After Ross had left, she had said goodbye to Elisabeth and had crawled into bed. Rushe’s banging had woken her this morning. Since she hadn’t had time to clean, the place was a bit of a mess.
Ross carried her into her bedroom. Rushe snarled loudly as they entered, his head was turned up, his nostrils flared. Oh god! Her cheeks heated at the knowledge of what he was smelling.
“Get over it,” Ross growled.
“I’m sorry, I’ll change the sheets,” she blurted.
Rushe shook his head. “I’ll deal.” He still looked agitated. His entire frame was tense, his neck muscles roped. Even his jaw was clenched and his eyes were glowing softly. He looked really beautiful when he was pissed. Who was she kidding? He looked seriously handsome no matter what.
Ross gently placed her on her bed, ignoring Rushe’s obvious discomfort. He pulled the covers up over her, tenderly sweeping the hair from her face. His eyes were filled with concern. “I’m really sorry this happened to you. Brant made it clear that Titan will be punished, but I will make good on my promise to hurt him. I will most likely end up killing him for his actions today. That male had better show serious remorse because he cannot be allowed to do something like that ever again.”
Becky gasped. “No. I’ve caused enough trouble for you already. You’ve already been disowned by your coven. Don’t go after that dickhead. He’s not worth it.” She took a deep breath. “I told you, I’m over it.”
The bed dipped as Rushe sat down next to her on the other side of Ross. He ran his hand up and down her arm. “No, you are not over it. You can keep telling yourself that but I can see that it isn’t true. Know that we are here for you in every way. You don’t have to keep this inside. You don’t have to pretend with us.” He pulled the covers further up, tucking them in just below her arms and again resumed his rubbing and stroking of her arm. She looked from one male to the other. Both had set aside their differences for her. Both wanted her. Suddenly, and for some unknown reason, emotion welled inside her. She couldn’t exactly say why.
Was it all that had happened today? Or simply Rushe’s words of encouragement to open up and not pretend she was strong. The truth was, she wasn’t. Her lip wobbled so she bit down on it. When her eyes filled with tears she blinked several times not wanting to cry. Yet, no matter how hard she tried, she could not stop the tears from falling.
“That’s it. Let it at all out, sweetheart. We are here.” Ross’ voice was gravelly.
She glanced up through her veil of tears, noticing how Rushe swallowed thickly. It made her even sadder to see how her tears were affecting these two warriors.
This was terrible, she was allowing herself to fall for them. Both of them. It couldn’t get much worse.
Using just the pad of his thumb, Rushe wiped away the hot drops as they cascaded down her cheeks. He leaned in and hugged her, pulling her against his hard body. God, it felt good. Too freaking good.
Ross growled softly. It was a sound that she had come to recognize as frustration. “Move over.”
Rushe obeyed by moving back, pulling her along with him. Becky was still crying softly, unable to stop. It had been a very long time since someone had cared this much about her. Ross’ big body flanked her front side. He slid his arm around her waist.
“It is only normal for you to feel this way.” Rushe’s hot breath fanned the back of her neck as he spoke. He still gently caressed her arm, his big body pressed up flush behind her.
“I don’t think I’m crying because of what happened earlier.” She sniffed, wiping away more tears as they fell. She shouldn’t be telling them this.
“Why are you crying then?” Ross asked.
She cracked open her lids, his dark, fathomless eyes stared back at her. They softened as their gazes locked. Rushe seemed to hold his breath behind her.
“It’s just been so long,” she stammered. “You know what? Forget I said anything. I have a big mouth.”
“You have a lush, delectable mouth, perfect for many things that I would prefer not to discuss right now. Too big? No,” he shook his head, “the term I would use for describing your lips is fucking perfect.” His eyes dropped to her mouth for a second and his gaze heated.
“Human females are highly emotional. It is important to talk about your feelings often and it’s very important that the male in your life listens.” Rushe gave Ross a hard look.
