Found by the Rivers

by liberty freer

  My mind turns with the idea of those two being close. I can totally fucking picture it. They’re perfect for each other. “You're too involved in my life.” I take a breath. “And because I didn't handle Ethan myself, he's running his mouth. This is too much. I'm better off on my own. Everyone knows I'm here now. David's going to come for me.” I can feel the anger leaving me and helplessness taking its place. It’s not a good feeling. I’ve always had a plan to stay a few steps ahead; now I’m not sure what to do.

  Kelsoe inches towards me. “David can’t get to you here.”

  I raise a brow. “Maybe not, but what if he brings others? Or the fucking cops?”

  Kelsoe’s nostrils flare. “We will handle it.”

  “Oh yeah? I figured you’d be on board with me dipping out.”

  “Things change.”

  My shoulders fall. He should be telling me to get the hell off his property. Can’t he see that I’m not worth the trouble?

  “Lenny, your birthday is right around the corner. I doubt any cop is going to give a shit if you’re running from home, but on the off chance, we’re in good with Al. If David calls the cops, Al will dick him around until your eighteen. If David or any others come here, we’ll handle them.”

  I bite my lip. Out of the two cops in town, Al has been working the longest. He’s pretty laid-back. I don’t doubt that he’ll prolong things. David can be one determined bastard though. I massage my temples, trying to ease the headache that’s forming. “You want to run my life?” I laugh, my eyes bouncing between them. “Fine. Go ahead.” I storm towards the house. They think they can do a better job? Let them try. This isn’t me giving up, I think, knowing it’s a lie.

  Kelsoe blocks my path. “Don’t you have something to say?” His eyes search mine, but I’m lost. After a few seconds, he sighs. “Do you want to say sorry?”

  “Sorry?”

  “For fucking overreacting and hitting Drew. You might have learned that hitting gets results, but trust me, they aren't gonna be the results you want. Not here.”

  I’ve been fighting my way for years. It started at school. As the outcast, I had to push back or risk the others running all over me. “Don’t lecture me about hitting. You hit Ethan.”

  “Ethan isn’t family. You don’t hit family.”

  I nod once. They aren’t my family, but maybe, I did take things too far. They should try harder not to piss me off. I glance over at Drew. He doesn’t look angry, more like concerned. I probably should apologize. I’m not sure if I’ve ever said sorry to anyone. My heart wants to say it, but I can’t get the words past my lips. I’m fucked up.

  “Shit happens,” Drew says. “I’m not mad, Lenny.”

  Fuck him for trying to make me feel better when he’s the one that got sucker punched. He’s trying to wiggle his way into my blood. For some crazy reason, he’s bound and determined to give me a better life or some shit. He’s going to be sorely disappointed.

  ≈≈≈

  I spend the next two days in my room. I would have stayed longer, but my stomach knows there’s food right around the corner. First stop is the shower. It’s weird having unlimited access to hot showers. Back home, I couldn’t take one unless rent was paid up. I usually spent what little money I had on food and used the river to bathe. Once finished in the shower, I throw on black shorts and a black shirt. I’m feeling dark today.

  Thankfully, the kitchen’s empty. I’m not ready to be around others right now, but if I’m being honest, I don’t want to face Drew or Kelsoe. I don’t want to face myself either, but unfortunately, that’s unavoidable. I fill a bowl with Fruit Loops and milk, then sit at the table. The house is quiet except for my loud ass chewing. Zack walks in as I’m finishing the last bite.

  “You’re out.”

  I smirk. “Yep. You miss me, Zachy?”

  Zack turns a deep red, and I laugh, ruffling the top of his blond hair on my way to the sink. “Just messing with ya.” I keep my back to him as I rinse the bowl. “Anything exciting happen?” I really want to ask if David’s been by.

  “Chris brought in a new bike. He’s working on it now.”

  “That’s cool. I guess I’ll go see if he needs any help.” And see if he has any weed. “See ya later, Zack.”

  I head outside and immediately hear Chris cursing up a storm. I laugh out loud as I make my way to the garage. The first person I see is Kelsoe. He’s wearing blue coveralls with a white ballcap placed backward; both are covered with grease and oil. He might be a jerk, but damn, he’s hot. The backward hat is really doing it for me.

