He snorted and didn’t bother to reply as the back of the brush snapped with a warning blow against my ass. It burned, and tears came to my eyes, but I wanted him to do it again. “Are you ready?”
“Yes, Sir.”
Consecutive blows to my bottom proved just as painful. He wasn’t sparing my ass because of our love. But the longer he went at my flesh with the wooden brush, the harder he became and the more turned on I got. Soft moans and lusty gasps replaced my cries as Jake was the Dominant I longed for him to be. I wanted to be his perfect submissive, but I knew I was a long way from it.
We were flying high on the adrenaline when his final blows struck with such an intense, radiating pain that I thought I might come. He tossed the brush, and as it thumped to the floor, he said, “Ride me, baby.”
Leaning back onto the bed, he scooted back as I rapidly moved to straddle him. His cock was rock hard as I slid him inside of me. I was bouncing up and down with his hands on my hips as his dick pumped up into my wetness. With the welts on my ass, I felt the need to confess, “I don’t want to ever be without you.”
“You need to know we won’t be the same tomorrow, Anna.” His hands ran over the curves of my body, across the swell of my breasts, and landed together on my heart. “I want you to marry me.”
I blinked as I stopped moving. “… I… I… I can’t do that, Jake.”
“Because of how your father treated your mother?”
“Because I need to be independent,” I informed, fearing we might be over. “I don’t want ever to feel indebted to a man for my basic survival.”
His hand flew above his head as I kept him pinned beneath me. I heard the muffles of his breath from the rejection I brought on. My heart beat with agony in my chest, but it didn’t matter. I still couldn’t say yes.
“Do you need me to go?” I softly asked as I sat upright upon him. His hard dick still buried deep within me. “I can.”
“That’s just it, Anna.” He turned to look at me, but I couldn’t see his expression. His voice cracked as he admitted, “I’m scared of losing you.”
“I promise I will never leave you,” I whispered, lowering down and kissing his damp face. He was salty and sweet. “And I will be good to you. But I cannot marry you, Jake.”
“Even if…” He huffed as his sentiments seemed to tangle in his mind. “Regardless of what happens between us?”
I tilted my head, needing more of an explanation. “What do you mean?”
“I mean, if I take you to the dungeon and whip you, how do I know you won’t leave?”
“I want you to show me your darkness, Jake.” I gently kissed his lips. “I swear—no matter what you do in the dungeon, I will never leave your side. I cannot be without you. I need you to show me all of you. You are my best friend, my lover, and the Dom I crave. Don’t hide because you are scared I will run away. You ask for my trust as your submissive; I ask for yours as a woman. I will stand by your side forever.”
“Are these our wedding vows?”
In his arms, I blushed. “If you want…”
“I’m not always a good man, Anna. I’ve done bad things,” he confided, rushing his hands over my back. “I’ve killed men for money and kidnapped a girl because I wanted her to be mine.”
“I know,” I replied, laying against his chest. “But it doesn’t change how I feel about you. Nothing ever could.” With our commitment set, I made one final request, “I don’t want you to limit me in the dungeon. I need to be yours, Jake, but I need the freedom to explore my sexuality.”
“… You mean with Sir Dane?”
“I mean with anyone,” I clarified, bravely peering up. My fingers trickled over his beard and combed through his hair. “I want to be trained by you—for you. And I’m willing to play, but I will not be limited. And if you forbid me, it will harm our love. Love is fluid. I saw the jealous look in your eyes on the terrace, and I know what you did to Angelo, but I beg of you to not put me in the situation of having to choose. No matter how tempting others may be, the only one I want in the end is you, and I expect the same in return.”
He nodded. “You think I have enough power in the manor to make such promises?”
“I know you do,” I boasted, understanding he held equal power to Sir Dane. “If you trust me.”
“And what happens if I participate with another?”
“I will watch and if requested, engage,” I said, embracing the pain it would bring. “But I trust that you will come to my bed in the evening to fuck me senseless and remind me who I belong to. Just as I will you.”
