“Baby.” He curled a hand around the back of her neck, thumb brushing along the edge of her jaw. “I know.” Bending closer, he waggled his head, whispering, “And I don’t care.”
“Well, I do.” She straightened and pulled out of his grip, the rosy color on her cheeks deepening. “I’ll be right back.”
“Baby, just so you know—” He waited for her to look back at him. “I’m gonna need the room next, and I don’t care if you know. Wanna stay in there and chat with me? I’m cool with that.” Lifting a hand at the adorably horrified expression on her face, he grinned. “Not that I’m expecting that level of comfort with you yet. But just saying, when you get there, it’ll be no biggie.”
“Oh my God.” The scandalized whisper was tossed over her shoulder as she darted into the bathroom.
The door closed quietly. A moment later, the lock clicking was one of the loudest sounds he’d ever heard.
She’d locked him out.
With his jaw clenching tightly, he rubbed at his sternum where his chest burned.
She locked me out.
Frown creasing his brow, Einstein moved to the hallway and into the nursery, all set up and ready for Myrt and Bane’s newest addition. Quietly testing the knob on the connecting door, which turned easily in his hand, he nodded in satisfaction and waited for the tell-tale sounds to cease, followed by typical louder water noises. When the faucet for the sink turned on, he opened the door and pushed inside. Spots of water and soap suds dotted his shirt and vest when Marian whirled to face him, mouth open in shock as her wet hands rose in a protective gesture.
“Einstein—”
“Don’t lock me out, baby. I’ll always respect a closed door.” He tried not to let her see how he held back a sigh, chest still aching as he pushed down disappointment. “The fact you don’t already know that tells me a lot of things.”
“I didn’t—”
“I know, sweetie. I know.” He stepped across the small room and thumbed the lock, then opened the door, only then closing the way he’d entered. “Finish washing your hands. I’ll only be a minute, and we can go downstairs to get some food.”
Her head came up, mouth snapping closed as her jaw firmed. Einstein watched as she swallowed hard before turning back to the sink. Dashing her hands under the still-running water, she locked her gaze with his through the mirror’s reflection as she rinsed off the remaining suds. “It’s not like you to be cruel.”
“What?” He didn’t understand, but a gut-twisting feeling of guilt rushed over him.
Grabbing a hand towel crumpled on the countertop, Marian methodically wiped at her hands as she spoke. “Punishing me for something I didn’t know was a test isn’t fair. For the past few years, I’ve shared bathrooms with growing boys and grown men, and locking the door is a habit, not a statement. Before then, it was survival.” She tossed the towel back to the side of the sink as she turned to face him, head still held high. “The fact you don’t already know that tells me a lot of things.”
After throwing his words back in his face, she stepped backwards through the door, grabbing the edge. Just before it latched into place, she hesitated and broke the pose, head dipping. “The way you decided we couldn’t discuss it tells me more. Maybe I don’t know you like I thought I did.” Then the door closed as softly as it had before.
When he exited the bathroom a minute later, it was to find an empty room, no one waiting.
Chapter Eighteen
Marian
Three weeks later, Marian was not surprised to find that nothing about her life had changed.
She slept in the small downstairs room, alone.
She ferried the boys to their events, freeing Bane to stay with Myrt as she closed in on the last few days before the birth.
She worked, and the not changing thing had been harder here, because Noah wasn’t the same.
Marian had tried talking to him, the most recent time this morning when she arrived to find no customers inside the store. As before, he’d shut her down patiently and sweetly, but still relentlessly. From the expression on Monday’s face lately, she guessed she wasn’t the only one Noah was closing out.
Hands on her hips, she surveyed the workroom, satisfied with what she saw. All orders that had come in this morning were already filled, just waiting to be picked up or delivered. She dusted off a few stray pieces of greenery from her clothes and walked through to the front of the shop.
Noah stood near the window, a dusting rag in his hand that seemed to be forgotten. He was still and quiet, gaze pointed outside. Marian groaned, already knowing what had captured his attention.
