by Emery Hale
I saw out the corner of my eye that Quinn was blinking rapidly, trying to stop the tears. She was the closest to Willow, they spent every waking moment together, as the Technical Response and the Carrier worked closely. It didn’t help that Willow was the youngest out of all of us.
‘We should go back.’ Grace spoke up, the pearls around her neck glinting in the sunlight as she slowly went to stand, but Quinn rapidly shook her head.
‘No we can’t, I can’t go back there, not yet.’ Her hands clenched and eyes shimmered like glass, while her lips trembled like flowers in a thunderstorm.
So many words going unsaid seemed to strike lighting within her, all the rain and torment of emotions caving in on the poor girl. Through all this, however, there was a blatant fact: Quinn wasn’t scared of punishments, and she wasn’t scared of Harkness. She wasn’t afraid of what was there, she was petrified of what wasn’t.
I didn’t think the full weight of what happened had sunk in with the rest of the team, myself included. Maybe it would hit home the moment we got back. Willow wasn’t sitting on the couch studying or writing a report, she wasn’t curled up in bed and she wasn’t dancing around the house.
Willow was in a morgue, in a freezer.
Even as the facts were in front of me, no tears sprung to my eyes. No emotions bubbled to the surface – what was wrong with me? Who doesn’t cry at things like this? Maybe I was in some sort of denial?
‘Grace is right, Quinn, we can’t stay here. Besides, it won’t make it any easier if we disobey.’ Lily stood from her chair, the metal scraping against the hard ground. ‘We need to get out of here, I can’t stand all the noise.’
‘I just want a minute,’ Quinn begged, her eyes pleading to the girl in front of her.
The rest of the team had dealt with situations like this before, we all came from military or secret service families, somehow Quinn had managed to avoid it all.
‘We need to go, I’m not being late cause of you,’ Lily countered, shaking her head at the quivering girl beside me, who looked unmovable.
Lily grew tired of Quinn’s antics and lunged over the table, grabbing her arm.
My hand shot out, clenching hers tightly and, just for the hell of it, twisting a little, so the small sensation of pain would make her stop and think.
‘Lily. Don’t you dare,’ I said in a low voice. She of all people knew what small moves like that could do to a person.
Although it wasn’t my voice that made her stop, it was the moment our eyes connected, and even if it was only for a second, it was enough for her to back down.
Lily snatched her wrist back from me, massaging it gently with her other hand as she sat down. Sloppily at first, but then she returned to the default position; legs tilted to one side and hands clasped.
When I turned to Quinn, however, irritation ran through me at her state.
‘Well done Lils,’ I snapped, my brows furrowing. ‘We’re supposed to keep a low profile so how we’re going to get back without everyone staring at her shaking, I don’t know.’ She always had to cross the line, didn’t she.
‘People always stare,’ said Lily.
‘Lily, for once shut up,’ Grace interrupted; she looked way past done with the situation and I doubted Lily was helping.
‘Oh don’t even start, Grace. They are staring right now. Three o’clock. Excessively skimpy shorts, strappy crop tops, hoop earrings and basic bitch coffee,’ Lily listed, sitting forward in her chair.
‘That’s what you’ve been focusing on?’ Grace shook her head in disappointment. ‘You shouldn’t be doing surveillance right now.’
‘What, because this conversation is so riveting?’ she asked, but there was no response, no one was in the mood for a petty reply. ‘So what do we have? Tall blonde with hair extensions and the girl with dark hair . . . looks like her thong is on fire.’
I followed Lily’s line of sight and suddenly, all the weight that had been pressing into my lungs simply lifted. All the tension and frustration disappeared as soon as I caught sight of her: the one person who didn’t judge like Lily, worry like Quinn or lecture like Grace.
The one person who didn’t know the real me. Naomi Jade.
She didn’t and never would know about the Academy – as far as she was concerned, I got a scholarship and that was the end of it. Well . . . it was supposed to be. When we joined the first thing we were supposed to do was cut ties with everybody that wasn’t related to Government intelligence. I may or may not have completely ignored that rule.