His hands clasped around my body as he rolled us over. His broad chest pressed into mine as he readjusted his cock and secured himself inside of me. “I will never let you forget that you belong to me. Will you take my last name?”
“… Without marriage?”
I considered his offer for a moment. “I will think about it. Does that work?”
“It works for me,” he said, thrusting slowly. “I have no family. And I want my money and possessions to go to you should something ever happen to me.”
“Your work is dangerous…”
“I work for the men you were…” He stopped, unable to say it, but we both knew where he was going. “Gennaro and Lotus and hell, even Raniero, they’re all bad men, Anna.”
“I know, but the alternative was a man named Gilbert Saunders, who would have been bad for me,” I giggled, remembering why I went on the adventure to Las Vegas in the first place—freedom.
I found freedom in Jake’s heart. Glorious and divine. I knew Jake Ballister would never harm me, and he would hurt anyone who messed with me. “I didn’t want to marry him, so I left to become my own woman.”
“You have an independent streak a mile wide,” he said as my hands grazed over his chiseled guns. “I don’t think anyone could ever hold you back. And if they tried, they’d be met by your opposition. And mine.”
I didn’t know if my need for self-sufficiency was a problem, but I understood my random acts of rebellion could be. “I’m never bad intentionally,” I excused, smirking. “It just kind of happens.”
“You just kind of almost got yourself killed in Hawaii.”
“Are you certain Ryu wanted me dead?”
An uncomfortable feeling swept over me as I realized how close I had gotten to being eliminated. “I’m certain Keishi Nakamura wanted you dead.”
My hands effortlessly glossed over his ass as I asked, “But how do you know?”
“I know because I was supposed to kill you.”
Stuck beneath his weight, I gasped in horror. I didn’t know what to think. Everything Jake had done was to keep me safe. I couldn’t imagine him taking the job to hurt me, much less murder me. The more I thought about it, the angrier I became. I beat my fists against his hard biceps for not telling me sooner. “Why would you even take the job?”
“Because I knew if I didn’t, it would be given to someone else. And they would not think twice about taking you out. You were on a dangerous slope, Anna.”
“I’m so angry,” I sighed, frustrated. “You should’ve told me sooner.”
Thrusting into my soaked pussy, he pinned my arms above my head and kissed me hard. He nipped my lip like the asshole I knew. “If I had told you sooner, then you would have run and ended up looking down the barrel of someone’s gun.”
“I ought to call my safeword,” I muffled under my breath. I looked away, refusing to meet his gaze. His finger tipped beneath my chin. “Don’t touch me, Jake.”
“I’m fucking you,” he reminded with a hiss. “And I’m not stopping.”
“It’s not the same,” I whimpered, crying. Revealing how poorly wired my mind was, I grasped how my misalignment put our very relationship in jeopardy. I learned early on to be careful with associations; they could be a snake in a swan costume. I learned privacy with Jake and holding those trusted very close to my heart. In essence, I learned how to bond. Luca was worthy. Angelo was not. Still, I fough
t through my mixed emotions. “You cannot touch me like you love me.”
His mouth covered mine as his tongue ravaged me. Hips were thrashing, bucking in a messy melody of sex. He wasn’t going to up and leave, and I couldn’t weasel out from beneath him. “I do love you, and I can do whatever I want.”
“You cannot profess your love at the same time admit to taking money to kill me.”
“I can,” he declared with a determination. “We are together. And we will be together until the end. This is the end of the discussion.”
I hated Jake at that moment.
Mostly because I didn’t understand him, I saw his not revealing the whole truth to me as a lie. I’d accepted his love and trusted his protection, but never imagined there were other elements at work.
I wasn’t the only one playing multiple games with the mafia. His deals with Luca Raniero were like uncontained fires burning in my mind. I knew how far Luca would go to reach the pinnacle. With Jake and his piece on standby, Luca had secured a guaranteed spot at the big boy table.
