Unitary
Page 5
And if I’m pregnant, even I can’t deny that the prophecy is probably true.
And that the guys are right as well.
I don’t want to be the prophecy. I don’t want to be the person multiple races look toward for revitalization and the continuance of their species. I don’t want that responsibility. I don’t want that deed. I don’t want to be a brooding mare for the Primals. I want my own life. I want to live and love and cherish the life I have. The life that is always being manipulated by circumstances beyond my control.
Josie helps me sit down on the toilet before she rummages around underneath the bathroom sink. She hands me a small cardboard box, then she slips out to give me some privacy. My hands are shaking as I unravel the pregnancy test. I do my best to use it as the directions specify, then I cap it off and set it on the bathroom counter.
As I clean myself up, my bad decisions race to the forefront of my mind. Theo and Norway. Sebastian and the cabin. Each of them made in the heat of the moment. I am a strong woman. I pride myself in it. I’ve somehow been able to tolerate the incessant arguing of full-grown males who want to throw themselves at me. I’ve somehow made it through the death and resurrection of my husband. I’ve somehow survived figuring how I wasn’t wholly human and that my parents were slaughtered and that some sort of war to wipe out all humans is coming.
But I was weak to them. To Theo’s comfort and Sebastian’s tongue. I was weak to them in that moment, despite proving myself to be the definition of strength. I don’t need them until I do. I didn’t need Theo until I did. Underneath those stars as my legs straddled his body. I didn’t need Sebastian until I did. In the rickety cabin by the fire as his tongue licked my wound closed.
I had wanted both of them equally. Fully. And during the moment, I was unashamed.
Now, I’m not sure what I can believe or feel.
My ethics tell me I’ve cheated on my husband. He’s alive, even though I buried him. Which means I’m still married. But to what end? He clearly isn’t human any longer, but does that really change anything? Does that change the vows we took? Until death do us apart, that was what we said. And there’s a burial plot with his name on it that marks the end of our marriage.
So does his resurrection mean I’ve been unfaithful to him?
The thought alone brings tears to my eyes. I could never be unfaithful to Kyle. And yet, it doesn’t feel that way. I care for Theo. And I care for Sebastian. And the connection I shared with each of them during our moments of reckoning was passionate and heady and filled with a care even I couldn't deny.
A love I can’t deny even now.
I don’t know what to think. But as my eyes pan up to the test sitting on the bathroom counter, I know what I have to do.
I have to pick it up and look at it. Because whatever I find will change the course of my timeline. It will change my dynamic with the guys. It will choose who I am attached to for the rest of my life if I am pregnant. Even though I don’t want it to. I don’t want them to leave my side. Their fighting is endless, but they’ve been on this journey with me from the beginning. And there’s merit in that. There’s merit in their devotion and their dedication I can’t deny.
But if I’m pregnant, it will attach me to one of them forever.
And I risk losing the rest of them.
Including my own husband.
I stare at the test and consider tossing it away. But as the nausea rolls up my throat again, I know I have to look at it. I grab the trash can next to me and place my face into it, my body shaking as my pants shiver around my ankles.
“Clarissa? You okay?” Josie asks. “Have you taken the test yet?”
“I have,” I choke out. “Just—hold on.”
I hear the door squeak open as I wipe my mouth off with my arm.
“Have you looked at it?” she asks.
“Not yet.”
“Allowing your life to flash before your eyes?”
“Something like that.”
“Do you want me to look at it?” she asks.
I have to be strong. If I’m the prophecy, then I need to accept that. And my fate along with it. Whatever the cost, if the prophecy is my future then I can’t deny it. I can’t run from it. It’s coming, whether I want it to or not.
And a sudden wave of strength surges through the marrow of my bones.
“Nope,” I say. “I’ve got it.”
Chapter 7
Vlad
As I patrol the border of the woods, I hear a few voices stumble upon me. I duck down beneath the snow, burrowing into it and allowing my eyes to peek out from beyond the mountain I’ve created. I recognize them. With their gear and their useless spears.
I still have no idea why the guards of the building carry them.
This is the fourth time in two days they have been out patrolling, but I’ve been ordered by Clarissa not to engage. This is simply to gather intel, and I need to bury my want to tear their throats out. I still don’t understand how Clarissa can command me. How she feels she can order me around. And worse, how my body yearns to listen to her. She’s strong. Stronger than any Primal female I’ve come across.
And it’s invigorating.
The guards approach me, and I swallow the animal inside. I’ve become very good at that. Controlling myself around Clarissa takes all the strength I have, but everything else she asks of me is easy because of it. There was a time in my life where I would’ve growled at a woman who tried to control me. A time where I would’ve pinned her down, ripped off her clothes, and fucked her until she moaned my name and begged for more. Aside from my father, I am the single strongest Alpha in my Russian village.
And I take pride in that.
But Clarissa isn’t weak to me. In fact, she frequently bucks up against me. And instead of it making me angry, it pulls me in further. Deeper into her web of uniqueness. There’s a part of me that can’t help but try to turn her head. I can tell by her interactions with the guys who she’s mated and who she hasn’t. The mere idea that she can take more than one mate is astounding. That is a trait usually saved for a male only. Women can accept more than one mate if they come to her, but she cannot prowl for more than one mate.
