by Shane Morgan
We sip slowly while staring at each other. Sydney harrumphs after swallowing. “Mm. That’s good but different.”
“Yeah. You get used to it.”
Silence surrounds us, with only the sound of crickets and faint music in the distance. I set my glass down at the side of the hot tub. Sydney does the same and sidles closer.
“You know, there’s a saying, the couple that hot tubs together stays together.”
I smirk. “Oh yeah?”
“Yeah.” She eases over into my lap and leans her head back against my shoulder. I loop my arms around her waist.
We peer up at the stars until Sydney starts to make sensual movements in my lap, causing lustful groans to escape me. “Uhh…whoa…okay…” I grip her tighter and begin kissing on her neck.
She moans as she continues the motions. She’s never done this classic Cruel Intentions move before, and I’m enjoying it quite a bit. She has my blood pumping faster. My toes are starting to curl.
Turning around, Sydney shoves her mouth to mine, kissing me with hunger. I groan and squeeze her body, needing more.
She pulls away. When I try to kiss her again, she moves back.
This girl knows how to drive me mad, and I’ve noticed she relishes having such power over me.
“Here’s a secret,” she mutters in a sexy tone. “I fantasized about you the night of Kelly’s pool party.”
“Really?” I blurt, surprised yet gratified.
Sydney chugs the rest of her wine and climbs out of the tub, grabbing a towel. “Coming, Parker?” She giggles and walks inside the house.
I almost fall on my ass, hurrying from the tub. I finish the wine, snatch up the towel, and hasten to the bedroom.
62
Parker retrieves a blue Moped from the storage room after breakfast, and we ride to a tourist center close by. I turn into an ecstatic kid in a candy store when I learn he’s planned a helicopter tour.
Once we’re up in the air, I squeeze his hand and grin from ear-to-ear, amazed by the breathtaking aerial view of all the lakes, creeks, and mountains. We fly over the beautiful Emerald Bay and Eagle Falls, and Parker promises we’ll go on a hike there tomorrow.
Returning to the center, we have lunch at the café nearby. I notice a few watchful eyes, probably because we’re an interracial couple, but I don’t let it bother me. I’m having too much fun and refuse to allow anything to diminish that.
I convince Parker to stop at a store for souvenirs, and we snap more pictures before riding back to the house.
The rest of our time in Lake Tahoe is spent checking out trails, going on group tours, kayaking for the first time, and drawing closer to one another.
We spend the last day and night at the house, mostly in bed. Sharing every little thing we can think of, making love, listening to music, and falling deeper.
“We still have a few more weeks before you leave,” he says, caressing my arm.
I sigh deeply on his chest. “I’m dreading the day.”
Parker takes hold of my left hand and traces my fingers with his thumb.
“I’ll fly to Seattle for the holidays and spend all of them with you.” This makes me smile. He keeps going. “You can show me all the places you love, the food you like. Whatever. I wanna see it all.”
I turn, so I’m facing him, and kiss his lips once. “Do you know the moment I fell for you, Parker? Like, really fell?”
He smirks, and says with confidence, “The mud run, when I helped you at the wall.”
A shaky gasp leaves me. My eyes water.
Parker cradles my face, voice a near whisper when he asks, “Am I right?”
I gulp and tell him softly, “You sure are. But how do you know that?”
He drifts near my lips, teasing a kiss. “Because I felt it. At that moment, I knew I had you.”
“Ugh.” I roll my eyes. “You’re something else, Parker Prescott.”
“I love you, too.”
It’s bittersweet, leaving Lake Tahoe. But I’m happy for the memories we made and look forward to returning like Parker swears.
The remainder of July is all about spending time with friends and enjoying the summer together. The days fly by quickly. As August approaches, the ache builds, and I know without a doubt, I’m going to fall apart the second I land in Seattle and realize I won’t be with my boyfriend again until the holidays.
It’s now the day before I leave. The more I think about it, the sadder I feel.
