Ashley shook her head. “No. No. I guess I didn’t want to bother you.”
“Like I said, you’re in for a few spankings. Here, let me brush out your hair. You shouldn’t pull it back unless he asks you to. Most Doms I know love their submissives’ hair down.” Karina grabbed Ashley’s brush and with a practiced hand began smoothing it out of the fussy bun she’d put it in.
“Why will he spank me for that? For saying I’m obnoxious, I mean. I’m not being rude to anyone by saying that.”
“You’re being rude to yourself. Doms don’t like submissives to insult themselves. It’s more than that. When you told me you were sure I had something better to do, you weren’t being honest. You have to say what you mean in this lifestyle, honey. Communication, trust, honesty, they’re very important here. It’s why I come here to relax. No one is going to lie to me. I spend all day with people lying to me. It becomes tiresome.”
“I wasn’t really lying. I guess I didn’t know how to say what I wanted to say. I don’t even know what I wanted to say.”
Karina stared at her in the mirror. “Sure you did. Think about it.”
She forced herself to still, to really think for a second. What had she meant? She certainly hadn’t meant to drive Karina away. She was nice. So what should she say to someone nice? When she shoved aside all her self-doubting crap, what was really in her heart? “I guess I wanted to say thank you. For the hug. I needed it.”
“There you go. And you’re welcome. See? Isn’t that better than playing some game?”
It was actually. She had a running commentary of the world around her in her head twenty-four seven, but it wasn’t until she really thought that she realized what she wanted to say. “I’m sorry. I’m not used to people being so kind to me.” She sighed sadly at that thought. “That feels really nice.”
In the mirror, she could see the way Karina smiled. “Well, I think Charlotte Taggart got rid of the last mean girl, so you should be good here.”
She let her eyes drift closed as Karina ran the brush through her hair in long strokes. Her mother hadn’t spent time with her like this. Only Jill had ever really shown her affection, and she’d left for Dallas after Ashley graduated from high school. Maybe if someone had brushed her hair when she was a kid, she wouldn’t have turned to Trevor for affection. She often thought she should have taken Jill up on her offer to go to the city with her, but by then she was dating Trevor. “So why do people lie to you at work?”
“I’m a private investigator. Everyone lies to me. Cheating spouses, bail jumpers, hell, the people who hire me tend to lie. And I won’t even go into the cops. They don’t tend to lie, but they do give me hell from time to time.”
Karina’s life sounded far more interesting than her own. “So you come here to get away from all of it?”
“As much of it as I can. One of my loving cops is a Dom here. Now I’m the one being sarcastic. Derek Brighton kind of, sort of hates me. Which is a shame because I really like him. He’s the smartest man I know, and he’s got crazy good instincts. It doesn’t hurt that he’s the tiniest bit gorgeous. Oh, well, we can’t always get what we want. I work for Tag from time to time. He’s tried to hire me on, but I’m afraid this old dog prefers to work for herself.”
Ashley let her eyes open. “Now who’s going to get a spanking?”
Her laughter was rich and deep. “Yes, honey, but I promise I’ll like it. I think I’m going to play with the Brit tonight.”
“The raging murder machine?”
“No, the sweet one. Simon. He’s a charmer. Easy on the eyes, too. And I don’t have to worry that he’ll want to sleep with me afterward.” She winked in the mirror. “He’s pining for someone. I’m pining for someone. It’s a match made in heaven.”
“So I really don’t have to have sex with him. With my Dom, I mean.” Charlotte had been plain. The contract she’d signed stated that she got to choose.
“It’s always your choice, hon.” Karina stepped back. “There. You look lovely. So this isn’t your dream guy, huh?”
Keith. Tall, dark, incredibly handsome. He would be her dream guy. But she didn’t dream anymore. “No. I’m not interested in finding a boyfriend. I am interested in finding me.”
It was what she was doing, and it scared her to death.
