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by Marie Reyes


  After his shower, he unpacked a little, and found his cleanest clothes whilst recapping the trip in his head. In a month he had seen it all. Meadows, wildflowers, lakes, rivers, and of course the most beautiful mountains. He remembered the grizzly bear that crossed his path and the other wildlife he had encountered along the way: moose, porcupines, pine martens, and marmots. One thing he would not miss, was the mosquitoes and flies. He had grown tired of bushwhacking, forging his way through dense undergrowth, with wet leaves and branches brushing past him as if he were walking through a car wash.

  The sun was too hot, the rain and hail too cold, the lightning made him feel like he could be struck down at any second. What was so wrong with wanting a warm bed and some home comforts? Why did giving up feel so wrong?

  When he had left for the hike, he worried he had avoided the outdoors so long, that he wouldn't be able to cope, until it dawned on him, he didn't get agoraphobic in nature, it was as if people and civilization was his real fear. Now, it had become the opposite. The hotel was comforting and familiar, with many a distraction. It wasn't the bears or wolves that scared him; it was being left alone with his thoughts.

  ~~~

  Jasper, like Whistler, reminded him of a theme park. Everything looked a little too perfect. From the outdoor seating area, he could still see the mountains as the sun disappeared behind them. He knew the sun was setting on his adventure, and a bittersweet pang of nostalgia plucked at his heartstrings.

  After drinking his weight in Gatorade, he was now enjoying something a little stronger. This had probably been the longest he had gone without drinking in a good while. The burly, bearded server walked towards him with a plate and placed it on the table. It was a double cheeseburger with fries and a side of onion rings, and he had no doubt, he was going to finish the lot. Now he had done everything he had to do for the day, he connected to Wi-Fi for the first time since he had set off on his trek. Eating and browsing the internet was a skill he had perfected, and the sight of all his notifications popping up on screen was a rush.

  Pickletubs118: Anyone about? Come on. We can't give up. We can't let him win.

  Pickletubs118: Anyone?

  Pickletubs118: I'm going to do this alone then.

  There was another message, a private message. It was sent only days ago by Pipes.

  Pipes1983: Martin. I hope things are looking up after what happened to you. I'm so sorry about our last conversation. You said something to me that upset me and I should have been there for you in the worst moment, but there were things I couldn't face then. When I started drinking far too much, I fell asleep with a lit cigarette and started a fire. I woke up in time, and managed to get my family out, but I never got over what I had done.

  When you told me what happened, it brought it all back. I was terrified that it was the killer we'd been following and that he knew what I had done, and that's why he did what he did to you. I own the fact that this horrible thing that happened to you could be my fault, and I didn't want to admit it to you at the time.

  After they threatened my children, I cut myself off from them, and they even moved state to live with my ex's new partner. Now I feel that they are safe, I'm going to do everything I can to try to find this person. I got a response from the seller of that clock. She wouldn't give me their info, and the police don't seem to think it's worth pursuing. I have to do this. Otherwise, this will all have been for nothing. Me alienating my kids and ex even further to the point where they moved away. I would love to catch up and discuss, but I understand if you don't want to.

  Quicky_Mart: Amazing to hear from you. I'm in Jasper at the moment. I hiked most of the Great Divide Trail. It was really beautiful. I'm sure you would have loved it. I have got insurance money, so it's going to be okay. If what you're saying is true, and this fucker burnt my parent's house down, then I wholeheartedly want to take them down and would gladly help you.

  Chapter

  Twenty Four

  LONDON

  "Don't you think it's time we moved in together. It seems silly that we're renting two places. Not exactly cost-effective living in London, is it? I don't suppose you've considered moving away?" Nadia sprung this question far too early on a Monday morning as she got ready for work.

  Waiting for his response, she spooned yogurt into a bowl, followed by a sprinkling of muesli and a dollop of homemade fruit compote. She picked up a spoon and turned to him. "So? What do you think?"

  "Uh. Um. I guess I hadn't really thought about it. I'm just going to make a bacon sarnie and have a think." He tried to buy himself time to come up with a suitable answer. He already knew what he wanted to say, but how could he answer without hurting her feelings and starting another argument.

  "What's there to think about? You either do, or you don't. It's simple really."

  Aadesh pulled a pack of bacon from the fridge. "You really want me to move away from London and make that decision in a single morning? Come on Nadia." He tore the plastic lid off the pack of bacon with force.

  "I know you seem to be obsessed with the place, but what's so good about it? Everything is overpriced. Getting to work is a nightmare. It's alright for you. You lounge around the house all day."

  "There are way more opportunities here. What about my career?"

  "Come on. I think career is a bit of an overstatement. You play small time gigs and make coffee on the side."

  Aadesh remained silent, as if he spoke, he knew he would say something he regretted. Instead, he placed rashers of bacon into a frying pan.