Nia bursts into my room just as I pull on a maxi dress. “Let’s spend the day together. We’ll go by Coleman’s later.”
She’s already dressed in a romper and wedge sandals. Curls straightened and styled neatly in a ponytail.
I look at my unpacked suitcase on the bench, then flick back to Nia. “Sure. I rather hang out than pack.”
The instant I put on my flats, she grasps my hand and pulls me from the room.
“See you later, Mom,” Nia hollers to Aunt Jackie as we tread by the living room.
“All right,” Aunt Jackie replies. “Don’t stay out too late. Remember your flight’s early in the morning, Syd.”
“K,” I yell back.
We continue out the door. Nia drives to Laguna Beach, and we walk around the shopping plaza. She purchases a charm bracelet and scarf for me for the colder weather in Seattle.
After lunch and ice-cream, we stroll around Treasure Island Park. The bright sky is a contrast to the way I feel inside.
Coming to a stop at the edge of the park where the grass meets the sand, Nia bumps my arm playfully. “I’m seriously gonna miss you.”
I smile for the first time that day. “I’m gonna miss you, too.”
“At least we can call each other and text. Plus, we have holidays and summer breaks.”
“Yeah,” I murmur, blinking away to the ocean.
Nia loops her arm around mine. “Are you gonna be okay? With Parker, I mean. I see how sad you are about leaving him.”
I roll my shoulders. “It’s gonna be hard, but we said we’d try. It’s not like we’ll be apart forever. Just a temporary situation until we finish college.”
Nia seems doubtful that my relationship will last that long, but I don’t let it bother me. I understand why anyone would think Parker and I are crazy. We’re so young. But we’re so in love.
She jolts me lightly. “Come on. The guys are doing a little sendoff for you. Don’t worry, Coleman didn’t go crazy with invites. It’s just our group of friends. Minus Leighton, of course.”
“Sad she’s not here. But that’s nice of Penn. It lifts my spirits a little.”
“Good. Let’s go.”
Nia drives a few minutes to the Monarch Beach area, pulling over at Coleman’s house. Parker comes outside as we’re walking up the entrance.
“Hey, babe.” He swoops his arm around me and kisses me.
“Hey,” I whisper, managing a smile for him.
We continue inside.
The guys are chilling in the living room. Coleman’s parents have a lovely house. I admire it every time I stop by. So modern with white walls and gray furniture.
“There she is,” Davidson greets. He pushes Parker aside and leans in for a tight hug.
“You can let go now,” Parker jokes, smacking his friend’s arm.
Davidson chortles as he backs away. “You’re a cool girl, Sydney. I like how happy you make my friend.”
His comment results in a smile. I glance at Parker. He shrugs and dips his head.
A sly look on his face, Davidson moves past me to talk to Nia. “So, when are you flying to Palo Alto? Wanna leave together?”
She sucks her teeth. “Nope. I’m good.”
As he continues bugging her, Coleman and Nunez come over.
“We didn’t get to hang out a lot,” Nunez says. He sneers at Parker. “Cause he just kept you to himself. But I get it. You’re special to him.” He gives me a warm embrace. Backing away, he adds, “All the best to you.”
“Thanks,
Brian,” I reply on a chuckle. “I’m not leaving for good.”
Parker adds, “Yeah, guys, relax.”
Coleman pats my shoulder. “Well, that rental is gonna look brand new by the time you come back to Cali.”
I wrinkle my forehead and turn to my boyfriend.
An innocent expression appears. “Couldn’t resist. You liked it so much.”
“Uhh. Parker…” I shake my head in wonder. “No wonder people think we’re crazy. You rented a beach house for me.”
“He’s whipped,” Coleman teases, winking at me. “But he’s also very wealthy.” He chuckles after.
Parker puts his arm around me and kisses my cheek.
Coleman gestures for everyone to go outside to the deck. There are snacks and drinks on the table.
Each of us picks up a glass when Davidson raises his to me, saying, “To Sydney. One of the nicest girls to ever attend Spencer.”
