by Emery Hale
The Academy was quieter than usual, a lot of people preferred to train in the evenings, but I could still smell the remains of Helen’s takeout from reception.
When I made it to the fourth floor and stepped out of the lift, I heard the rantings and ravings of some man at the nurses’ desk. As I walked through the ward I caught sight of the lunatic, but didn’t pay him any attention because I spotted Grace looking at some X-rays.
‘Aspin, clean up in isolation,’ I ordered.
‘Did you at least leave me a face this time?’ she asked.
‘Got her in the heart, it’s the only bullet you’ll need to take out.’
‘Great, last time the embalmer had a nightmare of a job.’
‘Just get it done,’ I snapped, heading back to the lift.
Thompson was the next man on my list, I needed to tell him about Agent 784T. The sooner the story got out the sooner we could be rid of the body. Didn’t need her cluttering up the place.
Suddenly as I got to the lift a force threw me forward, slamming me into the back wall. I spun around throwing my arms out, but the man caught them. I swung my leg out, then threw my fist forward, landing a solid hit to his chest. The man let out various grunts, his shoulders slamming into the lift wall as the doors closed. The light above us flickered from the impact of his head banging against the metal as I delivered a swift punch to his Adam’s apple. I thought the man had learned his lesson but he came back for more, grabbing me by the shoulders. Easy.
I spun around, kicking one of my legs in the air before propelling the other one up, twisting my body like a corkscrew and quickly slithering out of his grip before punching him in the face. But he still didn’t give up – he tried to grab my arms but I threw one to the side, blocking it with a half step. I turned, about to deliver a swift elbow to the face but he stopped it, grabbing my arm and twisting it behind my back.
I let out a grunt as he hurled me against the wall.
‘Jessica, let me explain, you need to listen.’ I heard his fist pound the wall and saw out of the corner of my eye the yellow glow of the emergency stop.
‘You want a bullet in your head?’
‘Don’t say that, Jessica, don’t say that to me.’
‘Let go.’
‘Not until you listen to me.’
‘I don’t want to hear it.’
I jolted my heel into his toes, hoping to cripple him, but the man remained solid as a pillar. I tried to wrestle my way out but he only moved closer, his breath making the hairs on the back of my neck stand up and a shiver tingle through my spine.
‘Jess, baby, please.’
‘Don’t call me that.’
‘You’re stronger than this, you have to fight it.’
‘Let go, or the next thing that will go through your head is my fist.’
‘Charlie.’ What? Who was he talking about? My brother? He died years ago, why was he of any relevance? ‘You told me what happened, do you remember?’
I-I don’t know, what happened? It was in a hotel room, the window was open, there was a gun in my hand.
‘It doesn’t matter.’
‘You do remember don’t you?’ he asked. ‘What’s my name?’
‘I don’t care.’
The man fell deathly quiet, his warm clammy breath easing away as he let go of my arms. When I turned around to face him I knew there was something familiar, but nothing sprang to mind. He had dark hair, mid-twenties, tanned skin, black eyes with a brown leather jacket and a green shirt.
The expression on his face wasn’t one of defeat, it was one I had seen countless times in all the romance films Quinn forced me to watch: heartbreak.
‘You don’t remember my name?’ His voice was soft, weak.
The man in front of me sparked something in my mind, was it his thick lips or the way his eyes sucked me in? What was his name? My eyes trailed down his body until they came to his hands. He wore a gold plated ring on his thumb, a crest embellished on it.
‘Chris, your family would hate me.’
‘No they wouldn’t, if anything my sister would become your annoying best friend and force you to play dolls with her.’
Images flashed before my eyes, the man and I were someplace familiar, not the Academy. Somewhere warm, fresh cinnamon in the air.
Abruptly I was back in the lift. Chris, that was his name. Christopher Barnes.
‘You’re . . . ’
SCREECH
The lift doors opened, pried apart by clawing hands belonging to Dr McKay whose eyes bulged at the pair of us, frantically looking to Chris.