The only two questions remaining were—who did I want to escort me to the table? And would I be next to him or at his feet?
Can’t Say No
CHAPTER 10
The next morning I awoke alone in the bed and did as expected. After cleaning up his room, I stripped off my clothes, grabbed my books, and left. I didn’t know what the day would hold for me as my relationship with Jake was caught between the forest and last night. I understood where we stood, but there were no guarantees of keeping our promises in the dark.
Naked and nervous, I meandered toward Wilma Manley’s office to receive my punishment or suck up for forgiveness. I wasn’t overly optimistic that she would gloss over my indiscretions, which led to a sprained ankle and a ten-day absence from my daily duties.
The week would be hell.
I stepped into the small waiting area of her office and noted Lele crying behind the glass. She was distraught and pleading. It was unusual for Lele because she didn’t often show any emotion. Concern for her well being flourished within my gut as I conjured the worst possible scenarios.
Manley spotted me, and shortly after that, Lele rose up and strode for the door. I politely opened it preemptively, thinking she might divulge her discussion with a few discreet words. Her hazel eyes hit mine. “Good luck, Anna. I’m leaving.”
I gasped and darted into Manley’s office as I queried, “What happened?”
“I will not discuss Lele’s situation with you, Miss Ford,” she said, standing up and turning away.
Stepping closer to the desk, I demanded, “Why is she leaving? Did you remove her?”
A few silent minutes passed between us as I kept looking out to the hallway. I thought if Jake or even Dane passed by, I could ask them what happened.
“Not everyone has your potential, Anna,” she said, thumping her ruler against her hand. “Not everyone wants to achieve as badly as you do.”
I eased around her desk to the window where she stood watching the gardeners. Her in her frumpy dress and me, completely nude. I’m sure we were quite the sight as I attempted a different approach, “Please, Lady Manley, tell me what happened.”
She refused to look at me, but from the corner of her mouth, she smirked. “The gala is an important function. Lele refused to do a presentation to showcase her skills, so I denied her application to Highlandale Hawthorne. I fully expected she would be able to handle the night.”
How hard could it be?
“… How many people?”
“Several dozen,” she whispered, almost distraught. “We’ve spent four months working with her in hopes that she could serve to represent the quality of our training and the future ideals of the school. The gala is to thank those who contributed financially to our endeavor. And Lele has let me down.”
Gazing down, I shuffled my feet and lifted on my toes several times to stretch my arches. “I won’t let you down.”
“We had planned on both of you being present for the gala. With all her practice, Lele would serve as the lead sub. The plan was for you to take on a lesser role. There is no way one sub, particularly one who has never even stepped foot in the dungeon, could serve an entire party.”
Rising on my toes, I swiveled to face her and dropped my hands behind my back. I straightened up, lifting my shoulders and showing off my curves. “I can do it.”
“Jake will not hear of it,” she scoffed with blunt honesty. “He has fallen for you.”
“Jake doesn’t have a choice,” I softly rebuked. “And he knows how I feel. He doesn’t own me, and if he fails to understand how this benefits Les Pétales in the long run, then perhaps we need to reconsider our relationship.”
With her wrinkled expression, she peered down at me. “I was brought here to get the school up and running, Miss Ford. After running Highlandale Hawthorne for twenty years, I have plenty of experience knowing what we need from our gala attendees, but I also understand what they expect. You are going to have to be willing to work harder than you ever have. You are going to have to be the bright shining star of a sex slave.”
“I will spend the next two months in the dungeon if that is what it takes,” I pleaded, unsure of why I made such an offer. I knew I would regret it the moment I said it. I had no real idea what I was signing up for or that this would be akin to an athlete training for a competition or a soldier training for battle.
I volunteered to be trained as a submissive.
“We have exactly eight weeks to prepare, Anna.”
