“We can’t skip practice,” I say when we hit the gravel at the bottom of the porch. “She’ll kill us.”
Nik speed walks down the street, not slowing until the boarding house is out of sight. “Don’t worry about Augustine,” he says. “Let her yell. What else can she do?”
If Augustine wants to punish us, she’ll find a way. There might be a secret dungeon in the cellar for all I know. “Where are we going?”
“You’ll see. It’s not far.” He reaches out nervously, looping his pinky around my index finger. “I may never have things in place before you need them to be and you deserve the truth before it’s too late.”
My blood runs cold at the seriousness of his voice. I’m not sure how much more I can take. “Why do I have a feeling I won’t like our conversation today?”
“You probably won’t, but you’re better off knowing.” He veers off the road and onto a dirt path. “It’s possible we’re trespassing.”
Lovely. More illegal activity.
Nik stops in front of a rundown shack with broken windows and overgrown shrubs. He steps gingerly over fallen bits of wood and disappears behind the building. There’s no way I’m following him back there.
“I think I’ll turn back,” I call.
Nik pops his head back into view. “You’re missing out.”
“I’ll take your word for it.”
“Come on,” he pleads. “Trust me.”
No.
But, against my better judgment, I do. If I’m smart, I’ll never trust anyone again, ever. I will, of course, but at least I recognize the fault in myself now. I wince and pick my way through tall grass, careful not to step on any of the old boards or rusty nails hidden beneath. Nik steps through a slit in a rotting wooden fence. I follow.
On the other side, I stop mid-step. Bright pink climbing flowers cover the backside of the fence and tiny white petals dot the grass. A cluster of sunflowers grow near the back of the small enclosure and, from this side, it looks as if ivy is holding the shed up.
“What is this place?” I ask.
Nik shrugs and pulls a blanket from the basket. “I found it one day when I was looking for a bit of privacy.”
The rest of the world is gone here, blocked out by nature. It’s a little piece of home in a foreign country. I wish he’d shown me this before, but I can’t blame him for wanting to keep it to himself. We barely knew each other—we still don’t—but since the first time we practiced our song, I’ve felt connected to him. Somehow, he seems to understand in a way no one else does. Maybe it’s because we both want something we can’t find here but whatever the reason, I don’t want to let it go until I have to.
He kneels on the blanket and reaches into the basket again. “Don’t expect anything extravagant.”
I sit beside him and kick off my shoes. The dew soaks slightly through the blanket beneath me. Tucking my feet underneath my legs, I peek inside the basket: a couple hunks of bread, two apples, and a small cheese wedge. My heart aches. “I ate this at home almost every day.”
“Was your mother a good cook?” he asks.
“No.” I laugh, remembering how awful her hachee is. Although, I’ve never had anyone else’s stew—maybe it’s supposed to taste like that. “But mostly, it’s what we could afford.”
He hands me a piece of the bread. “We survived an entire month on bean paste and cabbage once. Two months later, my mother begged my uncle to loan her the money to send me here.”
For a chance at a better life, he told me. Being so wrapped up in my own problems, I forgot. “Have you heard from your mother lately?”
He shakes his head. “I don’t really expect to. Not after—” He stops. “After I failed so miserably before even stepping foot on American soil.”
“Failed?” I lower my brows.
“I guess we’re going to get right down to it, huh?” He scratches the back of his head and looks away. “This isn’t easy to talk about, but it’s important you understand what you’re dealing with here.”
I lean back on my hands to watch him. A haunted expression spreads across his face, and I grip the blanket to stop myself from reaching out. “Okay,” I say quietly. “My curiosity is piqued.”
He jerks up straight, tossing his apple back into the basket. “I’d really rather not tell you this part—”
“You don’t have to,” I interrupt.
“I do,” he says slowly. “I hope it doesn’t change your opinion of me. Assuming you have a good one, that is.” He gives me a wisp of a smile. “You did just catch me running booze.”