‘You have to get out of here,’ McKay said to him. ‘If Harkness knows you’re here – come on now, quickly.’ Dr McKay held out a hand but Chris didn’t take it.
Why wasn’t he leaving? This broke protocol, no visitors unless express permission was given. He couldn’t be here, shouldn’t even be in this lift.
Chris’s eyes focused on mine – why did he care so much about me? He tackled me into a lift and forced me to listen to him. Must be a madman, no one should care about an agent that much, if they did they’d grow attached. Soldiers were easily replaceable. Had to be in this line of work.
In one swift motion Chris cupped my face, caressing my forehead with a gentle kiss, his lips soft and warm. It unlocked something, something familiar, something that felt like home.
‘I’ll come back for you, I promise,’ he told me before he took the doctor’s hand and left.
But his scent lingered, fresh spice.
I knew his name, and even though my mind told me I didn’t know him at all, my heart screamed otherwise. The way he touched my face, the way he kissed me. His hands were rough but his touch was tender, and I needed more.
That was when Dr McKay came back and pressed the button for the ground floor.
‘You are to repeat what just happened to no one, do you understand?’ he asked.
His voice wasn’t commanding at all but there was meaning behind his words. I nodded, of course I wouldn’t tell anyone what happened. It was a breach of protocol and I didn’t want to go back to isolation, not when I’d just earned my place back.
The lift doors closed and I was on my way down, shouldn’t there be music? I remember there being music in this lift – or was that at the hotel, with Charlie. Stop. Not important, not relevant and certainly not helpful.
Then the lift doors pinged and opened.
Today the world seemed determined to stop me from my tasks as the clatter of heels strode down the corridor towards me. It was strange, considering no one walked like that here. I didn’t need to see the person to know the walk was one of authority.
As I left the lift I saw it was a woman, early thirties, rich mocha skin with textured curly hair, defined cheekbones and full lips. She wore a black power suit and had a long-strapped bag resting on her shoulder.
As soon as she spotted me she curled her finger beckoningly.
‘Winters, I need you.’
‘I’m busy,’ I stated.
The next words out of her mouth practically commanded me to follow.
‘Command Room 2, now.’
I spotted a white badge clipped to her trousers as I walked closer, a gold chip in the middle. Her name was Nicola Ramos. Once again it sounded familiar, and yet recognition slipped from my grasp. If I didn’t know her straightaway then she wasn’t important to my missions. Why had she taken an interest in me?
A couple of rogue students stared as I followed Nicola through the corridors towards the command rooms, her heels soon becoming the only sound I could focus on. Click, click, click. What had Chris unlocked? I hadn’t thought about the hotel in months. All I felt now was pain setting deep in my bones, like they were breaking one by one. Fracture by fracture. The Academy promised to take away all of my pain and guilt, why was it flooding back?
Nicola stepped into one of the command rooms and waited until I was inside before closing the door. Then she slung her bag on a nearby desk, but didn’t move
to turn the lights on. As I went to do so, she held up a hand.
‘Leave them off.’ She pulled up a chair and sat herself down. ‘Now, Jessica. You’re a hard girl to pin down. I’ve visited numerous times and yet you’re never here. Isn’t that strange for someone who hasn’t left the compound in seven months?’ she asked. ‘You’re never available and yet, here you are.’
Had it been that long? I must have missed my birthday, Christmas – what happened at Christmas? Did I meet up with anyone? James must have come to collect me, we always spent the holidays together. James? The name appeared but then eluded me like a ghost.
‘Is there something I can help you with? I have other duties that need attending to.’
The woman clasped her hands. ‘My name is Nicola Ramos. I’m the director of your brother’s section at MI6.’ What the hell was MI6 doing here? They never visited, they hated us. ‘I’ve come here to apologise for what happened on the last operation we ran. The comm units should not have been hijacked so easily. Measures have been put in place to prevent that in the future.’
