by Lisa Swift
‘Here you go,’ she said when she went back into the living room, presenting Daryl with a cup of tea. ‘White, no sugar.’
‘Thanks.’ He took a sip and let out a long sigh. ‘God, a proper English cuppa. Now this I missed.’
‘So where’s the new job based? London?’
He shook his head. ‘I negotiated for Manchester, so I could be nearer to Connor. Obviously I’m not planning to take him to live with me when he’s settled here, but I want to be within driving distance.’
‘You were threatening to move him out to Japan last month,’ Lexie observed drily.
‘All right, I shouldn’t have said that either. I’m sorry. I get angry, shoot my mouth off and say things I don’t mean, it’s my thing.’
She smiled. ‘You haven’t been gone so long I’ve forgotten that.’
‘Anyway, I was hoping we could set up some sort of access arrangement, with him coming to me every third weekend or something.’
‘You’ll need to do some groundwork first, Daz. The way he feels about you right now, I don’t think he’d go if you promised to take him on holiday to Betelgeuse Seven.’
‘That’s why I wanted to stay here. The flat needs furnishing but I could have bedded down there at a push. I wanted a week to lay a bit of groundwork, as you put it. Try to forge a bond.’
‘And you mean it? Because we’ve been here before, and if you hurt him this time I doubt he’ll ever forgive you. I certainly won’t.’
‘No, Lex, this time I mean it. I’ve had my Damascus moment.’ He put his tea down on the coffee table. ‘I wanted to say something to you too.’
‘What?’
‘Lexie, I know you always suspected I married you more for Connor’s sake than my own. That I wanted a mum for him more than I wanted a wife for myself.’
‘I never said that.’
‘No, but you thought it, didn’t you?’
‘It had crossed my mind,’ she admitted.
‘I wanted to tell you that wasn’t the case. I loved you very much.’
‘But not the way you loved Elise,’ she said, smiling sadly.
‘No. But I did love you, all the same.’ He sighed and picked up his tea again. ‘Well, I wasn’t a much better husband than I was a father, I guess.’
She shook her head. ‘You’re being uncharacteristically nice and cooperative. You’re not ill or anything, are you?’
‘No. Just… taking stock of what’s important to me.’
‘Why? I mean, why now?’
‘Well, it’s partly this therapy programme I’ve been on. Taro put me onto it and honestly, I feel it’s changing my life.’
‘What is it?’
‘It’s like the AA Twelve-Step Programme, only this isn’t for addicts. It’s for people affected by grief, especially arising from traumatic circumstances. People like me, who’ve let it shape their lives negatively. Part of the programme is about making amends to those you’ve hurt.’ He met her gaze. ‘But healing myself isn’t why I want to do it. I want to make things right with my son.’
Lexie blinked. ‘Well, that’s… a lot to take in. I’m glad you’re finally getting help.’
‘You always told me I ought to.’ He smiled. ‘If I wasn’t such a stubborn prick I might’ve listened, eh?’
She smiled back. ‘No arguments here.’
‘So how are you then, Lex? Still at the restaurant?’
‘Where else would I be?’ Lexie bristled, immediately on the defensive. She hated it when he seemed to sneer at the Parrot.
He laughed. ‘No need to bite my head off. I’m glad, OK? I admit I never thought that place was going to make it, but it sounds like you’ve made it a real success.’
‘It has its ups and downs but we’re always trying new things. Theo and me were instrumental in setting up this 1940s festival next week to pull in a bit of extra custom. If it goes well, we’re hoping it can become a regular thing.’
He looked impressed. ‘Good plan. You think of that?’
‘I had the idea, yes, but Theo fleshed it out. You know how he loves everything olden days.’
‘How is Theo?’
‘He still hates your guts.’
‘Mmm. I thought he probably would.’
‘But he does a great job of looking out for Connor and me,’ Lexie said, trying to fend off any hint of a blush. ‘He’s been a good friend, especially in the lean times.’
‘Well, there’ll be no more lean times. Like I said, the new job comes with a higher salary. I’ll make sure Connor’s provided for and you get your fair share in the divorce. I know you sacrificed your career for him and it’s only fair that’s taken into account.’
