by Minna Howard
They arrived at the beach. It was not too far from the villa, but the traffic was heavy, trailing along the coastline while the sea flashed like polished silver in the sun. Sylvia parked the car and they went down to the ‘private’ club, which really meant that if there was room, anyone who paid the day’s fee was welcome.
Flora had a moment’s panic but after trawling through her bag, found a stash of euros still in their plastic packet, which meant she could pay for a sunbed and use of the facilities for the day. It was early, so there were not many people about and the four of them went to the end of the beach and settled themselves down.
With suncream applied, hats and dark glasses on, books and newspapers taken out, Martha and Sylvia began to interrogate Flora about her friendship with Susie and Matt.
‘We’d lived close to each other in Fulham, until they moved to Cambridge,’ Flora said, hoping that was sufficient explanation. She felt far too hot to talk.
‘So, did you know Alegria?’ Martha asked, her slightly foxy face eager.
‘I saw her a few times in the holidays because she was at boarding school.’ Flora remembered the small, pale girl who often appeared at weekends or holidays from school. She sometimes played with their girls, though she was a shy, difficult child and didn’t really fit in.
‘And she’s turning up unexpectedly,’ Sylvia pronounced, ‘but that’s what they do today, isn’t it? And your children, where are they?’ She sounded rather like one of the social workers who had plagued Susie about Alegria from time to time.
‘They’ve both just gone to the University of Pennsylvania,’ she said, with a touch of pride.
‘Oh, very clever,’ Martha remarked. ‘Good on them.’
‘Yes, it was their decision. They thought it sounded more exciting than a British university. They have wonderful campuses there.’
They had gone together and with friends. Although Isabel had said she felt a bit homesick, both girls now seemed to be caught up in the excitement of the place and for that she was thankful. She didn’t want them to be unhappy or beg to come home but oh, how she missed them. It was like a pain in her heart.
To stop the two women’s questioning, she got up from her sunbed to go for a swim. The sun was too hot, even under an umbrella. It would take a day or so to get used to it. She wound up her long hair and secured it on top of her head and crossed the narrow line of sand to the gleaming water. She must buy some of those rubber shoes, she thought, as she painfully picked her way through the sea until it was deep enough to launch off and swim.
It was glorious, the water fresh on her skin, the intense blue of it blending into the sky, where the harsh gold of the sun beat down. She swam out a little, then up and down. Forgetting her hair, she lay on her back, floating. She trod water, looking back at the land. The beach looked pretty with its green and yellow parasols dotted beside the green sunbeds. More people were arriving, a couple of small children with buckets and spades and their mothers, a couple entwined and then magically, there was Xavier and behind him, Didi and Tony. Was Hugo there? She swam a little closer to the shore to check, but he didn’t seem to be. She didn’t see Matt either; he and Susie were waiting for Alegria to turn up, so Hugo wouldn’t be alone at the villa.
A buzzing sound like an angry insect made her turn and she saw, further out, a couple of ski bobs chasing each other across the sea, bouncing off the waves and leaving a wedge of white spume behind them. She swam back to the shore and hobbled back over the stones to the sand, water dripping down her back from her now soaking hair. The heat hit her, drying her almost at once and making her skin feel as if it was encrusted in salt.
The three newcomers were settling themselves down next to Sylvia, Martha and Ben. Xavier watched Flora from behind his dark glasses and she immediately felt shy and ungainly. She told herself to stop remembering that summer long ago when they were in love. She was no longer a young woman and her body had carried two children since then. She was being foolish to imagine he still cared for her in the same exhilarating way as he had all those years ago.
‘Good swim? Can’t wait to get in,’ Xavier greeted Flora, picking up her towel from the only unoccupied sunbed, and bringing it to her as she reached the sand. For a moment she was eighteen again, remembering how they swam in the cold, grey North Sea and he wrapped her in her towel and in his arms.
She stretched out her arm and took the towel from him. ‘Thanks,’ she said, ‘it’s wonderful out there, but I must remember to buy some of those rubber shoes for the stones.’