What was she talking about? I hadn’t worked with MI6 ever. I’d never seen this woman before in my life. I mean the town up north we went to . . . Brora. Why was that name familiar? Wasn’t that where I grew up? It’s a coastal town up north, had fields that stank of cow manure and dirt that squelched of blood. A raging fire with burning flesh. I could almost taste the smoke filtering down my throat. How had I forgotten about that?
‘Jessica?’ Nicola asked.
‘Is there anything else?’ My fingers fiddled behind my back.
She nodded. ‘You’ll be transferred from the Academy tomorrow morning and brought to work in my section.’
What? No! I didn’t want to work for anyone else, this place was my home, my sanctuary. I didn’t want to leave. I’d just gained their trust and now they’d give me more missions. I needed to prove that I was worthy of their time.
‘I have a team, I can’t abandon them.’
‘Your safety has been compromised,’ Nicola said pointedly. ‘You’ve been pulled out of the programme.’
‘Since when?’ I demanded.
‘Ten minutes ago. I suggest you pack a bag.’
‘You don’t have the authority to do this,’ I nearly yelled.
‘In fact, I do,’ she snapped. ‘Your brother brought the matter to me and I made the decision. You’re a great agent, we could use you in our department.’
My brother? Right, his name was James. He was tall, well-built and taught me how to read. I’d forgotten about him.
‘I don’t want to go.’
‘You don’t have a choice.’ Nicola stood up, grabbed her bag and headed for the door. ‘You’re going to be free, Jessica, take the opportunity. We can worry about your friends later.’ Then, just like that, the door swung shut behind her.
I wasn’t going anywhere. I was loyal to the Academy, not to anyone else, and certainly not any of the other services. My brother wanted me out, but why? Didn’t he know all the good we’d done? The great achievements of this institution within society? We had control over the entire country, agents within parliament, the high street, the doctors, the pharmacists and even the theatre.
Sure, she was the head of a department, but she had no right to come in here, the Academy was above the other services. Were they, though? I’d never really thought of rankings. I just knew we were separate, so really, there was no competition.
Maybe I was being released – a job in espionage was what I wanted.
Would Harkness allow this? I knew every decision came down to him – he ran the Academy, after all. I was his solider to do with as he pleased – would he send me away? Perhaps if I left it would be best for the team. All I caused was trouble and my last Carrier died on the job.
The videos that were stored on Quinn’s computer had remained there for a while; I decided not to release them. Over the last several months Trojan attacks had gone from weekly to none at all; the seniors and my team had prevented countless tragedies. There was no need to tear down the facility that was saving innocent lives.
Before all of this I worried that something was wrong with me, that I lacked empathy. Now I didn’t have to worry anymore because emotion never came into it, not in this line of work. Now, I was free.
CHAPTER 28
Ubuntu
The belief that we are defined by passion and kindness towards others.
NAOMI JADE
You know, getting changed in the back of a car was definitely harder than I expected. Trying to put on a uniform without flashing my bra or knickers at Kayson was my first obstacle but with some shimmying, my grannie panties weren’t exposed. The next problem was the wig. I threw it on and pinned it but the driver (who was blocked from view by the partition) had a thing for sharp corners, slamming me into the door even though I was wearing a seatbelt. Thankfully Kayson pulled out his phone so I could use it as a mirror because, and I quote, ‘your wig’s a bit skew-whiff.’
For once he was helping me, holding the different bits and bobs while I tried to recreate the disguise on my face. Kayson told me he’d stolen everything from one of the first year teams, bet they would have swooned at the sight of him. A handsome older guy just strolling in unannounced – Naomi! You have a job to do, stop daydreaming.
As we got onto the motorway, butterflies fluttered in my stomach. The disguise wasn’t too far off what Quinn had created, yet I was terrified. The thought of going back there made my heart thunder against my ribcage.