She couldn’t help but giggle. “Did you read that in the Cosmo?” she asked through her tears.
She felt him shift behind her. “Only the part about human females being emotional and needing to talk often. The rest is kind of obvious.”
Rushe was freaking perfect since guys didn’t normally feel the need to listen much.
After a long pause, with only her sniffs and soft whimpers to break the silence, Ross eventually spoke. “Cosmo?” He grinned and shook his head. “I will forget I heard that.” He paused for a beat. “Speak to us, sweetheart. I am also a very good listener.” Ross smirked at Rushe.
She had to suppress a groan. They were both seriously irritating but somehow also seriously, freaking perfect. “It’s been a very long time since someone cared so much about me. Aside from Tanya, that is. It’s been really hard since she left Sweetwater.” She hardly saw her best friend anymore.
“What about the males you were with before?” Rushe growled, sounding angry. His body tensed up. “Surely they cherished you? Listened when you needed them to?”
She giggled. “Not really, but that’s not what I mean. This is the first time that anyone besides my nanny and sometimes my parents tucked me in, and it’s been many, many years since that happened. I was probably only five or six the last time my parents came to say good night and even before then it was a rarity.”
“What?” Ross’ eyes were wide. “Did they make you go to bed all on your own?”
“Like I said, I had nannies who took care of me. My parents are both surgeons, very career-orientated. They travelled often, I guess, they didn’t have much time.”
“What is a nanny?” Rushe asked.
“A nanny is someone hired to look after children,” she answered, thankfully her tears had mostly dried. “My parents were quite difficult and demanding so we went through lots of hired help. I learned at a young age not to become too attached to any of my caregivers.”
Ross looked confused. “You mean humans pay people money to look after their children?” He didn’t sound like he believed her.
Rushe growled softly behind her. “That’s not right.”
“Not all humans.” She managed a smile. “But it does happen, especially with parents who are very busy. They hire people to clean the house and yes, very often, to look after the children.”
“That doesn’t make sense. Someone who is being paid to do this will not love you the same as your own flesh and blood. Will not give you the same level of care. It should be the responsibility of the family,” Ross actually looked angry, “most especially of the birthparents, to look after the children.” He shook his head. “Vampire children are rare. They are cherished …” His eyes lit up. “Raised by their parents and family … hell, the entire coven.” He paused, looking thoughtful. “Did you not miss your parents?”
Becky felt tears well. No please not again.
“I can tell that this is upsetting you.” Ross carefully brushed the tears from her face. “It is not my intention to make you upset. Forget I said anything. I did not mean to put down your parents.”
Rushe pushed himself even tighter against her. “Tell us what we can do to make you feel better. We will hold you for as long as it takes.”
How utterly sweet. They were both so sweet that it gave her the courage to keep talking. It felt kind of good to get this off her shoulders. “It is upsetting only because you’re right. My mom and dad paid other people to take care of me, I was more of a thing to them, a possession rather than a child to love and raise. Later on I became a gigantic disappointment to them.” She felt her face cru
mple, she cried harder, putting a hand up to cover her face. “I’m so sorry, I’m whining and I must look awful.”
“You could never look awful. Even with a runny, red nose and swollen eyes, you are the most beautiful female I have ever seen.” Rushe lifted himself onto his elbow so that he could look down at her face.
She chuckled and used a hand to cover her face. “No, don’t look, I’m a mess.”
“I will always want to look at you, Becky. Even when you are crying, even when you are heavily swollen with our child …” She gasped and shook her head, but he ignored her. “Even when you are old and grey and your skin—”
“Enough.” She had to laugh at his comments.
“I will admit, wolf,” Ross narrowed his eyes at Rushe, “you are smooth in a rough kind of way. I am going to have to up my game if I want to win our bet.”
Becky sucked in a lungful of air. “What freaking bet?”