‘Jess,’ Grace said, catching my attention, her hazel eyes filled with certainty, ‘you can’t, you know that.’
‘I’m sorry, you actually know the all-star cast of Mean Girls?’ Lily asked, looking back to the group who talked in a huddle.
I couldn’t catch any glimpses of Naomi and that worried me a little. What were they talking about? Was she OK?
‘That’s Naomi, the one that doesn’t want to be here,’ Grace answered for me.
I needed to tell her about Willow, I needed to vent. Talk to someone who wasn’t an agent, a Government official or a psychiatrist. I turned back to my group when I heard Lily let out a short laugh as she followed my gaze, shaking her head in amusement.
‘Hold up – fire thong is Naomi, the Naomi?’ Oh great, here we go. ‘She’s . . . well, for a start I thought she would be smaller.’
I etched my fingers into the table, biting my lip as I considered the three variables:
1. Risk a security breach so I could talk to my childhood friend who I’ve not seen in nine months.
2. Get the team and leave immediately, go back to the Academy and say no more about it.
3. Call her later and explain everything.
‘Can we just go home?’ Quinn asked, hiccupping a couple times before wiping away any stray tears.
If Quinn continued to cry we could pass it off as shock from the article, say they shared a class if anyone were to ask. Why was I like this? So cold . . . where were my emotions?
‘Yeah, come on you guys. There’s no point just sitting here,’ Grace said, pushing her coffee cup away, tucking a piece of stray hair behind her ear. ‘Not going to do us any good just –’
‘What no way – the show’s just getting started. My money’s on hair extensions with attitude.’ Lily announced, taking a sip of tea which I swear she’d poured whisky into.
When I looked over to the group I didn’t see a show, or any form of entertainment. All I saw was Katie Danvers’ hand clamped around Naomi’s arm, fear screaming from Naomi’s body as she tried to get away from the bitch.
I pushed off the seat, ready to break this up before it turned into the Katie show, but a warm clammy hand latched onto mine. Quinn squeezed gently, shaking her head.
‘You can’t, Jess, it’s protocol.’
Rules and regulations banged on in my head and I was already halfway back into my seat when Lily spoke.
‘Oh my God.’ Her voice was horrified.
I snapped my head back to see Katie run her hand through Naomi’s hair, but it wasn’t a gesture of endearment; they were dangerously close and Katie was in control. She was treating Naomi like a disobedient dog – what the fuck? Even strangers walking by stared in confusion, but no one moved to intervene.
Without even thinking I pushed the chair back, pulling my hand away from Quinn’s.
‘Jess, you can’t!’ Grace shouted after me.
My heels cracked on the concrete as I charged over – of course I still cared for Naomi, so any skank that thought they could treat my friend like property had another think coming.
‘Katie Danvers,’ I said with a smirk, stopping beside Naomi and slipping an arm around her shoulder, pulling her away from the Cara Delevingne wannabe.
I should really have walked away but there was part of me that wanted to punch that perfect little nose of hers so hard that it would reverse the nose job she got when she was sixteen.
‘I wasn’t aware you were still
in the country. I thought you’d be walking a catwalk in Milan or something but no . . . you’re here.’
I kept a straight face as I spoke, having one solo thought in my mind: whatever this girl spits out of her Botox-filled lips, she had it coming.
* * *
I turned swiftly, flipping my hair, and strutted away from the cowering creature that was the pitiful Katie. Even though I shouldn’t have wasted energy on the girl, it still felt amazing.
As I re-approached the coffee shop table however, I was met with three different expressions: from Lily there was a proud grin, from Quinn a look of sheer horror, while Grace gave a slow sarcastic clap, everyone’s eyes flitting to the scene behind me.
‘Well done. Great job there, subtle, real subtle.’ Grace shook her head but Lily just laughed.
