by Aliana James
“Shit. Okay, maybe I was. But that wasn’t the worst of it. He was upset, Kane, something happened today. Something bad and I knew it and I didn’t push to find out what. Instead, I went after him for not making time for me. He’s trying to keep up, asking me to wait. He had a headache—”
“He gets really bad migraines, doesn’t he?” Kane interrupted.
“He hasn’t had one in a while.”
“Okay, he has a headache, which for Travis is probably the equivalent of someone dropping a brick on your head and you’re what, yelling at him?” Kane continued.
Travis’s face, twisted in pain, flashed in his mind and he cringed.
“God, what the fuck is wrong with me? Why would I do that to him?”
“What else did you do?”
“I told him that he was free to get a divorce,” he answered, his voice small and quiet.
“Why? You wanted this marriage and did anything you could to convince him to say yes. Correct me if I’m wrong, but it was working, right?” Kane asked.
“What was working?” he asked. He couldn’t think anymore.
“The marriage, Alec. Keep up with me. You were buying him cute little gifts, and he was cooking you dinner, and I’m assuming you guys took my advice and slept together since you’re both a lot less stressed.”
He nodded because he didn’t trust his voice.
“And you go and tell him to divorce you? You’ve had a crush on him for how long?”
Years. But he wasn’t about to admit it.
“He was at Peter’s this afternoon, Kane. He left the office and didn’t tell anyone where he was going so he could sneak over to Peter’s,” he said.
“Okay, so? You have to know he wouldn’t sleep with Peter. You said he was upset. Is Peter okay?”
“I don’t know. I didn’t get a chance to ask. I saw red when he admitted that’s where he was, and the conversation tanked from there.” He downed the rest of his beer and closed his eyes in disgust. “I told him I loved him. Somewhere in the shouting, I said that.”
“What did he say?”
Oh God, what had Travis said? Had he even heard him?
“Nothing. I kept talking over him. He was holding his head, asking for me to wait. I left—I walked out. Jonas texted to remind him about something at Raven and I left.”
“Raven? I thought he quit,” Kane said.
“Yeah, but Jonas has the flu, so he asked him to cover tonight.”
Kane went into the kitchen, grabbed two more beers, and handed him one.
“You know you never could share.”
“What?”
“It’s true. Anytime we needed to share something even when we were younger you couldn’t do it. It had to be all yours. I’m not surprised you can’t handle Travis and everyone in his life. You want him all to yourself,” Kane said.
“I’m not that bad. You make me sound like some selfish jackass.”
“Selfish, no. Possessive, absolutely.” Kane leaned back and put his feet up on the coffee table. “What I’m surprised about is you complaining about everything he does for others. This is Travis we’re talking about. It’s in his DNA to give his time to people, to be there for them. He’s been there for you how many times?”
Too many times.
“What the hell do I do now?” He downed the rest of the beer and slammed the bottle on the table.
“Talk to him when he gets home tonight and straighten it out. You’re still married. He hasn’t seen a divorce lawyer in the what—” Kane checked his watch. “Hour and a half since you left. Fix it.”
Fix it? Hell, he’d get down on his knees and beg.
Chapter Twenty
Travis
“Thanks for coming in tonight.”
“No problem.” Lightning flashed.
“Shit.” Billy stuck his head out the door. “It’s disgusting out. Be careful getting home.”
Travis hiked his backpack up on his shoulder and burrowed into his jacket. The rain had been relentless all week and tonight was no exception. Rain pounded on the awnings and made it difficult to see more than a few feet ahead of him. The street, silent this time of night, lay empty and dark ahead of him except for the occasional partygoer in a Halloween costume.
An hour in a steamy shower and another round of painkillers had done wonders for his headache. But nothing for his mood. The packed club had given him little time to think about anything but making the next drink.
Huge drops splashed his face and made their way down his neck. His jeans, already plastered to his body, made it difficult to walk. He should have called a cab instead of trying to walk to the subway. Old habits. The subway was only two blocks from Raven, if he remembered to walk the right way. An awning separated from its housing as he passed and dumped a massive collection of water on his right side.
Awesome. He grabbed his phone from his back pocket and put it in the front of his pants to prevent it from getting ruined. It would be a surprise if it still worked. The best thing he could do was to hurry. A streetlamp flickered at the end of the street and then went out.
Walking in Manhattan in the pitch dark wasn’t one of his favorite things to do. Between the darkness and the rain, he was lucky he knew where he was going. His phone vibrated in his underwear. That had to be one of the most ridiculous places to put it, but vibration meant it worked.
The whole night, he replayed the argument and tried to zero in on the words. The headache made his attempts at recollection fuzzy.
Alec said he loved him. Did that mean he was in love with him? After all these years, he would have said that they had some love for each other as best friends.
But there was no way to forget that Alec told him he could get a divorce or how angry he’d been when he found out he was at Peter’s. That was crystal clear.
He’d always play his feelings close to his chest, make a joke, or be silent before he expressed anything. He hadn’t realized Alec was treating their marriage like a real one. A real relationship. One where feelings had come into play.
