B.A.D

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B.A.D Page 2

by Caitlin Moran


  "Okay!" I yell to get him to shut the hell up. I loved Layla like a sister and I definitely didn't want to hear about this from the guy she did it with. I would probably hear the details from her anyway but getting it from the guy was... weird.

  I almost think back to see if I remember what happened to myself last night. Note the word "almost". I don't want to think about those things while with someone. I might cry from the fact I wasn't a virgin or do something equally embarrassing.

  We pull into my driveway and I almost jump out but remember to give him the number.

  I run up to my door as I hear his car leave. Opening the door, I remember my mom. My eyes widen and I bolt for the stairs.

  "ELLIE!" I hear a voice yell to me just before I am attacked and flung to the ground. I groan with a seven year old sitting on me. He may be seven, but damn was he heavy.

  "Hey Shane. Now can you please get off of me?" His little head bobs, dirty blond hair swinging across his forehead. He jumps to his feet, holding a tiny hand out for me. I smile and take it yet scream when his hand comes in contact with mine.

  I jerk my hand back and grimace in disgust at the sticky blue paint that was now my hand. He holds his hand up to reveal a broken little packet that used to be full of the blue substance. His blue-ish grey eyes twinkle in amusement. He grins mischievously and winks.

  Oh it's on, buddy! I yell in my head before reaching my blue stained hand to him. His eyes widen and he runs. I run after him.

  Now we're on a full out mission to get each other. I'm running with the blue junk on my hand, Shane running not wanting to get stuff on himself while screeching like a banshee.

  "MOMMA!" He screams and flings himself into the woman that is now standing in the doorway. I freeze and look at her. Her blond hair is disheveled in a bun on the top of her head and her brown eyes are dull. She has looked like this for a while. Layla doesn't like my mom that much; she says she creeps her out.

  "Elaina?" Her face shows confusion and anger. "Where have you been... and what the HELL ARE YOU WEARING!?!" She's basically screaming at the end and Shane runs up the stairs, scared.

  My face hardens. "Not like it matters to you." My mother and have been on the outs for a couple of days. I had started to notice small changes with her and when I asked about it, she dismissed it with a wave of her hand. She would grow distant sometimes and be off somewhere in her head, she got angry easier, and when she would smack Shane on the hand, it would be harder than usual. It scared me.

  I just turned around and went up to my room. I didn't want to start a screaming war with her today; I had enough on my plate.

  "Don't you walk away from me?" She yelled while following after me. I ran into my room and locked the door. She pounded on it for a little while before giving a short scream and a huff. Something was definitely wrong with her. I heard the door slam and then decided to check on Shane.

  Unlocking my door, I crept to his room. I pushed open his door to see him in his corner, crying. I sighed.

  "Come on, Shane. Lets get you ready for a nap." I lifted him into my arms. After helping start his bath, feeding him, and doing all those things, I tucked him in. "Get some rest," I whispered with a kiss on his forehead. I stayed to watch him fall asleep then went to my own room.

  I went to my closet and pulled a floorboard up. I picked up the picture and lightly traced the plain brown frame. My head hit the back of the closet as I sit there, looking at the beautiful girl next to me in the picture.

  Madella... You're supposed to be here. Helping me...

  Sighing, I close my eyes and thought of the last day I saw her.

  Chapter 4: Elaina's POV

  The picture sat in my hands, light in weight. A lone tear ran down my face. Madella was my older sister. She was older by two years.

  I look at her laughing gray-blue eyes in the picture. Her eyes remind me of Shane's, they must get their eye color from our father's side. We sit side by side, me seven and her nine. I remember the day...

  "Girls, girls!" I hear the deep baritone voice of our babysitter say. Our babysitter was the nicest person in the world- at least to all of the kids she babysat. She always gave cookies to us right before we went home. She told us it was a secret that she gave us cookies; she didn't want the parents to find out how all of their kids were so hyped up.

  Today she only babysits my sister and I. Mother was at the hospital giving birth to her last child. I don't know who the father was but when I first saw the baby, with the same gray-blue eyes as Madella, I knew it was the same man who had gave momma Madella and I. We stay with Mrs. Springs, our babysitter, for the next three days as Mother is in the hospital.

  I see her gray hair sway softly against her back as she approaches us. We look at her to see her with a camera and a plate of cookies.

  "Stay right there! I will bring the goodies to you," she finally makes it to us as she says these things. Setting the plate on the dock, she snaps a picture of us with her camera. I can see it now, the water lapping at our feet, the trees of in the distance, and the ducks in the background who glide over the water with their soft feather covered tummies.

  The picture was a reminder of a great memory. My sister’s dark brown hair is in a braid down her back while mine is stuck up in pigtails. Our eyes dance in amusement and we smile real big, having just sung a song about ponies and macaroni on heads. Mrs. Springs gave us cookies and we had a great time with her that week.

  When Madella was 14 and I was 12, she started to date this boy. His name was Jason. They had been dating for about a year when they both disappeared.

  They didn't quite disappear to me. I mean, I saw them leave. So, to me, they didn't disappear, they left.

  It was a Tuesday night, school was tomorrow. I awoke to an engine starting. The noise was light, almost not loud enough for me to hear. We live in a little white picket fence neighborhood so it's not uncommon to hear cars start but what made me get out of bed was the slight creak of my sister's door opening from across the hall.

  I jump up from my bed and zoom to my door, wide awake. It was the middle of the night and it was pitch black throughout the house. Being on the second floor, I creep over to the stairs.

  Madella was just leaving out the front door. I run to it, but it closes in my face. In my haste, I slam into it and can't seem to get it open. Just as I open it, I see Jason push Madella into the passenger side and jump into the driver's seat.

  They take off down the road, with me running after them. I yell Madella's name but they turn the corner and are gone. I go back into the house and sit next to the door, crying.

  In the morning, everyone thinks she ran off. I knew better and I told everyone over and over what I saw yet they still believe their own theory. My mother doesn't say anything, just has an angered expression.

  Bringing myself back to the present, I look back at the hole in my floor. A tattered and old letter sticks up from it and I read the note Madella left me.

  Dear Elaina,

  My dearest sister, I have left, of my own desire I assure you. I just couldn't stand living there anymore, with Mother. I couldn't stand all of the lies, the deceit. If only you knew, you would feel the same. I believe I knew too much in that house, about that house. I wouldn't have been there long if I had stayed anyway... I love you, Elaina. Watch out for Shane and watch out for yourself. Watch out for who you trust. Layla is a good person and I trust her to help you with the times to come. Be careful...

  Love,

  Madella

  I don't know how long I sit there, in the corner with the drying tears and old letter but when I stuff the picture and note back in the hole and come back out, it's dark outside.

  I get out of the dress I realize I'm still wearing and I shower. A light knock on my door has me going to it. Shane stands in his little batman pajamas. His stuffed bear, old and worn down from the use, hangs from his arm- I think he named it Mr. Bears.

  "Can I sleep with you? Momma is scaring me again," his voice is so
ft and cracks a little. I nod and allow him into my room. He runs and jumps into the bed, snuggling into the soft sheets. He's plopped right in the middle of the bed, but I don't say anything. I just hop in next to him and I feel him curl up against my side. He's warm. I've always noticed that about him, how warm against my side he is. I shrug it off as another mystery in this world.

  I think about what he said. About how 'Momma is scaring him'. I know what he is talking about, I've seen it. It's where are mom curls up into a fetal position and sits in the corner of her room. All the curtains are drawn and there is absolutely no light. A blanket covers her whole body and she shakes. Her whole body twitches and sometimes she yells out in pain. It creeps the hell out of me.

  I think back onto the note "I couldn't stand all of the lies, the deceit." I decide that I will find out about all of these lies. These so called "lies" that chased away my sister, the ones where she left all Shane and I with our crazy mother...

  Chapter 5: Elaina's POV

  The rest of the weekend and part of the school week passed by uneventfully. It was a Friday afternoon and I was in my last period in school, English. I had been avoiding Rane all week. I would run from the classroom as soon as the bell rang if I had that class with him. I could tell he was trying to talk to me but I just didn't want to think about it.

  I was watching the clock, trying to force the hands on the clock to go faster. It wasn't working. I felt like crap this morning and sometimes had a little pain in my abdomen. The last few days I had been getting a little sick in the mornings but I shrugged it off. My 'time of the month' had a weird schedule. It pretty much came whenever. I once went three months without it and one time had it for a whole month-it was pure hell. My mom made me go to school every single day of it too.

  I tuned back into the conversation with the teacher and the "class clown", Jack. He was a real tool if you ask me.

  "Jake, I don't think you could use the word 'harassment' in a sentence," Mrs. What’s-her-name told the boy who was laid back in his seat. The woman was wearing all purple and blue, making me think of peacocks for whatever reason. Her gray hair was up in a bun with- what I believe- was a feather. Definitely a peacock. I hadn't been paying attention in class and had no idea what they were talking about.

  "Sure I can!" Jack had a mischievous glint to his eye and I wondered what he was up to. I hoped Mrs. Peacock Lady wouldn't take his verbal bait. I could see the wheels turning in his head at what would be his answer.

  "Well, prove it. Use the word 'harassment' in a sentence and I won't give you detention," her dark blue skirt swished around her ankles as she walked to him.

  "Okay," he pondered over what he was going to say. "I once loved a girl..." he trailed off while looking around the room, making sure everyone was listening, "And Her-Ass-Meant a lot to me!" He finished while busting out laughing.

  It took us a moment before we all understood, then we all laughed. I even did so myself. Just as a very angry looking peacock lady was about to yell at the blond haired jokester, the bell rang.

  "Saved by the bell," He was telling his friends as he rushed out the door.

  I walked out too, a little slower. I may have wanted to get out of class as soon as possible but now that I knew school was over, it didn't matter as much. I went to my locker and got everything I needed out and stuck it in my messenger bag. Layla was at some type of practice today and I had to walk home.

  I was walking down the now empty hallway when an arm came out of nowhere and pulled me into a room. I screamed but a hand came down onto my mouth, somehow the scent of the hand or the warmth calmed me down.

  I was pulled into the dark room and a light flipped on when I was pushed up against a wall. When I looked closer, I saw that we were in a janitor's closet.

  The hand came off and I realized it was... Rane? My confused face looked up at him. I could feel my eyebrows scrunch together. A small frown marred my face. He backed away a step and bumped into the opposite wall.

  I just noticed our close proximity, my body heating up where his long legs brushed against mine. I looked at his attire and my mouth watered. His dark shirt clung to his body, soaking wet. This confused me even more.

  Why was he wet? I tried not to look down at his legs, yet I did. I nearly groaned at the sight of them, my heart skipping a beat. The wet material clung onto his toned legs.

  I heard a light chuckle and I jerked my head back up, having been caught checking him out and I blushed. I couldn't deny it-he was hot.

  "Umm... Di-did you ne-need me?" I stuttered, barely getting the words out of my mouth. He looked at me, his hand running through his hair showing off his muscles with the movement.

  "I-I just wanted... to.. see you?" His statement really came out sounding like a question. I cocked my head to the side in confusion, my throat showing. He groaned and it was the sexiest sound I have ever heard. His eyes darkened in lust and he took a half step forward. My heart pounded, fast and erratically.

  His eyes were nearly black now, I licked my lips and his gaze went immediately to them. His head was just over mine, my head was tilted back to look up at him. His arms came up to trap me to the wall. I felt one of his legs slide in between mine and I shuddered.

  His mouth came down to rest just above my ear.

  "Elaina... Why have you been avoiding me?" His hot breath fanned my ear. I held in a moan.