Ross grinned. “Nothing to concern yourself over right now. How could your parents see you as a disappointment? Look at all that you have achieved.” Ross gestured around her. “You are a wonderful healer. You’re very beautiful, are highly intelligent. In short, you are everything a male could ever wish for.”
She narrowed her eyes at Ross. “If you think you can sidetrack me, you are mistaken. I’ll carry on this conversation but you are so telling me about your little bet.” She took a deep breath, steeling herself for what she was about to say. “I am a disappointment to my parents. They had hoped that I would become a surgeon. You know, follow in their footsteps.” She sniffed. “They were actually insulted when I told them I wouldn’t be studying any further. That I was happy remaining a lowly general practitioner.” She paused, licking her lips. “When I married my ex-husband, it was like I was finally doing something right for the first time. I wanted so badly to make them happy.” Had Tanya been right about her marrying Carter for that reason?
“Husband?” Rushe asked with a low growl. His hand tightened on her arm.
“Isn’t that the same as a mate?” Ross’ eyes narrowed.
“I told you that I was with someone and that I didn’t love him so I left him. I tried to make it very clear to the both of you that I’m not mate material. That I don’t do forever. Yes, I was married or mated ‒ whatever you want to call it. The whole thing was a big mistake. I guess,” she took a deep breath, “I have just realized that I only did it to please my parents. Although I was attracted to him …”
Both males growled and the whole bed vibrated, making her giggle. “Ohhh, that actually felt kind of nice.”
“It’s not funny,” Rushe said, his voice low. “We don’t like that you were with other males.”
“Hate it,” Ross bit out, his jaw tense. “I might just hunt them down and kill them.”
“No, don’t do that.” She could hear the panic in her voice.
“Why?” Rushe growled. “Do you still have feelings for your husband?”
“Ex-husband, and the answer is no, not at all.”
“What about other males?” Ross’ eyes were dark, they seemed to look right into her.
“What other males?” she asked, feeling her brow crease. “I may have dated a few guys but I assure you that I no longer want them. That’s kind of my problem. I fall in love easily and out of love just as easily.”
Rushe shook his head. “I’m not talking about males from your past. We would have to kill anyone who touched you now,” Rushe said, his voice sounding dead calm.
“Titan will die, as will any other male, even if you were to allow them to touch you.” Ross’ voice was so deep that it caused goose-bumps to form on her arms. It also pissed her off.
She rolled onto her back, pushing them away as she did. “What do you think of me? That I’m some kind of slut who sleeps with every guy who crosses her path?” Her hands shook she was so angry. “Well, despite what happened with the two of you, I’m not some bed-hopping hussy. I might flirt a bit but I don’t fuck around. I don’t like what you are insinuating.”
They at least had the good grace to look really sheepish, which helped her to calm down. “No, I don’t plan on fucking anyone else. From the sounds of things I won’t get to have sex with the two of you either. So there, okay? You won’t have to kill anyone.”
Both males visibly relaxed. Rushe lay back down, he urged her to move back into his embrace. “I’m sorry, honey.” He smiled and she melted … a little.
“We’re both sorry.” Ross squeezed her hip. “We can’t help but get possessive over you. It’s a miracle that we’re not killing one another even now.”
“No,” her eyes widened, “please don’t. I couldn’t take it.”
“It explains why you left your last mate.” Ross looked pensive. “You didn’t really love him. You mated him because your parents wanted you to.”
“I may have married him because of my parents, but it doesn’t explain why I am the way I am.” She looked at them both in turn. “I just can’t stay in love. I think I might be wired that way. I dated quite a few guys before settling down, I left them all. I’ve had one serious relationship since my divorce and I left him too.” She tucked a wayward strand of hair behind her ear. “I would end up leaving you too.” She looked somewhere between them, her focus on the far door because she really didn’t know which one to address.
“You would have to pick one of us first,” Ross said, his voice a rich baritone.
Her mouth opened and closed and opened again. She shook her head. “I would rather not.”
