by Ruby Brooks
“You know, I have fantasised about this hair many times,” he said against my lips.
“My hair?”
“Yes,” he purred. “What it would be like to wrap it around my hands and pull when I am inside you.” He tugged at the strands curled up in his fingers, making me gasp.
“Shall we find out?”
✽✽✽
“Carl has no idea about that mission,” Cole admitted, as we walked to training.
“Okay. I was about to tear Carl a new one for excluding me.”
“What happened between you two?”
I sighed. “He tried to come onto me. I threatened him and told him I better be on the next mission.”
“You know, I’m starting to like this new side of you.”
“Oh?”
“I always knew you had it in you, but seeing you like this… I love it.”
I smiled to myself. “Thanks?”
“You’re welcome, Hales,” he rested his hand on my lower back for a moment before we came into sight of the training room, where we separated again. “Tell me if you need me to step in.”
“I want Andrew again,” I said under my breath so only Cole could hear as we entered the room. Andrew was smirking at us, bouncing his eyes between us.
“Why?”
“So I can scare him. I’m sick of feeling like I’m on eggshells around him and it’s about time I proved what would happen if he crossed me.”
“Enjoy,” Cole said, winking. I felt myself flush under his approval as we all began to warm up.
Carl had hand-to-hand combat planned for a mission that was happening tonight. It was for packless or clanless shifters and I was looking forward to it. I needed to prove to Carl that I was good enough for it.
I grabbed Andrew before he could try and pair off with someone else.
“We have to talk,” I snapped. Despite the fact I felt stronger, I still took us over to a mat next to Cole who was with one of Andrew’s friends. I felt safer with him there to back me up if I needed it.
“What about?” Andrew eyed me curiously. “You seem different.”
“Being beaten up in the middle of the night does that to a woman.”
He smirked. “You deserved it. I’m the one—”
“Who’s in charge. Yeah, if you haven’t noticed, I don’t give a shit.” Before he could come up with another retort, I punched him.
He recovered quickly and we began fighting, causing everyone to stop what they were doing to watch us. I could feel Cole’s eyes on me and my sensitive hearing picked up what he was saying.
“His left side is open.”
I went for it and Andrew faltered giving me more openings.
“Enough,” Carl said, stepping between us. “Hayley, I think you’re ready.”
I heard Cole let out a low snarl as Carl’s hand was on my shoulder. I yanked it out of his grip as he gave me a sly smile.
“I get to go onto tonight’s mission?” I asked.
“Yeah. After this display here… Yeah,” he nodded to Andrew who was sprawled on the floor, giving me a look of death. I smiled and crouched down in front of him as Carl walked away, barking orders at everyone who stood to watch.
“I warned you this would happen,” I said, keeping my voice low. “This is only the start.”
As I rose, I checked to make sure Carl wasn’t looking before kicking Andrew in the face, the same way he did to me after his late-night visit. Cole gave me a slight nod in approval before positioning himself in front of me.
“What have I told you before about your feet positioning?” He grabbed my hips, rearranging my stance. It took me back to the times he used to teach me and I knew he was thinking the same when he caught my gaze.
With a gentle squeeze, he let go, and we began training.
✽✽✽
As we walked out of the room, Micah was waiting for me and I let out a groan.
“Problem?” Cole asked me.
“No, it doesn’t matter. Micah usually escorts me to the labs.”
Micah eyed the two of us and, when he noticed Cole wasn’t leaving, I nudged him. He gave me one last look before walking down the corridor, leaving me alone with Micah. I just knew he was hidden around the corner, listening.
“About what I said before—”
“Save it. I don’t really want to talk about it. Can we go now?”
“Alright,” Micah shoved his hands in his pockets as we walked, a defeated look on his face.
“What kind of torture am I in for today?” I asked, trying to break the tension.
“I’m glad you asked,” Nathan said, appearing around the corner with Cole in tow. There were other staff members too, and I gulped. “You two have been caught getting close. Torture is exactly what I have in mind.”
I gasped as Cole gave me an unreadable look. My heart rate picked up especially when I noticed Micah blanch.
“Relax,” Cole whispered. His voice was so quiet his lips barely moved. “Remember what we discussed.”
I didn’t know if I could trust Nathan though, even if he did have an agreement with Cole. I chewed on my lip, my body shaking as we were led into a room. The staff members with Nathan all wore lab coats and I wondered if they were the developers of the substance that subdued our animals.
My wolf stirred, desperate to break free. She didn’t want to be chained up anymore.
Cole will protect us, I promised, hoping to bring some kind of comfort. My wolf settled immediately, and I thought about Cole’s confession.
He told me he loves me.
I looked over at him. His jaw was clenched, his hands curled into fists. When he caught me looking, he winked.
Right. We had to pretend this was scaring us. That this was going to hurt.
“Get on the counter, Hayley. We’ll do your top up first.”
“He doesn’t know,” Cole whispered for only my ears. “Do not fight me.”
I did what Nathan asked, the metal cool against my back. I tried to calm down and I felt it when Cole was using his influence on me. It was like a pressure on my chest, forcing me to submit. I felt my wolf disconnect and tried not to panic.
