Deciding to nip it in the bud, call her out on it, I stepped closer until my side pressed against hers. “There’s a reason that happened in there.”
“No, there isn’t,” she hissed, twisting out of my hold to resume stalking toward our hotel. “That was you wanting to push the limit,” she then called over her shoulder. “To live up to the rock star persona you think you need to be.”
I caught up in two strides, this time gripping both of her bare arms and forcing her to look at me. “Cut the shit, Lori. You kissed me as much as I kissed you. You can pretend all you want, but that was more than either of us expected.” Leaning down toward her face, narrowing the distance between our lips to a mere inch, I added, “Admit it.”
“No!” She stepped back from me, as though suddenly remembering we were on a busy street in a foreign city. Her eyes darted away to follow a group until they disappeared into Dolly’s. “What is it you expect, Cannon? Because I seriously believe you don’t have a clue. Until yesterday, you’ve never even flown on a goddamn airplane.”
“What the fuck does that have to do with anything?”
“It has to do with the fact you haven’t lived yet. What do you know of expectations? Do you even know what’s about to happen to your life? You are on fame’s doorstep. But here’s the thing about fame: she can be very generous with the spoils she’ll shower you with. On the other hand, fame can be your worst nightmare. Beyond cruel in the way she’ll steal your privacy without mercy. Everything you do and say will be scrutinized. If you fuck a groupie, you’ll be labeled a man-whore. If you don’t, you’re gay. You can’t win, Cannon.”
“Why are you telling me this?” I couldn’t believe what she was resorting to just to avoid the reality of what happened. “Are you trying to scare me from wanting it?”
“No. I’m trying to prepare you. That’s my job, as your agent… to be sure you’re ready to handle all the good, and the bad, that’s about to happen to you. I can’t do that if you get lost in this twisted fantasy you’ve conjured up in your head.”
“Fantasy?”
“You see me as your savior right now. You’re enamored with the idea of all I portray—a strong female who has your back. Like your mom did, your sisters.”
Releasing her arms, I clenched my fists. “Shut the hell up, Lori. You don’t know me.”
“Yes, I do. You’re no different than every one of my past relationships, whether sexual or not. My entire life I’ve been surrounded by men like you, so I think that gives me one up on your cluelessness.”
“Really? So you know me so well?” With one large stride I positioned my body flush against hers, placing a firm hand on her back to prevent her from adding space. She gave me a long, hard look before I said, “Then you must think I just want to fuck you.” It wasn’t a question, and before she replied, I admitted, “And you’d be right. I do.” Bringing my mouth a whisper from hers, I stared into her angry eyes catching each breath she exhaled through my parted lips. “But I also want to change you… change how you think, feel.”
When I brushed my lips against hers, she shivered against me. When I added distance with one swift jerk of my head, she frowned.
“But if you’re so sure that I’m just like the rest of them, then hang out with the yacht guy and pretend to be something you’re not.” The anger that had consumed her instantly morphed into something else as proof in the shimmer in her eyes and the slight quiver of her bottom lip. I cupped her face gently while huffing out a sarcastic puff of air. “I see the real you, Lori, even if you feel the need to hide from it.”
As quickly as the emotions took over, she pushed them away, standing taller and more determined. “You just signed a contract, and everything you do from here on in holds you accountable to LRV.”
“I’m pretty fucking sure there wasn’t a mention in that stack of papers I signed that said I couldn’t kiss you, Lori.” Once again, I stepped right into her personal space. “Or do anything else with you for that matter.”
She locked her furious gaze on me, and in doing so she worsened my excitement. How badly I wanted to fuck that smirk right off her face, turn it back into the open-mouthed manifestation she had revealed in the bar when we parted… one filled with desire for so much more than just a kiss. She could deny this “thing” happening between us all she wanted.
