“Not just over there. We have to move it over this way, too,” Babe went on, undeterred. “We got to sort of spread it down and back so’s the creek there will cut back over here. See?”
“Yeah, someone get me a spoon and I’ll start right here,” Denny said, picking up a handful of dirt and tossing it downstream.
“Look at the way them trees is just laying half in and half out of the water. We can lift or pull ’em out.”
“Impossible!” Denny grumbled.
“Criminy, I moved that one just this morning.” She glanced slyly over to Denny. “When I was taking my swim. Easy as pie!”
“Well, easy for you. Not me!” Lotty said.
“You can set atopt Egypt and she’ll know just what to do. Denny, you can drive a team. Ol’ Ajax’s got some pull left in him.”
“That wind-broke crow bait? Ha!” Denny said.
“And I reckon that friend of yours will want to help. What’s his name? Frank?”
Denny narrowed his eyes on Babe. “Hank.”
“Bet he don’t got nothing else better to do ’cept”—she dangled the camera part—“go on nature hikes.”
Denny’s face drained its color. “Well, maybe. He might have some spare time.” Babe figured she had him just where she wanted him.
“What’s that you have there, Babe?” Lotty asked.
“Something I found acrost the creek,” she said, putting it back in her pocket. “Keeping it as a juju.”
“Okay, we’ll help. But I’m telling you, Babe, it’s hopeless,” Denny said. Remember, we have our regular chores to do.” He turned to Lotty. “I know! Let’s you and me drive into town. We’ll go find Hank. He’s a swell guy. Lots of fun.”
“No, I think I’ll just stay here. See if I can talk some sense into Babe.”
“Lotty, alls we need is a good working plan,” Babe said.
“Lord, Babe, when you get the bit between your teeth . . . ,” she said, kicking a dirt clod.
“And nobody plans better’n you, Lotty,” Babe said. “’Member? You’re the brains of the outfit. I’m the brawn?”
“Okay. You two geniuses figure it all out,” Denny said, jogging back up the trail. “I got to go help Pa split cordwood.”
“Come on, Lotty, let’s you and me go get Egypt and see what she thinks about this here creek.”
“Babe!” Lotty screamed. “Jupiter’s cage door! He’s gone!”
“Let him go last night,” Babe answered, pulling Egypt’s head harness down off a hook.
“You what?”
“Opened his cage, opened that barn door, and watched him stroll hisself on out.”
“But . . .”
“Lotty, he was dying in here. I’m going to haul his cage outside so’s if he wants to come back, he can.”
“But how can he survive out there? Babe, he’ll starve!”
Babe tossed Lotty’s handler’s rod to her. “He was starving in here!” Her words echoed through the barn. “Now come on. You get Egypt and let’s get her harnessed.”
“What do you think she’s thinking?” Babe asked Lotty after they’d put the elephant in her harness.
“She’s going to take one look at that landslide and go running away screaming like everyone else has!”
“Look at her eyes. She’s thinking she’s earning her keep.”
“She’s thinking she’s running out of hay. Well, let’s go show her that creek.”
They had barely started the path down when Egypt’s ears started to flap and she took in big gulps of air. The closer to the water, the livelier Egypt stepped.
“Now what’s she thinking?” Babe asked as Egypt dashed headlong into the creek. She took a long pull of water, shot it into her mouth, then dropped to her knees, went on her side, and rolled joyously, sending wavelets onto the shore.
“She’s thinking she’s a baby again,” Lotty said. “We might as well sit down and enjoy the show.”
Egypt waded in deeper and sucked up enough water to give her back a shower. Then she pulled up globs of sand and tossed them on her back.
Finally, Egypt came up on the bank, sandy and muddy, flapping her ears to dry herself, and started to browse on the shoreline brush.
“You there! You! Get out of here!”
Across the creek a man, short and squat, stood shaking a large stick.
“Uh-oh,” Lotty said. “Bet that’s the prospector Miss V warned us about. That Luckett man. We better go.”
Babe stood up and stepped closer.
“Babe, no!”
Babe waded into the water. “We ain’t doing you no harm!”
