoke debut.”

  I scowled. “I’m starting to dislike you a great deal.”

  “You’ll get over it. I’m too handsome for you to stay angry.”

  That was true.

  Nineteen

  Jack was in the mood for steak, which was fine with me. After ordering, he spent a good twenty minutes going through my screenshots. When he was done, he took a minute to think before speaking.

  I thought for sure he’d changed his mind and decided to yell.

  “You could’ve gotten in trouble if you’d been caught, Charlie.”

  His voice didn’t sound particularly accusatory, but I was on edge, so the admonishment grated all the same.

  “I wasn’t caught.”

  “You could’ve been caught.”

  “But I wasn’t.”

  He sighed. “Fine. You weren’t caught.” He held up his hands in capitulation. “What do you think about the information you found?”

  I chuckled at the shift in his demeanor. “Are you using this as a teaching moment?”

  “Maybe.”

  “Well, in that case, I think Lily was right about her being a narcissist. She seemed to feed on the attention from angry emailers. Even though it was negative attention, she desperately needed it.”

  “That’s an interesting observation.” He sipped his lemonade. “What else do you see?”

  “Is this a test?”

  “No. I think you have strong instincts. You would’ve made a good cop ... if you could shake your tendency to run headlong into danger. Breaking into rooms would probably hold you back, too.”

  I smirked. “I don’t look good in uniform.”

  “I’m betting that’s not true. But I want to know what you think.”

  It could’ve been a trap. I was so convinced he would melt down about my break-in that I was still on edge waiting for it to happen. But he seemed earnest, so I decided to give it a whirl.

  “I’m not an expert on psychological conditions,” I said finally. “I took a psychology class when I was a freshman, but not much of it stuck.”

  “Fair enough. I don’t need the right words. I simply want to hear your opinion.”

  “She was crazy.”

  Jack’s lips twitched. “That seems ... clinical.”

  “She had issues,” I clarified. “She thought she was the center of the universe, that people were trying to emulate her at the same time they were trying to tear her down. There was a divide in her thinking that didn’t make sense. If people were jealous and wanted to be like her, why were they so upset about the things she was doing?

  “I saw some of the instances of online bullying Lily and Sarah mentioned,” I continued. “She was horrible ... and relentless. She worked her little group of flying monkeys — I think that’s what they called them, and it fits — into a frenzy in those messages. She told them that her enemies were taking food out of the mouths of her children, made up a bunch of stories about her children being sick even though there were no medical bills in her email, and basically unleashed a group of people who were only operating on one side of a ve
ry ridiculous story based solely upon her rather dubious word. I can see why people were terrified to go against her, and why the flood gates essentially opened when one person was brave enough to take a stand.”

  Jack grabbed a breadstick from the basket at the center of the table. “I think that’s a pretty apt judgment. Anything else?”

  I felt emboldened. “She’s a grifter.”

  Jack’s eyebrows flew up his forehead. “Care to expound on that?”

  “She doesn’t care like the others,” I explained. “She takes no pride in her work ... other than what it can get her. She’s built a publishing persona — this Shayne Rivers person who is kind and cares about her fellow writers. Couldn’t be further from the truth. She’s not a writer so much as a con artist.

  “I think, if we dig deep enough into Elsie May’s background we’ll find a laundry list of things she’s done in other groups,” I continued. “Being a writer wasn’t the first scam she ran. She’s too good at it. That means there are others in her past. Perhaps she was one of those eBay scammers who were on the news, or maybe she ran grifts in person and that’s how her family survived for a bit.”

  Jack beamed. “That was very good. I think you’re absolutely right. Before we head to karaoke, I’m starting a search on Elsie May and her husband. If she’s run more scams than this — and I’m betting the trademark thing plays into her overall goals — then her list of enemies is probably even greater than we thought.”

  I tried not to bask in the glow of his grin. “How would the trademark thing be a scam?”

  “They’re referred to in some circles as ‘trademark whores,’” he replied, rubbing his foot against mine under the table and causing me to grin like an idiot. “People file for trademarks they believe will be of value, and then it becomes their job to protect the trademark. Ultimately, the plan is to force someone else to pay to use the trademark.

  “So, if it takes a couple of hundred dollars to file for the trademark, they’ll sell it — or use of it — for thousands of dollars to make life difficult for other people,” he continued. “This doesn’t just happen in writing. It happens with other businesses, and people make real money doing it. I believe Shayne Rivers simply modified the concept.”

  “Huh.” I rubbed my chin. “If she has something really bad in her past we might’ve been wasting time from the start. I mean ... maybe someone took advantage of her travel schedule and exacted revenge for a grudge from a long time ago.”

  “See, you’re so smart.” His smile was back as he tapped the side of his head for emphasis. “You do extremely idiotic things sometimes, but you’re very smart. Has anyone ever told you that?”

  I shrugged. “I’m smart enough to know that we shouldn’t go to karaoke. You need to take my word for it.”

  “Oh, we’re going to karaoke.”

  My smile slipped. “I’m not singing.”

  “You’re singing.”

  “No, I’m not.”

  “Yes, you are.”

  I had news for him. I drew the line at singing in public. There was absolutely nothing he could say to talk me into it. I didn’t care how handsome he was. “I’ll sing if you sing,” I said finally.

  Jack straightened. “I don’t sing.”

  “Then I don’t sing.”

  “We’ll just see about that.”

  We definitely would.

  IT TURNED OUT KARAOKE was more fun than I envisioned. I didn’t sing — which was a relief for everyone, even if they didn’t know it — but Jack and I had a good time.

  Lily and Sarah included us with their group, which happened to be the center of attention. Most of the people we’d been looking at as suspects were there, except for Clark. His absence didn’t go unnoticed.