He loved Alec. There wasn’t a doubt in his mind. At first, yes, the love thing was more of a bromance than a romance. Alec cared, and he showed it by all the little things he did for Travis. Things he didn’t need to do. He smiled as he remembered him trying to cook and almost burning down the kitchen. Alec made sure that he stopped by for lunch when he was in the city, he called and checked up on him, and he remembered more details about his own life than he did.
In the middle of all those gestures, he had fallen for the man. He started to think of them as together. He never told him. Maybe If he had said something sooner? Who the hell knows?
Who says it’s too late?
What had Jonas said? To do something for himself, just this once. Didn’t this qualify? Alec proved himself a million times. Everything he did for Tyler and for him. He didn’t have to arrange for Tyler’s aftercare or make sure Kane continued to look after him. That wasn’t part of their deal. Darkness lay ahead of him as the last bit of light from the streetlamp faded.
What more do you want?
Nothing else. God, he was an idiot. He should have told him sooner that everything he did mattered. That he mattered. He nearly stopped in his tracks.
That was it. Stupid, stupid, stupid.
Everyone came to Alec for what he could do for them, no one ever appreciated him. Did Alec think he was using him like everyone else?
He glanced around in the darkness. He saw the neon sign from the liquor store. Damn. He was almost to his old apartment; he’d end up walking right past it to get to the next subway entrance. A thunderclap startled him and he hurried his steps as he stuck close to the storefronts.
A huge hand wrapped around his arm and yanked him to the right. He stumbled but before he fell another arm grabbed his left arm and pulled him up.
“What the hell? Let me go!” He attempted to pull his arms free but he had no traction. His eyes adjusted to the darkness but the rain made it hard t
o focus. The thunder roared over his head and drowned out his screams. His feet dangled underneath him as they held him off the ground.
Without warning, he dropped straight into a puddle of water. Hands grabbed his hair and slammed his head down on the pavement while someone kicked him. His backpack softened the blow but then it disappeared and he curled into a ball on the pavement. Water soaked through his clothes and the cold seeped into his body. The hands punched him in the stomach.
Please go away—please, please go away…
He tightened his body further into itself as another punch landed to his side. The screech of metal sounded through the pelting of rain and someone grabbed his foot and dragged him across the pavement. His hands flew to his face, and the gravel ripped through the side of his cheek.
“Owww!” Another clap of thunder sounded followed by lightning. In that brief flash, he saw that there were two attackers wearing masks by a large green wall. The wretched smell of rotting food pushed its way through the rain and into his nose. The sound of metal must have been a dumpster lid. He tried to push himself up but a boot smashed into his shoulder, holding him in place. The pain slammed through him.
“It’s not him,” an angry voice said.
Arms yanked him up and tossed him onto a pile of bags. The lid crashed on top of him and hit his head. Water dripped across his face and over his eyes, and he swiped at it with his good arm. Seconds later, he licked his lips. A metallic taste seeped into his mouth. Great, that wasn’t water dripping down his face. It was blood.
He needed to get out of this dumpster. But what if the two guys were out there? The lid lay snug on the top of the dumpster and there wasn’t a way to peek. Not that he’d be able to see anything. He couldn’t open one of his eyes and it was dark in the alley.
A bag shifted underneath him and his body teetered to one side—the side with all the pain. Fuck, this hurt. He moved his legs and smashed the bags under him so he was in a seated position and off his injured shoulder. A hard object hit his groin.
What is that?
Oh my God! He reached into his pants and pulled out his cell phone. The cracked screen lit up, and he tapped his flashlight app. Yup, he was in a dumpster. The pelting of water lessened to a dull roar over his head.
He clicked on the photo app, tapped the flash, and took a selfie of his face. The image that greeted him scared the crap out of him. Gravel embedded into the side of his face, mixed with blood. His eye was covered in blood from an open cut by his hairline. He closed his good eye and took a deep breath. He was alive, and that was what mattered.
If he called the cops, this would be all over the news tomorrow. There would be no containing it.
Alec. He needed to get to Alec.
More blood dripped on his face. A fierce stab of pain interrupted his thoughts. He couldn’t stay here.
Flashlight app on once again, he used his good shoulder to shimmy open the dumpster lid. The rain had slowed and allowed him to see that no one stood in the alley. His shoulder protested the heavy lid, and he closed it onto himself. He needed a minute to gather his strength. These things weren’t that heavy, but with only one good arm it wasn’t easy to lift.
One, two, three!
He jammed his shoulder into the corner of the lid until it was high enough to get his arm under it. With his remaining strength, he forced his legs into a standing position to push the lid open. A huge bang sounded as the lid crashed into the wall.
He looked behind him and then his eyes darted in front of him. The alleyway was still empty. Hoisting himself up and out of the dumpster turned out to be impossible and after attempting it twice with no success, he rested on the garbage bags.
He needed help before those assholes came back.
Alec was across town, and Kane, who the hell knew where he was at this time of night? Jonas! Oh God, was Jonas at his old place? He grabbed his cell and thumbed to his name. He’d been sick the last time they spoke, so he prayed the cold medicine hadn’t put him to sleep and he heard his cell phone.
“Hello…?” Jonas mumbled.
