by HJ Bellus
I chug the remaining water in the bottle. “You go after her?”
“Naw.” He shakes his head. “There was no excuse for what I did. Deserved the punishment.”
“That’s brutal, man.”
“It’s life.” He gets up to grab another beer from the six-pack he brought over. “Now let’s quit being pussies here. You got any porn or shoot ’em up flicks we can pass the time with?”
I shake my head. “Jesus, Cody, I ain’t watching porn with you.”
We find something on Netflix that satisfies Cody. I watch the show then go flip through my phone, looking at pictures of Kate and Finn, vowing to never walk out on what’s important in my life again, no matter what the circumstance. A smile turns up the corner of my lips when I see the picture of Kate adjusting her glasses while trying to read the instructions on a brownie mix box. The next one is of her asleep on my pillow. Her wild mane of blonde hair swirls around her shoulders, her lips are relaxed, and her hand rests on my chest in the bottom part of the picture. Then there’s one of her and Finn holding hands on one of our nighttime strolls.
I nod off to sleep, with the sound of the television in the background and thoughts of my little family filling my dreams. The way it should be.
An alarm blares, causing me to leap from my recliner. Cody does the same thing from the couch where he must have drifted off to sleep, too. The light from the TV flickers in the background.
“What in the hell is going on?”
“There’s a fire.” Cody slips into his boots.
“What? Where?” My foggy, sleep-riddled brain can’t keep up. It hits me that Cody is head of the volunteer firefighters here in town.
“In town a few blocks over.” Cody darts for the door and freezes in his tracks when he realizes what he’s said. He turns to me. “Max.”
“What’s the address?” I grit out.
“Stay here. You can’t leave. I’ll keep you updated.” He sprints out the door and into the darkness.
“What’s the address?” I roar.
He doesn’t answer, peeling away in his truck. I look towards Kate’s house to see the glow of a fire and smoke billowing toward the full moon.
“No, no, no.”
“Dad?” I turn in the doorway leading out to the porch to see Finn wiping the sleep from his eyes. “What’s going on?”
My world is ending, I think to myself.
“Nothing, bud. Cody fell asleep here and had to leave.”
“What time is it?” He yawns wide.
“Let’s go back to bed, son.”
My phone rings in the living room. I race to get it, hoping like hell to see Kate’s name. My hope evaporates when Dad’s pic and name race across the screen.
“Hey,” I answer, guiding Finn back to his room.
“We are on our way. Cody called us. Mom will stay with Finn. You wait until we get there.”
“Dad.”
“Max, listen to me. We don’t know anything yet. Stay at the house.”
I drop the phone to the bed and help Finn in.
“You forgot to push the button, Dad.” He picks it up and ends the call. Once he’s snuggled back in the blankets, he begins to drift off but not before he crushes me.
“Dad, can Kate be my mom?”
I brush back his hair and kiss his forehead. “She sure can, and I know she’d love it.”
“Love you, Dad.”
I don’t get the chance to repeat the words back to him before he’s sound asleep. I don’t move until I hear Dad’s truck pull up. I creep from the bed, numb and scared as hell. Mom meets me in the hallway.
“He’s asleep. Shouldn’t wake up until around six forty-five.” My voice is flat.
“Max, everything will be all right.”
I want to scream or punch something because nothing will ever be the same. I don’t need to know the exact address of the house fire to know it was Kate’s. That thought snaps me back to life. I’m out the front door and in the front seat of Dad’s truck. He doesn’t say a word as he hauls ass the few short blocks to Kate’s.
Fire trucks, ambulances, and cop cars make it impossible to get near her home. I leap from the truck and take off sprinting. The once-quaint home blazes in a fiery inferno.
“Hey, get back here,” someone yells. I don’t stop until I’m in the middle of the chaos screaming for answers.
It’s as if no one hears my cries for help. They go unanswered. Dad is at my side doing the same, but we get nothing. It feels like an eternity before a police officer even acknowledges our presence.