Not me, I didn’t play games. I saw it, called it, said it like it was. I may have only been twenty-three years old, but I’d never pretended to be something I wasn’t, or deny something I wanted. With that silky auburn hair, those vivid green eyes, a brain in her head, and a body that could stop traffic—I’d say it… she was my fucking weakness.
While glaring at each other, we waged a power struggle between her denial and my determination. By now we had attracted enough attention that a few idiots were encouraging more drama with their whistles and catcalls. The last thing I wanted was to embarrass her or make a spectacle of myself right out of the gate. But as far as I was concerned, this battle wasn’t over.
“Let’s get out of here.” I snatched her hand and headed for the hotel.
Not another word was said between us during the two-block walk, but there was most definitely a storm of unresolved emotions traveling between us through the conduit of our linked fingers.
Just as we entered the hotel lobby she snapped back to her senses and realized I was still holding her hand. A slight tug had me releasing her as we stepped into the elevator. The ride to our floor was deathly silent, and the moment the doors opened she stormed down the hall, rammed the keycard into the reader, and allowed the heavy wood to slam behind her without another word.
“Goodnight to you too,” I grumbled, sliding my own key into the door beside hers. Slapping my hand against the light switch, one look at my quiet room almost forced me to head right back out.
My stupid impulsivity had cut the night short, probably ruined any kind of fun we could have had the next day touring Dallas, and no doubt created an uncomfortable plane ride back to LA.
Shit, I had most definitely fucked things up. Yet I couldn’t bring myself to regret it. She had kissed me back and gotten just as lost in it as I had. If it hadn’t happened tonight, it would have eventually anyway.
The more I tried to break it down, the clearer it became. She saw me as another mistake, and something pinched deep in my gut that wanted to prove her wrong… prove I didn’t deserve to be shoved into the “rock star” box she’d stuck me in. All she had were assumptions and history to back her up.
I didn’t fuck around.
I didn’t screw just any pussy.
Fuck… I haven’t gotten laid in two months. Yes, I was counting.
Could I have? Uh, yeah.
But fucking random women wasn’t my thing.
Not until I saw my reflection in the mirror above the dresser did I realize I’d been pacing in my room. I stared at the connecting door with a firm shake of my head. If she was so hell-bent on judging me, then fuck her. I didn’t give a shit what she thought of me.
Yeah, right.
Because when I stripped and jumped into the shower, it took no less than a minute before I saw her face behind my closed lids. When I began stroking my cock because of it, I knew she had gotten to me.
With my left hand firmly pressed against the cold tile, my right helped release the sexual frustration that Lori was responsible for. I was totally aware it was a desperate move, yet I couldn’t give a shit. I was hard as stone, and self-preservation made this a necessity.
Each tug of my pulsing cock was made with purpose… every twist of my palm across my feverish flesh brought me closer. I imagined what she would feel like, taste like, sound like. It wasn’t hard to do while the visuals came quick and easily. The more the imaginary movie played in my head, the quicker I came to becoming unhinged.
Water pelted my back in rhythmic waves as the shudder that hit during my release almost caused my knees to buckle. Despite coming like a beast, I felt no better. In fact, I fe
lt worse. A vortex of confusion and lust and doubt and anger swirled treacherously in the center of my chest.
“Fuck,” I hissed. Twisting the knob toward cold, I gritted my teeth when the water became a punishing strike of icy needles and stood under the spray until I couldn’t take it anymore.
As I wrapped a towel around my waist, you’d never know that just a few hours before I was flying high after signing on with LRV. Instead, there I was moping like an idiot. I had a long road ahead of me, and I wanted her taking it with me. I knew the night she came into Hops and Soul that there was a reason the universe had sent me Lori Banzini.
Gripping the edge of the vanity, I stared at myself in the mirror. “You need to fix this.”
A few minutes later, I sagged my still-damp body onto the bed and grabbed my phone.
You up?
Her response came quick.
Yeah.
I’m sorry.
The dots danced, paused, and then danced again. Expecting a lashing, when the words Me too appeared, I felt a touch less anxious but no less sated.
