He was so hard and so powerful and so cold, and it was easy to assume that as a king he was somehow superhuman. He certainly looked it. Yet he wasn’t. He was just a man, just a human being as she was.
‘Is something wrong?’ she asked before she could think better of it.
Surprise flickered across his features and then was gone. ‘No. What makes you say that?’
‘You just look...tired.’
He said nothing for a moment, then abruptly turned and went over to his desk, putting the wine and the paper he’d been holding down on it. ‘It’s none of your concern. Is that all?’
His posture was very tense and she had the strangest impulse to go over to him and put a hand on his back, to ease the stiffness from him. It was very odd to feel such sympathy for him. Especially considering how arrogant and autocratic he was towards her.
Clasping her hands together instead, she said, ‘No, not quite all. I didn’t mean to take Ione without any guards at all. Perhaps just Hesta and one other. And the rest could—’
‘Why?’ he interrupted yet again, turning and pinning her in place with his cold blue stare. ‘What is this insistence on taking her out of the palace?’
Irritation prickled over her skin at his tone, but she tried to stay calm. ‘I thought she might like a change of scene.’ And then, with sudden inspiration, added, ‘She will be ruling this country at some point, so it might be interesting for her to see a bit more of the town at least, and the people who live there.’
He stared at her. ‘Why do you want to leave her guard detail behind?’
‘Because it’s difficult to have a normal outing to get ice cream and perhaps play at a playground when you have a whole troop of guards following you around.’
‘What do you mean, a normal outing?’
Anna took a breath. She would have to go carefully here. ‘Ione is very...restricted. She spends all her time at the palace with a lot of adults. I thought she might like to spend some time doing things an ordinary child might enjoy. Ice cream, for example. Playing with children her own age...’ Anna trailed off as the expression on the king’s face turned forbidding.
‘If you want ice cream, I’ll have it organised,’ he said flatly. ‘And there are plenty of places in the palace she can play. She doesn’t need to go to Itheus to do it.’
The prickle of irritation became more insistent. ‘So, you don’t let her go anywhere without her guards? Is that what you’re saying?’
‘She is the heir to the throne,’ his gaze was wintry, ‘as well as my daughter, and no, she doesn’t go anywhere without her guards.’
‘Like I’ve already said, I don’t mean to go without any guards at all. But perhaps only—’
‘No.’
The word was iron, with no room for argument, and it annoyed her. She understood that he wanted to look out for Ione’s safety, but such a restricted childhood could end up being smothering, and limiting, as she knew herself.
She wanted to argue, but that hadn’t ended well the night before and it probably wouldn’t end well tonight either, and so she bit back her protest. ‘Very well, Your Majesty,’ she said instead, trying not to let her annoyance colour her voice.
Silence fell, the look on his face impenetrable.
‘You’re very annoyed with me,’ he said, and it wasn’t a question.
‘No, of course I’m not—’
‘You are. Don’t deny it.’
Anna bit her lip. ‘Very well, I am.’
‘Yet you’re not arguing with me.’
‘Because you told me not to. Remember?’
Something leapt in his gaze, something hot beneath all that ice, and again she was conscious of him the way she’d been conscious of him the night before. Of how tall he was and how broad. How the fabric of his shirt pulled over the hard muscles of his chest and how the colour deepened the blue of his eyes. Of his warm, musky scent, filtered with a freshness that reminded her of sunlight and salt and the ocean, and which she found almost unbearably attractive.
He was so cold and hard and distant, and yet right now he seemed almost...touchable.
A shiver wound its way down her spine and it wasn’t fear or dread or foreboding or cold. It was much worse than that. It was excitement.
Slowly, the king leaned back against his desk, the tension that had been in his posture dissipating. He put the heels of his hands on the desktop, strong fingers gripping the edge, his intense stare unwavering.
‘I remember.’ His voice had lowered, become impossibly deeper. ‘Are you wanting that fight, little nun? Is that why you’re looking at me that way?’
Her cheeks were hot, a forbidden, wicked heat winding its way through her. ‘I’m not looking at you in any way,’ she said, her voice sounding distant even to her own ears.
He tilted his head, the glitter in his eyes no longer so icy. ‘Are you not? Because that blush in your cheeks would seem to say otherwise.’
Her eyes widened, her hands half rising as if to touch those pretty red cheeks of hers, before dropping back down to her sides. She was in that blue dress again and, since she’d also worn it the night before, it was probably because she didn’t have another. It was an issue. Mainly due to the fact that she looked so sweet and delectable in it.
She would look even sweeter and more delectable out of it.
His thoughts were very much out of line tonight and he should be reining them in. But right in this moment, he couldn’t bring himself to do it.
All day something had been eating away at him—a kind of impatience. He wasn’t sure where it had come from, since impatience was another thing he didn’t feel in the normal scheme of things, so he’d tried not to pay attention to it. But it had tugged at him, making it difficult to concentrate on his duties, which was a serious issue. Ruling his country required his full attention and he could not afford to be distracted.