“Jonas, please tell me you’re sleeping at my place tonight.”
“Dude, it’s… three in the morning.”
“I need you. I got jumped in an alley and I’m stuck in a dumpster.” A bag ripped under him and sent him crashing into the side. “Oww, shit.”
“Wait, wait, what?”
“Jonas, wake up, please. I’m serious.”
“Shit, okay. Okay. I’m at your place. Where are you?”
“I’m not sure. I passed the liquor store with the pink sign.” He looked up as the streetlamp flicked on. “I turned the corner—wait—on Fifth. I’m on Fifth in an alley. Please hurry.”
“Stay on the phone with me, hon. I’m coming. Did you call the cops?”
“No, I wanted to get out of here first in case they came back.”
“Hold on. Stay with me, okay?” Jonas coughed and then sneezed.
“I’m sorry. I know you’re sick.”
“Shut up about that.” Jonas wheezed.
Even with the rain, he heard a door close and another one open.
“I’m on the street heading to you. Are you hurt?”
“Yeah, I’m messed up. My face is bleeding and my head hurts.”
“You probably have a concussion. You’re definitely staying on the phone with me.” A fit of coughs erupted through the phone.
The sound made the pain in his head much worse and he cringed.
“Travis! Are you there?”
“Yeah.”
“I heard a weird sound from you.”
“Shit hurts.”
“I’m at the corner by the flower shop. I’m coming.”
One more block. He’d have to hold on for one more block. He could do this. It would be much better if he could get out of this damn dumpster. Another bag popped open from his weight. His stomach rolled as the stench hit him and the urge to vomit came up so fast that he could only turn his head to one side to avoid throwing up all over himself.
“Travis! Travis! Are you there?”
He wiped his mouth with his hand and more pain came from everywhere. His lip throbbed, his shoulder screamed, and blood rushed into his eye.
“Travis?”
“Yeah, yeah. Got sick. Still here. Thought they would kill me.” He exhausted all of his energy with his attempts to get out of the dumpster. He sank into the swampy mess of garbage.
A voice traveled through the alley and he couldn’t tell if it was his phone or not. He must have been hallucinating. It sounded like an echo, almost in stereo.
“Travis!”
The intense pain in his head caused him to close his eyes. The pain dulled with his eyes closed but increased in droves he moved. Jonas screamed into the phone.
“Travis! Goddamn it, I’ll kill you myself when I find you!” Jonas shouted. Things were fuzzy but that made him laugh. At least he thought it was a laugh.
He groaned into the phone. The bags deflated and pushed him further into a horizontal position. He pushed to sit upright but it hurt way too much. His hand closed around something hard, which clanked into the dumpster as he scrambled to right himself.
A pocket of water hit him on his head and he shivered. No way he would pass out now. He picked up his hand with the object in it and banged it against the dumpster.
“Do that again.”
His other shoulder burned as he flung his hand toward the dumpster.
“I’m close.”
“Travis!” The voice came from the outside more than his phone.
“Here.” A dumpster lid opened.
“Don’t see you.”
“Wrong one.”
He pressed the music app on his phone and turned it up. A face popped up over the side and a light shone in his face.
“Holy shit, you are a mess.” Jonas wheezed as he held out his hand. “Can you stand?”
He shut off his phone and grabbed onto Jonas.
“Lean her
e for a minute.” Jonas disappeared out of sight and a round of coughs erupted from him. A light beamed and Jonas walked around the dumpster to rearrange the bags in that corner as high as he could.
“Hold on to the side and walk up the bags. Give me your phone.”
He held out his phone and Jonas powered on the light. With both lights on him, he saw the pile of bags and stumbled to them. Seconds later, he was at the edge of the dumpster.
“You need to jump.”
“I can’t. My side is all fucked.”
“Lie on your stomach on the top bag, then swing your legs over the side. That’s it.” The light dulled as Jonas grabbed his legs and pulled toward him. With only one eye and no light, he had to rely on whatever Jonas wanted him to do. He didn’t care as long as he got the hell out of this alley.
“Push off now with your arms so that your feet dangle. I’ve got you.”
He was much heavier than Jonas. How in the world…
Arms came around him and held him tight as his feet touched the ground. His legs gave out and his body started to protest.
“I’ve got you.” Jonas whipped around and faced the dumpster. He saw two quick flashes go off and then they turned to exit the alley.
“Can you make it back to my… your place?”
“It’s your place, J.” He sighed as he pictured the walk. He could try.
“Yeah, let’s do this.” His leg wasn’t happy with this decision and made its protest known with every step.
“Not a fan of your new cologne. Eau de dumpster is not sexy.”
He laughed and clutched his side with a grunt. “Don’t.”
“What the hell happened to you?”
“Two guys grabbed me, beat the crap out of me, and tossed me in the dumpster.”
“Jesus,” Jonas replied.
They hobbled along and turned the corner. Not much further. He could do this.
“Was it busy tonight?”
“In the beginning, but then I guess people didn’t want to come out in the weather.”
“Yeah, it was coming down earlier.”
“I have water in some interesting places.” When those two assholes threw him in the puddle, he might as well have been in a bath with his clothes on.