“Aw, thanks, Cory.”
We clank glasses and finish the drinks in one swift move. Afterward, we chill for a while, reminiscing.
Parker cuddles me in his arms. He’s mostly quiet as the guys go on and on, giving jokes.
As evening falls, I hug them again and head out to the car with Nia and Parker.
He grips my hand before I get in. “I’ll take you back,” he says firmly.
“Not too late,” Nia reminds, echoing Aunt Jackie’s words.
“Okay. See you back at the house.”
She takes off, and I drive with Parker to the rental property.
I stop in the entryway and stare at him as he locks the door behind us.
“What?” he asks, closing the gap.
“Can’t believe you rented this house. We won’t even be here.”
He stares at me with intensity as he replies, “It’s our getaway spot. Like the yacht. I’ll keep it available for us whenever we want it.”
“You’re something else,” I whisper.
Parker kisses me hard and insatiably, hands steering all over my body.
We hasten downstairs to the bedroom, strip out of our clothes as fast as possible, and lose ourselves in one another.
I’m not sure why, but tears trickle out as Parker makes love to me. He wipes them away and spreads kisses over my face.
When we muster the strength to break apart, we get dressed and go back upstairs.
My hand trembles in Parker’s grasp as we walk to the front door.
“We’ll be all right,” he reassures me as if he can hear my thoughts. Maybe he just knows me so well now.
I take a deep breath, let it sink in, and murmur, “We will.”
He drives me home and walks with me to the front door. We stand facing each other.
Parker lets go of my hands and touches my neck.
“I’ll see you in the morning,” he says, voice rasp.
I nod. “I’ll text you when I’m in bed.”
“Don’t,” he refuses. “It’ll make you cry. Let’s just call it a night.”
I understand. He’s having a difficult time, too. Best to spare ourselves until tomorrow.
Parker lowers his head to kiss me. Then he whispers at my mouth, “I love you more than anything in this world. You believe me?”
“Yes. Because I feel the exact same way. I love you, Parker.”
He kisses me again, pries himself away, and quickens to his car. He doesn’t look back, just speeds off.
I head inside the house, glimpsing Aunt Jackie and Uncle Terrance in the living room, sipping wine. Since I’ve been home for summer, I notice they do this at least three nights a week when he returns from work.
“Hey, you,” Uncle Terrance says, getting up from the sofa. Aunt Jackie stands as well.
I pause in the archway. Uncle Terrance comes over to wrap me in his warm embrace. “This is always gonna be your home. We’ll miss you, dearly.”
“That’s right, honey,” Aunt Jackie chimes in. “You can always run back.”
Grateful, I give her a hug once Uncle Terrance lets me go. “Thank you for everything.”
She pecks me on my cheek. “You’re my sister’s child. I will take care of you till my last breath.”
Uncle Terrance makes circles in her back, hearing the hint of sorrow in her tone.
“I’m sure my mom is as thankful as I am for all you’ve done.” I give her hand a loving squeeze. “I’m gonna finish packing and get some sleep.”
They nod and watch me walk away.
My tears are relentless. Just keeps falling as I pack my suitcase. I try to dry my face quickly at knocking on my door, but Nia realizes anyway when she enters.
She rubs my back and kisses my cheek. Without saying anything, she begins helping me pack.
I change for bed once my suitcase is all set. Nia climbs in beside me, offering comfort.
“I’ll sleep here, so you’re not lonely on your last night.”
“Thanks, cuz.” I smile through the tears and sob quietly in the dark with my cousin’s loving arms around me.
More than anything, I’ll miss Parker. And that’s the reason behind this dreadful ache in my chest.
63
After saying her goodbyes to her family, Sydney and I walk hand-in-hand to the departure area.
We stop near the escalators and face each other. My throat feels tight. It burns. But I fight to stay strong in front of my girl.
“We can do this,” I say. “We’ll be fine.”
Sydney nods. But her features are sad.