  "Please don't sulk. There's just a time in your life where you just have to... grow up. We can't all be famous television comedians, and rock stars. I mean, how does it feel knowing how much more I earn than you? Don't you want to be successful rather than chasing a fantasy your entire life?"

  "I really don't think it's that fantastical an ambition. Not if I'm dedicated and do what it takes." He flinched as a drop of hot oil spat from the pan onto his arm. She pushed her bowl aside. "You not having your breakfast? Jealous of my sandwich?" He tried changing the subject.

  "I'm not hungry."

  "Who's the one sulking now?"

  "I'm not sulking. I'm just... fed up. Fed up of being the only one trying to make something of this, while you sit in your pants every day playing computer games."

  "Exaggerate much?"

  "No, not at all. I just see things for what they are."

  "Fine. If that's the case, what the hell are you still doing with me? All you do is try to change me. I think it's pretty clear now that this just... doesn't work."

  "What? We're just having a simple adult discussion here. Why are you being so immature and defensive?"

  If he didn't say it now, whilst heated and with a false courage that came from being mid-argument, then he would never say it. "I think we both know this isn't working. We just need to cut our losses."

  "No. Come on Addy. I didn't mean to push you, I just wanted more for us." There was something about her eyes when she was upset that made him melt. He couldn't let that sway him this time.

  "You deserve to be happy. I honestly don't know why you keep pushing for us, even though we have nothing in common."

  "You know what they say. Opposites attract. It's true."

  "Attraction isn't enough and you know it."

  "You can't do this to me, not now. I have a whole day at work ahead of me. How am I supposed to get through the day?"

  "Call in sick. Have a me day. try to figure out what you really want. What would make you fulfilled, it's just not me."

  "Call in sick, of course you would say that. You have the work ethics of a sloth."

  "Okay." He didn't want to engage any longer. They were getting nowhere.

  "My friends were right about you," she said with a spiteful look in her eyes.

  "Well, they'll be happy to be proven right then."

  "You parents will be devastated. They welcomed me into your family with open arms. You're not going to do better than me
you know."

  "Okay."

  "Stop saying okay! You're infuriating." She grabbed her bag from the kitchen table and stormed to the door. "You're going to regret this. Don't come crawling back to me when you realize what a mistake you've made," and with that, she slammed the door behind her.

  Despite the excess adrenaline and the fact he was shaking, he felt truly relieved. It was over. There was no way he could eat now his stomach was tied in knots. After staring into space for five minutes, he received a text message from Nadia.

  Nadia: "I'm sorry I insulted you. It was the heat of the moment. Can we talk about this when I get home?"

  Aadesh ignored the message for the time being and looked at the most recent message on the group.

  K-meister: Shortstacks and Pickletubs118. Quicky_Mart and Pipes1983 were arranging to meet, so I invited them to stay with me in Chicago. Thought it would be cool to see each other in the flesh, and we can go over the case. I appreciate you live in London Aadesh, but I would gladly contribute towards your flight if you are interested. And you of course Pickletubs, but not sure where you live.

  Shortstacks: I'm so in. Now's the perfect time. No shows booked, and just split up with my girlfriend. TMI I know.

  K-meister: Sorry to hear that. You can PM me details of any flights that would be best for you. The others are coming on Friday next week.

  Pickletubs118: I can't. Sorry.

  K-meister: Well, if you change your mind let me know.

  Pickletubs118: I can't. My mom won't let me, and I have school.

  K-meister: How old are you?

  Pickletubs118: Thirteen.

  Aadesh almost spit out a mouthful of tea.

  Shortstacks: You're thirteen years old?

  Pickletubs118: Yes. Please don't block me. I want to see what happens.

  Shortstacks: Maybe we can video message you when we all get there.

  Aadesh thought it was probably inappropriate, but he couldn't help to remember what he was like at that age. He liked to be included, treated like the adults. It was not what he had expected, and it just went to show you can never know what to expect when meeting someone online.

  Part Two

  Chapter

  Twenty Five

  CHICAGO

  It was probably the strangest and most spontaneous thing he had done in his entire life. One day, he was arguing with his girlfriend, and the next, he was in a stranger's car in Chicago trying to catch her father's murderer with two other random people he had met online. He'd always wanted to go to America but had never got around to it.

  "Thanks for coming. I know it's unlikely we will find this person, but there's something about having you here. It feels right. You understand. My friends have told me what I'm doing is unhealthy, as if they wouldn't do the same if it was them." Kristen adjusted the rear-view mirror.

  "My ex thought I was nuts. She actually banned me from the forum, like I'm thirteen or something. I can't believe Pickletubs is thirteen, he didn't seem it, did he?"

  "I didn't think so." She started switching between radio stations as if she couldn't stop moving. The traffic was at a standstill but they both had nervous energy desperate to be released.

  "So, what's Piper and Martin like?"

  "Nice. Funny, in a cynical sort of way."

  "Sorry to break it to you, but cynical is my jam too."

  "I always believed that most people were good. I was a positive person, but after what happened. I just feel like, I'm so distrusting now, and so angry." The car finally started moving again.