  He looks up, and his eyes meet mine. My eyes widen as he smiles. It’s a real fucking smile and unless someone is behind me, he’s aiming it at me. That’s a first. He looks like a completely different person, and I find myself dumbstruck. He has the kind of smile that draws you in, making your stomach flutter, your palms sweat, and your knees weak.

  “Sup, Red,” Kelsoe says, throwing me off guard yet again.

  Normally, he scowls at me. I don’t think he’s ever greeted me. I run over the few encounters we’ve had in my head, and nope, never a greeting. He has to be up to something.

  Playing it cool, I lean against the door frame with my arms crossed. “How’s it going?”

  Chris laughs from his position on the floor. “I’m sure you can hear how it’s going.” He waves the wrench he’s holding at the bike. “I thought this piece of shit was salvageable.”

  Kelsoe chuckles. “She’s just going to be a little more work than we thought.”

  Chris snorts. “If you say so.” He moves his attention to me. “Lena, why don’t you chill with us for a bit. I can show you a couple things about fixing up bikes.” He smiles, white teeth a stark contrast to his dirt-covered face.

  “Yeah, sure. You guys got any weed? It’ll help me concentrate.” I smile.

  Kelsoe laughs. “Sure, it will, Red. We got a little bit.” He picks a joint up from the metal rack behind him. “Here, take a few hits. We’ll finish the rest after lunch.” He laughs again, and I wonder if he’s been taken over by aliens.

  I study his face as I take his offering. I think that’s the first time I’ve heard him laugh and damn if it isn’t sexy as hell. Deep and smooth, the vibration of it making me feel…feel like I want to hear him laugh again. I grab the lighter from my back pocket and light up. “Thanks.” I take a few hits. “So, you’re being nice to me now?”

  He shrugs, plucking the joint from my fingers and then stubbing it out. “I think it’s time for a truce. As long as you follow the rules, you can stay.”

  I cross my arms. “Bob already said I could stay.”

  He smirks. “I won’t make your life miserable, therefore, causing you to leave.”

  I laugh. “Giving up that easy?”

  “I don’t give up on anything.” He smiles. “Maybe I’ve just changed the objective.”

  “To what? What’s the goal now?” I ask, genuinely curious.

  He laughs. “Listen, as long as you follow the rules I don’t care if you stay or not.” He nods to Chris. “Let him show you the bike.”

  Chris holds the wrench out to me. “You can loosen these bolts here.” He points to an area near the back wheel.

  I take the wrench from him and kneel to get a good angle on the bolts as Chris begins explaining all the different parts, and what they think they need to fix to get it running. He keeps referring to the bike as she. I zone out, not understanding anything he’s talking about and not caring enough to try to. My brain is stuck on what Kelsoe said. He isn’t the type to back down. There must be something else going on.

  Kelsoe’s laughter pulls me out of my daze. “You’re boring her to death. Red, why don’t you go grab us some lunch. It’s getting close to that time, then we can finish the joint.”

  My eyes move to his. I quirk a brow. “Really? Because I’m a girl I can’t be interested in mechanics? I’m degraded to lunch lady?” I say, jokingly.

  Kelsoe gives me a flirty smirk. �
��What was the last thing Chris said?”

  “Something about a chain?” I say, but it sounds like a question. I glance at Chris who shakes his head. “A belt?”

  He shakes his head again, and I can tell he’s trying hard not to laugh.

  My shoulders shake as I hold back laughter. “Fine, I wasn't listening.”

  Kelsoe rolls his eyes playfully. “I told you. And you’re not getting lunch because you’re female. These bikes help pay the bills. You getting lunch means we have more time to work. You’re pitching in.” He pats my shoulder. “And we appreciate it, Red. We work as a team.”

  I shrug, trying to pretend his little speech isn’t affecting me the way it is. It coming from him makes it sink in even further. “All right. Fine. I’ll make your lunch.” I point my finger at Chris. “Don’t let Kelsoe light up without me. I’ll be right back.” This is temporary, I remind myself. Once David comes for me, I’m gone.