“And then you made me walk home alone in the middle of the night.” I don’t mean it, but a flicker of regret passes over his expression. “I’m joking. Your past won’t change anything.” Unless it turns out he’s also a kidnapping psychopath.
He grimaces. “When the ship my sister and I came here on docked, police came on board. One of the first-class passengers had their jewelry stolen. I don’t know who did it, but the woman pointed her finger at me. I was seen running down the corridor at the time of the burglary, which was true, but only because I was lost and didn’t want to get caught on the wrong floor. I was hauled off to prison and convicted.”
“Without any evidence?” I ask a bit too loudly.
“It was their word against mine. There was no adult to keep me in line, I was fourteen and barely spoke English at the time. I did two years for it.”
“That’s terrible. Couldn’t you amplify their compassion to help?”
“I can only amplify an emotion that’s already there, and all they felt was anger toward me.”
I can hardly judge him for something he didn’t do, but the courts did… So many people turning a blind eye to my kidnapping makes more sense now. “I’m sorry.”
He shrugs it off. “My sister, Flori, came to see me once. She wanted me to know she was continuing on to our friends in North Carolina and would wait for me there.”
“Then why are you still here?”
“I had to earn enough money to get there first so I took a job at a factory.” He picks one of the tiny white flowers and tosses it into the grass.
I wait for him to continue but he’s quiet, plucking flower after flower. “What happened?”
Finally, he draws a steady breath. “About a month into the job my coworker, Charlie, asked if I’d drive him to the bank. His knee was acting up so it was hard to drive himself, he said, and he needed to withdraw some cash. Obviously, I assumed he meant from his account, but he robbed them. When he came running back to the car screaming for me to go, I thought someone else was in there with a gun so I did. It didn’t take long for me to realize what he’d done and that I was an accomplice. With my prior record, I couldn’t exactly explain it to the police. They don’t like people like me to begin with and would never believe I’m innocent. I think Charlie knew about the time I served and that’s why he asked me, thinking I would be okay with it.” He pauses again. “Anyway, I got out of the car and ran as fast as I could before I could take the rap.”
I look down at my lap. If I didn’t know him, it would be hard to believe he knew nothing of his coworker’s plan, but he has more character than that. He might not mind breaking the prohibition laws, but I would never peg him for a thief.
“I’m so sorry, Nik.” I reach for his hand. There are small calluses there I never noticed before, but they’re not so rough they grate against my skin. “Why don’t you go find Flori now? I’m sure she misses you.”
“I stopped writing her last year. I was too embarrassed that I let myself get in the same situation a second time.” He squeezes my fingers. “I should’ve known better than to trust Charlie. He wasn’t exactly a standup guy.”
I inch closer to him and stretch my legs out so they’re parallel to his. “That’s ridiculous. How could you have known?”
He goes quiet again, tracing the checkered pattern of the blanket. A black and white chickadee lands on the fence near the sunflowers and wiggles hi
s tail. It must be nice to be so free. To take off into the great big sky and go anywhere. If I had wings, I’d never be still. I’d see the world but it would be of my own choosing, and I’d always go home in the end. I’m sure Nik would too.
“Nik?” I ask, breaking the comfortable silence. He makes a low noise. It feels wrong to ask—his admission being so huge—but there has to be more he hasn’t told me. “Is that what you wanted to tell me?”
“No.” He sighs. “Charlie was shot a few days later by the police but they never found the money. He must’ve hidden it somewhere or given it to someone to hold. I have no idea.”
“Oh…”
“And, now that I’ve got you wondering where this is going.” He gives me a small smile. “Chamberlain saw me getting out of the car that day.”
I gasp. “And he didn’t turn you in?”
“He wants the money, and he doesn’t believe I don’t know where it is. If I hadn’t agreed to work for Augustine, he would’ve had me thrown back in prison.”
“What does Augustine have to do with it? And what does he want the money for? He’s a coal baron.”
