by Celia Crown
She nods impulsively. Sapphire blue glazes with undivided attention and it should be like this; all her thoughts should revolve around me.
“You said you were a bad girl for having those bad thoughts. You have to seek treatment to be a good girl again.” I pinch her round cheek, and she squeaks.
Her lips press into a thin line and her forehead crinkles. She struggles with her choices, but it’s easy to see which side wins because her shoulders slump and big, blue eyes shine with dismay.
“You will always be a good girl to me, but I want you to be the best girl.”
Her distressed cry and big pout weaken my resolve to be the mature adult; I couldn’t help but steal a kiss from her lips.
I pull back and let her lips chase after mine for her. She’s starting to get addicted to me. However, it is nowhere near the depth of my obsession to possess her.
“I don’t know how to be your best girl,” she said slowly.
“But you want to, don’t you?” I ask back, smiling down on her happy nod.
“I want to.” Charlotte leans on her toes to kiss me.
“Such a brave girl for me,” I praise.
Chapter Seven
Charlotte
It turns out that going outside at night isn’t as scary as I expected.
I don’t have sudden anxieties or the nauseating churns of my stomach at the new environment. I barely felt anything when I stepped outside my house for the first time in years. I open the windows, and I look out to the streets. It wasn’t a total shut-in. I just simply never went outside. There was no reason for me to go when I had everything accessible to me from home.
Being in a car was a bit different. I was still as a board when I sat in the passenger side while Alex stepped on the gas. I thought it was the weirdest feeling of having a seatbelt as my only protection from flying out the window if he braked too hard.
I know about cars. I just never remember being in one. I got used to it quickly because I had other things to worry about, such as Alex pushing on the gas and speeding down an empty street at one in the morning.
Or that’s what the clock on the car says.
“Alex!” I whisper frightfully, “Slow, slow! Go slow!”
Sweat runs down my temple as we zoom past city buildings that are all dark, save for some lone souls up in corporate buildings doing overtime. I don’t have much experience about the outside world other than what I see from the television and what goes on in social media platforms, but I do know that driving this fast is illegal.
“It’s forty, Charlotte.”
I refuse to look at him as my eyes are glued to the road, but I can hear the unimpressed tone in his voice.
“It feels like fifty!” I squeak as he speeds up.
He’s going forty in a thirty-five-mile zone, and I officially believe that he is intentionally trying to scare me.
I stammer with shuddering breaths, “H-how much longer?”
The seatbelt digs into my palms, but I don’t dare to let go of it. This thin material is going to save my life if anything happens and I need to be prepared for the worst; a car could possibly be driving recklessly and we could get into an accident.
I don’t have enough car experience to act accordingly. I’m not going to be fast enough to pull an ice barrier to shield us from impact.
“You’re being overdramatic,” Alex said, taking one of my hands from the seatbelt and interlacing our fingers.
I gulp thickly, “You need two hands to drive; it’s safer. Please stop scaring me!”
“You’re not in any danger, I’m not going to ever jeopardize your safety,” his actions don’t reflect his words, and my hand instinctively has a death-grip on the seatbelt.
He chuckles, and I would have scowled at him if I wasn’t scared out of my mind.
This jerk.
We passed so many streets and more buildings that I can count. My hand is simultaneously holding onto his hand and the belt across my chest. I’m not strong enough to break his bones, but I might be hurting him. I don’t have time to fight the guilt that I would have from seeing his bruised hand. The speed is shaking me to the core.
We stop at the gated entrance of a mysteriously-tall building with all the lights turned on from the windows. I inhale painfully. My heart thumps loudly with my ears tuning out the man talking to Alex by the window.
We go into an underground structure where there are more cars. It’s almost packed with only two free spaces in all the turns we took. Alex parks in the one closest to the elevator and helps me out of the car, but we don’t get into the elevator.
Alex guides me by the hand to a door that leads to outside. The cool air nicks my skin, and I thank him for knowing the weather is going to be chilly when he got me a sweater from my closet.
There isn’t much around other than barbwire fences, a tower on all four corners of the gated space with guards strapped with guns, and paved concrete flooring. I believe this was supposed to be a nice green grassy area. There’s a smaller building right next to the tall building.
The facility we’re walking towards is a one-floor structure that stretches widely, but it’s not as big as the main building where we parked the car.
“Where are we?” I ask Alex.
He glances at me from the corner of his eyes, “It’s a military medical research facility. There is a specialist here who I want you to meet.”
I hesitate., Meeting people is not what I had in mind when he said we’re going out. I didn’t know what to expect, and I should have thought about seeing other people, but my brain was still frazzled from our scandalous night activity.
Jesse cannot know.
This thought makes me ask, “Where’s Jesse?”
Alex said, “We’re meeting him in there.”
I sigh a breath of relief. At least he’s going to be with me too. I need all of my men next to me when I meet people for the first time. I make it sound like I have been in an underground bunker for years, and this is the first time I have had human contact.
Waving at neighbors count as human interaction. My hermit lifestyle is not that dramatic.
“Clip this on,” Alex hands me a badge with a little clip. I take it and put it in the middle of my sweater.
I wasn’t sure if I wanted to clip the visitor’s pass right above my boobs. I don’t want to draw attention to that part, but now that I think about it, people will notice a strange girl and her weird clip placement.
Whatever, what’s done is done.
Alex doesn’t say anything so I assume it’s fine, but he’s a man of sternness and all business by the look of his stoic façade.
This means serious business, whatever is in the building requires him to be detached from everything. I kind of like this side of him; he’s strong and powerful, ready to take on the world with his massive shoulders.
“Commander!” a voice startles me as the entrance door opens to a young boy in a uniform saluting to Alex.
Alex salutes back while we walk through the door as the young man holds it open for us. I would have said thank you if my tongue wasn’t tied. Also, he gave me a weird look because I’m walking funny; I can’t help the soreness between my legs.
Everything inside is white and stinky. It’s got this gross disinfectant smell to it, and it’s seeping into my pores. They must want to keep this place germ free, but that makes me even sicker. It’s so clean that it’s doing counterintuitive things to my body and I want to gag at the pungent scent as we make our way deeper into the building.
We pass five security doors and are scanned for weapons through an x-ray machine. The security here is crazy and very strict on professionalism.
I smiled at one of the guards, but her face is just blank.
That’s when I knew this place is nothing like they show in the movies as government settings.
This is the real deal.
Going through the last door should be a relief, and it is before it gets ruined by a lady doctor in her flut
tering white coat waiting for us. Her arms are crossed over her chest, and her stance is domineering. It rivals Alex’s, and I do not want a battle between dominance.
“You better have a damn good reason for calling me here last minute,” the woman demands.
I cast my eyes to the side, making myself smaller by sticking towards Alex’s back. This woman is resilient to Alex’s robust gaze. She stands with self-respect and dignity, not to mention the size of her calves can snap my neck from how tough and healthy they look.
“This is an emergency,” Alex says, and I could feel the heat from the woman’s stare on me.
“You have war in your heart, girl.”
My shoulder jumps at her voice directed at me. I peer at her through my lashes, and her glare sets the alarms in my head into a frenzy. The woman has a familiar aura as me; it’s magic sparking around her.
She’s a witch. A doctor and a witch, a witch doctor. I keep telling my brain to shut up before I blurt something out without meaning because I’m so nervous around her.
First outdoor experience and I meet one of the scariest people that walk on this planet.
Alex is one of them. I can’t even imagine what it would be like if he raised his voice at me. I’d be terrified and faint on the spot.
“Look at me!” The woman commands, and my natural instinct is to get rid of the factor that is causing me distress, but Alex squeezes my hand to bring my attention back to his reassuring presence.
I look at the woman. Her eyes scan my body with her sharp attention.
“Bring her to the quarantine wing,” she says to Alex without letting up her analyzing observation.
Quarantine? My heart leaps to my throat, and I stick closer to Alex as he pulls me towards another section of the building, I glance up at him for an explanation. I’m not infected with anything. I feel fine and even if I was, I doubt Alex would be touching me for his own safety.
“I’m here,” his simple words bring me greater comfort than being home by myself and sealed off from the world.
I trust him, and I know he would never let anything hurt me. This place is a stepping stone for me to get better, I can get help in here, and the voice will forever be gone.
“We are one”, the voice crackles, “You will die if I do”.
It doesn’t shock me; it’s not that I knew before the voice told me. I didn’t know. I thought it’s just something in me that’s not correctly balanced. It doesn’t shock me in ways that I should expect it to; I just don’t feel any emotions to that statement.
I notice that I stopped feeling defensive about the voice, but I’m not accepting it either. It’s as if the voice is commenting on the ocean for being blue. It’s neither disturbing nor interesting; it’s just background noise.
We go through another set of security where we had to get sprayed with cold and finely-misted moisture. I’m not wet, and I barely feel the wetness on my face.
I look around the room to find a camera in the corner of this cushioned space. The floor is padded with the same material on the walls. This looks like a room in the psychiatric ward from the movies, but there’s an examination table in the middle of the room.
It’s not those from the morgue; it’s made of strong metal with a cushion on top. Everything is protected with a layer of softness, but the white is offsetting my likings for this room.
There’s a knock on the door and Alex goes to it, but I stop him with my hand clinging to his fingers. I don’t want to be in this room by myself. It’s too open, and I just know someone is watching me through the camera.
“I won’t leave the room. I just need to see who’s at the door.”
I unwillingly let go with a jerky nod. My eyes follow him, not blinking once in fear that he’ll be gone. I am not taking the chance in this strange place. I would rather be safe than sorry.
The woman comes back with her heels and white coat. The crow’s feet around her eyes shows intelligence and wisdom but also less patience. Alex comes to stand by my side and lifts me onto the table. The sticky mat under my butt is so cleanly wiped that it’s gluing to my pants.