Karina turned her chair around and gave her another of those mama bear hugs that made Ashley feel like someone gave a crap about her. She didn’t hesitate this time. She hugged her back.
“Good for you, baby girl.” Karina’s lovely face had flushed, and she nodded as though she needed a moment. “If he gives you any trouble, you call me. I’ll take care of him. And if you have any questions, you can call me, too.”
“And if I just want a friend?” The question popped out before she could think about it. Dumb. That was dumb and made her sound needy.
Karina nodded. “You better call me, because I could use one, too. Now, let’s get out there and meet this Dom of yours.”
Ashley hopped off the chair. She was short compared to Karina in her heels, but it didn’t matter. She spent so much of her life cutting herself off from everyone. Maybe that was a mistake. Maybe this was. She would never know if she didn’t try. She might never know who she was and if she didn’t know that, how the hell could she guide her daughter through life? “You’ll go with me?”
She’d thought she would be alone since Jill wasn’t here.
“Of course.” Karina’s hand slipped into hers. “We subs stick together. Isn’t that right, ladies?”
Serena looked up from her computer. She settled her hand on her large baby bump. “Absolutely. Ashley, you look so cute. You’re going to have to tell me how you managed to get your butt back after the baby because I’m pretty sure they’re going to have to stamp ‘wide load’ across mine.”
Avery’s eyes flared. “I’m telling Jake you said that.”
“Hush, Saint Avery,” Serena shot back with affection. “Don’t listen to her. She’s really too good to be true. Poor Li. He never gets to spank her.”
“Sure he does. I mouth off sometimes just to have fun.” She smiled at Ashley, her pretty face beaming. It was hard to believe she was married to the big Irish man who looked so tough and mean in his leathers, but she’d watched how he softened the minute his wife walked in the room. “And Karina’s right. We subs stick up for each other. Well, mostly we hide behind Charlotte or Karina and let them totally stick up for us. They’re really good at yelling at people.”
That was nice to know.
“Welcome to the club, Ashley.” Serena gave her a thumbs-up.
For the first time in a long time, she wondered if she might find a home.
* * *
Keith took a deep breath and told himself this was another meeting. He met with tons of potential clients, every one of them basically begging for money and attention. He was excellent at picking out the projects that would pay off brilliantly.
He didn’t need this to pay, just to be pleasurable for a couple of weeks, a month or two at most. That was all he needed. He would see she was like all the rest. He would find the exchange that made everything all right, the books balanced.
“Now you’re in for it.” A broad man in leathers shook his closely cropped head as he leaned against the bar. They’d been introduced by Taggart in the locker room. He was some sort of cop. Derek Brighton. Seemed nice enough.
“How so?” Maybe some small-talk would take his mind off the fact that he was about to spend the evening with a woman who shouldn’t give him the time of day.
But she’d signed the contract. She knew what she was getting into, and she’d agreed to keep everything at the club.
He didn’t have to feel guilty. It was a game. Nothing more than play.
“Because I think that’s your girl, right? She’s with the mama bear of the subs. Name’s Karina Mills, and she can castrate a man at fifty paces.” Brighton chuckled, but there was a bitterness underneath it. “She’s beautiful but d
eadly, man. You might want to watch your step if she’s taking Ashley under her wing.”
Keith turned and caught sight of a tall woman with black hair and a nice body. She didn’t really look like a man-eater, but then he knew enough about women that he couldn’t judge that book by its lovely cover.
Oh, but he could judge Ashley. His gut did a weird turn that probably came from the fact that every ounce of blood in his body had pounded straight into his dick at the sight of her.
She was wearing a white corset and a denim miniskirt that showed off her spectacular curves. Fat? God, he knew Taggart had been baiting him, but he would kill the next man who said the word around her. She was glorious, so fuckable it hurt. Nice breasts, a curvy waist, hips he could grip while he fucked into what was likely a petal-soft pussy.
“Dude, are you trying to give her the upper hand?” Brighton pulled him out of his thoughts.