The staff smiled at the way I was shaking. I fucking hated this place and the people in it, and I couldn’t wait to destroy it.
Nathan pulled up my sleeve and slid the needle into my arm. In the past I could feel an icy sensation running through my veins, but this time I felt nothing. There was a liquid of some kind, but it wasn’t affecting me.
I squeezed my eyes shut, pretending it did.
“What is that?” a voice said. It must have belonged to one the staff members, because I didn’t recognise it.
“It is a substance I created. It disconnects the shifter from their animal side. Quite effective, wouldn’t you say, Cole?”
“Yes,” Cole hissed. The anger in his voice made me shiver and I didn’t think it was entirely an act.
“Does it hurt?” the staff member asked again.
I began crying. I don’t know what prompted me to do it, but I let the tears fall. “It hurts so much,” I said, before I burst into sobs. I was shaking and sniffling everywhere. Nathan shoved a tissue into my hand so I could blow my nose, but the tears kept on coming.
“My God. Can you get that in a dart? We could trial it tonight,” the staff all murmured in agreement and Nathan started nodding.
“I will get to work. The punishment will have to wait until another time. I need peace and quiet to work.”
Cole rushed over to me, wrapping an arm around me. “Shh, it’s okay sweetie.”
Sweetie?
“Urgh,” one of the staff members said in disgust. “We need to revisit the rules.”
The others mumbled their agreement and Nathan kicked them out. I buried my face into Cole’s neck until they left and we gave them a minute head start before leaving.
“The dart thing is a good idea,” Nathan commented while we waited, his back to us as he tinkered with glass vials. “We w
ill trial it on you first, Cole. But it won’t be ready tonight.”
Cole nodded and pushed me out of the room. The anger I was feeling from him this time was no longer just an act.
“Great crying, by the way. What is all part of the act?” Cole asked as we wandered down to my room.
“No. Well, maybe. But it was everything. You coming here has been… overwhelming.”
He wrapped an arm around my shoulder and kissed my temple. “I know.”
“I want to talk to you. Properly, this time.”
“Sure,” he sighed, bracing himself for my questioning.
Chapter 20
Cole
As soon as the door clicked shut, Hayley whirled around to face me, her face like thunder. This was the conversation we were meant to have the first time we saw each other and now I wished I was anywhere else.
“I know about your parents,” she snapped. “Why didn’t you tell me?”
“I was—” I cleared my throat. I didn’t know what to say. “I was going to tell you.”
“But?”
“But I was afraid that if I told you, you wouldn’t look at me the same way.”
“I found out in a diary. Upstairs, in a fucking trophy cabinet,” she shook her head. “Did you really think I wouldn’t find out?”
“Hayley—” I reached out for her, but she stepped out of my way. Granted, I deserved it, but it still stung.
“Does Kian know?”
“No.”
“How? You two have been best friends since childhood. Surely he would have noticed that your parents had changed?”
“He never visited. I spent most of my life growing up in the pack house, or at yours.”
“It’s crazy. Why did you do it?”
“You know why.” I wanted to get closer, but I knew she needed this moment to be mad at me. I crossed my arms and leaned against the wall instead to give myself something to do.
“Because of your dad,” she whispered. “There’s more to it, isn’t there?”
“Yes,” I may as well tell her the whole story at this point. “My parents were awful, Hayley. I know that is no excuse for what I did, but my wolf… I think you were right. I know I’m too young for this, but I think it was the early signs of the alpha curse. Fuck me, Hales, I struggle in training and I fake that.”
“I thought you were dead. I’ve been here for a year, Cole. And you haven’t even got a solid plan to get us out. If the Steelman pack is the strongest in the country, where are they?”
“I have been asking myself the same thing. I am furious at Tristan for not doing enough for you, and he probably has his reasons, but I had to get out of there and find you myself. My biggest regret is not doing it sooner.”
She chewed on her lip, her eyebrows pulled down. I stepped towards her, drawn to her like a moth to a flame. I tipped her chin up with my fingers and looked into her eyes.
“For what it’s worth, I did it for you. I know it doesn’t condone it, but everything I have ever done has been in order to protect you. If I had known… I knew my parents were up to something. If I had known in advance that it would have affected you, I’d have done what I did much sooner.”
“I hate this. All of it. The fact you knew,” she ran her hand through her hair in frustration, tears slipping down her cheeks. “I know you, Cole, and I believe what you say. I just wish it wasn’t like this.”
“Me neither. If I had it my way, none of this shit would have ever touched you. You must hate me now, and I don’t blame you.”
“When did I ever say I hated you? I’m hurt, angry, and disappointed, but I never said I hated you. You can always make it up to me when we get out of here,” she shrugged. “In fact, let’s start with how are we going to get out? Don’t think this means I have forgiven you.”
“I don’t expect you to and I’m working on it.” Or trying to, at least. I really hoped that stray wolf pulled through for me.
“Are you?” Her brows raised. “I have accepted the fact I’m going to die here. I almost already did.”