Okay, maybe something had changed.
Stepping up beside him, she sighed. Noah wrapped an arm around her shoulders and tugged until she leaned against his side. “Your date’s here.”
Einstein was still in town, not having ridden out yet. He will, though. Given enough time, he’ll leave. As he always had.
“That’s his new usual.”
A bike was parked across the street, a familiar form still astride the seat.
“You need to let the man in, Marian.” She snorted, and Noah shook her lightly. “I’m serious. I don’t know what he did to anger you, but that man has more love and loyalty in his little finger than most people get to experience in a lifetime. At least talk to him.”
“I do talk to him. He’s just not interested in what I have to say.”
Since their argument the day after the kidnapping and subsequent rescue, an amalgamation of things Marian had dubbed The Event in her head, Einstein had been different. Initially Marian had been shocked at herself, at the outburst aimed at him, every sentence something her father would have dubbed back talk, a smack-worthy offense.
She’d gone downstairs and found Gunny, staying as close to him as possible. Even when Einstein had trailed down the stairs a few minutes later. The floaty feeling had been back, and Marian hadn’t tried to join any conversations, not liking how things wavered around the edges.
Having successfully avoided Einstein all day, she’d gone to bed early and, when she woke the following morning feeling completely normal, realized she must have still been feeling the effects of the drug.
Staying in the same house with him had been hard. But the alternative was unacceptable. Last week when she’d overheard him suggesting a move to Truck’s house instead, Marian had stormed around the corner and stalked right up to him. Finger poking into his chest, she’d let him know in no uncertain terms that he wasn’t going anywhere. Turning on her heel, she’d run in her retreat, moving fast, but not fast enough to miss Bane’s laughing response. “There’s your answer, brother. You’re stayin’ here.”
“Then show him how you feel without words.” Noah’s arm tightened when she would have moved away. “Marian, a blind man can see how much the two of you love each other. It breaks my heart that you’d let my stepbrother—” His voice broke, and he had to clear his throat before continuing. “That you’d let those assholes destroy something so beautiful. Don’t let them win, darling. Take your own life back.”
Watching Einstein as he guarded the shop, and by extension her, it occurred to her that Noah had a tiny bit of truth in his statement.
Before Scar had shown his hand and forced a reaction, she and Einstein had already been moving towards each other. Their relationship—and she didn’t try to deceive herself they weren’t in one—wasn’t built on lies, not at all. He had long been her best friend, someone she trusted with all her heart. Maybe The Event had pushed things onto a faster trajectory, but where they’d ended was the direction they’d been going all along.
She just needed to rewind them to where the pain between them wasn’t as prickly. They needed to regain the ease and friendship they’d shared.
“He’s my date.” Fingers playing with her bottom lip, Marian considered her options.
“That’s what I said.” Noah pushed her away playfully. “Go get your man, girlfriend.”
“Maybe I
will,” she sassed back, a smile breaking across her face, what felt like the first in weeks. “I need the afternoon off.”
Whirling on her heel, she ran to the workroom and grabbed a couple of things from her purse before stashing it under her normal station. She called out, “I won’t have my keys, so I can’t open in the morning.” Dashing off a quick text to Myrtle, she stopped in place, running her quickly devised plan back through her head. “I love him.” That last was a whisper, a reminder to herself of what was at stake. Softer, she repeated a version of Noah’s words, “Take my own life back.”
She gave Noah a wave as she moved through the shop and out the front door, the sweet tinkle of bells announcing her departure. Glancing left and right to ensure traffic remained nonexistent, she continued moving straight across the street. Einstein was seated on the bike, and the instant he appeared to realize her destination, his bootheels dropped from the highway bar mounted to the frame. They hit the ground at the same time she stopped directly next to him.
“Hi.”
“Hey, baby.” Over the past weeks, each time he’d slipped and used a sweet nickname for her, he’d looked hesitant and regretful. So this time, Marian’s eyes dipped closed to hide his expression, and she let the affection in his tone wash over her, bringing confidence and a resolve that this was what they needed.