  ~~~

  Kristen parked the car in a leafy green neighborhood. "So, this is where I live."

  Aadesh couldn't take his eyes off the detached house with red brick exterior. "You own this?" As part of generation rent, Aadesh looked at her home with envy.

  Once in the hallway, he took his shoes off. This place looked like the sort of place where people took their shoes off, not like his flat where the ten-year-old carpet was well worn and covered in all sorts of stains left behind from the student that lived there before.

  "Make yourself at home. Anything you want, just ask." She gestured towards the living room where Piper and Martin were watching television. They both got up as he approached and offered hugs.

  "So nice to meet you." Aadesh looked them over. When you speak to someone who you cannot see, you invent an image of them in your head. You see a face, hair color, mannerisms. The avatars he had created for them couldn't be further from the reality. He saw Kristen as a blond, and Piper as a brunette, but it was the opposite. He was expecting Martin to be geeky like he was, but he had that chiseled, outdoorsy look. He got every detail wrong, down to everyone's eye color.

  "The spare room is taken now so you'll have to sleep on the couch if that's okay?"

  "Are you kidding? Your couch is bigger than my whole flat. It'll be like staying at the Ritz in comparison."

  "Alrighty then. Can I get you a drink?"

  "A water please."

  "Coming right up. Let me show you where everything is in the kitchen. I got some tea at the store. You Brits love tea, right? Or is that just a stereotype?"

  "It's a stereotype because it's true."

  "I have loads of soft drinks too. Or beer. Just keep in mind Piper is tee-total so you might want to be subtle with it."

  "I don't drink much. Only to gain some Dutch courage when I go on stage."

  "I can't believe you're a comedian, that's so cool."