“Don’t you cry,” I plead, resting my forehead against hers. “You’ll wreck me.”
“I won’t.” Even as she whispers this, her eyes gloss.
I pull her into my arms for a long embrace. Her body quivers against mine. She snivels at my chest.
“It’s gonna be all right,” I whisper, reassuring Sydney and myself when, in truth, I don’t think it will.
She eases away, lifts her chin, and squares her shoulders. “I’m walking away now.”
I nod and offer a partial smile. “I love you. Call me when you get to Seattle.”
She draws a deep breath and says, “I love you, too.”
Sydney touches my neck as I slope my head and lean in for a lasting kiss. This isn’t goodbye. It’s just a temporary separation. She’s still mine.
Backing away, Sydney turns and steps onto the escalator. I manage a smile for her and wave when she peers back briefly, remaining in the spot until she’s no longer in sight.
My body starts to shake. A type of heartache I’ve never experienced ambushes me. I feel a flood of tears pushing toward an exit.
Her family has worried expressions when I walk by and wave to them.
I quicken out of the airport. Reaching my car, I drop my head over the steering wheel and break down. I cry like a baby for Sydney, already anticipating the next time I hold her, and terrified I might not get the chance again.
As I collapse back against the seat and peer out the windshield at a plane soaring into the sky, I wonder how in the world I’m going to make it through these months when I can barely survive a day.
I laze around my room, waiting for Sydney’s call. When it finally comes, I clear my throat and try to sound normal when I answer.
“Hey. Made it there okay?”
She breathes intensely before replying, “Yeah. I just got home. My dad and I are going out to eat.” She doesn’t sound as depressed as I feel. But it’s only been a few hours.
“What are you doing later?” she asks after a sigh.
I sit at the edge of my bed. I’ll probably drink with my friends and try to drown this pain. But I can’t tell her that. She’ll worry. Perhaps catch the next flight back.
“Uh, nothing really. Just hang at the house.”
Her chilling breaths fill the line as we both fall silent.
“I’ll text you when I get home from dinner,” she says.
“Cool.” Another pause. “Love you, Sydney.”
“Love you.”
I flop b
ack in the bed once she ends the call.
Gripping the phone, I press my eyes shut and pray it’ll be Thanksgiving when I open them again.
Tapping on the door jolts me back to reality. I straighten as Mom enters. A supportive smile on her face. “Sydney got there all right?”
“Yeah,” I answer, stomach feeling sick.
Mom angles her head while studying me. “Wanna talk about it?”
My eyes and throat tingle. “I don’t know what I’m gonna do. I really love her, Mom. What if Sydney decides long-distance isn’t gonna cut it and breaks up with me?”
She comes over and sits at my side. “What’s meant to be will be.” She rubs my arm lovingly. “I know it hurts right now. You’ll get through it.”
“Will I?” I mumble under my breath, looking down.
Mom kisses my cheek and squeezes my hand. “You should eat something.”
I shake my head. “Don’t have much of an appetite.”
“You’ll scare Sydney if you look like a skeleton the next time you see each other. Now come on.”
She straightens and walks to the door.
I grumble, wipe my face harshly, and follow her out of my room.
August zips by with lots of phone calls, texts, and FaceTime. Before I know it, I’m two months into my first semester at USC. Time doesn’t ease the pain at all. If anything, it grows more with each passing day.
I make new friends. I have a roommate who’s fun and easygoing. But none of that feels exciting.
It’s as if I’m going through the motions lifelessly. I feel empty. Something’s missing. I don’t want to be here without Sydney.
At the end of another long week, I call her for our usual Friday night chat. She plasters on a smile in the live. It doesn’t reach her eyes. I can tell she’s trying. She doesn’t want to show how much she’s hurting. We’ve both been doing that.
It’s always difficult, but I manage to smile back. “Hey. How was your week?”
“Good. I went to a soccer match today with my roommate. The university lost, but it was fun.” She pauses and clears her throat. “What about you? How was your week?”