  Chapter 12

  I look in the fridge for lunch ideas. There’s plenty of sandwich meat, and that’s something I can make. Sold. After throwing the sandwiches together and putting them on a plate, I dig through the cabinets, grabbing anything that doesn’t require much prep.

  “Whatcha doing, Lena?” Zack asks from the kitchen table.

  “Making lunch for Kelsoe and Chris. Kelsoe’s being nice to me now. It’s weird.”

  “I heard him talking to Drew. I think Kelsoe’s done trying to get you to leave.” Zack smiles. “I’m glad. I like that you’re here.”

  His words make me warm. I give him a small smile. “I’m glad that Kelsoe might be backing off.” I give Zack my full attention. “I’m not staying permanently. Maybe a little longer than I was originally planning to, but it’s not long-term.” I need him to realize this. I hope Drew isn’t filling his head with false ideas.

  “I know, but I’m glad you’re here for now. Where you’re safe.”

  I wink. “I’m glad you’re here too. I’ll see you later, Kid.” I tuck a box of cereal under my arm, a jar of sweet pickles under the other, and a bag of bagels between my teeth. With the plate of sandwiches in my hand, I manage to carry it all out in one go.

  Kelsoe and Chris are rinsing off their hands and arms with the hose while Drew sits on the bike in the garage bragging about some chick he banged last night. His preppy ass looks out of place with his teal shorts, white shirt, and Sperry shoes.

  Kelsoe looks up and offers me another friendly smile. “Whatcha got there, Red?”

  I clear my throat as I set everything onto a glass table by the bike. I elbow Drew. “Didn’t know you’d be here. I didn’t make anything for you.” His face is red where I hit him. He notices me looking and tilts his head so that I can’t see that side anymore. “Sorry,” I say. “For hitting you.” I don’t tell him that if I were to go back, I don’t think I’d be able to not hit him. I know that I have anger issues, but I don’t know how to change it. I don’t think there is changing it.

  “No worries, Lenny.” He eyes the food I set down and laughs. “You brought a box of cereal?”

  I look over at Kelsoe and his expression makes me frown. “What? Something wrong?” I say with an edge to my voice.

  Kelsoe shakes his head. “Nope.”

  “It’s dry. We out of mayo?” Chris says around a mouthful of food. He eyes the sandwich in his hand. “And lettuce and tomato?”

  “I don’t keep inventory on what you guys have or don’t have. You wanted food. That’s food.”

  “Hey, Lena. It’s not a big deal. Why you so mad?” Chris frowns.

  “I’m not. I just… Eat your lunch without bitching. I’m going for a walk. I’ll see you guys later.” I spin around and head towards the woods. I pick up speed at the sound of crunching leaves behind me, but I’m not fast enough ’cause Drew’s at my side a few seconds later.

  “Hey, Lenny. What happened back there?”

  I tip my head back, staring up at the sky that’s mostly blocked by trees. There’s no point in walking any farther, it’ll mean that much more time with Drew when we walk back to the house.

  It feels like pressure is building up in my chest, so I let out a stream of air that has my cheeks puffing out. “I’m not cut out for this. I’m better off on my own. I just want to lay low until I turn eighteen. I’ll help clean up dishes and stuff. I can even pitch in a little money. I don’t play well with others. I need space. I like being alone.”

  Drew sighs. “I saw your face. You were fine when you first came out, and then Chris mentioned mayo and I brought up the cereal. Your whole demeanor changed.”

  I turn to look at him. “I’ve never used mayo on sandwiches. I don’t think my parents ever bought it. I’ve always just had them with meat and cheese. I didn’t know I was supposed to put other shit on them. I fucked ’em up.”

  “No biggie. You could have told us that,” Drew says.

  “It's not just that. I don’t know how to cook. I know nothing about cars. Hell, I’ve never even driven one. I’ve never owned a phone. I don’t work well with others. I look around here and compared to everyone else, I can’t do jack shit.” And you almost got yourself raped my mind reminds me. I let out a breath. I’m breathing hard and on the verge of crying. “Ah!” I scream. “And I’ve never been this emotional in my life.”

