by Ali Carter
An energy bar would be good, I wanted to say, but instead I asked if there were a couple of objects I could borrow for a still life.
‘Yes,’ said Zoe getting up. ‘Let’s go and dig out some china.’
We found a sage green jug and a cerulean blue vase and I took them to the music room and arranged them on a high table ready for class.
Zoe popped her head around the door. ‘Susie,’ she said, ‘as everyone’s a little tired this morning I’ve suggested a quick blast of fresh air. Would you like to come?’
I gritted my teeth. Zoe was about to delay my class.
‘You don’t have to,’ she said. ‘Jane’s staying here but the rest of us are going to brave the elements. Fergus wants to check on how high the river is.’
‘I see,’ I said, thinking, if Jane’s the only one here, I can catch her alone.
I followed Zoe out of the room and into the hall.
‘I don’t think I’ll come if that’s okay?’
‘Of course, Susie,’ she smiled, and flung open the front door. Haggis yelped with excitement at being outside. Everyone else trundled after them, all dressed in wet-weather gear.
As soon as they’d left, I scampered upstairs and knocked on Jane’s door.
‘Yes?’
‘Hi Jane, would you mind if I came in?’
‘Why would I mind?’
I stepped into the room and got straight to the point. ‘I know Shane spoke out of turn at breakfast, but I’d like to know why you were in my room.’
‘Was I? I simply can’t remember.’ She plonked herself down on the bed.
‘It was before class on Tuesday morning,’ I said, leaving her in no doubt of the exact timing.
‘Is that what Shane was on about?’
‘Yes. What were you up to?’ I sat down on the bed opposite, hoping if I settled in she would talk.
‘Hmmm…I remember now, I did wander down the children’s corridor. Briefly, yes, I spoke to Mhàiri.’
‘Why were you down there?’
‘That’s right, I was looking for you.’
‘But you knew I’d gone for a walk with Rupert.’
‘Did I?’ Her voice was steady but her pursed hands were now trembling.
‘Yes, we discussed it at breakfast.’
Silence.
‘Why were you in my room?’
She didn’t answer. ‘Please tell me.’
‘There’s nothing to tell.’
Her lips tightened. She was getting on my nerves.
‘I don’t believe you,’ I said.
‘It’s none of your business.’
‘It is, you were in my room.’
Her head dipped. I think a vulnerable side is surfacing.
‘You can trust me, honestly you can,’ I said, towing a sympathetic line.
I wanted to get to the truth.
Her expression gave briefly and I leapt in. ‘I think you found something under my floorboard. Am I right?’
Bingo, Jane’s shoulders slumped; I’ve almost broken her.
‘Have you been here before?’ I asked, thinking, why not get all my questions out at once?
‘Why are you pushing me like this?’ she moaned.
‘I don’t like to be lied to.’
We had eye contact again.
‘I’m not lying.’
‘Not answering is as good as lying.’ I repeated the question, ‘Have you been here before?’
‘Yes,’ she mumbled and stared at the floor.
Mhàiri was right.
‘And you knew there was something hidden in my room?’
Silence.
‘Jane?’
She sat up with a second wind. ‘Stop sticking your nose into my business.’
Help, she had a point. Blackmail is now my only option.
‘I’m going to speak to Zoe about this.’
‘Good god, girl, don’t do that.’
I held Jane’s stare until she gave in.
‘I came to stay with my parents when I was very young,’ she whispered, ‘they were friends of Fergus’s father, it was before he was born.’
On Jane went, sharing her secret. ‘I was sleeping down the children’s corridor and was woken suddenly in the middle of the night. My parents and Fergus’s had been to a party. I never liked staying here. This house frightened me as a child and when Fergus’s father came into my room, it terrified me.’
I felt a pang of guilt for drawing this out of her. But I now wanted to know more.
‘Poor you,’ I said. ‘What was he doing?’
‘It was an awful experience. I hid under the duvet as he made all sorts of noises, lifting a floorboard up.’
