by Dawn Brower
“So you can leave me stranded as you run off with him?” Kaitlin grumbled under her breath. “You’ll owe me for this.”
“Don’t worry, dear,” Samantha replied as she dragged Kaitlin with her. “I’ll find you a dance partner too. Isn’t that Lord Asthey talking to Lord Darcy?” Her heart thundered in her chest. While she hadn’t really wanted to see Lord Darcy, she did want to see Lord Asthey. He was so handsome. Both Lord Darcy and Lord Asthey were blond, had gorgeous blue eyes, and amazing physiques. Judging them by looks alone wasn’t enough though. Only one of them made her heart race and filled her with excitement. The problem of course was he didn’t notice her as anything more than his friend’s little sister.
Kaitlin sighed and let Samantha lead her to the two earls. “I don’t need to dance.” She shook her head vigorously. “I can find a book to read and sit in the corner.”
Samantha stopped and stared at her friend. “You will do no such thing.” How could Kaitlin not want to dance? “Do you not like Lord Asthey?” That seemed even worse somehow. Samantha adored him. She wanted him for herself, but gave up on that notion a while ago. If she couldn’t get pleasure from dancing with him perhaps her friend could. Not that she wanted Lord Asthey to fall in love with Kaitlin, but he seemed to like her. Samantha wasn’t so selfish as to not wish her friend happiness. Even if it felt as if she were being stabbed in the heart every time Lord Asthey smiled fondly at Kaitlin… She shook that pain away and pasted a smile on her face.
“Lord Asthey is likeable enough,” Kaitlin said in a good-natured tone. “But I don’t like dancing.” She wrinkled her nose in disgust.
“Nonsense,” Samantha said and waved her hand. “You just haven’t found the right partner yet.”
She narrowed her gaze. Was that her brother lounging in the corner? Samantha blew out a breath. She’d have to be careful. If Gregory, Lord Shelby, her overprotective brother thought she was getting too attached to the Earl of Darcy he might act rashly. In her brother’s mind no one was good enough for her. Especially one of the wicked earls, as they dubbed themselves. Unfortunately, Lord Asthey was also in that particular group. Shelby adored his friends. He just didn’t want any of his friends to pay any attention to his little sister.
Kaitlin placed her hand on Samantha’s arm. “I really do not wish to dance.”
What was she supposed to do? Kaitlin would be more comfortable hiding in a corner. She had to help her friend break out of her shell in some way. If she insisted on gluing herself to a wall she’d never find love. Kaitlin deserved to find someone that would adore her. Samantha wanted to help guide her there. If she couldn’t have the one man she loved, then at least Kaitlin would. “One dance,” Samantha said. “After that we can leave the ballroom if you wish.”
Kaitlin’s shoulders drooped. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath. “Fine,” she said. “I’ll dance one but after that I don’t want you to pressure me into anything else I don’t wish to do. I’ll have your word on it.” She glared at Samantha.
“I promise,” Samantha said earnestly and crossed her finger over her heart. “You may rely upon it.”
She looped her arm through Kaitlin’s and led her the rest of the way to Lord Darcy and Lord Asthey. They were deep in conversation when they arrived next to them.
“I guess we are co-captains at this year’s cricket match,” Darcy said. “We have more options for teammates here. What should we ask for as our prize when we win?”
“A little arrogant of you to count our winnings before they’re earned, isn’t it?” Asthey lifted a brow. “Shelby is damn good at the game. I should know.”
They both stopped talking when they arrived. “We’re not interrupting are we?” Samantha batted her eyelashes at them. She was well aware of their yearly cricket match. Whenever she could she’d sneak out to watch some of their private matches. Not all of them took place at country parties. One thing stayed true throughout the years. They all played and the four of them divided up differently each year. That was how they kept things between them fair.
