by Tijan
“I think…” Quincey’s voice came out hesitant. I didn’t dare look. I didn’t want to miss anything Nova was going to do. “I think she just gave you a love spell or something.”
I was a mess.
This. Today. This was the day I woke up to the world.
I pulled my daughter close, hugging her, and I whispered, “Your daddy loves you very much.”
She was mine. I knew she was. Knew the second I saw her, saw my eyes looking back at me.
More happy cooing came from her.
I closed my eyes, pressed a soft kiss to her forehead, and she was still again.
The room shifted, growing more serious and almost sacred.
Nova might’ve been eighteen months, but she felt it. I thought anyway…
She leaned back against my shoulder. One arm came over, resting down my back, and her head leaned forward, resting on the side of my neck.
After that, I carried her down.
Quincey took her to the car. That was the first time I spared her a look.
She was pale, fresh tears streaking down her face, and she was biting her lip.
An urge to reach out and take her arm to ask if she was all right came over me.
I held back.
Then Nova was being put in her car seat, her bright eyes staring at me. Quincey lingered by the closed door, but I didn’t spare her another look.
“I’ll, um, I’ll be in touch?”
She started to go around the car.
“Quincey?”
She paused, looking up.
I stepped forward, not letting Nova see my face.
When she did, she gulped, her hands tightening around her purse.
“I was told to wait two days for the results, but she’s mine. She was Valerie’s. If you want to be in her life, you won’t fight me on this. You give that message to your father.”
Blood drained from her face.
She didn’t answer, blinking a few times, then continued around to the driver’s side.
I cleared my face, stepped back, and smiled down at Nova.
She pumped her arms, her little penguin clutched in her hands. She was waving it at me.
Now I was back in my hotel room, sitting in that chair, and I hadn’t moved for a full hour.
My phone rang then, and I had just gotten done catching my little sister up to date.
She was quiet for a moment afterward.
“She’s perfect, Aspen. Just fucking perfect.”
“I’m an aunt?”
“You’re an aunt.”
“Holy… whoa. You’re in Seattle now?”
“Yeah.”
“I’m in Hungary. I was in Seattle for two years! I was there. What?!” There was a sound from her end, a rustling movement. I heard Blaise’s voice, then she answered back, her voice muffled.
“Aspen.” I frowned. “What are you doing?”
“I’m coming back to the States. My brother needs me.”
“What?!” That was from Blaise.
Aspen’s voice came back. “Hold on. I’ll call you back.”
“Nate?” I heard in the hotel room, outside my bedroom.
I put the phone aside. “In here.”
Mason and Logan came in, both eyes hooded until they got a good view of me.
“Shit,” Mason said.
“Damn.”
The two shared a look.
Mason nodded at Logan.
Logan went over, grabbed my wallet, and tossed it on the bed. “Wash your face, brother. We’re going out.”
I groaned and sat forward. “I don’t know if my legs will walk.”
“Then we’ll carry you.” Mason stepped forward.
Yes. They would.
12
Quincey
I needed alone time, and I needed to move.
It started snowing this morning, so I left the lights off when I headed into my studio. I opened the wall chambers to expose the floor-to-ceiling windows, then put the music on. The heat filtered through, but I kept it turned down.
There was so much noise in my head. Too much.
I needed to clear it out. I needed things to make sense.
Nothing was making sense right now.
You win. Always. Those were my father’s words, his motto. It was how he lived his life.
Valerie didn’t live life that way. Neither did our mom. Neither did Graham and Calihan.
Why me?
Why did she choose me to take Nova?
Why did Valerie want her in this life with me?
“Oh my God, Quince! You can’t be serious with that costume.”
I was stretching and paused as Valerie’s voice ripped through my concentration. It was a memory, and Valerie had been laughing. It was one of my rare visits to our mom’s house on Halloween. I was dressed as the Statue of Liberty, and Valerie had dressed as a fairy. She looked cute in a green tutu with pink glitter all over her body and in her hair. I came out with a microphone wrapped in cellophane and a white sheet around my body. I was wearing a wig and had gold glitter all over me.
I thought I’d been ingenious.
Valerie and Calihan had not. They both jumped up from eating brownies, and I was quickly changed into the third fairy for their trio of fairies. It’d been one of the few times I felt as “one” with my sisters.
My phone buzzed, lighting up the studio.
I paused, the memory now fading, and I reached over, seeing Ricci’s name on the screen. She was the only friend I kept in contact with from high school. I swiped the screen, her text lighting up with a picture.
Ricci: OH MY GOD! That’s him, isn’t it?! And he’s in Seattle now???? U ok? Have u seen him yet?
I clicked on the picture, seeing Nate at a nightclub with his two friends on either side of him. It was from one of the gossip blogs, the headline reading, Mason Kade and Nate Monson at Club Poof!
Buzz!
A second picture came in. This one was Logan shielding Nate, his arm up, and he was scowling over his shoulder at a photographer.