It had got exponentially worse in the meeting he’d just had with his councillors. He hadn’t been able to focus and he’d felt tired, along with the unfamiliar need to get up and pace, to shake off the tension somehow. It was mystifying. He’d never been bored or uninterested at a meeting before, but he’d been both tonight, sitting there, irritated, wanting them gone so he could...
He hadn’t been sure what. Go down to the gym and do a few rounds with the punching bag. Do some lengths of the pool. Run on the treadmill. Do something hard and physical to get rid of whatever this feeling was the way he normally did.
Then his councillors had gone and she had come into the room, and it had all become very, very clear to him. His tiredness had dropped away and along with it the impatience, and he realised that she’d been the one he’d been waiting for the whole time. Waiting for evening to come, waiting to hear her report on his daughter. Waiting so he could match wits with her, waiting to get her all pink and furious and watch her eyes spark with silver fire.
It was disturbing. His entire life was crafted specifically to have no such needs. No such...attachments. No one whose company he looked forward to being in, no one he enjoyed talking with. He would allow himself nothing that would distract him from the duty he’d been born for—that of ruling a country. Axios came first and foremost, and always would. He’d betrayed it once before because he’d put someone else above it, and he wouldn’t willingly do so again.
One little novice nun should not have the power to distract him so badly.
Despite his determination not to, he’d been very angry about that, not helped by her insistence that she take Ione out of the palace, a suggestion he’d refused point blank. Ione could go nowhere without her entire guard detail because her safety was paramount, and most especially if it involved going down into the city. Ice cream and playgrounds were also indulgent and he didn’t like the thought of that either.
His refusal to even entertain the idea should have signalled the
end of the meeting and then he should have sent Anna away. But he hadn’t sent her away. Because she was standing there, all scarlet-cheeked and angry, that silver fire glittering in her eyes, making a very male satisfaction coil tightly inside him.
He wasn’t impatient or tense any longer. He wanted to push her further, make her even more furious, see what she’d do, and that was very, very wrong of him. The king should send her away and put her from his mind, but the man refused. The man wanted her to stay. The man hadn’t indulged himself in anything quite as sweet and innocent as she was, perhaps ever, and he wanted to hold on to this moment for as long as he possibly could.
Or hold on to her.
Yes, he did want to hold on to her. His hands itched to get rid of the cheap fabric of her dress and touch her silky skin, trace her softly rounded curves. Watch her eyes darken with desire, teach her exactly how good that beautiful body of hers could make her feel.
He gripped hard to the edge of the desk he leaned against. The man might want those things, but it was the king who remained in charge and it was the king who would continue to do so. He wouldn’t touch her, no matter how much his body demanded otherwise.
Flirting with her would be a test of his control, but perhaps his control could do with a test. It had been a long time since he’d felt the need to, after all.
‘I don’t know what you’re talking about,’ the little nun said, all flushed dignity and poise.
He almost smiled. ‘Then why are you blushing?’
Her mouth firmed. ‘If you’re talking about last night when you touched me, then of course I’m going to blush. You shouldn’t have done that.’
‘No,’ he agreed. ‘I shouldn’t. And maybe I should send you away before I do it again.’
Her eyes widened and she didn’t move. And for a moment the tension between them pulled tight, a humming vibration that set all his nerves alight.
It had been too long since he’d felt an attraction like this, far too long. And yes, he should send her away, but what harm would it do if he indulged himself for a moment or two? It was only physical chemistry, nothing more.
Good God, if he could send his own brother into exile for ten years without a break in his heartbeat, then he could withstand the temptation of one small nun.
Are you sure about that?
Of course he was sure. Once, he might have been drawn to her rebellious spirit, his innate protectiveness might have been touched by her innocence and vulnerability. But not now. He was protective still, but that didn’t focus on a person these days. It extended to an entire country.
It had taken more than his mother’s death to teach him that lesson—he’d been a recalcitrant student—but he’d learned in the end.
‘I don’t understand,’ she said, breaking the tense silence. She was standing very straight, her back flat, her chin lifted.
‘I think you do.’ He held her shocked gaze with his. ‘You might be innocent, but you’re not completely unworldly.’
The expression on her face shifted. ‘I see. Is this something to do with the Reverend Mother sending me to you for seduction?’
She said the words with no hint of a stutter, but her hands had clenched tightly at her sides. Was it fear? Had he frightened her? Then again, he knew what fear looked like; he saw it in the eyes of people who faced him every day, and there was nothing of fear in hers. Only the flickering, leaping silver flame of her temper.
‘She’s very interested in my emotional welfare,’ he said. ‘She thinks I should marry again and has been suggesting eligible women as potential wives to me for months. And then you arrive, all innocent and sweet and unsuspecting. I knew what she was doing even if you didn’t.’
She frowned. ‘I’m not innocent and I’m certainly not sweet, so could you please stop saying that I am?’