  "People are always kinda surprised when I tell them. They're like, 'but you're not funny.' "

  She laughed. "Sometimes it must be like a persona, I guess. The you onstage and the real you. Not that I'm saying you're not funny. Anyway, I've got something to show you. I wanted to wait until everyone got here. You can wait in the living room with the others. Oh, and the downstairs bathroom is the one left past the living room."

  Aadesh couldn't believe how at home he felt already. Kristen had cultivated a friendly, comfortable atmosphere.

  "Kristen is just getting something to show us," he said to the others. The armchair, two-seater and three-seater couches had been brought together and there were cushions and blankets everywhere. The setup reminded him of building forts when he was younger. "Loving the setup."

  "I know. It's awesome. Kristen's awesome. We all stayed up watching movies and eating junk food. Felt like a sleepover. I felt like a kid again," Martin said with a blanket over his legs and his head propped up with a cushion.

  "I think we should name it adult fort sofa construction ™," Aadesh offered.

  "I like it. You gonna sit down?" Martin asked.

  "Here it is guys." Kristen lumbered in with a huge corkboard and turned it to face them. It was covered in snippets and pictures, pins and pieces of string linking them all together.

  "Wow. You've been busy." Aadesh was impressed. It looked like something from the conspiracy theory videos he watched on YouTube. There was a picture of her father, Bryony Finch, and the unknown third target. She had printed anything she could find on them and pinned it to the board.

  "What I want to do tomorrow, if you're all okay with it, is to go to the murder scene of the second victim. I know the police already searched the place from top to bottom, but you never know. Maybe the killer left something."

  "Oh crap. You might want to check your cell phones people."

  "Why?" Aadesh hadn't connected to Kristen's Wi-Fi yet.

  "Can I cast my phone to your television?" Martin asked.

  "Sure."

  The group page appeared on-screen, showing a new message containing a link. It was a different username than the one that had been used previously.

  Theblackpill: You just couldn't keep away, could you? Looks like I will need to dispatch of my subject quicker than anticipated. Don't feel bad though, at least there will be less femoid roastie on the planet. Enjoy. www.videosharequickupload.com/femoidroastiereadytopay.mp4

  Martin opened up the link, and everyone sat upright. The v
ideo only lasted a few seconds. It was the girl from the most recent video, except now she wasn't comfortable at home, she was tied up somewhere dark, another abandoned site. Martin played the video again and paused it.

  "Did we do this? Is it our fault?" Piper looked on the verge of tears.

  Martin placed an arm around her. "You know he would have done this anyway. He'd already done it twice before." Piper gave him a weak smile. "What the hell is a femoid roastie?"

  Aadesh looked up the term now he was connected to the Wi-Fi. "Um, you probably don't want to know."

  "Tell us." Kristen's voice rose an octave.

  "Apparently a femoid is a dehumanizing term that incels use to describe women."

  "What the hell is an incel? Is anyone speaking English here?" Kristen looked at him in confusion.

  "Involuntary celibate. Basically, guys who can't get laid."

  "Then what's a roastie?"

  Aadesh coughed awkwardly as he considered a delicate way of putting it. "They believe that the more sex a woman has, the more...like...roast beef their labia is." He knew from the burning feeling in his cheeks he was blushing profusely.

  "Wow. I wonder why they don't get laid when they act like that."

  "Give 'em a break. They've probably never seen one before, how are they supposed to know?" Aadesh meant it as a joke, but no one was laughing.

  "Does the username mean anything?" Kristen asked.

  "Black pill. I think it's something to do with the Matrix, right? They think they're enlightened or something."

  Martin was also doing research with his cell phone screen projected on the television.

  Truthspeaker: It finally happened. I've gone my own way but continued to gymcel and it happened. This shallow Becky actually asked me out. I got to reject her, and it felt amazing. I'm taking the power back. My simp of a friend was like, why did you say no? He wouldn't get it. He's cucked big time. Probably going to cut him off. We can't go anywhere without his femoid coming along. Pathetic.

 

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