‘Didn’t he know you were in there?’
‘Too blotted to have a clue. He was an alcoholic, you know. The next day he treated me all normal. He never recalled a thing.’
Jane went on. ‘He was stuffing that,’ she pointed at the portrait, ‘necklace in and stamping down the board again.’
Wow. I had found a diamond for sure and it dawned on me that if Jane now knew what he was putting under the floorboard, she must have the necklace.
‘You’ve got the necklace?’
‘I came here to get my own back.’ Her voice was full of confidence again and I felt strangely flattered she’d told me the truth.
‘How did you know it would still be there?’
‘I was certain. I’ve never breathed a word about that night.’
‘So, it wasn’t stolen?’
‘As good as.’
‘But it wasn’t.’
‘Fergus doesn’t know that and don’t you go telling tales.’
‘It’s stealing.’
Crumbs, I’m an accessory-after-the-fact to a serious crime. What am I going to do?
‘Hush, girl. You don’t know the full story.’ Jane put her fingers to her lips at which point the bedroom door flew open. ‘Felicity! Susie was just leaving.’
‘I hope you had a good walk?’ I said.
Felicity’s hair needed a good brush.
‘Oh, we did, it was marvellous.’
I stepped out of the room, wondering why it had taken Jane so many years to return. And…I don’t want to believe it, but…did Jane use Felicity’s sob story as a way of securing her place on the course?
It’s not in my nature to snitch and if I told Zoe and Fergus about the necklace now, I would be doing just that. Jane’s right, I don’t know the full story…yet.
Louis was last through the music room door and I told him to tag his easel on the end of the semi-circle around the still life.
Where on earth am I going to drum up the energy to get through this?
‘Susie,’ said Rupert. ‘Why don’t I make some space and move my easel in front of the window there.’
‘No.’
‘That’s me told.’
‘Oh, sorry, but you’ll get in the way of the light falling on the objects. I want it very bright on one side.’
‘Miss, can we have music again?’
‘Do we have to?’ said Minty. ‘My ears are still ringing from last night.’
‘Me too,’ agreed Felicity.
‘Let’s not. We’ve got to get going. Secure your primed paper on your easel…’
‘I do hate primed paper,’ interrupted Giles.
‘Well, you have to use it today as the paint will dry quicker than on canvas.’
‘Why does that matter?’
‘So as tomorrow you can glaze on top of what you paint today.’
‘What’s that?’ said Rupert.
‘Tomorrow we’ll do what we do tomorrow, but today I’m going to teach you about a trick of the light. Please get out four tubes of paint: zinc white, titanium white, ivory black and sepia.’
‘Will this be a tonal painting?’ said Minty.
‘Yes, similar to the fountain you did yesterday. I’m going to show you a method I learnt at the Ruskin.’
‘You went to the Ruskin?’ Minty sounded ful
l of surprise.
If you’ve been to the Slade or Ruskin, people always sound surprised. It’s an indirect compliment in a funny sort of way.
‘Didn’t you read the brochure?’ said Louis. ‘Susie’s talented, you know.’
I quickly moved on. ‘This method’s good but it’s by no means the only way.’ I smiled to show I meant it. ‘Great masters of chiaroscuro like Rembrandt and Goya stuck to it.’
‘Well, it must be the best then,’ said Giles.
‘Don’t be stupid,’ said Louis. ‘There are many other skilful ways to paint. Which is what Susie has been saying.’
‘Really?’
‘Yes, Impressionism for example. Or Pointillism, since you ask.’
‘Why are you teaching us kiro scuro then, Miss?’
‘I’m just showing you an option. One that focuses on light.’
‘What?’ said Shane, staring blankly out of the window.
‘It’s the reflection of light that lets us see everything around us, and a trick of the light means what you are seeing is actually an effect caused by the way light falls. If you get to grips with this, you’ll be well on the way to understanding and working out how and why things appear as they do.’
‘Heavens above, Susie,’ said Rupert, ‘what do you mean?’