Nik’s soft laugh holds no humor. “No matter how rich he is, he’ll want more. That’s who he is—never satisfied. He forced me to take a job with the troupe so he could keep an eye on me. It was pure coincidence that I had magic—the plan was to keep me away from the others so I never found out. Like that’s possible.” He snorts. “Anyway, he expects me to lead him to the cash one day. If I try to run, he assumes it will be for the money.”
“I’m going to meet every existing lunatic before I get home, aren’t I?” I shake my head. “Does Augustine know he’s blackmailing you?”
“She doesn’t care what Chamberlain does as long as he keeps giving her financial support.” His finger loops beneath my chin and turns my face toward him. “Augustine uses people to get what she wants. She preys on the less fortunate and people with something they wish to hide. If she knows your secret, you’re trapped. Jackie and Theresa, me... you. Everyone in the troupe has a reason to stay. Besides magic, that is. Hiding in the open, in a show, might be the only safe place to use some of our gifts.”
Reality slams down on my head like an anvil. I knew Augustine wasn’t helping me out of pure compassion, but I didn’t expect her to be so calculating. I should have. She threw me at Chamberlain to keep him happy while I drew in a crowd for her show, and I’ve yet to see a single red cent. She has me in the palm of her hand with no intention of letting go.
“Oh, God.” I lean forward and try not to give into the spinning sensation. “I’m never getting out of here, am I?”
Nik swivels, resting his hands on my arm. “You need to leave before she knows you’re onto her. The troupe goes to Chicago in less than two weeks. If she thinks you’re suspicious of her or that you plan on leaving, she’ll do everything in her power to keep you.”
“I am leaving,” I blurt. “Tomorrow. I’ve got a bag full of food and a change of clothes already packed in my room. I stole a scarf and a pair of sunglasses from the theater to disguise myself. All I need is to find the ticket office, and I’ll be on the next ship home.”
“And money?” he asks. “You have money?”
I cringe. “I’m going to ask Augustine for my wages tonight.”
“Do you still trust me?” he asks, his voice raw.
My stomach twists into a tight knot, squeezing. I’m going to be sick right here in the grass. “Of course I do.”
“Then don’t ask Augustine for anything.” He leans back and tips his head up toward the sun. “Because I have a plan too.”
“A plan?” A throbbing starts behind my eyes. Don’t cry, Lina. There’s a plan. “For what?”
“Getting us both out of here. Why do you think I risked those late-night runs? It pays well.” He cracks his knuckles one at a time. “First, I have to get rid of my tail, but after that it shouldn’t be too hard—”
“Your what?”
“They have me followed—”
“Someone’s been following you?” My breath catches, my pulse banging in my ears. I spin around to face the shed. “Now? Are they here now?”
“No, no.” He touches my cheek, guiding my face back toward him. “Everyone thinks we’re at rehearsal, remember? It’s safe.”
Pressure pulsates behind my forehead. All those times I thought I saw a shadow, heard footsteps, or felt someone watching me, they could all be true. I’m not crazy. I cover my ears with my hands. How many times have I been in danger and pretended it was all in my head? From the first day, someone’s always been there. I fight the black spots dancing in my vision and let his eyes ground me.
“Sorry. I just...”
“Don’t apologize.”
A sob worms its way to my chest. The last thing I want is to breakdown now. I’m still saving my big moment for after this nightmare is behind me. “I didn’t want to give up on Christian, but everything just seemed so impossible for us. I had a weak moment when I left him, but I never thought he would abandon me like this.”
“He’s an idiot.”
“How can he just leave me here?” I blurt, hot tears finally spilling over. “Even if he never loved me, even if he’s engaged to someone else, how can he just leave me here?”
Nik winces. “I wish I had an answer for you.”
It’s not hard to understand, actually. So many people saw it coming. Now he doesn’t have to be the bad guy for breaking things off. My kidnapping gave him an easy way out, and he’ll even gain some sympathy. Who wouldn’t want to comfort a heartbroken heir? Cornelia wasted no time at all tying herself to him. All he has to do is pretend I never wrote or called and he’s free.