“Fuck.” He turned quickly because she would probably run away if she saw how massive his dick had gotten.
“Hey, it’s okay. Unless she doesn’t like big cocks. Then you’re in trouble. Sorry, it’s kind of hard to miss. You might want to get that under control.” Brighton turned with him, a smirk on his face. “I don’t know many women who run at the sight of a big cock these days. Hell, women these days can be as aggressive as any man. I got hit on during a murder investigation a couple of months back. Seriously. I was glad I turned her down.”
“She was the murderer?”
“Oh, yeah. Killed her boyfriend with a pickaxe. Pretty girl. Crazy as shit. Sometimes I love my job. It’s fun.” He took a drag off his beer. “Joe?”
The bartender stepped up. “Sir?”
“Who’s she playing with tonight?” Derek’s mouth tightened, letting Keith know he was really interested in the answer to that question.
“Really, Lieutenant? You ask that every single night. Why don’t you play with her yourself?” Joe rolled his eyes.
“Do you need some discipline? I didn’t ask for advice. Come on, man.”
Joe sighed. “Weston. You have got to stop this thing with her. It’s sad. You two watch each other with pathetic puppy eyes but you never talk.”
“The last time we talked she damn near took off my head and I threatened to get her run out of the state, so no, we don’t play together. And I don’t have puppy eyes. I have full grown dog eyes, thank you. Like pit bull eyes. Yeah.” Derek put his beer down. “Well, I can pay the Brit back. I’m scheduled to work on Charlotte’s sister. Now the Brit’s got puppy dog eyes for that one.”
Sanctum seemed to be a living soap opera, but then he’d never been to a club that wasn’t. It paid to know who was sleeping with whom, who wanted to sleep with whom, and which Doms were most likely to throw down. In his job, Keith dealt in information. Despite the fact that this wasn’t work, he’d never been able to shut down that part of himself that liked to know everything.
Like the fact that Ashley was living with her sister in a guesthouse. She was trying to juggle school and work and a baby.
She was vulnerable and had zero idea of how to protect herself from a man like him.
She’d signed the contract and if he walked away because his conscience was bugging him, she would find another Dom. Yes. He could play it that way. He should handle her or someone else would.
Ashley walked into the bar with the woman Derek had called Karina. She wore sky-high heels and towered over Ashley, who was barefoot.
“Hello, Sir.” She didn’t quite meet his eyes.
Keith reached out to touch her chin, tilting her face up so she was forced to look at him. Such clear eyes. She wouldn’t know how to lie to him. “Hello, Ashley. We’re going to be casual tonight. In the future, I will expect a much more formal greeting.”
“The knees thing?” Ashley asked, biting her bottom lip in a way that made his dick twitch.
She was so innocent. She’d had a baby, but there was still an innocence to her. He’d married Lena when she was younger than Ashley, but he doubted either one of them had been quite as naïve as she seemed. Or maybe he was fooling himself because they’d both been idiot kids who hadn’t been able to handle the truth.
He went a little shaky at the thought. He never let Lena in anymore. And absolutely never let…
“Why don’t you show her?” Derek said, stepping up. He put a hand on Keith’s shoulder, an obvious show of support.
God, had he gone green or something? Whatever, he was grateful to the detective for giving him a minute to get his composure back.
Karina frowned the detective’s way. “What? Do you really expect me to get on my knees in front of you?”
A single brow climbed on Derek’s forehead and his eyes narrowed. “I understand you don’t have a lot of respect for me in the real world, but you could show some decorum in here. I didn’t ask you to submit to me. I simply asked you to show a woman who seems to be your friend how a submissive properly greets her Dom in this club.”
The temperature had dropped about twenty degrees and Ashley absolutely wasn’t paying attention to him anymore. She was staring from Derek to Karina and back, her eyes wide.
Karina turned to Ashley, giving her a wink as though to defuse the very tense situation between herself and the detective. “Okay, so you and Master Keith will want to go over his particular preferences, but when you first greet him, you’ll want to show you give him your submission.”
