by C. J. Hill
“And, really, do not you think, Mrs. Collins, it is preferable that all young people should remain within their own spheres when considering marriage? You have done just that and have assured yourself of a comfortable life; nothing too grand but agreeable enough, I should hope?”
Charlotte, a little discomfited by the question when she had just been musing to herself with some degree of amusement about Elizabeth’s near-miss in quitting her sphere, hastily brought herself back to the conversation.
“Why, yes, Lady Catherine, I suppose that, in theory, it is a sensible idea that everyone should remain within their level of society but I see nothing wrong with trying to improve one’s situation; indeed, I believe that has been the object for many young people be they male or female over the centuries, as is depicted in literature. Surely, for some, it is more a matter of finding someone with whom they share interests and can respect and honour, regardless of that person’s rank in society. Lydia has chosen quite below her status as a gentleman’s daughter but then she has never taken a great interest in being a gentleman’s daughter except where it could benefit her materially. She certainly did nothing to expand her mind or her understanding of the world as she had opportunity to do. And so, it would appear that she is ideally suited to her husband who is equally ignorant, superficial and unashamed of his conduct; they should get along very well together.”
Lady Catherine blinked at this long outburst of Charlotte’s, used as she was to her more minimal discussions and opinions.
“But who are her relations? They are not gentlemen; they are in business are they not? How can she have pretensions of being a gentleman’s daughter with those connections, pray? Oh, her father may well be such but everyone else associated with him is of such low quality that I would be mortified should any of my family attach themselves to such a family. Especially now they have such a blot upon them with an association with such a man. Oh! It could not be borne! Thank goodness my daughter is already spoken for and engaged, however informally, to Darcy. It is a relief to me that she shall not make the mistake of choosing for herself some worthless young man who flatters and wins her over but merely seeks her fortune.”
“Indeed, Lady Catherine, until you mentioned it to me several months ago, I was unaware of this engagement. Forgive me if I seem impertinent, but neither party showed any preference for the other in the Spring; indeed, they did not seem very well acquainted with each other at all.”
Charlotte longed to know more, and her knowledge that Mr. Darcy had proposed to her friend fuelled her questions! How could an honourable man like that propose to another when he was already engaged?
Mr. Collins hastened to reduce the impending damage he saw being caused by his wife’s inquisitiveness.
“Of course, it is not for us to understand these things, Lady Catherine. Mrs. Collins has a very modern view on marriage and believes that there should be no misunderstandings between partners either before or after the wedding, and that they should know each other well. We congratulate your daughter upon her most beneficial match and wish them every happiness.”
Lady Catherine hesitated, realising, perhaps for the first time, the strangeness of the situation, and then elaborated further.
“Of course, the engagement is of a peculiar kind; his mother and I planned the alliance when they were in their infancy. An alliance to maintain the greatness of two ancient houses and to ascertain that no such interference, such as you have mentioned, should ever befall the line of Darcy and de Bourgh. When I say ‘engaged’ it is not of a formal nature but I know that Darcy’s attachment to Rosings certainly increases with every yearly visit. It can only be a matter of time until the engagement is formalised. I do not especially promote it but he and she understand the expectations of them.”
Charlotte was satisfied; Mr. Darcy’s honour was still intact. He was not engaged in fact but in theory, and only by the wishes of his mother and his aunt when he was too young to know anything about it. Well! He certainly had no intention of keeping their plan alive when he proposed to Elizabeth - if he was actually aware of the plan at all. His interactions with his cousin had been of a most polite and indifferent nature during his visit and if, from that little degree of affection, Lady Catherine believed him to be becoming more attached to Anne, she was severely misreading the situation!
Charlotte was disturbed again from her musings as Lady Catherine continued her train of thought.
“I understand that my nephew returns to your part of the country this week, Mrs. Collins. He accompanies his friend, whose name escapes me, for a shooting party. I cannot understand why he does not return to his own house, or even Rosings; we all have a vast number of birds to be shot. But there we are; men will do as they please.
“I expect your friend will commandeer all conversation with him as she did when they were both thrown together here in the spring. But perhaps, he will consider a visit to such a family to be without merit. That is what I would advise, but he has a most polite nature and insists upon proper behaviour at all times; such a gentleman and, needless to say, of excellent breeding.”
“I am sure, Lady Catherine, that whatever your nephew does it will always reflect well upon you and your family. As you say, he is a true gentleman and knows how to comport himself at every occasion.” Mr. Collins could not impress upon her ladyship enough just how much he admired her nephew, and this reciprocal agreement upon Mr. