by Carrie Elks
“I’ve been thinking about Saturday night a lot,” she admitted, looking at him through her thick eyelashes. “And I’m so sorry I lost it while you were with me. I’m so embarrassed.”
“Don’t apologize to me for that,” he said. “Didn’t you tell me last night that we can support each other at different times? Maybe Saturday night was my night.”
She gave him a wan smile. “Well I appreciate it, but I can’t help but wish that you didn’t have to see me like that. You must have thought I was crazy.”
“I was worried about you. I’d never seen you like that. You looked broken.”
“I wasn’t broken,” she said, her eyes catching his. “I was shocked, I think. Real shock. The kind that freezes you and means you can’t form a coherent thought.”
He nodded. “I know exactly what you mean. I’ve been there, too.”
“With the baby?”
“Yeah. The next time I went out to a call after the baby died I froze completely. That’s when Chief Simons told me to take some leave.”
She pulled her gaze away from his, looking almost ashamed. He wanted to reach out, tip her face up, and make her look at him again. He missed the warm depths of her eyes. “There was something I should have told you back then,” she said, her voice soft. “You confided in me and I should have confided in you, too.” Finally she looked at him, and he could see the clouds behind her stare. “It’s weird, because my shock was about a baby, too.” She took a deep breath, as if to steel herself. “Just before Will left, I realized I’d missed two periods. I took a pregnancy test and it was positive.”
“You were pregnant?” he asked her, his mouth dropping open. He hadn’t expected that at all.
“As it turned out I wasn’t. I was one of those one in a million who got a false positive. But for a little while I thought I was, and I told Will about it. Turns out he didn’t want to have a baby with me. In fact, he didn’t want to be with me at all. I was getting all excited about bringing a new life into the world, and he was silently working out how he could get out of being a dad.” She smiled sadly. “A week later I saw the doctor, he took another test, and that came up negative. There were no signs I’d ever been pregnant at all.” She ran a finger along her bottom lip, deep in her own thoughts.
“So he left you because you had a false positive?” Lucas wanted to strangle Will Martin all over again. It was only the fact that they were out in public that Lucas stopped from saying exactly what he thought about the man.
“That’s what I thought. He left because I wanted a family and he didn’t. But then on Saturday it turned out everything I thought was wrong. He did want a baby, just not with me.”
“I wish you’d told me about this before,” he told her, his heart aching at her sadness. “I would have understood.”
“I know that now. But I was confused about us, about where we were going. I was afraid of showing you who I really am, scars and all.” She looked down at her plate. “You may have noticed that I’m not great at talking about personal things.”
He put his silverware down and reached across the table for her hand. He held it gently in his. “Don’t ever be afraid of being truthful.” There was another question in his head, one that wouldn’t disappear no matter how much he willed it to. “And while we’re talking about the truth, can I ask you one more thing?”
She nodded at him to go ahead.
“Are you still in love with him?”
“With Will?” she asked, sounding horrified. “No, not at all.” She rushed on, as if she wanted to reassure him. “I haven’t been in love with him for a long time. And I certainly wouldn’t have gotten involved with you if I still felt something for another man.” This time her smile had no sadness to it. “I’m a one-man kind of woman.”
“I’m glad to hear it,” Lucas replied, the heaviness in his heart dissolving away. “Because I’m a one-woman kind of guy, and the woman I want is you.”
She blinked, then her smile widened. “Is that right?”
“Yeah. If you’ll have me.” He was hoping she would, hoping that the way she’d taken care of him last night was a result of the fact she cared about him. “I’m not much of a catch,” he told her, wanting to be as truthful as he could. “There will be more weeks like this one, more fires like the one at Santa Maria. Sometimes I’ll come home so tired I won’t be able to string two words together.” His eyes softened. “But if I can only say one word, it will be your name. Because you’re all I can think about.”
Her eyes became glassy. “That might be the most romantic thing I ever heard.”
He was sick of having the table in between them. He needed her closer, much closer. Enough to feel her body, to wrap his arms around her. Close enough that he could press his lips to hers and kiss her until they were both out of breath.
So he did exactly that. Within a moment she was in his arms, cupping her hands around his neck. She kissed him the way he was kissing her, as though neither of them wanted to stop.
When they finally parted – forced by a need for oxygen – she was smiling as broadly as he was, her eyes bright and her cheeks plump. He loved that expression on her face – loved the face itself. And in his heart he knew that he’d tell her just how much he loved her, sooner, rather than later.
Ember pulled her car up in the school parking lot, pulling the keys out of the ignition, and passing them to Lucas. Until they went and picked his car up after school, hers was the only vehicle he had. “It feels weird coming in at this time,” she said. The fact was, she didn’t want to go in at all. She wanted to take him home, curl back up with him in her bed, and fall asleep in his arms the way they had last night.
After everything that had happened, she wasn’t sure she could stand to be apart from him again.
“I bet it does,” he agreed. “But at least you only have a few hours until you can come home again, and I’ll be waiting here for you.”
And wasn’t that an amazing thing? The knowledge that he’d be here waiting was what she needed to get through the day.
Realistically they’d both have to get used to waiting a lot. Between his shifts and her office hours there would be times where they’d be apart a lot, but those times alone would be filled with the knowledge that they’d be together again soon. Ember was pretty sure she could cope with that.
“I could get used to you picking me up,” she said, grinning at him. “Are you sure you don’t want to jack in the whole firefighting thing and become my personal chauffeur?”
He raised an eyebrow. “Be your kept man?” he said, a wicked grin spreading out across his lips. “Yeah, I think I could stand for that.”
Except he wouldn’t. She knew that, because she knew him. He was as independent as Ember, as dedicated to his profession as she was, too. That’s why they fit together so perfectly. Leaning across the car, she pressed a light kiss to his cheek. “I’ll see you after work, Lieutenant.”
“That you will. Have a good afternoon, Miss Kennedy.” He tipped his head to the left and captured her lips with his. “Don’t work too hard, I have a few plans for this evening.”
“You do?”
“Yeah, I do. I figure it’s my turn to take care of you.”
She liked the sound of that, liked the knowledge that he’d be waiting for her. It made her chest feel full, and sent her thoughts spinning. She leaned in for one final kiss, pressing her lips to his cheek. “I love you,” she whispered, then pulled away and opened the car door, fully intending to jump out of the car and leave him with those final words.
But before she could leave he grabbed her hand. She turned to look at him, taking in his serious expression as he stared back into her eyes. “I love you too,” he told her, the sincerity in his voice clear. “So much.”
Was it possible for her smile to get any bigger? She wasn’t sure it could. As she left the car and walked over to the school building, the knowledge of his love filled her up.
She couldn’t wait for this evening
. Couldn’t wait for the rest of their lives to begin. As individuals they were strong – they’d both proved that – but together they were indestructible.
No matter how many mistakes they’d made, this flame between them couldn’t be extinguished. It kept growing and growing, and thank goodness for that.
She was happy to let it burn.
Epilogue
“Am I late?” Ember’s mom asked as she walked across the beach, her shoes sinking into the soft sand. “I couldn’t find anywhere to park, it’s busy out here. You’d think it was the middle of summer, not September.”
Ember looked up from the tables she’d been setting. Ally had let her borrow them from the café for the afternoon, letting her set up all the food and drink, ready for people to arrive. “Nope, you’re right on time. Here, take a seat.” She pointed at one of the beach chairs she’d laid out. It was supposed to be a small party, but it had kept growing and growing until she’d lost count of all the people who were coming. It felt good to know she and Lucas had so many people that cared about them. She was delighted that so many of them wanted to share his birthday celebrations with her.
“Do you think he suspects?” her mom asked, putting her bag onto the sand beside the chair, then slumping down.
“Not a thing,” Ember said, shaking her head. “He finished work this morning then headed straight to bed. I’m going to call him in a while and tell him to meet me here for an early evening swim.” She licked her lips, tasting the salt that was clinging to them. “Hopefully he won’t be too shocked.”
“I can’t believe you’ve managed to keep it a secret,” Ally said, slumping down on the chair next to Ember’s mom. She’d just closed up the café for the evening – an early finish so she could celebrate with the rest of them. “Especially in a town like this. I swear half the people know more about me than I do, the jungle drums are powerful here.”
Ember gave her a soft smile, wondering if Ally was referring to all the gossip going around about the café. According to those in the know, it was on the verge of closing for good, thanks to all the money it was losing.
“Well I’m glad we’ve managed to keep it under wraps,” Ember said. “After all the hard work everybody’s put in.”
“We’re here,” Nicholas called from across the beach, tugging at Brooke’s hand as they approached Ember’s group. “Is Lucas here yet?”
Ember smiled at his excited face. Lucas had completely won Nicholas over – and she was so happy he had. Whenever the two of them spent time together it made her heart melt in the best way possible. “Nope, not yet. I’m going to call him in a minute. As soon as everybody is here.”
“What if he decides to stay in bed?” Ally asked, her eyes sparkling. “Maybe he’s expecting to celebrate with only you.”
“If he doesn’t come, I’ll drag him over myself,” Ember said, looking around at all the food she and Ally had made. “And anyway, when has he ever turned down a trip to the beach?”
Over the next fifteen minutes, the guests flowed in, and Ember and her friends handed drinks out to them as they sat down on the chairs or the blankets that covered the golden sands, all of them saying what a beautiful evening she’d chosen to have the celebration on.
They were right, it really was beautiful. It was the last Saturday in September, and though summer was over, the warm temperatures remained. It was still balmy enough that nobody needed to wear a sweater or a jacket in spite of the light breeze coming in from the ocean. And though most of the tourists had left Angel Sands – heading home to school and jobs and everything else that paid the bills – the beach and boardwalk were still attracting the locals, who were making the most of this warm weekend.
“Hey, Ember.” Lucas’ friends Griff and Jackson came over to where Ember and her friends were standing. “Where’s the birthday boy?” They each leaned in to give her a hug, and she squeezed them right back. In the months since the Santa Maria Wildfire, since she and Lucas had become an item, she’d gotten to know his friends well. Griff always made her smile with his antics, and made Nicholas’ eyes bulge out with his descriptions of the whales he saw while out on the boat. Jackson, though quieter, was also funny as hell. He was also crazily attractive to other women, she’d noticed, as they all stared at him from across the beach.