Physical desire shifted and turned inside him. He wanted to push himself away from his desk and go to her, stand very close and look down into her silvery eyes, watch them darken. To see what would happen if he put himself within reach. Would she touch him? Would she have the courage? Perhaps he should find out.
‘You’re both of those things, little nun. Because if you weren’t, you wouldn’t be blushing quite so hard right now.’
She stared at him and he could feel that humming tension between them ratchet higher. He shouldn’t be provoking her, yet he couldn’t bring himself to send her away.
Suddenly she moved, coming right up to stand in front of him, and even though he was leaning back against his desk, he still had to look down at her.
Her gaze was very level, but her cheeks were bright red, her hands in fists. ‘I’m not here to seduce you, Your Majesty,’ she said flatly, ‘whatever you or the Reverend Mother might think. So if that’s what you’re worried about, you needn’t be.’
She smelled of that sexy combination of lavender and musk, and he could see that the blush had crept down her neck, disappearing beneath the demure neckline of her dress. How far did it go? All the way over those pretty breasts?
He shouldn’t be curious. He shouldn’t want to know.
The pulse at the base of her throat was beating very fast and her breathing had quickened. Not fear, no. She wasn’t afraid, of that he was certain.
‘I’m not worried, believe me,’ he said, and then, because he couldn’t help it, he added, ‘But aren’t you curious? Aren’t you curious to see whether or not you could seduce me? How you, an innocent novice nun, could seduce a king?’
Her mouth opened, then shut again. Her knuckles were white as her hands clenched tighter, and he wasn’t sure whether it was because she was holding herself back or whether she was angered by his suggestion.
It was a mistake to have said that and he knew it, but he wanted to see what she would do, and besides, it had been a while since he’d indulged in flirtation.
You want her to do more than flirt. You want her to touch you.
The thought wound seductively through his head. He couldn’t deny that he did want that. But still, she was an innocent and under his protection, not to mention one of his own godmother’s novices. She was also employed by him. All very good reasons why he shouldn’t be encouraging her...
‘No,’ she said tightly. ‘I’m not interested.’
Except her gaze didn’t move from his, as if she was mesmerised.
‘Perhaps you’re not.’ Why was he so tense? Holding himself so still? It was almost as if he didn’t trust himself to move. ‘Or perhaps you’re just scared.’
‘I’m not scared either.’ She drew herself up even straighter. ‘And you should stop manipulating me.’
Of course she saw through him. She wasn’t stupid.
‘Am I manipulating you? Or are you letting me?’ He tightened his grip on the edge of the desk. ‘Maybe I should dismiss you, little nun. Put us both out of our misery.’
It would have been better for her if she’d nodded her head and said nothing. If she’d waited for him to dismiss her. But she didn’t. Instead, her gaze searched his. ‘What misery?’
‘The misery of wanting to touch a woman I shouldn’t.’ He regretted it as soon as the words left his mouth, because he never explained himself to anyone and he didn’t know why he was doing so now. Not that he planned on doing anything about it, but still.
Then again, it was too late to take it back now. She knew.
‘Oh.’ She blinked as if in shock, the light catching the soft gold of her lashes.
‘You’re surprised?’ His own heartbeat started to accelerate, a dark, intense hunger collecting inside him. ‘What about? I did tell you that you appealed to me.’
‘I know, but...’ She stopped, taking a ragged-sounding breath, staring hard at him. ‘No one has ever said things like that to me before.’
Of course they wouldn’t have. In a convent she would have been kept away from such concerns.<
br />
‘Does it shock you?’ He shifted, noting how she tracked the movement, like a prey animal watching a predator. Except this particular prey animal looked just as hungry as the predator himself.
The Reverend Mother would be appalled.
She would. But only if he did something about it, and he wasn’t going to. They were only talking and talking wouldn’t hurt. Neither would a bit of honesty. The king was still entirely in control.
‘No,’ she said slowly, as if she’d only just decided. ‘No, it doesn’t.’
‘It should. I’m not the right man for someone like you.’
If you really thought that, she wouldn’t still be standing here.
No, she definitely wouldn’t.
‘Someone like me,’ she echoed, her forehead creasing. ‘What does that mean?’
‘Isn’t it obvious? You’ve been brought up by nuns and you’re intending to take your vows. You’re inexperienced. Innocent. Sweet. Kind. And I am none of those things.’
She frowned. ‘Just because I’ve been living in a convent doesn’t mean I don’t know anything about...s-sex.’
The way she stumbled over the word went straight to his groin, making the hungry thing inside him growl. Making him want to cross the space between them, rip away that dress, and show her exactly what she didn’t know about sex.
Enough. Finish playing with her and send her away.
Yes, that was exactly what he should do. This had gone on long enough and, though his control was excellent, it was not limitless. It was time to call a halt before he did something he’d regret.
‘If you can’t even say the word without stuttering then you really don’t know,’ he said, pushing himself away from the desk and straightening. ‘It’s time to go, Sister Anna. I would leave now, while you can.’
The Most Powerful Of Kings (Mills & Boon Modern) (The Royal House of Axios, Book 2) Page 6