Chapter 14
Lori
I needed to keep this infatuation he had toward me contained. There wasn’t a doubt in my mind I was a shiny new toy that he’d tire of once the novelty wore off. I was fairly confident I’d be able to keep my client in check. It was my job to do so. Basically, if I couldn’t manage that, I had no business being an agent.
The real problem in this situation was keeping myself in check. If he had laid me down right there in the center of all those two-stepping Texans, I probably wouldn’t have stopped him. His lips moving over mine had stolen my logic… sucked it right out of me.
I freakin’ kissed him back!
What the hell was wrong with me? Worse than that, the switch he’d flipped in my libido hadn’t shut off since I’d stormed into my room pretending anger, when in fact it was mortification. Seconds after slamming my door shut, I pleasured myself while imagining him breaking through the connecting door into my room and devouring every inch of my body.
And once I got that out of the way, he had to go and text those two words—managing to add swooning to the lust he was already responsible for.
I didn’t swoon!
What was it about a man who said he was sorry? Honestly, that was a first for me. No one I’d ever been with had uttered those two words before. Okay, maybe I was exaggerating, but if they had, it definitely hadn’t gotten to me like when Cannon had texted them last night.
After I’d apologized as well, we’d texted back and forth for a few more minutes, deciding on what to do in Dallas. Feeling horrible that I blamed him for my weak willpower, I’d said we could do whatever he wanted, since we were ultimately celebrating his success.
Once we’d said goodnight, I’d lain in bed feeling out of sorts.
While on my side of the dividing door, I’d spent a long time thinking of the man on the other side. Besides a cocky arrogance, Cannon was also sweet and considerate… a dangerous combination. Cool air from the air conditioner had done little to wane the flash of heat that consumed me. Slipping my hand into my silk pajama shorts, I’d initiated another round of fantasies, and this time our raw, uninhibited fucking had turned into sweet lovemaking. And once again, it had left me unsatisfied and hungry for more.
After last night, I was pretty sure carpal tunnel syndrome was in my future.
By morning, I’d regained a handle on myself, blaming my upcoming period as the reason I’d nosedived off the cliff into unprofessional waters. Back to business, I dressed in khaki shorts, a sleeveless T-shirt, and the only pair of casual shoes I had—a pair of navy Chucks.
When I walked into the hotel restaurant and spotted him sitting casually at a table, my PMS theory blew up into a million pieces.
Long, denim-clad legs casually stretched out under the table. Worn black boots I already recognized were probably his favorite. Another faded T-shirt that looked as soft as his lips felt. Combined, the whole package that was Cannon Davis reignited the flame that had ravaged my lower half all night long.
“Morning,” he said with that adorable smirk.
“Good morning.” I sat across from him at the small square table and helped myself to the carafe of coffee he had waiting. “Did you sleep well?”
“Yeah, once I settled down.”
Dammit, I couldn’t handle it if he went there and needed to nip it in the bud. “Cannon, last night…”
“Yeah, I know,” he said, cutting me off. “How was your night?”
“Good,” I lied. “I worked for a while before conking out,” I lied some more. Taking the opportunity to change the subject, I pulled an envelope out of my bag. “I had a delivery this morning.” Cannon watched as I produced an American Express Gold Card and presented it with a smile.
“Seriously?” he asked, looking like a little boy who was just given a new bicycle.
Passing it to him, I said, “Everything you do is to be expensed on LRV.”
“Holy shit.”
I tried to ignore how it brought a lump to my throat when he adorably ran his fingertip across the raised embossing of his name. Next I passed him a page with his team’s cell numbers and a stack of health insurance documents. “Once you get back to LA, you can fill those out.” Finally I pulled out a schedule and handed it to him.
He scanned the paper and immediately asked, “Photo shoot in New York? Why not LA?”