“What’s that beast doing in my creek?” he demanded.
“Taking a bath, and this ain’t all your creek.” Babe stood her ground midstream.
“Who the hell are you?”
“Your new neighbor.”
“And that thing? An elephant? Here?”
“Also your new neighbor.”
“What’s that crazy midget woman doing now, starting up a circus?” he yelled.
As Babe approached, he took a few steps back. She used her full size to her full advantage.
“First midgets, then elephants, and now giants,” he said, shaking his head. “What next?”
“A trained bear and a chimpanzee.”
“All up there at that lady midget’s place?”
“Yep, only she’s a dwarf, not a midget.”
“Dwarf, midget, homunculus. She’s small and a woman and the last thing she needs is running another lumber mill circus. Now git! You’re trespassing!” He raised his stick in warning. Babe knew she could easily snap it in half.
“You that Luckett gold miner?”
“That’s the name. Now, git!”
Babe could tell up close, by his scrappy voice and gray hair springing out from under his hat, he was maybe fifty or older. His whole body listed on bowed legs, like Euclid.
“I’ll go back,” she said. “But if you don’t like looking at the likes of us, then take you someplace else. We’re working Miss V’s side of the creek.”
His face went stone hard. “Working what?”
“Going to move us a mountain.” She ticked her head toward the landslide.
He set his head back and laughed. “And they say I’m the one missing some buttons!” He limped away, laughing to himself, and using his stick as a cane.
44
“Oh, no, you’re not,” Sarah said, tapping the date on the kitchen calendar. “It’s August first. Donation Day. Everything is packed and ready on the front porch.”
“But we want to start down at the creek,” Lotty said. “I have plans drawn up and everything!”
“Chores first. It’s beyond me why Miss V said you kids could mess with that stupid creek in the first place. All the work needing done here.”
Babe tried not to laugh, but it seemed like Sarah could glare at two kids on each side of her at once.
“Anyway, Denny has to deliver food and supplies to the county charity home today,” she said. “Chores first!”
“But Pa has both wagons and the teams up at the mill,” Denny said. “How can—”
“You’ll have to go by shank’s mare and use the handcart.”
“On foot? Haul all that by myself?” Denny protested.
“So you better get started,” his mother said, taking her bonnet off the hook. “It might even take you two loads. Babe, can you help Denny load the handcart? I have to get lunch to the mill.” She tapped Denny’s arm. “On foot, and you don’t see me complaining!”
“Just for the record,” Babe said, adding the last package of Donation Day food to the handcart, “bringing Egypt ain’t my idea.”
“It’s okay, Babe,” Denny said. “This’ll be fun!”
Babe walked next to Egypt and gave a side glance toward Lotty riding atop the elephant with Denny snuggled up right behind her, his long legs dangling down past Egypt’s curious and fanning ears.
“Egypt don’t look too happy a
bout this, neither.” Babe petted Egypt’s trunk. “She thinks she’s a parade spectacle again.”
“Maybe Babe’s right, Denny,” Lotty said. “Maybe we should leave her . . .”
“Hey, you’re the one always spouting how well trained Egypt is,” Denny said. “But, if you’re afraid . . .”
“No, I’m not afraid. And Egypt always does what I say,” Lotty said.
“What you think your folks and Miss V would have to say about this?” Babe asked, glancing back at the house.
“They’re all at the mill,” Denny said. “We’ll be back in two hours. It’s just down the road. You don’t have to come, you know.”
“Oh? Then who’d be hauling this handcart? Should I round up Honeycomb?”
“No!” Lotty shouted. “Oh come on, Babe!”
Babe weighed the situation. Go with them, go work on the creek, go back to bed? She did favor a trip to town, see the sights, the sights Denny had already pointed out to Lotty.
“Okay, but for the record . . .”
“We know!” Denny and Lotty said in unison.
“Hey, all those old geezers at the home’ll be thrilled to see an elephant. Heck, half of them are old circus folks. They’ll get a real kick out of it! And Donation Day is for doing good deeds!” he justified with giving Lotty a squeeze. He put his arm into the air. “Onward!” Lotty tapped Egypt’s foreleg and they started out.