“There was a woman in there. Has she been found?” Dad asks, getting right up in his face.
The officer shakes his head. “I can’t tell you anything, sir…”
I cut him off. “She’s my girlfriend. I know she was in there. Are you searching for her?”
Four gunshots pop into the night air. At first, I think it’s the house crumbling, but I’d know a gunshot anywhere. I grab my dad and duck, then realize they are too far away for them to be any danger.
“The two suspects are down.” The announcement streams from the officer’s radio. “Shot to kill when one fired off a gun of their own.”
The officer presses his mic. “It’s confirmed there’s one individual in the house. I repeat, it’s confirmed there’s one individual in the house.”
“We’ve got our men in there. Only a few more minutes before I pull them.”
Dad grabs a firefighter racing by. “Sam, who’s in there? Have they found her? Is there any communication?”
He shakes his head. “Cody busted in there.”
The grim look on his face tells us everything we need to know.
Chapter 21
Kate
“He’s a good boy.”
I blink once then twice.
“I was a horrible mother. Hurt him worse than anything possibly could. But he’s found you and Jessie and Jules. Even though I was evil, God answered my prayers. I just wanted my baby boy protected because I know I was nothing but evil.”
“Who are you?”
“Max’s momma.”
“Kate, can you hear me?” I’m being lifted up. “Kate, can you hear me?”
They need to stop screaming at me. I just want to sleep. I open my mouth to tell them so, only to find there’s no oxygen left in my lungs.
***
Max
I pace the halls. Energy flows through me. After the six-hour drive to the hospital where Cody and Kate were life-flighted, I can’t sit still. Dad hasn’t moved from where he’s been leaning up against a wall.
“We don’t have a pulse,” are the last words I heard when Kate was put in the back of the ambulance.
No one here will give me any kind of information since I’m not next of kin. I’ve kept my stare on the doors leading to the operating rooms. The sun has risen and is threatening to go back down with no word on the condition of either of them.
I FaceTime with Finn, giving him the tiniest of details. All he knows is Kate had an accident and that I have to be with her. Only if I can be with her.
At that moment, the doors swing wide open. I’m bound and determined to get answers, no matter the cost.
“Kate. I need to know about Kate Wilson-Valentukonis. I’m her fiancé. Her parents have been contacted but are out of the country with no cell service. She has no siblings. I’m all she has.”
The surgeon pulls the cap from his head and balls it in his hands while shaking his head. I feel my dad lift me up from the back because my legs go out on me. My world spins, and I’m throttled into darkness.
“Max.”
I hear my name but can’t come to.
“Max.” This time, a harsh slap accompanies my name, bringing me back.
“There you are, son. Jesus, don’t be doing that to me. She’s alive.”
I’m on my feet, wobbling from side to side.
“Sit back down.” Dad pushes me down. “She’s alive and recovering from surgery.”<
br />
“Surgery?”
Dad nods his head.
“I want all the details, now.”
“She was beaten badly. The doctors are guessing who ever did this…”
“Ally,” I interrupt.
“…figured she was dead.” Dad sits back down. “The cops told us the house was set on fire. Cody got to her in time.”
“Surgery,” I repeat again.
“Her jaw was broken, and she has a collapsed lung, traumatic damage to her abdomen, and severe swelling on her brain. She’s pulling through, Max. Her lungs are in the worst shape, from smoke inhalation and being collapsed.”
I’m unable to process any of it.
“Cody saved her life. Got to her in time.”
“Cody, Jesus.”
“You worry about one thing at a time.”
I nod, unable to blink from shock.
“You can go see her, Max.”
Dad guides me to the intensive care unit. The massive hospital bed swallows up Kate’s tiny figure. Tubes and wires go in every direction. A steady thumping sound beats in the room. Whooshing accompanies the sound as machines help Kate breathe.
I go to her side and crumble, clutching her hand.
“Kate, oh my God, Kate.”