Ricci: Holy shit. They’re all hot! No wonder Nova is already stunning.
I instantly softened, a warmth spreading through me because she was. She had the beginning of a serene face. Nova was going to be absolutely gorgeous, but it made sense. Valerie had done a small stint as a model, and now I had seen Nate’s looks up close and personal.
But there was more.
There was the air that moved around him. It was like he was a vacuum, and he pulled you to him. As if you needed oxygen and he was the only one to give it to you.
Buzz!
A third picture from Ricci.
This must’ve been from later in the night. All three were exiting Club Poof, a trendy nightclub usually known for being secretive about its clientele. And Seattle didn’t usually have paparazzi at the ready, so either a call was made or someone sold their pictures. I wasn’t altogether surprised. I’d forgotten Nate’s relation to Blaise DeVroe, who had been Seattle’s star soccer player for a couple of years.
Of course, Nate would be recognized here.
I cursed softly, sitting more on my butt and drawing my knees up to my chest.
My phone started ringing.
Ricci calling.
I hit accept. “Hey.”
I flinched, hearing the catch in my voice.
“Oh. Whoa. You okay? Did you see the pics I just sent?”
My heart sank, but I didn’t know why. “I saw them.”
She was quiet.
“You okay, babe? You don’t sound okay,” she murmured.
I set the phone on the floor, putting it on speaker, and I rested my cheek against my knee. “I’m… I’ve seen him for the past two days.”
I heard her swift intake of breath.
“It’s why he’s here, Ric.”
“Oh. Babe. I didn’t know that would happen that fast.”
“He met up with our PI, so it made sense to move fast before he could get his own side assembled, you
know?” Acid filled my mouth as I said those words. It felt wrong. It tasted wrong.
It was wrong.
“What does…?” She sounded so hesitant. “What does Daddy Duke say about all this?”
I snorted. “What do you think?”
“Quincey.” It was a soft sigh from her.
A lump was in my throat, bulging out, choking me. “Yeah.”
“I just want to make sure I’m hearing this right. Your dad for sure wants to fight for Nova?”
“Yeah.”
“You think, I mean, what’s Nate Monson like?”
“Oh.” I bit out a harsh laugh. “He’s prepared for war. It’s why his friends are here, too.”
“I was wondering about that. I mean, that one is missing football practice, right?”
“He missed one. When we got the paternity test results back, I took Nova over there again, and he was gone. I’m sure he had to go back. The other one is still there. He’s the lawyer one.”
“Babe. Man. I’m sorry. Wait. Paternity test?”
“Yeah.”
“Oh. I mean, that makes sense. Kinda? It confirmed he’s the dad, right?”
“He is. But I already knew. I never doubted Val.”
“Your sister wasn’t a liar. Now, Calihan, on the other hand…” She laughed, trailing off.
I laughed. It was true. My younger sister was a lot, but I laughed because I needed to. So much was building, rising. Things were escalating. It started when Carl called.
The hotel meeting.
The meeting at the house.
The hotel again.
Every call since then, every visit since then.
The threats.
The promises.
And just now, hearing Ricci’s pity, a dam broke inside me.
It was wrong.
I’d been feeling it this whole time, but damn. Damn!
Nova was mine. She wasn’t my father’s.
Duke couldn’t win. I was trying to envision it, but he couldn’t. The second I met Nate, I knew my father was going to lose. If Nate was a different person, then maybe. Maybe if he’d been an alcoholic. Maybe if he’d been a drug addict. Maybe if he was sleazy or dirty.
Maybe if he’d been Nico, but he wasn’t. He was the opposite of who my sister actually married.
And I knew what Duke wanted to risk. All or nothing. If we had Nova, only we had Nova. There’d be no shared custody. And Nate—I couldn’t risk losing her. I just couldn’t.
“He threatened me, Ric. He said if I fight him, then I’ll lose her for sure.”
My voice was trembling.
“You believe him?”
An image of him as he said those words, staring at me across the top of my car, flashed in my mind again.
He’d been unrelenting in his gaze. I’d been seared from the inside out from those words and the promise behind them.
“Yeah.” I could feel it in my bones. “He’ll never stop fighting for her, and Ric, we don’t have anything to fight him on. Valerie put his name on the birth certificate. The test came back that he’s the father. He was never told he had a daughter. He’s already gone to lawyers. I mean, he had one flown in. It’s one of his best friends.”
“Why do you think she never told him?”
A snort ripped from me. “Who knows. Maybe she was afraid of losing her, too? Because Nico was already in her life by then.”
Sounding surprised, she said, “You’re right. Nico. He was an asshole from day one. You’re totally right.”
“I didn’t know Nico was that bad. I swear I didn’t.”
“No one did. Val hid him.” A pause from her end.
I was just biting back tears. They were threatening to choke me.
“Val never changed her last name. She didn’t take his.”
I took in a deep breath. “Yeah. I never questioned her, figured it took time or something. That should’ve been a flag.”