Babe picked up the handcart handles and started pulling. The load of smoked hams, fruits, canned goods, and jams wasn’t heavy, but she hauled it with long, hesitant steps, mumbling, “For the record.”
Denny pointed the way through a winding road, flanked by farms and orchards. “See? Isn’t all trees around here. Around that bend is a great view! Wait till you see it down in the valley. Lots of fruit trees and farming. That’s where the future is, they say. In fact, that’s . . .”
“Stop right where you are!” A man stood in the middle of the road, pointing a rifle straight at Egypt.
Babe held Egypt’s trunk. “Whoa, girl.”
“Stop, Egypt!” Lotty commanded. “Denny. Who’s that?”
“Uh-oh . . .” Denny started. “That’s crazy old Preacher-Man Munley.”
“He a real man of God?” Babe asked. “Toting him a rifle?”
“I mean it! Not a step closer!” the man yelled, his rifle still aimed high. His black pastor’s frock was threadbare and his beard was long and scraggly.
“Hey there, Mr. Munley. It’s just me. Denny Franklin.”
“Don’t care who you are. That elephant is the devil’s work!”
“Don’t say anything,” Denny warned Babe as she moved forward.
Babe ignored him. “Devil’s work?”
“And you! Devil’s spawn! Like all them devil’s imps at the county home! Like that woman up there on that hill! Devil’s handmaid!”
“Lotty, just turn this elephant around,” Denny said, keeping his voice low and calm. “Babe, come back here. Don’t rile him.”
“We aren’t any devil’s handmaids!” Lotty shouted.
“We’re leaving,” Denny called out.
“Heard about that beast! Devil’s work! Folks pay good, hard-earned cash money to see such a thing! So git and don’t you never come back this way!” the man continued, coming even closer.
“Babe, come back,” Lotty pleaded. “Please! Why do you always have to . . . ?”
Babe stopped. “Got vittles here. You want vittles? Maybe feed the poor?” Babe stepped aside and showed him the handcart.
The shot rang out, Egypt issued a horrible screech, stumbled, dumping both Lotty and Denny. Babe didn’t know whether to go after the running preacher-man, see to her friends, or run after Egypt.
Before finding her way back to Miss V’s, Egypt had mowed through several rows of crops, stampeded a herd of terrorized sheep, crashed through three fences, and overturned a field worker’s outhouse.
“It’s just a graze,” Cleve said, inspecting the bloodied streak along Egypt’s side. He dabbed it with alcohol on a rag and threw the rag down. “Damn lucky!”
“What were you kids thinking?” Sarah demanded. Babe, Lotty, and Denny stood, dirty and sweaty, in the barn.
“You know that elephant wasn’t to go off this property!” Miss V screeched. “I’ve already gotten three phone calls from neighbors! The sheriff is on his way out here! Do you know how much your little prank is going to cost me?”
“Didn’t think about that,” Lotty said, following her aunt as she paced the barn. “Honest, Miss V, we just did it thinking your old carnie friends, you know, the ones we were taking the food to, would get a kick out of . . .”
“That’s another thing! Where’s all the food I sent you with?” Miss V said.
The kids exchanged glances. “Um, I reckon that preacher-man’s got it,” Babe finally said. She’d never been chewed out by adults she admired, and this first time was humiliating to her and she knew her face showed it.
“That’s another thing!” Sarah bellowed. “You should have never gone even close to Preacher-Man Munley! Everyone knows he belongs in the bughouse! What were you doing way over there?”
“Showing them the sights,” Denny answered, looking down. “And besides, who knew that old coot would show up out of nowhere? He’s the one who . . .” He trailed off.
“Want me to go back? See about that cart and the food?” Babe asked.
“No!” all three adults shouted in unison.
“Denny! Back to the house,” Sarah said, leading the way.
“Carlotta, go get cleaned up,” Miss V ordered, following.
That left Babe looking at Cleve. “Babe,” he said kindly. “I think I know whose idea this was.”
“I didn’t say nothing.”