Not one shred of anger courses through me at the thought this all happened at Ally’s hands. I’m brought to my knees clinging to Kate’s hand, and I pray like I’ve never prayed before. I repeat the words over and over.
I don’t leave her side. One day, then two, and eventually five pass by with no signs of improvement. I hold her hand the entire time, only leaving to use the bathroom and spend a few minutes with Finn in the waiting room.
Doctors grow more dismal as each day passes by. I can’t help it, but in the quiet times I stare at Kate’s belly. She was pregnant. Not that far along, but we had created a tiny miraculous life that was ripped away from us.
If Ally and her partner weren’t announced dead the night of the fire, I’d be pounding the pavement in search of her in order to take her life. I’d bathe my knuckles in their blood and feel no remorse at all. Their greed and addiction ruined so many lives. Ally’s fatal and final mistake of raising a gun and firing at an officer cost her life and the man she travelled with. It was nothing less than a blessing that officer only suffered a surface bullet wound.
“Son, Mom has dinner and Finn out in the waiting room. Go take a break.”
I don’t speak unless I have to, and this is a time I don’t. I have no more energy left to put on a happy all is good face for Finn. I’m a hollow man.
“Dad.” Finn runs up to me when I enter the room.
I hug him tight.
“Grandma said no, but…”
He started calling Jules “Grandma” over the last few days. Should make me happy as hell and proud, but it doesn’t.
“Finn,” Mom warns.
“But,” he continues, “I want to see Kate, please.”
“Do the hand thing and jump up and down,” Emma tries to whisper.
Finn follows her instructions. “I miss Kate. Please, Dad. I can tell her stories and remind her of all her students. It will work. She loves us.”
I scrub my face, not knowing what to tell him. Seeing Kate in this state will scar him forever. I don’t want his last memory of her being laid up in a bed, lifeless. He needs to remember the full of life, loving Kate who saved him.
“Dad, it will work.” He frantically nods his head.
The sheer hope in his words are foreign. It’s been missing since the day I saw her in that bed.
“Sure, why not?” I sit him down and go over what to expect and that Kate won’t talk back.
I squeeze his shoulders as I walk him back to the room. The nurses don’t kick Dad out, even though there’s a strict two-visitor policy.
“Lift me up, Dad.” Finn raises his arms.
He winces when Kate’s face comes into view. But he’s on a mission, wiggling out of my arms and settling on the bed next to Kate. He manages to lie down next to her, avoiding all the tubes. He pets her hair gently. I’m forced to turn away because this is the final straw that will break me.
“Oh, Miss Kate, I’m sorry about your face,” he coos to her. “Dad finally let me see you. I’ve been wanting to tell you things. First, I love you, Miss Kate. Second, will you be my mom? Third, you have to wake up or Mrs. Bradshaw will be our substitute for the rest of the year. She has warts and smells. She doesn’t like me. I don’t think she likes any of the kids. You have to wake up.”
I face my brave and courageous son, going to his side.
Finn perches up on his elbows. “Are you waking up?”
His face falls in a frown.
“I hate fairytales. They’re dumb. You know this, but Emma said Dad needs to kiss you like in Sleeping Beauty and you’ll open your eyes. Dad.” He looks up at me.
I find a smile dancing on my lips. “I got this.”
I bend down, whispering my love for Kate before sealing my lips to hers.
***
Kate
I hear you, Finn. I’m right here, trying hard to wake up. Oh, his sweet words have me fighting hard. Yes, I’ll be your mom. I want to scream. The harder I try to open my eyes, the more weight rests on them.
I’m here, Finn. I hear you. I repeat it over and over in my head. It’s been dark and cold forever. I feel his warmth seeping in and crave it like no other. Come on, body.
“I got this.” Max’s deep voice seeps in.
He whispers his love to me, then the warmth I’ve been seeking flows from my roots right down to my toes. I pray he never leaves. He’s bringing me back to life.
Something in my throat causes me to gag. I’m choking, coughing, and spluttering. My eyes fly open, and the light blinds me. I can’t breathe again. I panic, coughing harder and fighting to get just a gasp of air.