“Yes, ma’am,” I replied. “I am ready, but I’m behind on my chores in the manor.”
She remarked, “No, I had Lele do them.”
Rolling down to my knees, I announced, “If you allow me the honor, I will not fail you.”
Her brow furrowed in disbelief as I was not the same girl running through the hallways.
“I cannot punish you for running after Jake if you're doing me this favor.”
I smiled. “I'm okay with that.”
“I'm not,” she joked, laughing. “I was looking forward to spanking your ass red with my ruler.”
“Oh, don't worry!” I assured, joking. “I’ll misbehave again soon enough.”
We found a happy place of coexistence, but a change was necessary if I wanted to succeed. And I wanted this. I needed to prove it to Wilma Manley. I needed to prove it to Jake Ballister. But most of all, I needed to prove it to myself.
I was worth more than being a whore for The Suits. Just because I enjoyed sex didn’t mean anyone had a right to take advantage of me. I could express myself and take flight with my sexual freedom.
Luca had been right all along. It was time for my Little Butterfly to soar.
And when I did, no man would ever crush my wings again.
* * *
At Manley’s instruction, I went to the main parlor. My fingers gripped tight to the cold wrought iron railing of the staircase which led down to the dungeon. I breathed deep, trying not to panic.
I could do this.
“Are you okay?” Sir Dane asked from the doorway.
“I’m supposed to go to the dungeon,” I answered, practically frantic. “Lele has been expelled.”
He twitched his jaw and glanced down before pursing his lips together with a nod. “Lele was expelled because she refused to do as she was told multiple times, but what does this have to do with you going to the dungeon?”
“I’m the new lead submissive,” I whispered, feeling a misplaced shame.
He reacted unexpectedly, moving his hand to my lower back. “Come.”
As Sir Dane escorted me down the staircase, I fretted with anxiety. The black lacquered door held no clues of what laid beyond, but it didn’t matter. The room was the size of two large bedrooms but empty.
“Thank you,” I politely said as he smirked. “I’m supposed to wait here.”
With his finger beneath his chin, he asked, “And wait for who?”
“Manley.”
“Ahh,” he said, nodding. “Getting serious.”
“I suppose you could say that,” I replied, kneeling in the middle of the room. The floor was cold and hard. “I have to be. I’ll be serving the gala party.”
His eyes zeroed in on me as he stepped forward and ran his hand through my hair. “You’re such a pretty girl. You should have been the lead sub from the beginning, Anna.”
Flicking my lashes up, I stared at his remarkably gorgeous face as my mouth gaped open and his finger caressed over it. He inserted his thumb between my lips, and I sucked on it. He retracted and brought it to his mouth as I confessed, “I appreciate you saying that because my stomach isn’t sure I belong here.”
“… Then why are you doing this?”
“To prove it to myself,” I muttered, clasping my hands in front of me.
His eyes scanned over me as I rocked, longing to conceal my breasts from his view. “If I unzipped my trousers and pulled out my cock, would you suck me?”
“Of course, I would,” I replied, without hesitation. “The question isn’t would I; the question is would you?”
His smile widened, lifting his cheeks, as he snickered, “You are a piece of work, Miss Ford. Questioning Doms…”
“If we’re going to play…” I was caught between the good girl getting nauseous on the floor and the bad girl who knew exactly what to do with a man like Sir Dane, but my fear prevented me from setting my submissive free. “Why don’t you try me?”
“You’re expecting Manley, or I’d already be in the back of your throat.”
“Perhaps another time,” I suggested with a grin.
Striding away, he said, “Soon, Anna. Very soon.”
In the dimly lit dungeon, I waited wondering what all these walls had seen. From behind me, a door opened. I wanted to look and see who it was, but I didn’t. I behaved and stayed composed—just as they would want.
I heard the crack of the whip firing a warning against the floor before brushing against my backside. The light strikes teased, turning me on, as I struggled not to turn around.
Bad Girl (Les Pétales) Page 10