She leaned towards him until his hand landed on her arm, steadying her. Blinking against the sunshine, she opened her eyes to find his gaze fixed on her mouth. Good. As she pressed closer, it was clear he didn’t realize her intention until her mouth touched his, the startled expression quickly morphing into that heated desire she wanted to see again and again.
Hand cupping her cheek, he murmured against her lips, “What are you doing, Marian?”
“We’re going on a date.” Choosing her words deliberately, she pulled back and moved to the saddlebag. Opening it, she brought out the helmet still stored there. For me. He’d turned to watch her, so she gave him a tiny smile as her fingers worked the clasp underneath her chin. “If you don’t have anything else to do?” She already knew he didn’t, because if she hadn’t approached him, he would have stayed here until closing time and then followed her home. That had been their routine for the past twenty-two days.
Mouth quirking to one side, he shook his head. “Not a damn thing worth doing. Where you wanna go?”
Darting from one side of the bike to the other, she used a gentle push with the toe of her shoe to lower the foot pegs. Back beside him, she refastened the latch on the saddlebag before climbing on. In stark contrast to their first ride, and many of the ones between then and now, she slipped extra close, spreading her knees wide to fit alongside his hips and thighs.
“Doesn’t matter.” Hands on his waist, she leaned close and rested the side of her helmet against his spine. “Long as I’m with you, I don’t care where we go, Jim.”
Silence spread around them, broken only by voices in the distance, children shouting as they played in the park. Tension slowly bled out of his muscles, and her body molded to his as he took in several deep breaths.
His muttered, “Alrighty then,” sounded loud to her ears. The bike engine started, rumbling noisily as Einstein gave the system a minute to warm up. His hands covered hers, fingers curling around to grip, and he tugged. She released her hold, following his lead, and when he placed them against his belly, low, just above his belt, she clutched at the fabric of his shirt. “Ready?”
Knowing he’d feel the movement, she simply nodded in response to the question called over his shoulder, then tightened her hold as they eased out into the street.
They rode for hours, not dismounting the bike even during refueling, Einstein maneuvering the beast close enough to the pump to conduct the entire transaction from his position between her legs. She liked the intimacy, liked even more his clear distaste for breaking their connection. Random thoughts threaded through her head as the wind and scenery rushed past. How she loved that this could become their normal, and how much she’d missed him helping her in the kitchen, the memory of his mouth against hers, chaste today, more erotic only a few weeks past.
Consciously setting aside the tiny bit of hurt that still hovered in the back of her mind, she focused on the feel of his muscles underneath her hands. If she wanted him to move past The Event, that meant she needed to understand things had also happened to him, and she needed to do the same. She’d lain in her bed and imagined his terror as Myrt had described it. How frantic he’d been, and the words of blame aimed at himself. The farther they rode, the more relaxed she became, making it easier to consider those terrifying hours.
For Marian, most of The Event was still a muddle of dark holes and vague memories, growing more tenuous as time passed. It was as if everything had happened to someone else, and Marian had only learned of it through a retelling. Einstein wouldn’t have that same buffer in his mind. Marian wondered if she’d somehow gotten the easier end of the deal, because with the amnesiac features of the drug, so much that should have been scarring was just nonexistent.
It was nearly nighttime when she popped her head up and looked over his shoulder just in time to see a county line marker approaching in the bike’s headlight. They were entering Blount County, and that triggered a tiny memory, something she’d heard from Retro. Holding tight to Jim’s waist, she leaned close and over the sound of the wind called out, “Where are we going, Einstein?”
His head turned enough she caught the gleam of his eyes from behind his shades. Mouth curved in a relaxed smile, he said, “Going home.”