‘I’m sorry but that was spectacular, did you actually stab your stiletto in her foot?’ Lily asked, her voice filled with excitement as she edged closer to me. ‘You did didn’t you? Oh fuck me, you did.’
The gravity of what I’d just done crashed through me like a wave; if anyone had recorded that it would flag up at the Academy.
‘I say Jess did the right thing.’
‘No I didn’t,’ I said pinching the bridge of my nose.
‘Jessica!’ shouted Naomi from behind.
I turned and saw her running towards us, then the memory hit me – I’d said I would get her coffee. Bloody coffee! What was I thinking? Truthfully, I wasn’t – one minute Katie was running her mouth then suddenly my heel was in her shoe.
‘You invited her over?’ Quinn asked shooting up and grabbing her bag.
‘What the hell was that?’ Naomi said, stopping beside me, her eyes wild. ‘Katie’s hurt and you just walked away!’
‘Sup fire thong.’ Lily said casually as she stared Naomi up and down with a satisfied smirk. ‘You need to relax.’
‘I’m sorry, what?’
‘You need to relax, blondie was being dramatic, nothing more to it.’
‘She stabbed Katie with her shoe!’ Naomi said pointedly.
‘A very expensive shoe. She should be honoured.’
Despite Lily’s comments Naomi continued.
‘You can’t do that, Katie is the only thing that’s . . .’
‘The only thing that’s what?’ I turned to my friend, confused. When I left high school I made sure she had more friends than just me, what happened? It’s not like – oh, you’ve got to be kidding me.
‘The only thing you have left?’ I prodded, but the girl in front of me looked down to the ground in shame, fiddling with her hands.
‘Jessica,’ Grace butted in, glaring me down. I tried to return it but it was no use, everything was piling on, weighing me down with each passing second.
My brother hadn’t been in contact for weeks, I’d distanced myself from Chris, Willow died, I’d just technically assaulted someone and now I knew Naomi had been living under Katie’s boot for a year. I thought this day couldn’t get any worse but evidently, it just did.
‘We need to go right now. It’s getting dark, it’s not safe,’ Grace said.
I knew for a fact she wasn’t talking about our safety in the city, she was talking about how it wasn’t smart to be away from the Academy after we’d been ordered back. All our phones had trackers in them, they’d know we hadn’t moved.
‘Well it was nice to finally meet you, fire thong, heard a lot of great things, good stories,’ Lily added, standing up.
Quinn didn’t say anything but as her hand took mine for a moment, the grip alone made me want to leave.
As the girls left the table I paused – how could I leave Naomi like this? She stayed quiet, but once my team were out of earshot she turned her attention back to me.
‘I can’t believe you didn’t tell me,’ I said quietly, crossing my arms.
‘Well, you were busy.’
‘Naomi, I would have called you every day if I knew this was going on.’ I quickly took a step towards her, but then she took a step back.
‘But you didn’t so you didn’t call,’ Naomi spat. ‘You didn’t text, you didn’t do anything and I thought I had done something wrong.’
‘What? No,’ I said adamantly, ‘you did nothing wrong.’
‘Then why? Why did you just stop?’
‘Jessica!’ Grace yelled from behind, but I couldn’t leave it there, not when Naomi was practically yelling at me for answers.
‘I couldn’t call you, I was –’
That’s when I heard it, the revving of an engine and the car honk. A sleek black car pulled up at the corner kerb then sat there, waiting.
Fuck.
‘Naomi, I need to go,’ I tried.
This needed to stop now – they must have seen we hadn’t left so sent the nearest car to collect us. Just as I was about to walk away, a firm hand grasped my arm. The instinct to retaliate kicked in, my own hand raising, but it soon fell as I reminded myself it was only Naomi.
‘No,’ Naomi said, but this time her voice was small as she let go. ‘You don’t get to just run out of my life.’
Another car honk.
‘Jessica!’
‘I’ll call you tomorrow,’ I lied, before spinning on my heels, running as fast as I could down the street.
We should have left, this could have all been avoided. What had I done?