Fight or flight response – come on, Naomi, this time you have to fight.
After fixing my make-up I slipped on the black heels which were considerably taller than I was used to. Quinn had let me wear lower ones.
‘Kayson, how the hell am I meant to walk in these?’ I asked quietly.
‘They’re heels and you’re a girl, I just thought you always wore heels.’
Oh Kayson, you idiot. ‘I’m gonna let that one slide,’ I told him.
‘All the girls wear them when they’re on outside duty, which is your cover.’
‘Not all girls have ankles of steel and bones of titanium.’
‘I’ve seen girls run in these heels.’
‘Well, you should fear them.’
The heels were at least four inches which, for someone who rarely wears anything over three, was a challenge. I’d have to hold onto Kayson until I got the hang of this. Great, up close and personal with Mr Kayson Ashford.
He chuckled after my last comment, leaning back in the seat, and throwing everything I’d used into his duffle bag. Then we fell into comfortable silence as I focused on folding my clothes neatly. I made sure to do it as slowly as possible because it stopped me daydreaming about Kayson.
He asked me for help – me. Kayson could have chosen anyone, but he turned up on my street with hope and a plan. I wondered how long he’d thought about this, and how he’d come up with the idea in the first place. How desperate had he gotten? There must have been other plans before this one. I couldn’t have been his first option.
As I zipped the bag closed, I fiddled with the white plastic ID card Quinn had whipped up for our unsanctioned break-in. Did she even remember that? Me?
‘How many fake identities do you have?’ I asked, trying to make conversation.
The silence was nice, but I needed some form of background noise – a distraction from what I was about to walk back into.
He seemed surprised at the question. ‘One.’
What, seriously? He’d been to different countries all over the world, didn’t he get a new name for each one?
‘What happened to protecting your identity?’ I asked.
Kayson shook his head.
‘Naomi, it’s not like the movies,’ he told me. ‘There aren’t boxes stashed away in lockers all around the world with fake passports, money and guns.’
What? So that was all made up? Oh . . . disappointing.
‘Your alias identities are specif
ic to you and to whatever agency you work for. Can’t be running around with eight different names – if you ran into trouble you’d have no idea what cover to play.’
I guess that made sense. I had two so far, although Marsha Evans didn’t really count. I presumed they used that pass any time they had to sneak someone in for emergencies. Did Marsha exist? Was she just a name in a file? Was that where everyone at the Academy would end up? Tucked away in some filing cabinet. Willow was.
‘You can never just be yourself in this industry can you?’ I asked and then motioned to myself – but to my amazement, he shook his head.
‘You can always be yourself around your team. You train together, fight together, and more importantly, you’re constantly surprised by them, every single day. No matter how scared someone is, with the right words they’re able to do anything.’ Kayson chuckled, his eyes falling to the ground as he reminisced. ‘You know your team inside out. Their weaknesses, their strengths, their fatal flaws. You see them on the roughest days of their lives, the ones you think they’ll never crawl out of.’ He paused. ‘But they do. Your team isn’t just a bunch of friends, there’s trust and loyalty, like a family.’
I had to clench my jaw to stop my mouth falling open – where was all of this at the beginning? Kayson was ranting like he’d had no one else to talk to for years.
‘Since when were you so sentimental?’ I asked.
‘Since I lost my family. I don’t think I’m ever going to see them again.’ Tears brimmed in Kayson’s eyes – they were small, but nevertheless, they were there. ‘I treated you like shit, Naomi, even when I didn’t know you. A couple of minutes after you left I was made to sit and watch as the spark of humanity drained from every one of those girls’ eyes. I took them all for granted, took you for granted.’
I certainly wasn’t prepared for that speech.
He’d witnessed something that day. He’d been forced to watch them drug his friends, friends who were so close he considered them family. I’ve never seen life become void, never seen the flame extinguished, but I can imagine it puts things into perspective.