A few minutes later, they were off the county highways and onto streets leading into a residential area. Marian sat up straighter, looking from side to side. In the rapidly falling darkness, she could make out only a few details of the houses, but they all looked occupied. Lived in, with piles of kids’ bikes in the front yards, swing sets in the back, and close clusters of chairs crowded around firepits. Their speed dropped to a crawl, and she turned to look at the house where they were stopping. There was a pristine yard, well-tended flowerbeds, and a tarp-covered vehicle under the carport. It stood in stark contrast to those lived-in homes on either side.
Unsure what they were doing, she didn’t dismount the bike while he parked it as she normally would have, clinging to him like a limpet instead. He didn’t remark on it, simply maneuvered the bike until it was positioned as he wanted, then killed the engine.
Marian’s heart pounded as he lifted a hand, and she placed hers against his palm, accepting the offer of assistance, which was as second nature as riding behind him had been. Her shoes scuffed swept concrete, and as she removed her helmet, she gazed around with more curiosity than before, certainty building inside her. He brought me to his home. She just didn’t know yet what it meant.
Einstein looked around much as she had. As he hung his helmet on the handlebar, his muttered, “God, my brothers,” didn’t make sense, because they were there alone. Marian decided it didn’t matter when he reached for her, fingers curling around her hip as he tugged her close.
He punched a set of buttons on a box near the door, the click of the latch loud as it released, and then he led her inside. They paused inside the door as low lights turned on automatically. He chuckled and shook his head, looking around like he had outside.
Toeing off his boots, he told her, “I haven’t been here in years. Last time I was in this room, it was a wreck. I’d trashed everything, furniture, cabinet doors—anything that could be broken was. Blind drunk and raging. Retro pulled me out of here, and I camped in the clubhouse for months.” She stumbled out of her shoes, pushing them against the wall as he had. His hand at her waist urged her to walk with him, so she did. Lights flashed into existence as they moved, and he led her through a door into a small sitting room, then via another door and down two steps into a much larger living area. “This is all new. A while back, maybe six months ago—I asked Mudd to get me a contractor who’d be willing to work with an absentee homeown
er. Took the old bedrooms out, extended the foundation, and made this. It’s not half bad.” He huffed a soft laugh. “Not too shabby. I like the furniture they picked.”
Everything was earth tones and neutrals, scattered rugs leaving plenty of slate floor exposed. The couch, love seat, and chair were leather, the furniture dark and heavy-looking, giving an air of masculinity to the room. The window treatments were brighter, colored in contrast to the rest of the room, and behind one set of blinds, she saw a window seat that just begged for a book, a blanket, and a rainy day.
“This is the first you’ve seen of the work?”
He was still looking around the room as he nodded. “Yeah. Oh, I saw pictures of course, but in the flesh? First time.” He tugged her sideways towards a door set in a far wall. “Let’s check out the rest of the work, baby.”
They walked into a short hallway with a single door at the end and stepped through into a huge bedroom. The bed was the largest she’d ever seen, but it fit the room well. To one side of the doorway was what looked to be a closet, and the other had a sliding door that opened into a bathroom. Low lighting had preceded them here, as well, and she could see as much of the detail as was needed to know it had a large tub, and a larger shower.
“Looks even better than the pictures.” His voice was filled with satisfaction, and she glanced up to find a pleased expression curling the corners of his mouth upwards. “They finished a few weeks ago. Just before all the shit went down in Baker.”
The Event.
Pulling her to face him, he bracketed her sides with his arms, fingers finding their way into her back pockets as he tugged her close. “See, I’d been fighting it for a while, how I feel about you. I’m a stupid asshole, trying to deny something so beautiful. Still, seems my subconscious knew I’d want to bring you back here and knew I needed to make changes to be okay with it. The bedroom I shared with Lauren is gone.” His head jerked towards the door leading back to the living area. “It’s not that I want to forget her. I don’t, and I trust you to understand what I mean when I say that. I’ll never forget her or my daughter. But…” His chest rose and fell with a heavy sigh. “I think it’s time to find my way back to the land of the living.”
Tangled Threats on the Nomad Highway Page 28