“She’s awake,” I hear someone yell. “She’s awake.”
Finn is a blur as he’s jerked away from the bed. Random faces stare down at me. In one swift movement, I’m able to take in air. I try to talk, but there are razor blades of some sort lining my throat.
I thrash in the bed, reaching for my boys, only to have my arms put back down by my side.
“I’m here, Mommy. We are here,” Finn’s sweet voice hollers out over the chaos. I focus on it while gulping in air.
They’re here.
I’m here.
Max’s mom’s prayers were answered.
Epilogue
“She’s fat.”
“She’s not fat. She’s growing my brother or sister.”
“And that’s why she’s fat.”
I peer through my legs at Emma and Finn debating over my body while I’m in my final yoga pose.
“She’s right, Finn. I’m fat. One big Butterball turkey of fat.”
“Emma Jane,” Jules hollers from the kitchen. “What did I tell you?”
“She’s not fat. She’s pregnant.”
Finn gives her a victorious “I told you so” head jerk. I go down to my knees and roll over on my back, exhausted from yoga and being nine months pregnant. Max told me there was no way in hell I’d be able to keep up with yoga all nine months, hence why I’m about to die.
I take a silent moment to smooth my hands over my belly. I was told conceiving and then being able to carry a baby to full-term would be impossible due to the trauma of being beaten, taking most of the brutal kicks to my stomach which caused internal damage and led to surgeries and scarring around my uterus. Not one inch of the flames touched me that horrific night. Cody was my shield.
“Get your busy butts in here and help finish the pies,” Jules hollers in her mean mom voice. “Let Kate have her moment of zen or whatever.”
I smile at the kids’ defeated looks. Emma hops right up, leaving her disaster of Legos behind. Finn chews on his bottom lip, debating his next move. He reaches for a block then scrunches his tiny fist together.
“Damn, tacos.” He huffs and
stands, joining his cousin.
She’s actually his aunt, but we’ve settled on them being cousins. We moved in with Jessie and Jules during the months I spent recovering. I pushed my body back, not wasting one second. I never finished out the school year teaching but still spend plenty of hours volunteering.
And even though it’s winter and there’re feet of snow outside, Max and Jessie are working on a house. Max picked his favorite spot on the farm and poured a foundation. Until the house is finished, we are living with Jessie and Jules. I have to admit, I have it made with Jules taking care of us. It’s going to be a rude awakening when I’m in charge of my own household.
We made a family decision to homeschool Finn and Emma. They both were being held back in the public school system, at no fault to anyone. Having essentially a classroom of two students is amazing and fun. We go at our own pace and even take long road trips learning about science and geography.
The chaos in the kitchen grows louder. I hear Jessie and Max enter. And then before I know it, Max stands above me.
“Rough day?” He smirks, knowing damn well I hate yoga at this point.
“Shut your mouth when you’re talking to me.”
He reaches out a hand, and I take it. It’s always my favorite part of the day when my hand is wrapped in his.
“Go shower, Jessie. Brady is picking up Cody and then heading here for dinner.”
“Then presents,” Emma squeals.
“Come wash my back,” Jessie responds to Jules.
Both kids squeal out their disgust, gaining a chuckle from Jessie.
Cody is still healing from his burns. He tends to crawl into himself. The bar is on the verge of closing, and he can’t seem to muster up one ounce of giving a shit. The thing is his family, us, won’t allow it. He gets dragged to everything he can handle. Hell, he even showed some excitement at Emma and Finn’s soccer game this fall. Well, that was until they were both politely asked to leave their team due to their lack of interest and Emma’s knack for starting arguments.
As Max helps me to my feet, the twinkle of the Christmas tree catches my attention. It’s truly the most magical time of the year. We’ve been blessed beyond belief. I used to think I was lucky. This, everything around me, has nothing to do with luck. I catch the twinkle of the angel on the top of the tree and repeat the same prayer I say every day for Cody and his soul.