Clarissa, however, doesn’t seem to be held to the old laws. She’s new.
And it makes me salivate.
I know she’s mated with Theo. When she’s around him, she reeks of Bear. And I definitely know her and Sebastian have finally consummated whatever it is they have going on. It sprays from him whenever he’s around her. I know she might not ever look at me that way. I know the two of us might never get to indulge in whatever angry tryst flows between the two of us.
But it doesn’t stop me from wanting to try.
Clarissa doesn’t simply smell good. She isn’t simply a Primal mystery. She’s also a wonderful woman. She doesn't take “no” for an answer, and she expects the best of everyone at all times. She’s confident. Cocky, like me. She knows her worth, and she knows when she’s had enough, and she has no problems voicing it. Like whenever Sebastian and Toshi fight. She steps in and nips it in the bud, and they both back down every time.
I’ve never seen a woman command a room the way she does, and it makes my groin pulse.
I haven’t given up on catching her attention yet. She’s slowly coming around to me. Allowing me to be closer to her without going on her guard. And I love it because I enjoy the chase. This little game of cat and mouse. I enjoy her believing I could take her at any moment. The guard she always keeps up with me. It makes me more desperate to knock it down. To show her the man and the Wolf I can be and all of the wondrous sensations I can bring to her world.
Sensations I know Sebastian can’t elicit within her.
That is one thing I miss from my village. When women come through those gates, they’re looking to mate. It isn’t a shock what they are wanting. That they reek of sexual energy and desperate want. There’s no chase involved. No trust to be had. No wooing or courting or compliments giv
en to ease the pants off their bodies.
I like the chase with Clarissa. The little dance we do.
It gives me the chance to indulge my Alpha male tactics, and it gives her a chance to trust me. The way I want her to.
“The Council’s on the move.”
The guard’s voice rips me from my daydream of her and throws me back to reality.
“Where are they headed?” the guard asks.
“To the war room. They want the last of our intel now.”
“But we haven’t breached the woods yet.”
“They’ve already done that. From the back. They got four miles in before a Wolf was spotted.”
Wait, the Council had come in from the back? That was where Sebastian was patrolling.
“We have to take what we know,” the guard says.
“Then we need to go sharpen our spears. Coat them in that serum Doryu’s made for us.”
“We’ll also need to label the spears. Make sure some of them are only projected at the males and some only projected at the females,” the guard says.
“Is that our job? I thought that was the dungeon master’s job.”
“You know the dungeon master has his hands full with that vile creature. Moving him from crate to crate every day. Taking tissue samples and trying to extract blood. No, idiot. This is our job, and we will make sure it’s done right.”
Shit. They’re talking about Kyle.
The guards stalk off through the snow, and I resist the urge to jump them. But there is no honor or pleasure in taking a man’s life from behind. I wait until they’ve hit the road before I shuffle out from underneath the snow, then I go bounding through the woods.
I have to find Sebastian.
My nostrils are flaring, and the cold of the winter is piercing my coat like it’s jelly. My claws are digging into the frozen tundra, catapulting me faster as I dodge the trees. I wind through hoards of humans posing and fighting and sharpening their weapons of destruction. I whip past houses and leap over gardens and growl when someone gets in my way.
I pierce the other side of the village and lift my nose into the air, then take a big sniff.
I can smell Sebastian, but it’s faint.
I let out a Primal howl and wait for Sebastian to respond. And when he doesn’t, panic floods my veins. What the hell had those men done to him?
I bound through the woods as humans called after me.
It takes an hour of search before I come across him in a trap. A massive metal contraption seated with lead and chomping down on his entire leg. It’s a fucking bear trap, and it’s dripping with a green substance I can’t identify.
And Sebastian is visibly throbbing on the ground.
My jaw grips the metal, and I stomp on the other end with my foot. I can feel the lead already draining me of my energy. The green substance is salty to the taste and makes me want to heave. But I manage to open the trap enough for Sebastian to wiggle out of it.
As I let go it snaps closed, and I can hear Sebastian whimpering. He bends down and licks himself clean, grimacing at the salty taste on his tongue. Humans are running up behind us to try and get a glimpse of the commotion, and I can tell Sebastian isn’t healing as quickly as he needs to be.
“Sebastian? What do you need?” I ask as I morph back into my human form.
A few humans toss me some clothes, and I quickly wrap up my trembling body.
“I need to know what the hell that shit is on that trap,” he says as he puts some clothes on.
“I’m not sure, but I think it’s a serum to try and slow us down. The Council’s on the move.”
“What?” Sebastian growls.
“I heard them talking at the other end of the forest. They’re heading to the war room, Sebastian. They’re gearing up for war.”
“Are you sure?” he asks.
“Yes. They were talking about coating their spears in different kinds of serum. One meant for males, and one meant for females. Sebastian, I think they’re going to use this war against humans as a way to turn them into their experiments.”