‘Oh, you can borrow mine,’ Sylvia said. ‘Sorry, I should have thought. It is quite stony here. I think they tried to do something about it, without much success.’
‘Thank you, but I will get some. Hugo and I must hire a car. We could so easily have done it from his office but he…’ She was not going to say he was lukewarm about this holiday, their first one without the girls. Usually he’d have got them a car and picked it up at the airport.
‘So, any sign of Alegria when you left?’ Martha asked the new arrivals.
‘No, not yet,’ Didi said, stripping off to a very smart red swimming suit and settling down to soak up the sun. ‘But we thought it was a good idea to give Susie and Matt a quiet day to themselves, so here we are.’
Sylvia got up to swim while Ben and Martha went to the bar to get drinks. Flora and Xavier were left alone. She settled on her sunbed, stretching out and picking up her book. Xavier sat down on the end of her bed, by her feet.
‘I can’t believe you’re here, after all this time,’ he said, ‘and you haven’t changed.’
‘Of course I have, we both have,’ she said fiercely, to hide a sudden burst of desire. ‘We’re almost twenty years older and have children. I also have a husband whom I love.’
He’d taken off his sunglasses and was watching her with those dark smouldering eyes she’d loved so much. She wanted to cry, it’s too late, it’s not fair that you have turned up again when my marriage seems so vulnerable without our children.
She opened her book, a fat historical novel that she hadn’t yet got to grips with. The words danced before her eyes, making no sense at all.
To her relief, she heard the others coming back. Xavier got up, saying he too would get a drink and could he get her one.
‘Yes, please,’ she said, not looking up, afraid he would see her desire for him written on her face. ‘Fresh orange if they have it, with loads of ice.’
8
Xavier put Flora’s orange juice down with almost exaggerated care on the small plastic table beside her, but before she could thank him, he moved away to sit with Tony at the bar.
Flora watched him through her dark glasses. He held himself well, being tall with a grace about him, his slightly long dark hair curling into his neck. In case he sensed she was looking at him, she turned her attention back to her book, but couldn’t make sense of it and kept having to go back to re-read the paragraph she’d just read. For a moment she wished they hadn’t come out here to stay with Matt and Susie.
There was a shout, then a scream and a woman went tearing down the beach to the sea. Flora saw that a small child was thrashing about in the water close to her. She flung aside her book, sprang up and dashed into the sea. The child was face down, his body jerking as he panicked. She was beside him in an instant, oblivious to the stones under her bare feet, the water almost up to her chest. The waves came on relentlessly, threatening to unbalance her, take the child away. She managed to grab him before the wave took him, heave him up out of the water. He clung to her, gulping air, spluttering out seawater, almost knocking her over.
‘Give me the child and let’s get to the shore.’ Xavier was now beside her. Taking the boy from her, ignoring his cries and telling everyone, including his now sobbing mother, to get back to the beach where there was no danger of losing their balance.
Other people joined them inspecting the child, suggesting that he might need to see a doctor. Xavier agreed in impeccable Frenc
h, then explained to the boy’s mother that it would be best to have him checked out, in case he’d knocked his head.
Flora limped out of the water on to the sand. Xavier exclaimed. ‘Your feet, they’re bleeding, you don’t want to get sand in the cuts.’ And before she could say anything, he swept her up in his arms and carried her to her sunbed while Martha and Sylvia hovered round them.
‘I’m fine, you can put me down,’ she said firmly, engulfed with forgotten emotions, feeling his bare chest, warm from the sun, salty from the sea, against her. ‘They can’t be more than scratches.’
He held her close, his voice soft in her ear. ‘I couldn’t resist holding you again.’ He laughed, put her down and left her to examine the soles of her feet, which were not badly hurt. The water had made it seem there was more blood than there was.
Didi, Sylvia and Martha fussed round her. ‘She wasn’t even watching him, just chatting to her friends,’ Sylvia said. ‘He can’t be very old and he could have drowned. Honestly, some people.’
‘Good thing you got there in time,’ Didi said, patting her on the shoulder.