Kaitlin had a far away expression on her face. Her friend was probably daydreaming about something she wouldn’t share. Samantha doubted she had heard anything the two earls had been discussing. Sometimes Kaitlin lived in a world of her own. Samantha wished she could lose herself in her own mind every now and then. She had too many plans to live in a make-believe world. Samantha glanced at her friend then at the two earls. “Are you going to dance this evening?” Perhaps a little blunt but Samantha wasn’t known for her shy and demure demeanor. Her brother often called her a hellion. She wouldn’t apologize for who she was for any reason.
“I…” Asthey stumbled over the words.
“Why of course,” Darcy said smoothly. He bowed. “Would you care to dace Lady Samantha?”
Why couldn’t Asthey have asked her to dance? He had started to speak first. Would he have actually asked if Darcy hadn’t interrupted him? Somehow she doubted it. “That would be lovely,” she answered him. She managed to keep a bright smile on her face even though she didn’t feel anything resembling excitement. She held out her hand to him and he led her to the floor. At least it wasn’t a waltz. She didn’t want to dance such an intimate set with Lord Darcy.
Asthey bowed to Kaitlin and said something to her. She shook her head vigorously. Did her friend just decline to dance with him? Samantha seethed inwardly. Kaitlin had the one thing Samantha coveted before her and she had said no. That was…wrong. She turned to Darcy as he led her through the dance. They didn’t talk much and for that she was thankful. Asthey and Kaitlin strolled around the room. Samantha was green with jealousy but she tamped it down.
“Are you enjoying the ball?” Lord Darcy asked.
“Of course,” she answered smoothly. “Are you?”
“Yes,” he said. “It’s been quite entertaining.”
This had to be the most mundane conversation she’d ever had. Through it all she kept the smile on her face. She also kept track of every step Lord Asthey and Kaitlin took. They seemed to be having an animated conversation. Whatever Lord Asthey was saying Kaitlin found riveting. She wished she could hear it. Hell, Samantha just wished she could hold Lord Asthey’s attention as long as Kaitlin seemed to be holding it.
Would he court her? Dance with her? Love her? Would Samantha wake one day to find an engagement announcement in the Times? Her heart broke at the thought. How was she to survive in a world where one of her best friends married the man she loved? What was wrong with her? She had to let him go. He clearly didn’t see her the same way. She turned her attention to Darcy. He at least looked at her as an attractive female. He might not love her, but he appreciated her.
The dance came to an end and Lord Darcy led her to the edge of the dance floor. He bowed and said, “Thank you for the dance.”
“It was my pleasure, Lord Darcy.” Where were Kaitlin and Asthey? She had lost track of them at the end of the dance.
“If you’ll excuse me I see Lord Harrington. There is something I must discuss with him.”
Samantha wasn’t a fool. He would want to discuss their upcoming cricket match. She might try to eavesdrop later. Samantha didn’t want to miss the pertinent details. She wanted to be able to watch and secretly cheer for Lord Asthey, but she could gather that information later. It was far more important to locate Kaitlin and Lord Asthey. She curtsied. “Until next time.”
His lips twitched. “I look forward to it.” With those words he left her alone and headed toward Lord Harrington.
At that moment she caught a glimpse of Kaitlin out of the corner of her eye. She was alone. Where had Asthey gone? Samantha scanned the room feverishly. He’d disappeared. She lost her chance at securing a dance with him. The strands of a waltz filled the room. She turned to leave the ballroom before anyone noticed the crestfallen expression on her face. She ran right into a male. He had a hard muscular chest that most women might find appealing. Samantha glanced up and met Lord Asthey’s gaze.
“You can make it up to me by dancing with me.” She smiled softly, silently begging him. “Please.” It was the waltz. She wanted to feel his arms around her. So she could pretend for a few brief moments he loved her.
“I…” He swallowed hard. “Of course.” Lord Asthey held out his hand to her and led her to the floor.
Samantha felt as if she were floating on clouds. Lord Asthey was a marvelous dancer and led her expertly around the floor. This was a dream. One she had every night but until now hadn’t experienced in reality. Of course it wasn’t exactly as she had dreamed it. In her fantasies he confessed his love and asked her to marry him. A lady couldn’t have everything could she?