“I’m calling him now,” she told them, grabbing her phone and dialing his number. She could see Lucas’ parents – Deenie and Wallace – walking over to where they were gathered. She waved at them then pointed at the phone, letting them know she was calling him. “I’m gonna duck around the back of the café so he can’t hear everybody talking, I don’t want him to suspect a thing.”
She’d only just made it when Lucas picked up the call. “Hey,” he said, his voice holding just a hint of sleep. “Where are you? I woke up and you were gone.”
“I came down to help Ally close up the café,” she told him, keeping her fingers crossed behind her back as if that would make up for her white lie. “It’s so lovely out tonight. I want to go and swim. Are you awake enough to meet me here?”
She wasn’t sure what she was going to do if he said no. But luckily, as she’d predicted, he never could miss an excuse to spend time at the beach.
“Sure. Give me twenty minutes and I’ll meet you there. You still at the café?”
“Yep, I’ll meet you on the beach.”
“And then we’ll come back home and really start the birthday celebrations,” he said, his voice lowering. “I plan on unwrapping you and kissing every single freckle on your body until you beg me not to stop.”
Her face warmed at the thought of it. She was almost regretting that she’d organized this party, but then she remembered why she had – that she’d wanted a party do-over. To make up for that terrible night at the Martin’s house, when she’d embarrassed the hell out of both of them.
“Sounds good,” she said softly. “But we may have to delay things a bit. Ally was talking about us all going out for dinner.”
“I can deal with that,” Lucas replied. “As long as I get to unwrap my gift before midnight.” He gave a little chuckle. “And by gift, I mean you, in case you didn’t realize.”
She loved how easy going he was – and marveled at how different he’d seemed that first time she’d met him. Life had loosened them both up in the best way, or maybe they’d loosened each other up. Either way, she loved the way they worked when they were together.
“It’s a deal,” she told him, before saying goodbye and ending the call.
Yes, she hoped he enjoyed his surprise party. But right now midnight couldn’t come soon enough.
It was busy at the beach considering it was past five and outside of tourist season. Luckily for Lucas – birthday luck, he called it – a family was leaving as he pulled in and he managed to take their parking spot in the lot behind the boardwalk.
He climbed out of his car and let the warm evening air surround him. He was wearing his board shorts and a t-shirt, carrying a towel to dry himself off with after their swim. It felt good to travel light – both physically and emotionally. He couldn’t help but think that Ember had a lot to do with his levity.
As he passed the closed up café, he could hear the sound of talking and shouting coming from the beach behind. Strange how many people had the same idea as Ember and were making the most of the weekend warmth. When they’d come swimming a few Saturdays ago it hadn’t been this busy.
He strode onto the sand, his eyes widening as he saw a huge bunch of people standing in front of him. It took him a moment to realize he recognized them all – his friends, his family, his workmates. Even some people from the Angel Day committee. What were they all doing here at the same time? It felt like too big of a coinciden—
“Surprise!” Everybody was shouting and looking at him. Then Ember walked forward, reaching out her arm and taking her hand in his. “Happy birthday, Lucas,” she said, her grin widening. “Oh, and um, I hope you like your party.”
“This
is for me?” He blinked at her, still not quite understanding.
“Of course,” she said, laughing. “Happy birthday, darling.” She wrapped her arms around him, and he held her tight, trying to take everything in. Over her shoulder he could see his parents waving at him. Next to them Griff and Jackson were laughing at his confusion. Beyond them he could see Mitch Lakin and some others from the Angel Sands Fire Department, along with Chief Simons and his crew from White City.
Everybody was here for him, and it made his heart feel as full as his arms were with Ember. “I can’t believe it,” he whispered, pressing his lips to her hair. “I didn’t suspect a thing.”
“Not even when you woke up and I wasn’t there?” She looked up at him, her face shining brightly. She was so beautiful, he couldn’t help but brush his lips against hers.
“Nope, not even then.”
She stepped back and grabbed his hand, pulling him over to greet all of their guests. As he hugged his mom, somebody turned on the music, a low beat coming from the speakers.
“Happy birthday, son,” Deenie whispered in his ear. “Enjoy your party, you deserve it.”
For the next few minutes he was surrounded by people, all of them wanting to congratulate him. He hugged and high-fived old friends and new colleagues, still smiling at how well Ember had managed to surprise him. Every few moments his gaze pulled over to where she was standing with Ally and Brooke. He found himself admiring how beautiful she looked in her white summer dress. The one he was still intending to peel away from her when they were alone in the apartment.
How the hell did he get this lucky? It was something he asked himself every day.
“She’s a catch, man,” Griff said, as if he could read Lucas’ mind. “Did you know she called every guest here to personally invite them? Didn’t want to write out the invitations in case you saw them around.”
“She did?” A smile played around Lucas’ lips. That’s exactly the kind of thing she would do. It made his chest feel full to think about all the effort she’d gone to for today. Not just the guests and the food, but the emotional energy she must have put into organizing this.