“Make the men stronger and the females able to reproduce with us,” he says.
“Yeah. It’s not good. We have to get back to the cabin and figure out what our next move is. Because the Council is coming. And Kyle’s still alive.”
“How do you know that?”
“You don’t sound happy about that,” I say.
Sebastian growls, and I can smell the jealousy oozing off him.
“Really? Her husband? It’s her damn husband.”
“Shut up and tell me what you know,” he says as he stands.
He’s still limping, and it starts the gears turning in my head.
“The guards were talking about a creature in the dungeon. A creature they have to keep transferring to a new cage every day. They’re doing experiments on him. Tissue samples and drawing blood. Kyle’s their Patient Zero.”
Sebastian’s eyes slowly crawl up to mine, and I can see something behind them. Pity? Sympathy? Is Sebastian feeling bad for the man he’s jealous of?
“We don’t tell Clarissa,” he says.
“I don’t think she’ll like that,” I say.
“She hasn’t been feeling well. This will only make her sicker. We don’t tell her.”
“Fine. But this serum that’s coated on the trap you got caught up in. Whatever it is, it weakened you. It’s preventing you from healing. So we can only assume they mean to use it against us in battle.”
“Yep. Sounds like the Council,” he says.
“You good to walk back?” I ask.
“I sure as hell am not gonna lean on you.”
“Trust me, I wouldn’t let you. But some of the humans might,” I say.
The two of us turn our heads and look out among the sea of faces. Worrying faces and troubling faces and faces set to go to war. They have no idea what they’re up against. What this Council is attempting to do to them. They’re brave, all of them. But they’re also very, very stupid.
“Come on,” I say. “Let’s get back to the cabin. It’s dinner time, and we’ve got a lot to talk about.”
And Sebastian follows me, though I know he doesn’t like it.
Chapter 8
Sebastian
Vlad and I get back to the cabin, and the soothing smells of dinner await us. Josie’s wheeling around the kitchen while Clarissa mind-numbingly sleeps on the couch. I’m worried about her. She’s been sick on and off for days, yet she won’t allow anyone to test her for anything. She’s convinced she can sleep it off, but I’m not sure that’s true. If she isn’t strong for this war, she’s going to have to sit it out. Which is going to start a fight between us.
And for once, it’s a fight I will not lose with her.
I limp over to the table and sit down in a chair. Toshi and Theo are eyeing me carefully as Vlad sits down beside me. He beckons for everyone to join and we all sit around, our mouths salivating as Josie begins to stack the table with food. A roast and vegetables and broth and bread. Ale and water and a dessert she’s only now popping in the oven. The four of us dig in and eat our fill as Clarissa continues to sleep on the couch. Her soft snores are comforting to me, but the cause of them is disconcerting.
She’s peaceful, but only when she’s asleep.
“We need to talk,” I say.
“I gathered a lot of intel from the edge of the forest today,” Vlad says
“Why is Sebastian limping?” Theo asks.
“I’m wondering that, too,” Toshi says. “Did the two of you get into it? Because honestly? I’ve been waiting for it to happen.”
“Shut your mouth, Cat, and listen,” I say.
“No need for the hostility. I thought we were past that,” Theo says.
“The Council is on the move. They’re preparing for war,” Vlad says.
“How is that news? Don’t we already know that?” Toshi asks.
“No, as in they’re heading to the war room. Tonight.”
> “Tonight?” Theo asks.
“According to what I heard. They’ve been sending guards to come in on all sides of the forest to scout out the woods. They know the humans and their village are back here,” Vlad says.
“They know?” Josie asks.
“They do. There was a bear trap set on the other side about four miles in. That was what Sebastian got caught up in. It was coated in a green sort of serum that’s preventing him from healing as quickly as a Wolf normally does,” Vlad says.
“So that’s why you’re limping,” Toshi says. “Not as exciting as I’d hoped.”
“Sorry to disappoint,” I grumble.
“So, wait. The Council’s meeting tonight about war?” Theo asks. “Then we need to get ready. If they’ve mapped out these woods up to our doorstep, they’re coming, and we don’t have the advantage.”
“And Clarissa’s sick,” Toshi says. “What are we going to do with her?”
“I’ll have to alert Joel,” Josie says. “He needs to know that we need to mobilize.”
“That’s a good idea,” Vlad says. “Because as soon as that meeting’s over, they’re coming.”
“How long is this meeting?” Theo asks.
“It depends. The last time the Council waged war, the meeting was only thirty minutes long. The time before that? The meeting was over four days.”
“Fuck,” I say. “So there’s really no way to know.”
“Welcome to the Council,” Vlad says.
“Did you get anything else?” Theo asks.
“Kyle’s still alive. They keep calling him the creature in the dungeon. He’s being moved into different cages every day and is constantly experimented on, according to the conversation I overheard.”
I watch as both Theo and Toshi cast their eyes over to Clarissa. To see if she’s still sleeping. She doesn’t need to be hearing any of this, but Theo and Toshi need to know. If Kyle’s alive, we made her a promise. Which means everything we can possibly know about Kyle and what he’s going through will help us when we find him.