“Not right this second … but soon, sweetheart … soon.” Ross threw her a grin that just about melted her panties. “I want to hear more about your parents and why you think you are a disappointment to them.”
“When I told them that I was divorcing Carter, they gave me an ultimatum.” She squeezed her eyes shut, remembering the pain.
“What kind of ultimatum?” Ross asked. Rushe took her hand, giving it a squeeze.
“They said if I divorced Carter, I would be cut out of their Will. That they would want nothing further to do with me. Guess what?” She swallowed hard, trying not to cry. “They stuck by their decision. I am their only child and they want nothing to do with me. I’ve been told that Carter visits them with his new wife once a week. How freaking creepy is that?”
“Well good riddance. To all of them,” Rushe growled. “I’m really sorry, Becky, but sometimes it’s not actually worth having people like that in your life. Even if they are family.”
Ross looked furious, his eyes burned. They darkened up a whole lot in the space of a few seconds. “You didn’t love this male. You didn’t want to be with him and decided to leave him, and your parents cut you out of their lives? You are their child. Their daughter.” He shook his head. “I’m inclined to agree with Rushe. You know that we both have strong feelings for you. We both see you as our future mate. I don’t want to concern you with that right now, but know that we are both here for you. We both care for you and want the best for you.”
Rushe moved in closer. “We want to date you. Please give us a chance, get to know us. In the end, you can choose one of us in the knowledge that we will cherish you always.” His voice was low, with a little bit of a husky edge. “I, for one, know that I would love to tuck you in each and every night. Neither of us would give you such bullshit ultimatums. No wonder you are afraid of loving with everything that you are and everything that you have.” He paused, shaking his head. “No wonder you hold this part of yourself away.”
“It irritates me to say it, but Rushe is absolutely right,” Ross growled. “I can’t believe I’m agreeing this much with a shifter. I never thought the day would come when vampires and shifters would see eye-to-eye on something, but that day is here.” He took in a deep breath. “You do realize that you do hold a part of yourself away, Becky, don’t you? You close yourself off and then make sure that you leave the male first. You don’t trust enough that someone is there for the long haul, that someone can really lov
e you for you and be there for you always.” He licked his lips, breaking eye contact with her for a second before re-establishing the connection. Her heart raced at a mile a minute. “You make sure that you end it first. Isn’t that right, Becky?” He kept his eyes locked with hers.
Could it be? Was he right? Surely not. “I don’t think it’s as cut and dry as that. I didn’t have the best of childhoods, but that doesn’t automatically mean that the relationship I had with my parents would affect future relationships with a partner. That’s too freaking talk-show to be true.”
“It sounds about right to me,” Rushe said. “You were raised by strangers. Lots of different strangers who never stuck around. People paid by your parents, who cared more about their work and making money than about being with their only daughter.” He sighed.
Becky felt her eyes well with tears again. A couple of months ago she had reached out to her mother. In a moment of weakness, Becky had called her. Was it so bad that she needed to hear her mother’s voice? She had spent her whole life looking for approval, trying hard to do everything that they wanted, everything that they required. All she wanted was to be seen, acknowledged and maybe loved.
Her mother had told her to never to call again and had put the phone down in her ear. Up until then, she had lived in hope that they were just overreacting. That they would get over her divorce and her not being a surgeon. She had prayed that they would get over the glaring fact that she wasn’t the perfect, debutante type.
“You’re right, they never looked back. Was I such a terrible daughter?” Her voice was a mere whisper. This whole day was rubbing her raw, making her feel things she hadn’t felt in a long time.
She noticed how the males exchanged concerned glances with one another.
“It had nothing to do with you,” Ross growled, sounding fierce. If she didn’t know him, she would be afraid but she knew that he meant her no harm.
She shook her head. “You can’t possibly know that.” She sniffed, trying hard to keep from crying more.
The Chosen Series Box Set: Books 1 - 3 Page 89