‘I mean, forget about the images of jugs and vases you already have in your mind. I want you to record the facts in front of you. Only the facts, as they exist. You probably think the jug is green and the vase is blue, but if you look hard you’ll realise you’ve jumped to a false conclusion. The evidence says differently.’
Just as Jane’s lips parted I said, ‘Look at the sides of the objects closest to the window – what colour are they?’
Shane squinted. ‘White, Miss.’
‘Exactly. The objects aren’t white in our mind, but here, in front of us, there’s no denying it. It’s very easy to take sight for granted but you must be led by your eyes not your mind.’
‘Beyond me,’ said Felicity. ‘But I’ll give it a go.’
‘To really stretch the point, we’re going to forget about colour today and concentrate on tone. It’s all about defining the light.’
Minty was nodding in my favour.
Here goes… ‘I want you to use sepia to knock in the tonal values on your canvas, always working from dark to light, leaving only the area of white on your canvas where the light is hitting your subject. You then build form on this underpainting. Once this is bone dry, i.e. tomorrow, you’ll mix the colours and brush them over your tones. This then…’
‘Whooooa, hang on a minute,’ said Rupert. ‘You’re going a bit fast.’
‘Very fast,’ said Giles.
‘Yes, Susie,’ said Felicity. ‘Any chance you could explain it a little more clearly? You are an awfully good tutor but that sounded terribly difficult.’
‘I think it’s safe to say,’ grumbled Jane, ‘we were all lost in your explanation.’
‘Why don’t you show us how it’s done?’ suggested Lianne.
Louis offered me his easel and paper and set another up for himself. I shifted forward so everyone could watch me and work behind – no time left this morning for a full demonstration.
‘Do you all understand what I mean when I say white is warm when sunlight hits it?’
‘Not much of that here,’ said Jane.
‘As a matter of fact, natural light is sunlight.’
‘Well, I didn’t understand what you meant.’
‘No, I don’t think I did either,’ said Felicity.
Louis gave me a sympathetic smile and I moved towards the high table, hoping if I pointed at what I meant, it would make things clearer.
‘The sides of the objects closest to the window have most light on them. Here. The sides of the objects furthest from the window have the least light. Here. Zinc white is warm and titanium white is cold. So, when you are painting the lightest side of the jug and the vase you will use zinc white because natural light is warm.’
‘What about the shadow?’ said Felicity.
‘We’ll get to the shadow, but for the time being these dark sides of the objects are not hit by sunlight and are therefore cold, so when mixing their tone you’ll use titanium white.’
‘I’m going to write this down,’ said Lianne.
‘That’s a terribly good idea,’ said Felicity, reaching for her sketchpad.
‘It’s ridiculously confusing,’ said Jane.
Louis stepped forward and squeezed my shoulder.
Jane tut-tutted. I sighed. I wanted to scream: ‘Listen carefully and concentrate.’
Oh dear, have I lost them? I’m a sucker for a thorough understanding. I really relish getting to the root of a problem. I like things to be proven before I buy into the result, and there are few things I enjoy more than studying life. Whether that be tricks of the light or tricky characters.
I tried to calm Jane. ‘I’ll talk you through the mixes and the easiest way to go about that is to work from dark to light. The further away from the sunlight the colder the tone. The blackest black, ivory black, is used for where light never goes.’
‘There,’ said Felicity, pointing to the correct place at last.
‘Yes, and as the shadow extends it gets lighter. This cast shadow is a mixture of ivory black, zinc white and a hint of sepia.’
Lianne caught my eye. ‘How do you spell that last one?’
‘Any way you want,’ said Shane
I laughed; fundamentally he’s right. ‘S E P I A.’
‘And where’s the name from, Susie?’ asked Rupert.
‘Originally, the ink came from the sac of a cuttlefish – sepia in Greek.’
‘Yuck,’ said Lianne.
‘Oooh,’ said Felicity.
‘Hang on a minute,’ snapped Jane. ‘You are going to show us how it’s done, aren’t you?’