Alex stands off to the side but close enough for me to find his hand. I’m not comfortable with the doctor, and I don’t know what would happen if she touches me.
She shines a flashlight in my left eye and then my right without a word. I don’t flinch at the brightness. It’s just staring into a badly-shaded yellow circle; even I know that isn’t normal. Her face frowns. She shuts off the thin light to put it back into her breast pocket.
Snapping on a pair of white gloves to match the tasteless room, she unwraps the stethoscope from her neck and jabs the pieces into her ear. It looks painful from the way she aggressively jams it in, though she doesn’t look too bothered by it.
I narrow my eyes at the round thing she’s pointing at me. Alex clenches my hand, and I let the lady put it on my neck. The pulse there is steady even to my ears; it continues to be calm. I would have thought the more appropriate place to check is my heart, and she does that next by lifting my shirt before I could see what she’s doing.
The freezing metal touches my skin, and my tummy is exposed to the cold temperature in the room.
She drops her hand, and my clothes fall back down to cover my belly. She puts the instrument back on her neck. The doctor ungloves her hand and holds them out; they glow a pale shade of green.
It’s magic, and my hackles are raised.
“Relax, girl,” she said, “I am a medical witch. I heal, and I don’t hurt my patients. This is healing magic. I need to check your body for injuries.”
I shake my head, “I’m fine.”
“Then, I shouldn’t find anything wrong with you. There is no harm in being certain,” she counters.
I glare down on her hand, and Alex brings my attention to him, “It’s okay, let her check.”
Well, if he says it’s okay, then it should be fine. I nod jerkily, watching her hand come near me, and I sit frigidly. The first touch is cold. I can’t tell if it’s her finger or her magic. She starts with my free hand to show me that she is not harming me as her magic slowly flows into my body.
My brows knot in confusion; it’s a weird feeling. It’s like being submerged in a minty bath. The coolness penetrates my skin and coils around my insides.
It goes deeper than my physical body. She’s breezing past the barrier that taps on the door to my mind, and I will not let her in. This lady is taking a part of my body and a part of my control. I refuse to let her touch the one part that I am still clear about.
She pulls back. Her cooling magic recedes with her, and she drops her hand to her side.
“You have evil in your soul.”
I think she said something similar before, but I didn’t bother to remember what it was.
“You have black magic,” she points out; there is no doubt in her strong voice.
Once again, I don’t answer her. She steps back and lets Alex take her spot by cupping my face. He thumbs my cheek, and I lean against his warm palms. It’s a nice change to the room, which is ghastly white, and he’s a splash of color that I need.
“You have to tell her. She’s here to help you.”
I blink and nod. I swing my feet back and forth as he steps away. The witch doctor looks down on her hands and into my eyes. I furrow my brows at her unreadable expression. Deciphering her thoughts is impossible. I shouldn’t try it as it’s going to drain my mental energy.
“Commander had filled me in; you have been having nightmares, uncontrollable blackouts, and hearing a voice?” She says in a clipped tone.
She sounds like she’s in a hurry.
I nod, “Yeah.”
“What came first?” The doctor inquires.
I purse my eyes, cocking my head, and think for a moment. “The voice, and then the nightmares.”
“When did the voice come?”
Alex strokes circles on the back of my hand, I answer the best I can, “When I was ten.”
&n
bsp; “What happened at that time?”
Her questioning is too much. Why does she need to know these things? There is nothing wrong with me. I just need some medicine to balance back what’s imbalanced in me.
“Jesse left for the military,” I answer.
She hums and nods, the doctor turns to Alex and clears her throat, “May I have a word, commander?”
Alex nods, and she leaves first. Alex comes to stand between my legs and kiss my lips. He breathes in deeply and purrs his praise of me being a brave girl for talking about painful memories in front of a stranger.
“I’ll be right back,” he says.
I whine, “Hurry back.”
Alex chuckle, slanting his mouth over mine deeply. I mewl happily at his attention. I giggle lightly against his lips. He detangles my hands from his waist and walks over to the door. He turns back when he opens the door and nods at me.
I wave at him before he closes the door behind him.
I’m left in the room with the troubling snowy walls, swinging my feet back and forth to pass time. I count the little creases and folds on the padded walls, searching for the seams and connecting them with my eyes. Every square is perfectly fitted to the next, and it’s so perfect that it makes the room creepier.
Then I feel it.
The hairs on the back of my neck stick up, and my eyes fly to the door. Deep in my gut, there is a feeling of protectiveness and danger seeping and poisoning my mind with twinkling bells. My blood pours through my heart, igniting a flame of momentary insanity that snapped my vision black.
Jesse.
Chapter Eight
Alexander
The room is not a closed-off room; it’s a glass container with padded flooring and the examination table in the middle. Charlotte can’t see what’s outside, but we could see inside. Magic allows the interior room to look like a psychiatric room while it’s a glass box from the outside that is illuminated by white lights.
Jesse and I stand by the glass, watching the sapphire color fade to the same dreadful light blue. It’s the same color as the time her magic went wild and created spider cracks on the back of my hand.