Flora felt exhausted now, faint from the effort and the shock. She lay back on the sunbed and closed her eyes, still feeling Xavier’s arms round her, the warmth of his skin, his mouth soft in her ear. She was disturbed a few moments later by the mother and the little boy she’d rescued.
‘Say thank you to the lady, Robin,’ the woman said, but the boy stayed silent, clinging to her hand.
‘I can’t thank you enough,’ the mother said, near tears.
‘I just happened to be the person nearest to him. I hope there won’t be any ill effects,’ Flora said, seeing how traumatised she was by the incident.
‘No, just a fright.’ The woman hovered, not knowing what to do with herself now and with an awkward smile, she moved away. A few minutes later they saw her leave the beach with the child and her friends.
Tony said. ‘Didi and I are going back to the villa. Would you like a lift back, Flora, or do you want to stay here?’
She could see Xavier sitting at the bar talking to some people. She must go back and be with Hugo. ‘Thanks Tony, I would like to go back. I’ve had enough of the sea today,’ she said.
‘It’s our turn to cook and Didi wants to marinate the fish,’ Tony said. ‘Take your time, we’ll leave when you’re ready.’ He smiled. He had a rather cavernous face and the smile lifted it.
Didi hovered beside her. ‘Are you all right? It was quite a shock. I’d say you got there in the nick of time.’
‘I was just the nearest but he’d have probably been all right, just in a panic.’ She got up off the sunbed, her body dry now from the sun and pulled on her T-shirt and shorts over her bathing suit.
‘Take it easy when you get back, perhaps a lie down in the cool of your room,’ Sylvia said, frowning. ‘These things can take more out of you than you think.’
‘I’m fine, thanks. I’ll go back and catch up with my husband.’ It seemed important to mention Hugo.
‘I’m sure he’ll be very proud of you,’ Martha said. Flora smiled, though she wondered if he’d care. She’d tell the girls about it, though, text them perhaps.
She walked past Xavier at the bar on their way out. He was talking to a couple. The woman was brown and beautiful, apparently hanging on to his every word, while her plainer companion hovered close by.
‘You OK, Flora?’ Xavier called to her.
‘Fine, I’m going back to see what Hugo is up to.’ She ignored the shaft of jealousy that went through her as she saw how the woman beside him was sizing her up.
9
Susie was sitting by the pool doing her tapestry. Every house she’d ever lived in showcased her work, not only her dreamy photographs of nature, but her cushions and rugs and little pincushions and spectacle cases that she sold for charity.
‘How was the beach?’ she asked, when they joined her.
‘Fine, only some mother was not keeping an eye on her child and Flora had to wade in and save him from drowning,’ Didi said.
‘How dreadful, are you hurt?’ Susie swung her legs off the sunbed.
‘No, stay where you are, I’m fine.’ Flora wished everyone wouldn’t go on so much about this. ‘I came back to see Hugo. I thought we’d see about hiring a car.’
‘Oh, he and Matt have gone off to play golf.’ Susie settled down again. ‘But how brave of you. Sit down and relax. I was just about to have something to eat, did you eat at the beach?’
‘No… but…’ Flora sat down beside her. Hugo hated golf; he’d always said it was an old man’s game.
‘Bread, cheese and a tomato, OK?’ Susie moved again to get up but Didi said. ‘Don’t move, I’ll get it. Tony and I are the cooks today.’
‘I hope you really are OK, Flora,’ Susie said, seeing a trace of blood on Flora’s sandals. ‘It beats me how some of these parents leave their small children to amuse themselves in dangerous places.’ She smiled at Flora, put down her work. ‘Now tell me more about your girls. Going off to the US to college will surely give them many more chances in the world job market than just staying in the UK.’
‘Yes, it will,’ Flora said, trying to shift the constant ache round her heart. She didn’t want to talk about it or bore Susie, who might not understand her feelings of loss. Instead she said she’d have a quick shower first and wash the salt from her hair. She went to her room and stripped down, standing under the shower thinking of Xavier. She felt just as close to him as she had all those years ago. But those days when they were young and fancy-free were over, she reminded herself sternly.