“What? Was that when Andrew attacked you?”
“No. If they wanted to kill me that night, I’d be dead. Before you came here, they wanted to stop using me for whatever experiments they run here and I begged to go out on missions. It is the only reason I’m allowed to train.”
I wanted the ground to swallow me up. I was almost too late to save her.
“Pull yourself together,” my wolf snapped.
Hayley heard it, too, and tried to stifle a smile. “At least you two talk.”
“Give it time. Your wolf will come back to you.”
“This plan then, what is it?”
I rubbed at my chin. “It’s not great. I know how to get back to my pack from here, but I don’t know how to get us out of here exactly. When we go for missions, they knock us out and put us in the back of a truck. While I can get around the tranquillisers, I haven't been able to see anything that is going on.”
“Oh,” she sighed, flopping onto the bed. “You shouldn’t have come here. You should have moved on, found someone else.”
“Not bloody likely,” I sat down on the bed next to her, reaching into my pocket. “Do you have any idea the sort of fights this ring has gotten into? The fact it is still intact says to me that this thing that has been between us is real. Maybe I’m just a sap, but I believe in it.”
Her eyes lit up when she noticed the promise ring I had given her. It felt like a lifetime ago. “Cole, you kept it?”
“Of course I did,” she sat up and I put it on around her neck. “I never gave up on you, not for a second.”
She was quiet for a moment, admiring it while I admired her. Maybe I should have moved on because maybe I will die here, but it was all worth it.
“How do you get around the tranquillisers?” she asked.
“In the same way as though other substances. I get my wolf to protect me. You can do it, too.”
“I don’t think I’m strong enough for that.”
“Hayley, you are more than strong enough. The fact you doubt yourself means I haven’t been doing my job properly.”
“You’re right,” she commented, as though a switch had flipped. I wasn’t going to question it though. “I am strong enough. Tonight, on this mission, why don’t we run away? We can do it, you and I.”
The fire was back in her eyes and I hated to snuff it out so soon. “I’ve already thought of that. We go out to do the mission, but there are other hunters monitoring us. I think it must be some part of the recruitment process into the main branch. I also don’t know where that is based.”
“There are so many unknowns,” she said, still playing with the ring. “I think we should try it. I don’t believe by sitting around here that someone is going to come for us.”
“It worked for you,” I pointed out.
“Because you love me,” she giggled, nudging my shoulder. My shoulders lightened along with her mood. “Tell me about your pack.”
“Our pack,” I corrected. “I don’t know them yet. I know I saved them, though. I’ve also not felt any deaths.” In fact, I felt nothing. The thrum of the bond was there, and I knew I had power over something, but there wasn’t much else to it. I wish I had spoken to Tristan about this a long time ago.
“Saved them from what?” she finally looked at me.
“The same abuse I faced as a kid.” Her breath caught, but I cut her off before she could give me any more of her pity. “Please, don’t say anything about it. I just want to get back to them and help them. It isn’t about me anymore. It never was.”
Hayley rested her head on my shoulder and closed her eyes. I wanted to ask her if she loved me too, but that was the one thing I didn’t dare ask. We stayed like that for a while as we waited for Micah to arrive, escorting us to where we needed to be.
“I don’t like him,” I commented.
“Relax, Cole. He is harmless.”
I watched as Micah left his eyes on her for a mome
nt too long. I squashed down the jealousy before it could manifest itself and drag me down with it.
✽✽✽
Hayley managed to suppress the tranquilliser without any issues, but I had to get her to calm down in the back of the van. Her leg was bouncing hard, like it always did when she was nervous, and I couldn’t afford to let her draw attention to us.
It had only just crossed my mind now that this would be the first time in a year that she would be outside.
I tried to have sympathy, but I was terrified she would get us caught. I grabbed her leg and squeezed, hard, barely managing to get away with it. She stopped, but then her teeth began chattering.
At least I was the only one who could hear it.
We stopped a total of three times before we made onto a stretch of road and I wondered if that meant there were three sets of exits we had to use. They probably all had their own codes, too.
Fuck it. This was going to be impossible.
We pretended to be as drowsy as the others when we got out. I subtly inhaled the air for shifters. Hayley was in a group with Ella and Andrew, and I was with another group. I hated being separated from her, especially when she was with Andrew, but I tried not to let it bother me.
She is stronger than she used to be.
That is what I kept telling myself.
“Make it quick, everyone,” Carl muttered. “I want to go to sleep at a reasonable hour this time.”
I gave Hayley one last look before following my group into the forest. None of the shifters were here anymore, their scent was old. I knew we were in for a long night of failed sightings and I tried to stifle a groan.
“How did you end up here then?” the guy next to me asked. He was one of Andrew’s friends, so I took an instant dislike to him.
“The same way everyone else did,” I muttered. I was keeping one ear out to listen out for Hayley and wasn’t into small talk.
“Well, I’m Greg. I see you have been hanging around a lot with the Morton girl.”
“Don’t even go there,” I warned.
“I wasn’t,” he said, holding up his hands. “I was only going to say be careful.”