She would remember this dance for the rest of her life. It probably would be the only dance she had with him. If this were all she would have she’d cherish it. When she was old and alone she could look back on it with fondness. If she were brave enough she’d confess her feelings. Even hellions had trouble spilling all their secrets though. Some confessions wouldn’t unburden the soul. It was best she kept her deepest desires to herself. She wouldn’t want to scare Lord Asthey away. It would break her heart even more if she never saw him again.
The dance came to an end and he led her off the floor. They hadn’t said a word throughout the entire dance. That was all right with her. It was enough to have had this one dance. She smiled at him hoping he could see how much she cared. He didn’t. He bowed and made his excuses. It was over before it ever had a chance to begin. Lord Asthey left her alone and went toward his friends. Samantha’s smile wobbled a little. She had to leave before the world became privy to her anguish. Without saying a word she turned on her heels and exited the ballroom. Kaitlin could take care of herself. Marian was still there after all… Samantha barely contained her tears until she reached her chambers. Once there she let go and cried all her pain out.
When she had no more tears to shed she sat up and wiped her face. There. That was done. Now she could move on and find a man who would love her. Lord Asthey didn’t know what he was missing.
If only she could make herself believe that…
Excerpt: Chance of Love
Scandal Meets Love 6
Prologue
April 1816
Spring had always been her favorite season. Lady Lenora St. Martin didn’t have much else to look forward to and the very idea of new beginnings appealed to her. Every spring new life sprouted and the barren landscape was filled with beauty and wonder. That also applied to the London ballrooms. New debutantes were launched in society and the latest crop of true English beauties was put on display for those gentlemen in search of a wife.
Lenora had never been considered a beauty…
She’d accepted her lot in life a long time ago. She had dark brown hair and hazel eyes, both boring. Her attributes along with her shyness kept her position as a wallflower secure. No one noticed her and most of the time that was all right with her. A crowded ballroom tended to bring out her worst anxieties. Her cousin Bennett, the Marquess of Holton, insisted she attend social gatherings. Lenora understood his reasons even if she didn’t particularly agree with them. Bennett hoped she’d find a suitor, fall in love, and then marry so she could have a family of her own. All of those things sounded wonderful. None of them were likely to happen. At least not with her…
This ball, the one most debutantes and their mothers clamored to attend, was a good example. The young misses were all flirting with their gentlemen suitors and their mothers gossiped with other matrons. The wallflowers did what they did best—hugged the walls. Lenora; on the other hand, did none of that. She didn’t merely stand by the wall hoping some wayward gentleman would discover her and lead her to the dance floor. That would have been too simple and probably preferred by her cousin. No, Lenora didn’t do anything by normal standards. She hated to be noticed and would have loved to have remained at home reading one of her favorite novels. So she attempted to make the best of a terrible situation and hid in the darkest most obscure corner she could find.
Spring might mean new beginnings, but it also meant new social gatherings. It led to her greatest discomfort and she dreaded it. If she’d been left alone to walk in the gardens or bask in the warmth of sunlight streaming through her bedroom window she’d have been gloriously happy. Instead she was forced into ballrooms and hiding in corners.
“What’s a lovely woman such as yourself doing in this dark corner?” His voice was as warm as honey on a hot summer day. It’s tempting sweetness washed over her and made her crave a taste…of something. He was also the biggest rake in all of London. Julian Everleigh, the Duke of Ashley was a notorious seducer. “Come dance with me little mouse.”
Lenora wrinkled her nose at his endearment for her. She adored Julian, but she knew better than to accept anything he offered. He visited her cousin often enough she should be unaffected by his flirtations. They thrilled her though and she wanted to savor them whenever he deigned to speak to her. “No thank you,” she said softly. “I’m all right, promise.”