“It needs to happen sooner than later, and the label’s photographer is in the middle of a year-long obligation in Manhattan and can’t leave. While there, I thought it would be great for you to meet Jack and Leila Lair, and we can utilize their studio if you want to.” Cannon’s brows rose in surprise. “They’ll be great to give you the kind of advice I can’t—how to handle the fame.”
“I’m obviously starstruck right now. Hope I don’t act like a fool.”
“Then you’d act no differently than Jack did way back when,” I teased, causing an easy chuckle to rumble out of Cannon, and shit it sounded so sexy. Continuing, I added, “Point is, they were no different than you before it all began.”
“Didn’t he and Leila hook up before they went on tour?” The humor in his eyes also held a sensuous flame. Before I could retort with a scolding comment, he added, “Kidding.” He just loved to rile me up. Refusing to give him ammunition, I simply sat silently. A few long seconds passed with the only communication happening between us in the undeniable sparks of electricity we swapped through our gazes. He broke first, scrubbing a hand over his face to reveal a grin once it reached his scruff-covered jaw.
“This is really happening,” he said in awe.
“It is.” I used prepping my coffee as an excuse to disregard his sexual energy. Only after I took a sip did I return my attention his way. “We’ll lay out your studio time after we land tomorrow afternoon. If you want to keep playing your regular gigs, we can work around them.”
“The only one I really want to keep is Hops and Soul. They’ve been really good to me.”
“No problem. It’s important to be rested; recording an album is hard work.”
“Well, you know what they say about all work and no play.” Shifting to lean his elbows on the table, he gave me a genuine smile. “I thought we’d have a nice breakfast, and then we’re hitting Six Flags Over Texas.”
“The amusement park?” At seeing my head slide left to right, he bobbed his up and down. “Yep.”
“I’m really not the amusement park type,” I lied for a third time. One summer Leila, Alisa, and I had spent almost every damn day at the Six Flags in Jersey. “It’s too hot out.”
“Agreed, which is why we’re going to the water park.”
“I don’t have a bathing suit with me.”
“There’s a boutique in the lobby.”
I folded my arms and leveled him with an obstinate glare.
“Louis said to enjoy ourselves… and you said it was my choice. Not interested in old buildings or watching fish
having fun behind glass. I’d rather we have our own fun. One hour… if you aren’t having fun by then, we hit the fish instead.” He reached his sexy hand across the table. “Deal?”
Pretending to be put out by his plan for the day, I huffed a puff of air, rolled my eyes, and slid my hand in his. “Fine. You have one hour.”
When he held it a few seconds longer than necessary, I already regretted agreeing.
I spotted Cannon waiting a few feet away, wearing the black trunks and rubber flip-flops he’d purchased. With hands on hips, he had no clue every female in the vicinity was ogling him, both young and old.
When his gaze swept over me, I wanted to run. I had chosen the most conservative suit in the store, a modest one-piece in black. Regardless, in the way he surveyed me I may as well have been naked. In that moment, I felt like a shy, giddy schoolgirl erotically dancing for a rock god, when in fact I was merely walking a straight line.
The man had some sick hold over me. Agreeing to whatever he suggested, whether a kiss or a day at the water park, made me second-guess my strength. The balls of steel I’d been accused of sporting most of my adult life retracted and disappeared when in his presence.
“Hey.”
“Hi. For the record, you owe me big for this.”
“Worth whatever it costs me,” he said, sliding his eyes over me like a caress. “For the record,” he repeated my words, “my one-hour time frame doesn’t start until our asses are on that.”
Cannon pointed to the gigantic blue waterslide, which twisted and turned before sending you shooting into what looked like a giant funnel that led into a pool. One by one, I watched in utter horror as idiot after idiot screamed their asses off when they surfaced. Some of the riders came out solo, while others shared the same inner tube. Either way, that thing had humiliation written all over it.
“No way.”
“Yes way.” He came to stand right beside me, the excited boyish look on his face contradicting the sexy body it belonged to. “It’s just a ride, Lori. We’ll go down together,” he said proudly.
Liner Notes Page 10