  “Where is the guy with the obnoxious shirts?” I asked Lily as she delivered a tray of drinks to the table.

  “You’ll have to be more specific,” she said, smiling. “Half the people here wear obnoxious shirts ... including Sarah.”

  She said the second part for Sarah’s benefit, because the pimento-cheese-loving woman faked indignity.

  “My shirts are awesome,” Sarah countered, smoothing her T-shirt. It featured a smiling kitten face and the phrase “show me your kitties.” She didn’t seem embarrassed to be wearing it in the least. “Lily just wishes she was cool enough to wear a shirt like this.”

  “Uh-huh.” I wasn’t convinced. “I was talking about the guy you said had a prostitute at the tiki bar the other night. Clark Savage. He’s the only one in your group who isn’t here. That other prepper guy is here, although he seems happiest sitting outside where it’s cooler.”

  “Clark is ... an ass,” Lily said after a beat, making me smile at her bluntness. “Be glad he’s not here. He would bring everyone down if he was allowed to sit in a corner and rail against women ... and minorities ... and old people. I don’t think he likes anyone but himself, but I’ve learned to keep my mouth shut where he’s concerned.”

  I was officially intrigued. “He hates minorities, too? I mean ... I knew he hated women. I’ve heard stories about it. That’s one of the reasons he fought with Shayne, right?”

  Lily wasn’t stupid. She recognized I was digging for information. Instead of immediately answering, she glanced around. I had no idea who she was looking for, but when her eyes landed on Abigail and Priscilla her expression darkened and she motioned for me to follow her outside.

  I did without hesitation, carrying my drink to the patio. Jack was still inside — he’d made friends with a high fantasy author with an outgoing personality — but I wasn’t worried about him assuming I’d left. He’d be able to see me through the bar’s windows.

  Lily selected a small table at the back of the patio. I had to admit, the breeze felt nice. Getting a reprieve from the singing was also nice.

  “I had no idea there were so many enthusiastic singers in your group,” I noted as Lily sipped a rum runner. They appeared to be the drink of choice at the resort.

  “Karaoke is an acquired taste,” she explained. “I never acquired it. My friends were more the ‘let’s get drunk in a field’ variety, and I couldn’t understand why the writers I made friends with were so excited to sing the first year we attended this conference. It certainly wasn’t my thing.”

  “Obviously you got over your aversion.”

  “I did,” Lily agreed, smirking. “I don’t sing, but others do. They enjoy it. The line is long and not everyone will get to belt out a tune. You will find more people willing to give it a shot as the night progresses, mostly fueled by free alcohol. Even Jezebel, who wouldn’t know a high note from a low blow, will give it a shot. She’ll pick a song that makes you want to slit your wrists and everyone will laugh at her, but she likes attention so she’ll try it.”

  I stared at her for an extended period of time and sipped my drink. She knew something. Or maybe she wanted to share something, but didn’t want to volunteer it. She wanted me to drag it out of her. Perhaps that was her way of protecting herself.

  “We found out some interesting information about Shayne Rivers today,” I offered, watching her closely for a reaction. “It seems she has something of a past when it comes to ripping people off.” Now, to be fair, that was an exaggeration. Jack and I theorized that was true, but we had no proof of it. Still, I wanted to feel out Lily for her opinion on the subject.

  “Really?” Lily’s eyes flashed with interest. “That doesn’t surprise me. I wish I could say it did, but ... no. She was too good at manipulating people. She didn’t stumble, led her followers straight to the trough of poisoned water, and convinced them to drink deeply. It makes sense that she’s done this before.”

  “She had a lot of enemies,” I noted. “A lot of people wanted her dead.”

  “Are you asking me if I wanted her dead?”

  “I’m not sure.” That was true. “You’re blunt, but you don’t seem the type to wish death on people. You’re more the type to wish a raging case of ass crabs on someo
ne.”

  Lily chuckled. “What are ass crabs?”

  “I read this story about people who pass out on the beach and crabs creep into crevices,” I replied. “Jack called them ass crabs. It kind of stuck.”

  Delighted, she belted out a laugh that echoed over the entire patio. “You’re blunt, too. I think that’s why I like you.”

  “Yeah, well, that doesn’t always work in my favor,” I said. “Sometimes I act before I think. Almost all the time I talk before I think.”

  “You’ll find that as you get older it’s okay to speak your mind,” she offered. “The older you get, the less you care about what others think of you. I certainly don’t care what others think of me. That doesn’t mean I say everything that comes to my mind. In fact, I tend to curb my impulses a good fifty percent of the time.”

  If that were true, she probably had some wild things she was keeping to herself because she didn’t seem the shy type. I found that funny. “Well, you can say whatever you want around me. I can’t be offended.”

  “Everyone can be offended.”

  “Not me.”

  “Everyone can be offended,” Lily repeated, sobering. “Even Shayne could be offended. She was doing most of the offending, mind you, but she wasn’t all bad. She donated money and time to an autism foundation because one of her kids was autistic. She also spoke out regularly on behalf of battered women. I might have disliked her a great deal, but I was behind both those efforts.”

  That was interesting. “You’re saying that Shayne was more than one thing.”

  “I’m saying that she was ninety-five percent crazy and five percent tolerable,” she corrected, causing me to smile. “I worry that in the aftermath of her death everyone is spending time talking about the things she did wrong. They were numerous, don’t get me wrong, but she did a few things right.

  “Besides that, no one deserves to die like that,” she continued. “To be eaten alive by sharks ... that’s the most terrible death I can imagine.”

  I could imagine a few more, but my mind was a freaky place at times. I thought about telling Lily that we had no way of knowing how Shayne died, but I was quick enough to realize that would be a terrible idea. It was better to keep her cause of death murky.