We harmonize through I’m So Excited.
We’re skinning tomatoes, chopping them, putting it all in a bowl to start canning. We have bright yellow Lemon Boys, Bolivian Rainbows, and traditional reds. Some are huge, others moderate, all will be diced, lemon added, and then canned. “Hey Simon, you wanna cut figs in half to put in the dryer?”
“Sure, I can do that.”
“Mom?” I hear Alex’s voice from the other room. “Jonathan, help me the fuck up man!”
I peak around the corner. Jonathan is helping Alex to the table. “Watch out, dude, I might drop you on your butt!”
“Yeah, and I might trip you on my way down,” Alex retorts.
“How’s your head, Alex?”
“Nothing quite like drugs to spruce a guy up! What do we have to eat?”
“I saved you a plate of spaghetti. You want parmesan, right?” I put some on the woodstove to heat, then get the parmesan out. He was looking pretty woozy when Jonathan brought him to the table. I’m thankful he can get up. I chop tomatoes glancing at the clock. It’s only been a couple hours. It’s bothering me that they could come back with someone else injured and my stomach twists.
I get Alex’ food, “Here, cutie.”
“Thanks, Mom, how about chili pepper?” Alex asks, always wanting his food spicy. I get him the cayenne. The tomato proceedings continue. “Anyone want me to save some fresh figs?” Simon checks in.
“Thanks for asking, but no, they’re not very sweet this time of year,” I explain.
“I can help,” Jonathan volunteers.
“Could you guys look through the buckets? I want to get through the stuff with the largest quantities first. Smaller amounts we may be able to use fresh for dinner.”
“There’re more tomatillos. What should we do with it?”
“Oh, a lot?” I ask.
“A quart?” He guesses.
“Okay. Maybe we can make tomatillo soup.” We continue working on the tomatoes.
“Shit, Mom, we stopped at my dad’s house on the way home, didn’t we?” Alex asks.
I realize he doesn’t remember. “We did.” I walk over to him, sitting beside him, and putting my arm around him. “He was dead, sweetie. I’m so sorry.” He lays his head on my shoulder.
“I can’t believe he’s gone. It’s like Rasheen all over again.” He sniffs, crying quietly. I hold him, rub his back, and feel my own memories cause an ache in my chest. I won’t cry now, upstaging my son’s pain. We sit like that for a while as he grieves.
After a while, I say, “I’m going to give you some paper, a pen, and you can draw or write. Get some of that grief out another way.” I get up and get the art supplies.
I walk down the stairs to check on Jose. “Where’s your pain level?”
“¿Que paso con mi pierna?” What happened to my leg?
“Ellos dijeron que una bala rozo tu pierna.” They said a bullet grazed your leg.
“¡Dios mio! Es verdad!” My God, that’s right!
“Since you’re awake, we should check the wound. Jonathan!”
“Yeah, Mom.” Jonathan comes. “Hola, Papá. I’m going to change the bandage.”
“I’ll go get the bandages and the comfrey. I think they’re by the other couch.” I head into the front room and gather up the medical supplies. “Hey, Alex, how are you feeling, babe?” I rub his back a little. He’s sitting at the table, drawing.
“Like shit. But I’m alive and my brain is still functioning so I’m not complaining. I can’t believe my dad is gone.” There’s a long pause. “When you’re done with Jose, could you bring me something to do to help you guys? I’m screwed in the walking department and could use the distraction.”
“Sure, babe, give me a minute.” I carry the supplies back to Jonathan. “You got this covered?”
“Yep. Thanks.”
“Jose, can you tolerate your pain?” I figure the pain meds are wearing off.
“Duele por seguro.” It hurts for sure. “Pero no quiero mas, gracias.” But, I don’t want more, thanks. I feel a surge of respect. He always tries to avoid medication. He impacted me in that area. I’ve grown wary of western medicine. “Do you want me to bring you something to do? I’m going to take something to Alex. He can’t get around right now.”
“Si, muñeca, quiero ayudar.” Yes, Doll, I want to help. I peruse the work that still needs doing. I fill a bucket with skinned tomatoes, grab a cutting board, a knife, and take it to Alex, then do the same for Jose. Jose will make short work of this. He’s always been fast and efficient. I feel a light, rushing feeling, thinking of him. “Here, we’ll keep you busy!” I tease each of them. Jonathan is in the kitchen when I return, the ladies chattering about their friends.