‘I’m just about to.’
I’m exhausted. It’s partly my fault for undertaking such an ambitious lesson but I so want to open everyone’s eyes. Finally the questions have stopped and hard work has started so I’m going to leave them to it and grab five minutes alone in my room.
I face-planted my pillow. Blast Jane, she’s testing my morals and it’s wearing me out. I was in a similar circumstance only last week. One where I didn’t know the full story. I’d gone on a blind date for dinner in Brighton, and across the restaurant I’d seen a friend, Ross. He was with a woman who was not his wife. I went straight up to say hello. They had menus in front of them, their food hadn’t come yet, but I noticed the cutlery was ruffled on his left and her right. Drawing a swift but unfounded conclusion, I was pretty sure this pair had been holding hands. His reluctance to chat suggested it too.
It was upsetting to see a friend possibly cheating on his wife but it would have been presumptuous of me to tell her, Mary, without knowing the truth. She would have been terribly upset and where was the happiness in that? Instead, I rang Ross at work and put him under pressure to do the right thing. He insisted his relationship with the stranger was platonic and this I wanted to believe. However, I left him in no doubt how upset I was to come across him in a situation like this and hung up, leaving him to sort it out.
Right now, face down on my bed, I’m reminding myself: it’s better to encourage the person in the wrong to do the right thing than go behind their back. My conundrum with Jane is: she’s convinced she deserves the diamonds and I just don’t know where that’s coming from. Pure greed…or something else?
I went back to the music room and wrapped up the class.
‘It’s lunchtime.’
‘Finally,’ said Shane. ‘I’m starving.’
‘I’ll race you to the dining room,’ said Giles.
‘First, you must clear up, clean your brushes, stack the easels, carry your paintings down to the basement and then you can go to lunch.’
‘Oh, Miss. Really.’
‘How did I do today?’ said Rupert, showing me his picture.
&nb
sp; ‘Very good,’ I lied. ‘There’s certainly enough to go on tomorrow.’
‘Where in the basement are we going?’ said Felicity.
‘The drying room so your pictures can dry.’
‘Of course, how clever.’
Zoe and Fergus were already in the dining room when we arrived, piling shepherd’s pie onto plates and putting them round the table. I made sure I sat a long way away from Jane. I couldn’t bear to be near her right now.
‘Can I have a small one, please?’ said Minty.
Zoe spooned a final portion onto a plate and sat down.
‘What are we doing this afternoon, Miss?’
‘Drawing from paintings in the house.’
‘Like copying?’
‘It’s called an equivalent not a copy.’
‘Right you are then.’
Louis gave me a cheeky wink.
‘Which paintings?’ said Felicity.
‘You can choose whatever you like.’
‘Just one?’
‘Yes, just one, in pencil on paper.’
‘I think it’s such a good idea of Susie’s,’ said Fergus. ‘You can’t possibly work outside in this weather.’ He turned to look out of the window. ‘That reminds me. Darling, you said you were going to look up tomorrow’s weather?’
‘Yes, I should have said, it’s going to remain below freezing with a brief spell of sun in the morning.’
‘Brrr.’ Felicity’s whole upper body shook.
‘Good lord,’ said Rupert, ‘Jules will never forgive me if I don’t get home to help with the dogs.’ He looked genuinely worried.
‘And I’m meant to be going skiing on Saturday.’ Giles’s shoulders slumped.
‘Don’t worry,’ said Zoe. ‘I’ve spoken to the airline and your flight’s been rescheduled for the morning. Porridge and toast in here from seven and Donald will take you to the airport at eight.’
‘How brilliant of you,’ said Felicity.
‘Well, I’d hate to think of you stuck up here.’
‘Yeah,’ said Shane. ‘I like it and all but I want to get home.’
‘You will. Inverness only has two flights south a day. The airport is quite used to bringing the evening one forward when the weather’s bad.’
‘This means we won’t get to finish our pictures,’ groused Minty.