She gracefully fell to her knees, her legs spreading wide. Her breasts looked lovely as she squared her shoulders and allowed her head to dip submissively down, her hair falling in long, glossy tresses.
And the detective was suddenly very happy to see her, too. Keith quickly averted his eyes. Even in a club, it was kind of rude to stare at another dude’s erection, but the detective had been right. It was hard to miss.
Derek frowned and readjusted his leathers, muttering under his breath. “Hey, you’re not the only one with problems.” He stepped forward. “I prefer your hands on your thighs and knees a bit wider.”
Keith smiled, happy to not be the only one with issues. Karina’s whole body tightened, her anger plain, but she spread her legs wider and her hands moved to her thighs, balancing her neatly.
Despite her calm, it was easy to see that she was one pissed-off sub.
It was suddenly easy to reach out to Ashley. He offered his hand.
Ashley hesitated for a moment and then placed her palm in his. He drew her close, letting his free hand find her waist.
“I don’t know if I’m as flexible as Karina,” Ashley said, her eyes not leaving the other sub. She leaned into him as though affection was her default state.
It wasn’t his. In the twelve years since his divorce, he’d had very little affection. He’d had sex, for sure, but no one had cuddled up to him and rested her cheek against his chest because she was nervous and he was supposed to provide her with support.
“We’ll work on it,” he promised. “I don’t expect perfection ever. I’m far from it.”
Her face turned up, a grin lighting her lips, and he had to catch his breath. “Good, because I’m not real great with perfection.”
His worry was back again because unfortunately, she seemed far too perfect to him.
Chapter Three
Ashley stared at the couple on the stage so she wouldn’t get caught with all of her focus on the man beside her.
Keith was far past beautiful. God, she’d thought he looked good in a suit. He looked ridiculously hot in leather pants and a vest that did little to cover his cut chest. Everything about the man was muscular and lean.
What the hell was he doing with her?
She stared ahead as Simon Weston used a single-tail on Karina.
“Do you see how she relaxed?” Keith whispered in her ear. His arm was around her waist and her skin felt lit up where he touched her.
How long had it been since she’d come alive under a man’s hand?
Had she ever?
“Yes.”
She studied Karina. About twenty strokes in, she’d taken a long breath and she’d relaxed on the St. Andrew’s Cross.
But there had been a weird disconnect between her and the Dom working her over. Simon Weston was one of the nicest men Ashley had met since she’d started working at Sanctum. He was always polite and had a ready smile for her. He ordered tea as often as he ordered something with liquor, and when she’d gone out of her way to make sure it had been properly prepared, he’d praised her wholeheartedly. Still, she thought Karina had more of a connection with the detective who seemed to ruffle her every feather.
Even now, Derek Brighton was watching, his face dark as Weston flicked the whip and Karina’s head sagged.
“Do you understand the term subspace?”
She turned to Keith slightly. “I know it sounds like heaven.”
Some subs talked about it the way vanilla people talked about orgasms. It was a place where nothing mattered but the feeling, where safety and pleasure were the only sensations. She was very interested in subspace, even if it was just a way to relax. She never relaxed anymore.
Keith’s low chuckle hummed along her neck. “I’ve heard it’s a bit like that. It’s an endorphin rush a sub gets from serving her Master, from pushing herself. I want to help you find that.”
“By spanking my ass.” She was the tiniest bit sarcastic. It seemed so odd to find pleasure from pain. She’d had so much pain in her life and gotten not an ounce of pleasure from it. It was hard to believe, but she trusted her sister and her sister had flourished in this lifestyle.
“I might have to start now if you decide to get a smart mouth.”
Something about how deep his voice got made her a little hot. More than a little. A lot.
“Step back and let’s have a talk,” he commanded.
She felt his hand tangle with hers and let him lead her back from the front of the stage toward the lounge area.
Modern Fairy Tale Page 101