“It’s so weird, all this. I wonder if we’ll see our friends again?” Gracie wonders.
“I wonder if I’ll see my family again, or if they’re all dead?” Morgan muses, sadly. “It’s so overwhelming. I’m grateful your family took me in. I’d probably be dead on my own.” Her eyes tear.
“We’re glad you’re here,” Dixie pipes in. “We needed more feminine energy!” She’s like her mom, always teasing.
“Alright ladies, wow! Look at all your progress. This is a huge bowl of tomatoes. And that’s a big bucket of tomatoes still to do!” I grab a knife and a station. “Morgan, you must feel a lot of pain, losing your parents so young. Please, feel free to take space to grieve. There are lots of ways, crying is just one option. You can draw it out, write about it, sing or dance, weed, meditate, or do yoga. You can even put it into cooking. Just put your intention out that you’re putting your grief into the activity. Find your own way.” I hug her, petting her hair.
Dixie is manning the boiling water, passing tomatoes out. “Don’t worry. I’ll keep you in tomatoes!” She waggles her eyebrows at me.
“Alright, who’s on music duty?” I ask.
“It’s new music time!” Maddie heads into the living room to change the music. “Woman, you’ve got good music in here! Let’s go back to the queens of soul! A little Billie Holiday, a little Ella…”
“That’s it! Now you’re talking’”
“¡Mas tomates, por favor!” Jose calls. He’s so fast, already wanting more. We’re dancing and dicing after taking a new bucket to Jose. Morgan makes eye contact, leaving the room. I know she’s taking space to grieve.
“Hey, bring on the tomatoes!” Alex calls, teasingly.
Time passes a little faster with everyone chopping tomatoes, everyone awake, and everyone getting better.
Seventeen
Eliana
Worry Time
“Thank God that’s the last batch of tomatoes. It’s time to start cooking dinner. Did someone defrost meat?” I’m ready to switch projects, but I’d rather sit down and rest. I’m tired, a little overwhelmed with work and the other group not back yet. Where could they be? It’s almost dinner time.
“I got you covered,” Dixie says, pulling chicken out of the refrigerator. “This is almost the last of the chicken. There’s barely enough for one more meal.”
“I wonder if it would be safe to take a trip out to Polyrock to get meat?” I ponder. “It would be nice if we could take something to trade, but maybe they’d be glad just to have helping hands if they’re still alive…”
“So, what’s the plan for this?” Dixie asks, food focused.
“Let’s do it easy. I’m tired. We can get a pot of rice cooking. Ladies, could you do salad while we start rice and chicken? I’m thinking just sprinkle with herbs and bake it. Simon, Jonathan, you guys are on table and dish duty okay?” With bodies in motion, it begins coming together.
“We’re running out of fresh vegetables too,” Gracie points out.
“Is there enough for tonight?” I ask.
“Maybe.” She sounds unsure.
“Okay. Gracie you and Dixie can take over. You know how to do this chicken don’t you? I can get kale from the garden.”
Quiet descends at the t
able with mouths full.
“They should have been back by now, don’t you think?” I ask, chest tight with worry.
“Definitely,” Jonathan agrees, “something’s off.”
“Let’s get the Cards Against Humanity out,” Alex suggests, “otherwise you’re all going to drive me fuckin’ crazy with your worrying!” There’s more tease than insult.
We work together to clean up, then gather in the living room. I find myself watching for headlights as darkness sets in.
“Okay, when all else fails, I can always masturbate to…” Alex reads the black card, “hand ‘em over guys.”
“I ain’t got shit,” Jonathan complains.
“I’ve got good ones, here.” I pass over a card, looking out the window, and notice my chest aching.
Alex makes a buzzer noise, dumping the dud card. “Ah, I can always masturbate to… 72 virgins.” Titters. “Oh, better. I can always masturbate to.. puberty!”
When the game is over, I’m dragging myself to bed, aching with concern for my friends.
“What do you think happened to them, Mom?” Gracie asks as we head to bed.
I stop to hug Eli.