“Still, I think I know. Egypt best stay in the barn tonight.”
“I’ll tend her,” Babe said, running her hand down the elephant’s trunk.
He turned to leave, then said, “You’re a good kid, Babe.”
“Can you wait here a minute?” Babe went into her room and returned with the envelope of cash, all that was left of their stash. “Will this help? It’s over two hundred dollar.”
Cleve smiled, looking down at Babe’s offering. She placed it in his hand. “Well, I’d be lying if I said all the damage isn’t going to hurt us in a big way.”
He smiled and left. Babe turned to Egypt, now swaying calmly in the safety of the barn. “Sorry, girl. I’m real sorry. Should have stood my ground. Should have.”
45
It was as though everyone around the table at lunch knew the hard rap rap rap on the door meant more trouble.
“I recognize that knock,” Miss V said. “Sarah, would you let the sheriff in?”
Lotty looked at Babe, who looked at Denny, who looked down at his lunch, still untouched.
“Sorry to interrupt,” the sheriff said. His uniform was nothing more than a dingy gray shirt and black pants, a lopsided necktie and a badge. His slouch hat was in his hands. He nodded to everyone around the table, eyes landing on Babe, sitting head and shoulders above the rest. “Miss V,” he said, trying to smile. “Here. What I told you about on the phone.”
Miss V smiled and tapped the tablecloth. “Set it here, Arlo. Have you had your lunch? Sarah, see to an extra plate, will you?”
“No, no. This is far from a social call. Here’s the damage estimates,” he said, placing several scraps of paper on the table.
“Is there a total?”
“Somewhere in the two hundreds,” he said. “You’ll have to settle with each person. I think I convinced everyone not to sue. But Miss V, that elephant has to go.”
“Go? Why? What for?” Lotty said.
“Lotty, I will handle this,” Miss V said sternly. “Our elephant is tame as a kitten. That Munley shot her! What would you expect an elephant to do? I’d sue that lunatic if I thought he had a dime to his name!”
The sheriff pulled another paper out of his shirt pocket. “Well, another
concerned citizen sent this in shortly after word got out about that elephant being here. I didn’t think much of it at the time.”
He placed the newspaper on the table. The headline screamed all the way from Pendleton.
MAD ELEPHANT NEARLY KILLS LOCAL BOY
Miss V’s face grew pale. She lowered her glasses and passed the paper to Lotty. “Is this true?”
Lotty scanned the headline with the accompanying photo of Egypt from the carnie flier. “No! I told you about that! That kid nearly killed Egypt!”
“Now, Arlo,” Cleve said, standing up. “I’m sure we can come to some sort of arrangement here. How about we— I know! We’ll just keep the elephant chained and promise no escapes.”
“Yes!” Miss V said. “We have plenty of room and can easily keep her here. And the children have promised under threat of death never to take her anywhere off this property.”
Arlo scratched his chin. “You know what an animal lover I am. But I have a job to do.”
Babe wasn’t sure when or where or how to jump into the conversation. She sat silent, keeping her beast quiet with deep, steady breaths. But it was too much. “What if that gunshot killed Egypt? Would you be hauling that preacher-man to jail?”
Silence all around the table. “You do have a point, miss,” Arlo said. “Look, let me see what I can do. The county vet is out of town, and he’d be the one to decide this.”
“I’ll sign whatever I have to. I’ll pay these debts, and I’ll . . . I’ll even . . .” Miss V began, then, out of breath, sat back.
“She needs to rest,” Sarah said. “This has been all too much.”
“Of course,” Arlo said, backing away. “Sorry to interrupt. Just doing my job. Look, I’ll do what I can to stall all this business. But for God’s sake, everyone, keep that elephant under control. I can see myself out.”
The room was deathly quiet. Babe and Lotty looked at each other. “We have money,” Lotty said. “Not a lot, but Babe and me have money.”
“I can’t take your money,” Miss V said.
“Yes, you can,” Cleve said. He stood up and pulled out all the cash Babe had given him. “In fact, you already have.”
Professor Renoir's Collection of Oddities, Curiosities, and Delights Page 21