“Don’t let him drag you down,” Nik says quietly. “Keep being strong. You’re a survivor, Lina Holt. You’ll have the opportunity to give him a slap, I promise.”
I’ll give him more than a slap. I sniffle. Christian isn’t worth another one of my thoughts. “Did you really risk going to prison again with the bootlegging to get us out of here?”
He pauses. “I’ve watched Augustine take advantage of a lot of people, but I can’t let her do it to you.” He scrubs his hands on his pants. “Wait until the next show. Augustine will give me what I’m owed after that, and we can leave together.”
Another show. I’m not sure I can wait that long, not with everything I know.
“You might have to wait days for a ship to leave,” he adds. “With my wages, I can help you get the ticket and find lodgings if you need them before I get on a train to North Carolina.”
“Why?” I ask before I can think better of it. “Why do so much for me?”
He opens his mouth but he says nothing as his gaze drops to the blanket. Then, “Call it atonement for not helping you when I should have.” His lips quirk. “Besides, you’ve grown on me.”
Goosebumps prickle my skin. If Nik can go through everything he did and still be strong, so can I. “Okay. One more show.”
Nik lets out a breath and lies down on the blanket. “Let’s eat.”
I laugh, feeling almost giddy at the thought of escape, and pass him an apple from the basket. “So, where did you get the scar on your eyebrow?”
“You noticed it?” His finger traces the small line. “When I was ten, Flori thought it would be funny to shave my eyebrows while I was asleep.”
“Oh no.”
He smirks. “Well, in her defense, I did cut one of her pigtails off with a pair of shears.”
“Your poor parents.”
“I’ll say.” He chuckles. “This one—”
Nik pushes up on his elbows and I freeze. His face is so close I can see each fleck in his light green eyes. The air thins in the few inches between us, drawing me closer. He glances at my lips and just as I’m sure he’s about to kiss me, he draws a sharp breath. A flush creeps up my neck, but I can’t tell if it’s relief or disappointment coiling inside me.
“We should get back,” he blurts, hopping to his f
eet.
However awful the truth, knowing Nik had my back allowed me to sleep soundly for the first night in forever. All thoughts of Christian, of home, seem to have vanished from my mind, and I ease onto the floor of the practice room. I will get back to Holland, but to do that, I have to focus. Zero in on the right-here-right-now.
Chester crawls into my lap, and I scratch behind his ear. His nails dig through my skirt while he gets comfortable. I don’t mind—the affection is nice after dealing with Theresa’s death stare all day. When his head rests on my arm, his breath hot against the crook of my elbow, I want to hug him tight. Maybe I can talk my mother into getting a dog. Something big that can protect me.
I lean my head against the wall and run my fingers across Chester’s wiry fur. Before long, his head tilts and he goes limp against me. The smallest snore rises from him, and I grin.
“Hey,” Will shouts. He rushes through the doorway, huffing as if he just finished running a race. “Something happened.”
Props clatter to the floor as the troupe crowds around him, pummeling him with questions. I lift Chester from my lap and strain to hear Will speak over the voices when the room erupts with cheers and shrieks, bouncing and hugging.
“Did you hear that?” James grabs Etta, swinging her around, and laughs. “We did it,” he yells. “We did it.”
Nik slips inside, skirting around the excitement and stands beside me with a solemn face. “This is bad.”
“Why? Everyone seems happy. What’s going on?”
“We booked the Orpheum.” He crosses his arms and studies everyone celebrating. “Chamberlain got someone to watch the show last week.”
I lick my lips. “That’s good for them, isn’t it?”
“For them, yes.” He gives me a pointed look. “The troupe leaves for Chicago a week early. The next show at The Den will be our last. We won’t have time to leave after the performance.”
“I can’t go to Chicago,” I whisper. “My deal with Augustine was to stay on in New York.”
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