‘Jess!’ Naomi yelled, but I didn’t turn.
To a civilian, getting collected was a thing of luxury but to me, I would rather have walked the forty-eight miles back.
As my fingers pulled the car door open I hurriedly sat down in the far seat, the rich smell of leather bringing little comfort. I made sure to stay quiet in case the microphones situated around the car were recording; there was no need for the faculty to find out about Naomi.
Once we were all seated and the door closed, we were off into the darkening streets of the city. No one was allowed to see the driver; there was always a partition up and the front windows were blacked out. For all I knew, Harkness was driving.
Any relief Naomi had brought me slipped away as every muscle in my body tightened. What punishment would be waiting for us?
Ten minutes passed before I mustered up the courage to say anything.
‘How late are we?’
‘Twenty minutes, but with this traffic, thirty.’
‘When we get out let me do all the talking,’ I said to them, but Lily shook her head, as did Grace. ‘It’s my fault that we’re late, OK just . . . let me take it.’ My hand went over Quinn’s, which was no longer clammy but cold. ‘You’re gonna be OK. I’ll do the talking and I’ll explain what happened.’
‘Do you think that he’ll . . . you know?’
‘If he does there isn’t much I can do. You three just go back to the house, OK.’
It wasn’t a question and it wasn’t intended to be – they shouldn’t see what was about to happen.
‘We can come with you, maybe he’ll be more lenient,’ Quinn tried, but I pulled my hand away.
‘That’s an order,’ I said plainly. ‘Go back to the house, not a word of what happened to anyone.’
Right then we should have been focused on Willow, we should have been mourning her death, but Naomi distracted me. Even though it wasn’t for long, it was enough to take my mind back to high school. Away from all of this.
Why didn’t I feel sad or upset about Willow? I should be crying but instead I was scared. I had no clue what to say to him. I knew one thing for certain though: I would never let Naomi find out about the real me, if it was the last thing I did.
CHAPTER 4
Foresket
Enamoured at first meeting.
NAOMI JADE
Well, this was exactly how I wanted to spend my night.
‘Carol, did you put my sleeping shorts in the washing?’
‘Yes!’
‘Why?’
‘They were filthy!’
‘I’ve only had them on twice!’
Here we
see an old married couple in their natural habitat, squabbling over pointless questions such as: whose turn it was to take the bins out, who did the dishes last, and if the other had hidden their slippers. May I introduce my parents.
I plopped down on the couch in the living room next to my dad, who was watching Strictly Come Dancing, as he did religiously, every Saturday night at seven o’clock. He watched with an idle smile, his hair greying and wrinkles crinkling as he laughed at the screen.
‘They reeked, Charles!’ my mother scolded from the kitchen.
At the shrill yelling of my mother, his happy manner turned to an irritated one.
‘You need to get your nose checked!’
‘You need to get your eyes checked!’ my mother yelled in retort. ‘Any man could see they were dirty, then again you couldn’t, so what kind of a man does that make you?’
Someone save me. Anybody. These two were going to drive me to insanity. All they did was argue about who moved the washing powder and why my dad refused to iron the duvet covers.
The sound of the next dance routine played in the background while my parents continued their ridiculous argument. Meanwhile, I fiddled absent-mindedly with a thread coming loose from my yellow jumper.
Here I sat, single and ready to mingle with no one. Cause all the guys I liked were either taken, fictional, a celebrity, or swung for the other team. Why was it so hard to find a decent guy? I’m a nice person! My mum said I was too anti-social, that I needed to go to more parties and make friends. Even though everyone was usually too drunk to remember me by the end of the night.
‘Charles, turn that off and come and help me!’
My dad let out an exasperated sigh, pushing himself up from the plush grey couch, making his way through to the kitchen.
Our living room was of average size, a long couch and chair next to the window, a table at the other side of the room next to the French doors, with the TV in front of the couch. And to top it all off, my mum’s amazing colour scheme: grey. Was every forty-something woman’s favourite colour grey?