He chuckled lightly and then tilted his lips upward into the most sinful smile she’d ever witnessed. Not that she’d seen many… Most gentlemen failed to notice her let alone smile purposely in her direction. “You shouldn’t promise something that isn’t true little one,” he said. “I don’t ever bother with a promise because I know myself too well. I’ll break them the first chance presented to me.” Julian winked at her and it sent flutters through her stomach she’d never felt before in her entire life. “Instead I’ll ensure you will never forget dancing with me. I’m quite good at it.” He held out his hand. “Now please, do me the honor of spending a few moments with me. I’m in desperate need of protection from unwanted advances.” He leaned down just enough so that she could feel his warm breath when he spoke. “Are you willing to be my savior?”
In that moment she’d have promised him anything, but she held back. He said promises were nothing to him. The duke openly admitted to breaking them often. The vow she was about to make would be empty words to him. So instead she smiled, even if it was a little wobbly. Dancing in front of everyone terrified her. “I can try…”
“That’s all anyone can ask,” he told her.
Why did he have to be so gorgeous? He was too handsome and way too pretty to be paying any attention to her. His golden blond hair rivaled the sun in brilliance and his blue eyes were more dazzling than the most exquisite sapphire. She could easily become lost in his charming veneer if she allowed herself to be. “I supp..suppose,” she stuttered over the word. Lenora cleared her throat and began again. “I suppose that is true.”
“So?” He lifted a brow. “Will you join me for the next set?”
She nodded as the strands of a waltz filled the room. Lenora almost groaned when she realized what she’d agreed to. The waltz was the most intimate dances and she’d never danced one with a male other than her cousin. Heck, she’d never danced at all with a male besides her cousin… That didn’t detract from her dilemma. A waltz with the duke would cause a stir and she’d be so close to him… Her hand shook as she placed it in his. “Lead the way, Your Grace.”
He led her to the floor and then he twirled her into the dance before she had time to change her mind, and she’d been close to doing so. The closer she’d stepped toward the light and the prying gazes of the ton she’d become increasingly more anxious. He’d been wise to take the decision away from her.
Julian was an amazing dancer, but that shouldn’t have surprised her. Everything about him or that he did seemed to be perfect. “Now,” he began. “This doesn’t seem so bad does it, little one?”
At least he hadn’t called her a mouse again�
�� “No,” she agreed. It was actually quite exhilarating. Lenora felt as if she was floating on air.
“I’ve always considered dancing to be too decadent to be done properly in a public forum,” he began. “At least the sort I prefer.”
She pushed her eyebrows together. “I’m not sure I follow…”
“I wouldn’t expect you would,” he replied secretively. “One day you might understand. Perhaps you’ll tell me when you do.” The corner of his lip turned upward almost…arrogantly. As if only he really understood the secrets of the world…
“I suspect, Your Grace, that our paths won’t cross much in the coming years.” The duke might be one of her cousin’s friends, but she fully expected, at some juncture, to live on her own. Once she reached her majoring in a few months she planned to travel. Maybe to Italy… She hadn’t fully decided yet. “We don’t keep the same company and in time the little connections we have will dissipate.”
“Perhaps,” he agreed. “Time will tell I suppose.” He twirled her around the floor expertly.
Lenora wouldn’t ever forget this moment. She would unlikely never dance again, at least not like this. She was grateful she’d allowed the duke to convince her to participate. Afterward she’d likely find her way to her favorite corner to hide. In her darkest moments she’d be able to travel back to this waltz and recall it, and Julian fondly. If she believed she had a chance of something more with him… She shook that thought away. Loving him was a terrible idea and perhaps the only thing she regretted. This was a kindness, while out of character for him, but she shouldn’t expect anything else from him.
The strands of the waltz ended and disappointment filled her. She’d tried to brush his request off at the start and now she never wanted the dance to end. The duke twirled her one last time around the floor and then led her to where their dance had begun. He bowed and kissed her gloved hand. “Thank you for your benevolence, my lady.” His blue eyes twinkled with mischief. “And for being my protector when I need it.”