“Is Nico going to be a problem for Nova?”
“No.” Thank God. “Carl dug up his current case. He’s in for robbery and he said the evidence is bad. Unless he cuts a deal, he should be going to prison for a while. It’s not his first offense.”
I tasted sour on that note, because that’d been another thing Valerie hadn’t told anyone.
“Well, that’s done. He’s gone now, and Nova got Nate. Have you talked to Graham or Calihan about what’s going on?”
Another snort from me, but the heaviness slammed down on my shoulders. That was a whole different battle. “No. They’re angry. They thought Nova would be left to them.”
“I can’t imagine what they’re thinking either. This must be a total slap in the face to them.”
“I know.”
I wasn’t close to them.
There was a year separation between my mom and Guy, her husband at that time. She had had a weekend fling with my dad. I was born, but by that time, she’d gone back to Guy, realizing he was her one true love. She already had Graham a year before me, then Valerie a year after me, and Calihan two years after Val.
“Cal took it the hardest.”
“No one’s reached out since you took Nova?”
“Stephanie has. A few times.”
“Right. Your mom.”
“Right…”
She sighed again. “Want me to come over?”
I looked up at the empty studio and the snow falling outside. “No. I was about to do some dancing, then head in to spend time with Nova.”
“Okay. Well, I’m here for you.”
I could hear she had more to say. “What is it?”
“Quince.” Another sigh from her.
“What? Just say it.”
“You were a principal dancer for three years, and that’s after an entire career of dancing. I know you have money saved.”
God.
She was going there.
I didn’t want her to go there.
I didn’t want to go there.
Not yet.
Please, I was begging her in my head. Not yet. Don’t say it.
“Ricci,” I warned.
I reached out, placing my palm on the floor. I was leaning down, pressing down on my hand.
I didn’t want to hear what she was going to say.
She hurried, her voice rising. “We both know what your father is going to say. It’s what he’s always going to say. Babe—” She broke off, and I could hear her taking a deep breath. “You and me, we don’t always talk about what went down in your childhood, but it wasn’t right. What he did—”
I shoved to my feet. “Don’t, Ricci! Don’t say something you can’t take back.”
My chest was so heavy.
Something was pressing down on it.
My head was starting to spin.
She kept on, sounding almost desperate, “Look, your dad. He’s—he’s cold, Quince. It’s never been anything he’s out and out done, but he always made you feel guilty about having relationships with other people. I got a pass because I was in dance with you and you needed one friend, but how I saw it. Anyone you liked, he’d say one bad thing about them. Then another bad thing. Then another. He planted seeds in your head, and he turned you against people. I know your mom. She’s freaking kick-ass, but it’s like you can’t let yourself love her like a mom. And it’s your dad. It’s all him. It’s like if you love someone else, you can’t love him or something. Whether Nate is in the picture or not, that’ll happen with Nova if you don’t fight him. Leopards don’t change their spots, babe.”
“Ricci!”
She was crying on her end. I heard her sobs. “This might be a blessing. You never know, just... I just have to say that I'm here for you if you want to move out on your own. You can live here. I know it’s not what you’d be leaving, but it’s better than nothing. And I’d help you with Nova. You’re not alone. Okay? I… you have to hear that. You are not alone. I’m prepared to go the distance with you.”
I almost crumpled.
It was the lio
n pressing at the gate, wanting to get in.
The gate kept rattling, shaking, trembling. She opened it, and there it was, an ultimatum she wasn’t putting into words. She didn’t need to.
I knew it.
She knew it.
Everyone who knew my father knew it.
He would fight for Nova for the sheer sake of winning, and if we lost, we lost everything.
I couldn’t let that happen.
I knew what the end would look like. I felt it in my bones, and if I walked into that house, told Duke again that I wanted to compromise with Nate, he would tell me to either get out or get behind him. It was an either/or scenario with him. There was no gray. No in-between.
It was how it had always been.
I wasn’t ready for that.
“I have to go.” I said it so faint that I barely heard myself.
“Quincey?”
But I was already reaching for the phone to end the call. “I have to go.”
The light on my phone cut out, and I was alone in a studio with snow falling all around me.
A sob caught in my throat. I didn’t want to feel right now.
I wanted to dance.
So I did.
13
Later that same day
Nate: I want to see my daughter today.
Quincey: Give me a few days.
Nate: No.
Quincey: Please.
Nate: I want to see my daughter today.
Quincey: I’ll bring her to you.
The next morning.
Nate: Legal papers will be drawn up concerning my daughter. My question is, what stance should I let my lawyers take? Is it a full-on custody battle, or are you going to be cooperative?
Quincey: I am asking you for a few days.
Nate: No. You brought Nova to me, then left. You and I need to talk about this ourselves.
Quincey: I. Need. More. Time.
Later the next day.
Nate: Fine, but I want Nova here for the whole day. My sister is flying in to see her.
Quincey: I’ll bring her within the hour.
Three days later.