She sent a silent message to her daughters to make much of this time, which would never come again.
She dried herself and put on another bathing suit and sarong and returned to join the others by the pool.
Matt and Hugo returned a couple of hours later, having lunched at the golf club and Susie told them about Flora’s bravery.
‘Goodness, lucky you were there and had such a quick reaction,’ Matt said.
‘Are you all right?’ Hugo asked, staring at her as if she was missing a limb, or perhaps an eye.
‘Fine,’ she said. ‘I wasn’t alone. Everyone came into the water. I just got to him first. How was the golf? I can’t remember when you last played, Hugo.’
‘I’m hopeless, but it was fun,’ he said uneasily, knowing how much he had ridiculed the sport over the years.
‘I think we ought to hire a car, go out and about, there’s so much to explore. Those dear little hill villages, the markets, wander round some galleries,’ Flora enthused.
‘Yes… if you want.’ Hugo sounded reluctant.
Susie said. ‘You can hire one from a garage in the village, just up the lane, a few minutes’ walk. Sylvia got hers there, shares it with Martha.’
‘Let’s do that then, darling,’ Flora said enthusiastically before turning to watch the drive. She had heard a car arrive but to her disappointment she saw it was Sylvia and co. She’d hoped it would be Xavier, but there was no sign of him and she wondered with a pang if he’d gone off with that beautiful woman.
‘I’ll show you the way to the car hire people, if you’d like. I need to get some more suncream,’ Susie said. ‘The two shops there will be open again now. Anyone else want anything?’
‘There’s no need, we could do it tomorrow.’ Hugo sounded exhausted. He sat down on one of the sunbeds by the pool, slipped his feet out of his espadrilles and lay back. ‘We’ll see about it, I promise,’ he said unconvincingly before closing his eyes.
‘I’ll come with you now, Susie, and rent one,’ Flora said firmly. ‘We might need it tomorrow morning, if everyone wants to go somewhere different, or something.’
‘Yes, I need a walk. I’ve lain about most of the day,’ Susie replied.
A few minutes later the two women went out of the gate and set off down the lane, Susie explaining that although it was hardly a village, it did have a boulangerie, a garage with its car hi
re business and a small shop. ‘Though we much prefer the market down in the town.’
The lane was dry and hot, the grass crisp and bleached. There were a few trees trying to offer shade and here and there another villa, just visible behind shrubs and trees and occasionally a high fence. They walked companionably together for a few minutes, Susie linking arms with her.
‘Tell me to shut up and it’s none of my business, but are things all right between you and Hugo?’ Susie turned to face her, grey eyes soft with compassion. ‘Marriages, even happy ones like ours, can go through some rocky patches.’
Her kind voice brought tears to Flora’s eyes. She swallowed and said. ‘It’s the girls leaving, going to uni in Pennsylvania. Ella did another course in London for a year so that she and Isabel could go to the US together. Hugo and I have barely ever lived alone. We didn’t live together before we got married. Ella was born five months after our wedding, then we had Isabel.’
‘So, it sounds as if you’re both suffering from empty nest whatever, and need to adjust.’ Susie squeezed her arm.
‘I suppose so, but it’s as if Hugo and I are strangers. I’ve tried to talk to him, tell him we can do lots of things together now. It’s wonderful to be asked out here and perhaps things between us will improve while we’re away from home. He’s exhausted, he’s had lots of work complications to sort out before we left.’ Flora hoped she sounded upbeat.
‘I was so distraught at not being able to have babies of my own, though of course I’ve had Alegria often enough. It’s hard when they make their own choices, go their own way.’ Susie said.
‘I know, and I understand the girls wanting to go to the US with some of their friends. It sounded exciting and they both worked so hard to get there. To be honest, I didn’t think they’d make it, but they did and I’m proud of them. It’s mean of me to wish they’d failed and were still near home.’ Flora was relieved she could confide in Susie and know it would go no further.