  “Don’t compare yourself to anyone else here. We’ve been working together since we were kids. We’ve had a lot of time to figure shit out. Nobody expects you to know everything.”

  I swallow the lump in my throat. I feel so exposed. I don’t like it. My first instinct is to run.

  Chris walks up. “Everything good?”

  “Lenny, listen to me. This is an adjustment. It will get easier. You’re used to life being a certain way, and now everything is changing. I get it.” He nods towards Chris. “Remember when you and Adam first got here?”

  Chris laughs and nods his head. “Yeah, Adam went on rampages for weeks, broke all kinds of shit. He was a fucking mess.”

  Drew laughs. “It was crazy for a while. Tyler’s transition was similar. Plus, he did a lot of drinking. You see Zack has his nose buried in a game twenty-four seven, rarely speaks to any of us.”

  “What you’re saying is, I’m adjusting better than everyone else?” I say, jokingly.

  Drew smiles. “What we’re saying is that you’re doing fine.”

  “Better than fine,” Chris adds.

  “Whatever. Liars.” I smile nudging Drew with my elbow.

  He wraps his arm around my shoulders and pulls me close. At first, I tense up. Being affectionate is not something I’m used it. Do I like it? I don’t get time to figure it out because his arm falls away. We walk back in silence. I feel like a nut case, but the guys seem to know just what to say to calm me down.

  When we get back to the house, I head straight for my room, lying back on my temporary bed to enjoy the solitude for a couple hours. My mind races, causing my muscles to become tense and sore, so I grab my bag and head to the bathroom.

  Getting out of the hot shower, I realize I have a problem; all my bras and underwear are dirty. I slip on some clothes; only two other shirts are clean. I guess it’s time for laundry. Drew and Zack are on the couch, each gripping a game controller as said game plays like a movie on the TV screen. It looks so realistic.

  “Hey, Drew. Where’s the washing machine and dryer?”

  “Laundry room is by the back porch.” He hops up. “I’ll show you.”

  “K. Let me grab my clothes.”

  I go back to my room and scoop up the pile of dirty clothes. Drew leads me to a small room that’s barely big enough to fit the white washer and dryer. I dump the clothes inside the washing machine and close the lid while eyeing the dials; there are way more than what I’m used to.

  Drew hits the power button and then points to the dial on the left. “Move the arrow to normal wash.” He points to a water level chart. “I’d say this is a medium load and set the water to hot. Hit start once everything is set.”
>
  As soon as I hit start, Drew yells, “Watch out!”

  I jump to the side, my eyes cutting to the back door. Nobody’s there and Drew laughs. My first reaction is to punch him in the face for scaring the shit outta me as a joke. The sound of the water grabs my attention, and before I can think, I'm lifting the lid and using my hand to fling water towards him. A handful of water hits him in the face. I try to hide my laughter behind my hand.

  Drew lowers his head and grins. “Oh, Lenny, you shouldn’t have done that.” He grabs me around the waist pinning my back to his chest.

  I can’t move even though I try. As I wiggle and laugh, Drew splashes water over me. He lets me go once I’m soaked. With water dripping down my face, I whirl around. “You better run.”

  I give him a half a second head start before I’m chasing him through the kitchen and out the front door. “You’re a dead man, Drew. Come back here.”

  He’s quick, almost to the garage, and I’m not even halfway there. Kelsoe, Ramsey, and Chris poke their heads out as I approach. Their open mouths and wide eyes cause me to stop. “What?”

  Drew saunters out of the garage, acting like he won a marathon when the garage is only thirty yards or so from the house. His smile is quick to disappear when his eyes land on me. His hand flies to his mouth, muffling his laughter and confusing me further.

  “Oh shit,” Drew chokes out.

  I rest my hand on my hip, getting aggravated now. “What?”

  While Drew’s having a hard time holding himself together, the other three look…Well, I can’t quite make out their expressions. I shiver as a gust of wind hits my soaked shirt, and that’s when I understand. I look down. My shirt is drenched in water and clinging to my bra-free boobs. It’s basically see-through. I stick my middle finger in the air before storming back to the house.