“They probably raided the liquor store on the way home and decided to get drunk somewhere!” Eli laughs and heads to his room.
Gracie and I crawl into bed. “I’m sure they’re holed up somewhere, avoiding crazies. They’re tough, they’re fine.” I sound more convincing than I feel. She snuggles against me.
I lay there for a long time, entertaining the ‘what if theater’. What if they’re injured or trapped somewhere. Where could they be? What if they didn’t make it to the hospital? How long will it take for us to know?
In my mind a group of crazies accosts their vehicle, destroying it and killing my friends. I can see them trapped in the vehicle with a swarm of crazies beating in the windows, hitting them in the head with bricks. I force myself to imagine beautiful places I have been in my life to displace the horrible thoughts, imagining myself hiking around Salt Creek Falls, admiring the beautiful paths and the carved rock around the falls.
Eighteen
Eliana
Family Reunion
I must have fallen asleep, because I wake up in an empty bed, awareness of a nightmare still fuzzy in my brain. I follow my morning routine of meditation, yoga, affirmations, and expressing gratefuls.
In the dining room, I find many at the table, the sky just beginning to lighten. I guess no one slept well. My body feels heavy, exhausted with worry. I can’t help glancing outside, wishing to see their pickup. “Good morning. No sign of them, huh?”
“No,” they chorus.
“You want tea?” Maddie asks.
“Thanks, definitely.” I head to the butcher block where it is already steeping.
“We’ve eaten. Here.” Maddie hands me a plate.
I serve some scrambled eggs. There’s not much left, but there’s a pile of fried potatoes with ham.
I sit at the table, asking, “what do you think happened?”
“They must be trapped somewhere,” Simon answers. “Eh, they’re fine. They’re badass.”
“That’s true.” I begin eating, reminding myself, repeatedly, that they’re okay.
After breakfast it’s back to work. Jose insists he’s okay and hobbles outside with Simon and Eli, while the rest of us continue canning. I’ve never been able to stand letting food spoil, having spent summers and falls canning just to conserve the bounty. If this all blows over soon, we’ll have more than we need but it will just mean less shopping.
Just then Sheba races to the front door.
“Maybe we can get some help. It looks like our crew is back.” Dixie sounds chipper.
I run to the front window, see their pickup pull in, with a king cab behind it. “Who is that behind them. There are goats!” I see Rob and an unfamiliar woman step out of the pickup with Jedaiah, while Sam gets out of the other truck. They’re talking to each other, so I step outside, running to Jedaiah. I swoop him into my arms. “Hi, punkin, I missed you!” He looks so skinny. I wonder if his parents have been sick. I lean in to Sam. “Who’s that?” I whisper in her ear, hugging her with my free arm.
“Eliana, this is Jessie. We found her at the hospital. She’s joining our community and sharing her abundance with us.” Then she leans in close and whispers, “Jenny’s dead and Nick is sick.”
“Welcome Jessie. We’re glad to have you!” I welcome her, trying to process the whispered information, nuzzling Jedaiah’s cheek. She’s leaning on Sam, yet reaches out.
I hug her, “welcome. You’re hurt.”
“Thanks, Eliana. Yeah. I got hit by some crazies. I really appreciate your welcome. I have a house and land, but no family here.” She touches Jedaiah’s other cheek. “You sure are a cutie. Do you like bunnies?”
Jedaiah nods vigorously.
“You’re welcome to pet my bunnies,” she says, smiling at him.
“Eliana, Faith also got injured. We picked up Nick, but he’s very sick,” Rob reports.
I follow Rob to the back of the pickup. He tosses Nick over his shoulder. I’m astounded by how full the pickup is.
Just then Nadir pulls up. What a relief. I was concerned about what was taking so long. He must have needed some time alone to greive.
“We practically emptied Mazama, then the hospital, then took most of the food and medicine from Nick’s house,” Rob explains. “The other truck also has food and animals from Jessie’s, which isn’t far if we want to go back for more.” He looks over my shoulder. “Someone is going to have to carry Faith in. She got stabbed.”
I realize Jonathan is behind me. “I’ll get her.” He steps around me, scooping Faith up. I grab a bag of food, heading for the house. Jessie gimps by Sam who carries a basket of vegetables apparently from Jessie’s garden.