  "I-I don-don't kn-know," my breathing was turning into pants as I felt his tongue flick out and lick my ear.

  "Oh, I think you do." I shook my head and he froze slightly, "You don't remember the details of the night, do you?" His voice was pained and he made a slight whimpering sound. My body only heated at the sound and I wanted to comfort him. My body pushed into his and I grinned slightly when I heard his moan. "Maybe we can make new memories..."

  His voice trailed off and I didn't pay much attention to what he had said as his tongue licked just at the sweet spot under my ear. A breathless gasp came from me and he bit and teased the skin with his teeth. I could feel is erection push into my mound and I gasp at how hard it was.

  My hand slowly touched it and he almost lost it. A very animalistic growl came from him and my back hit the wall, it wasn't painful but my feet lifted off the ground. His hot lips crashed down onto mine. There wasn't anything slow about this kiss. He kissed passionately, almost hungrily. His entire body was pressed up against mine.

  His hand ventured down my hip, across my thigh, and to my knee. His hand hitched my left leg up next to his hip and I hooked it around him, dragging him closer. He moaned at the same time I did, pressing closer and closer yet it didn't seem like enough.

  My hands wound up across his chest and into his hair, pulling gently. He bit my lip in response and I opened my mouth for him. His hot tongue plunged inside. He explored my mouth for a little while before he let me take control.

  I had never taken control before so I was slightly hesitant. His tongue coaxed mine into his mouth. I explored a little while but when my tongue dragged across the top of his mouth, he groaned and took over the control again.

  My mind was muddled and I couldn't think straight with him this close.

  The clearing of a throat had my feet back onto the floor and Rane standing in front of me, almost protectively. Now that we were apart, my thoughts came back and I could think straight. My face was as red as a tomato as I looked at the elderly janitor from around Rane.

  "I-I got to go," I stuttered and slipped out of the room. I ran down the hall and out the door. I was halfway to my house before what had just happened hit me- full force.

  What was going on with me?

  Chapter 6: Elaina's POV

  It's been a month since the incident in the janitor's closet. We both have been avoiding each other. He seems to get a slightly pained and hurt expression on his face when he's near me before it gets replaced by no emotion at all. It would just be blank.

  He didn't seem to look at other girls though. He wasn't dating anyone, to the delig
ht of all of the single girls out there. They were always trying to get him to look at them but he didn't seem interested. His face sometimes showed disgust, which was surprising because he didn't seem the type to reject the sluts and hoes of the school.

  I can't complain though, it made me happier every time he rejected them. I had never paid him-or really anyone- much attention before that night. I still didn't pay any attention to anyone besides Layla-and now Rane.

  Thinking about Layla made me think of her problem. Layla, it turns out, did seduce him that night. I don't think she needed to do much seducing though. She also told me about how she ran in the morning yet I didn't get a reason why. I guess they talked about it, because they were together now. I was a little envious of her now, she was most definitely in love-after just a month!

  I always saw them together, happy of course. I never once heard about a fight that they had had so I was okay with it as long as he didn't break her heart. I would-in a heartbeat- tear of his balls and feed them to my neighbor's dogs. Then I would throw him off a bridge... Yeah, that's what I would do. I even told him that and he almost died choking on the drink he was drinking.

  He looked at me incredulously and only believed me when Layla said that I would seriously do it. He even looked slightly scared and looked to Layla for help, but she just shrugged.

  My mother, Linda, seemed to have pulled her shit together because she was looking better except for the occasional night when she would be up in her room with absolutely no light. She gave off a bad vibe sometimes and it freaked me out. I made Shane sleep with me every night or I would sleep with him. He didn't complain, he just did it. I silently thanked him for that.

  The chilly wind brought goose bumps to my flesh as I walked down the stone steps of the High School. Not many people were around, just the occasional druggie or person like me- taking my time in leaving. I pulled my hoodie tighter around me as the October wind blew at me. Halloween was only days away.

 

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