Lexie blinked. ‘Well, that’s… thanks, Daryl. And the house?’
‘We’ll sell it, of course. You’re right, we ought to get it on the market and sod waiting to squeeze every drop of value from it.’ He finished his tea. ‘So… anyone new on the scene for you?’
‘Er, no,’ she said, once again fighting against a blush. ‘I decided I wouldn’t date while Con was at home with me. He doesn’t need my boyfriends coming and going from his life.’
‘Right. Couldn’t agree more.’
‘What about you?’
‘No. No one for me.’
She frowned. ‘Daryl… you are just here for Connor, aren’t you?’
‘Of course.’
‘Only, me and you, that’s over. I want that divorce.’
‘It hadn’t even occurred to me.’ He stood up. ‘I’d better go make up one of the spare rooms. Then I’ll see if I can convince Connor to have a chat.’
‘You’d forgotten it was his birthday, hadn’t you?’
He bowed his head. ‘Yes. But I won’t forget again.’
* * *
Theo frowned when he arrived at Lexie’s place, freshly showered and with a packet of popcorn under his arm for their film night. Did she not realise the front door was hanging open? He knew she didn’t always lock it, but she really ought to make sure it was firmly closed. Anyone could wander in.
Not missing the irony, he wandered in without knocking and headed for the living room.
‘Well, here I am, guys, de-gimped and ready for curry,’ he called out. ‘I brought popcorn.’
He opened the door and stopped short when he saw who was in there.
‘You!’
Daryl frowned. ‘Theo?’
Theo tossed the bag of popcorn aside, grabbed his former business partner by the lapels and within seconds had him pinned up against the wall.
‘What the fuck do you think you’re doing here, you backstabbing son of a bitch?’ he thundered.
‘Christ, Theo! Get the hell off me!’ Daryl struggled to free himself, but Theo held him hard.
‘What are you doing here, Daryl?’
‘It’s my house, mate. I might ask you the same question.’
‘I’m entitled to be here. Or at least, I’m welcome here, which is more than I can say for you.’
‘You just walk in whenever you want now, do you?’
Theo stared into the eyes of the man he’d once believed he could trust with his life and gave him a shove.
‘I was invited,’ he growled. ‘By my godson. Remember him? You and Elise once trusted me to take care of him in your place if it was ever necessary, just like I once trusted you to have my back. At least one of us kept up their end of the bargain, eh, old friend?’
Connor had appeared at the living room door and was watching as his godfather held his dad by the throat.
‘Theo?’ he said. ‘What’s going on?’
‘For Christ’s sake,’ Lexie said. ‘Look, there’s a kid in the room. Can you two grown men put your dicks away and stop covering the walls in testosterone? Theo, let Daryl go.’
She went to put her arm around Connor. Theo glanced at them, and his scowl lifted. He released Daryl from his grip and stepped back.
‘Sorry, kiddo,’ he said to Connor. ‘That was wrong. I was angry, but I should
never… you shouldn’t have to see that. I didn’t mean to spoil your birthday.’
‘You didn’t spoil it.’ Connor glared at his father. ‘He did. What did you have to come back for, Dad? You’ve ruined everything.’
He turned and stomped back upstairs.
‘What the hell did you think you were doing, Theo?’ Daryl demanded, straightening his collar. ‘No wonder the boy gets in trouble for fighting if this is the example you’ve been setting.’
Theo shook his head. ‘Oh, no. You don’t get to take the moral high ground. You cost me my business, you son of a bitch.’
‘I didn’t have any choice,’ Daryl muttered. ‘Anyway, it wasn’t your business. Elise’s granddad left it to me and her.’
‘No, it was our business. I bought Elise’s half from you fair and square. I put everything I had into Bistrot Alexandre, Daryl, because I trusted you when you told me we could make a success of it. Don’t go acting like it was your fucking birthright, just because Elise’s grandad was the one who trained you up in the biz.’