“I wish I could help, “ Jessie apologizes. “We’ll probably have to tie the goats up to keep them away from your vegetables until we create a pen, but I wanted to bring them so we can milk the female.” She turns to Jedaiah. “Do you like goats?”
He nods, laying his head on my shoulder.
“Well, these goats are really friendly so you can visit with them when we unload them, okay?” Jessie rubs his arm gently.
“Jedaiah, let’s get your coat off.” I set him down to put his coat in the closet. “That’s wonderful. You have a female and a male?”
“Yeah, they’re great, friendly too.” Her voice softens with affection.
“Wow. That’s great.” I plop Jedaiah on the butcher block. “Maybe they’ll have a baby and it will be a female also.”
“Either way it’s good,” Jessie reassures me. “If it’s a male, we can eat it. I brought the chickens so you’ll have more eggs. The bunnies make good poop for the garden and create more bunnies we can eat.”
I can hardly absorb all this. Just when we were starting to run out, we have three more members of our clan and much more food. “Hey look everyone, this is Jessie. And this cutie pie is Jedaiah.” There are a chorus of introductions while Gracie comes, plucking Jedaiah off the butcher block.
“Are you hungry?” She asks him. “You look skinnier than usual.”
“I eated cheese. Can I have a fruit?” He asks, pointing at our fruit baskets attached to a cupboard at the edge of the kitchen.
Gracie walks over to the basket. “An orange?” She knows his favorite. He grabs the orange which Gracie will help peel.
“He’s a doll,” Dixie says, next to her. “I’m Dixie, Gracie’s friend.” Morgan is admiring him from a distance.
“Wow, now we’ll have enough salad for a couple more nights!” Gracie is excited. “Wow, Mom, there’re a bunch more vegetables!” My energy resurges with the return of our friends, the promise of meat and milk, and the excitement of more vegetables.
“You guys must be hungry. Sit and eat!” I admonish. Sam helps Jessie to the table while I serve Jedaiah. Gracie puts the ketchup in front of him. Jedaiah looks gl
eeful, digging right in. The returned group gathers at the table to eat. “Thank God we’re back.” Rob moans. “I am so hungry. Last night we shared Cup-a-Soups at your office and some nuts. All we’ve had this morning were a few nuts.”
Jedaiah squirms out of Gracie’s arms with his peeled orange as the calico cat walks in. He follows her, petting her as she walks slowly, swishing her tail.
“I can help someone with the animals,” Jessie offers.
I head to where Jonathan has laid Faith on the couch. “Jonathan, do you need more medicine? Jessie would love some help with the animals she has in the truck.” Then I turn to Alex. “Are you going to be okay upright?”
“As long as you’ve got CBD oil, I’ll be juuust fine!” He laughs.
“Sure, Jessie, I’ll help.” Jonathan stands. “Just give me a minute. You’ve seen the crazies out there? We’ve been keeping that side of me under wraps. It popped out once and we’re not going to let it pop out again!” He jokes, making me feel warm with pride.
“So, what are you taking for that?” She asks.
“Right now, Seroquel,” he explains, “but if we run out of that, I’ll take whatever I can so I can continue to help. You look really familiar. Did you work at the hospital?”
“Yeah, I’m a nurse.” Jessie cocks her head, one hand on her hip. “You look familiar too. What was your role?” She asks.
“I’m a medical intern.” He looks down sheepishly, as if he feels bad he didn’t finish his internship before the outbreak.
I watch them head outside. “We put Nick in your mom’s old bedroom for now,” Rob tells me as he heads outside with Sam and Nadir, presumably to begin unloading the pickup. I exit with Katie, followed by Jedaiah.
“Jedaiah, you’ll need a mask and scrubs.” I grab a set for myself, putting only a shirt on him with the sleeves rolled up.
Arriving at the bedroom, I Look at Nick’s still form on the bed as Katie checks his temperature. It’s high, 103.8. Jedaiah crawls up on the bed and holds his hand. I sit next to him, following the routine we had with Jonathan. I spoon feed him elderberry syrup, alternating with cold fighter tea. “You want to help?” I ask Jedaiah.
Considerable Destruction Series (Book 1): Evasion ( Page 16