‘I told you, I didn’t have a—’
‘And don’t give me that bullshit about not having a choice either,’ Theo snapped. ‘You had a choice between discussing the state of the finances with me or stabbing me in the back so you could cut your losses and run, and you chose the latter.’
Daryl met his eye defiantly. ‘I had to. We couldn’t have saved the place. If you’d insisted on struggling on with it, like I just bloody know you would’ve, we’d both have lost everything.’
‘I did lose everything, Daryl! Everything I’d invested, all those years of hard work, gone because you decided to write the place off without consulting me.’
‘You didn’t lose everything. You came away with a big enough sum to set you up with something else.’
Theo snorted. ‘So you did me a favour then, did you? Well, cheers, pal.’
‘I did what I had to,’ Daryl said in a low voice. ‘For my family. It wasn’t about you, it never was.’
‘That’d be the family you walked out on, right?’
‘If I hadn’t sold up and taken the job in Japan, I could’ve wound up bankrupt within the year. This way, I was able to support my son even if I couldn’t be around for him.’
‘And the sacrifice you were willing to make was your best friend.’
‘For Connor, then… well, yes.’ Daryl cast his eyes down, looking ashamed now. ‘I’m sorry, Theo. It was my responsibility, as a father.’
Theo scoffed. ‘A responsibility you’ve always taken very seriously, of course.’
‘From a financial point of view, yes. You think I wanted to see the boy left with nothing? If you had kids of your own you might understand.’
‘I might not have kids, Daryl, but I do have people who depend on me. Do you know how hard it was after you turned your back on me like that?’
Daryl frowned. ‘Do you have people?’
‘Yes!’ Theo shook his head, laughing. ‘Mate, we’ve known each other since we were fucking thirteen. The fact you still know so little about me is probably our entire friendship in a nutshell.’
‘You ought to have told me.’
‘And you ought to have talked to me, regardless of that.’ Theo turned to Lexie. ‘Look, I’m sorry for making a scene, Lex. I ought to go.’
He made to leave, but Daryl put a hand on his arm.
‘Theo, wait. Why don’t we talk about this like adults, eh? You were my best friend for nearly twenty years. You were best man at my wedding, for Christ’s sake – at both of them.’
‘That’s right, I was. You know, Daryl, the best thing you ever did for me was to let me get to know your second wife.’
Daryl frowned. ‘What’s that supposed to mean?’
Theo could see Lexie from the corner of his eye, almost imperceptibly shaking her head.
‘I mean, Lex was a better friend and business partner than you ever were,’ he said. ‘You never did realise how lucky you were to have Lexie and Connor.’
‘I know,’ Daryl said in a low voice. ‘But I’ve come home to change that. I want to make amends. To them, and to you if you’ll let me.’
Theo shook his head. ‘Jesus. You’re not telling me you’re back for good?’
‘Yeah, I’ve been transferred. I’m here for a week then I’m moving into a flat in Manchester.’
‘Here! You’re staying at the house?’ He looked at Lexie. ‘You’re not having that, are you?’
‘It’s his house, Theo,’ she said. ‘He wants to spend some time with Connor before he moves to Manchester. I can’t really say no, can I?’
‘And what does Connor want? Not that, I bet.’
‘He’ll come round,’ Daryl said. ‘I am his father, after all – the only one he’s got, for all my sins.’
Theo fixed him with a look of intense dislike. ‘That’s how it is, is it? You push him away for years, then you think you can just pick him up like a fucking unfinished crossword when your conscience starts to prick? Is this about Connor or you?’
‘Both, I hope.’
‘I’d better go, before I say something we’ll all regret,’ Theo muttered. ‘Lex, I’ll see you tomorrow at work. Daryl, if you hurt Con by messing about with his feelings – if you hurt either of them – then believe me, I’ll do more than just pin you to the wall.’
He marched out, slamming the door behind him.
‘Well,’ Lexie said. ‘Nothing like a bit of drama to say welcome home, eh?’
Chapter Twenty-Seven
The next day was the penultimate Monday of the six-week holidays, and Connor was scheduled to go on a youth club coach trip to Lightwater Valley. Lexie tiptoed past the spare bedroom Daryl was staying in to knock on her stepson’s door. It had been like this all last night: creeping about, trying to avoid what felt, now, like a stranger in their home. Connor had shut himself up in his room, refusing to come down even to eat, and after pointing Daryl to the ready meals in the freezer, Lexie had gone to hide likewise.
‘Time to get ready for your trip, my love,’ she said in a low voice through Connor’s door. ‘Come get some breakfast when you’re dressed.’
‘Is Dad awake?’
‘Not yet.’
He opened the door to peep out at her. ‘I don’t want to see him.’
She sighed. ‘I know, Con, but you’ll have to see him sometimes. He’s your father.’
‘He might as well not be, for everything he knows about me.’
‘Come on down and I’ll make you a fry-up. Post-birthday treat to make up for last night, eh?’
Twenty minutes later Connor joined Lexie in the kitchen, where she was frying sausages, and flung himself into a chair. Lexie leaned over, spatula in hand, to kiss the top of his head.
‘Does Dad have to stay a whole week?’ he muttered.
‘It’s half his house, Con. We can’t very well tell him to sling his hook.’
‘That means Theo can’t come over. Me and him were going to make the model AT-AT he bought me at CalderCon.’
‘Well, I’m sure that’ll keep.’ She put a plate of food in front of him and took a seat opposite. ‘How are you feeling, sweetie?’
‘Pissed off.’
She smiled. ‘I guess that’s a given. But come on, isn’t there a little part of you that wants to hear what your dad has to say?’
‘No. He’s had plenty of time to say things to me. If he didn’t give a shit about me before, why should I believe he’s changed now? He didn’t even remember it was my birthday.’
‘Oh, I’m sure he did.’
‘He didn’t. He couldn’t remember how old I was.’ He glanced up from demolishing his sausage, egg and beans. ‘You got me that stuff you said was from him. Didn’t you?’
‘Well… yes, me and Theo did choose it,’ she admitted. ‘Your dad sent the money though.’
Connor snorted. ‘Oh yeah, money. He’ll send that if it means he doesn’t have to actually think about me, right?’
Lexi
e reached over to squeeze his hand. ‘Con, sweetheart, I know your dad hasn’t always been there for you—’
‘Never. He’s never been there for me.’
‘Well, I suppose it might feel like that,’ she conceded. ‘But he loves you. I genuinely believe that. And it feels like this time, he really does want to try to build a better relationship with you.’
‘He’s said that before. Theo’s more like a dad to me than he is.’
‘Did Theo ever tell you about his dad?’ Lexie asked softly.
‘Yeah. He said he walked out on him when he was a baby and he hated his guts for it.’
‘That’s right. It affected him, the fact they never had a relationship. When he and I were first…’ She glanced at the door. ‘…first closer friends than we had been, I found out he had a lot of issues to work through because of it, especially when his dad died without any sort of closure for him. Whether or not you and your dad are able to build a better relationship, I think it would be healthy for you to talk to him.’
‘He doesn’t deserve it,’ Connor muttered.
‘But you do,’ she said gently, pressing his hand. ‘I know you’re angry, but think about it, OK? For me.’
His scowl lifted a little. ‘Yeah, all right. Only because you want me to.’
The door opened and Daryl appeared, smiling awkwardly.
‘That smells good, Lex,’ he said. ‘Any going spare for a houseguest?’
‘Help yourself,’ Lexie said, gesturing to the cooker as she stood up. ‘The beans’ll need heating up. Sorry to leave you to it, Daz, but I have to get to the restaurant.’
Connor pushed his plate away. ‘I need to get the bus to youth club.’
‘You don’t need to rush off, do you, son?’ Daryl asked, resting a hand on his shoulder. ‘I could always drive you, if your stepmum can spare me the car. I’m still insured.’
‘It’s fine. I like the bus.’ Not making eye contact, Connor shrugged off his hand and marched out.
* * *
Lexie had deliberately left home early, long before she normally arrived at the restaurant. She didn’t want to be hanging around the house while Daryl was there, and besides, she wanted to talk to Theo. When she arrived at the Blue Parrot, she let herself in and went to knock on the door of his flat.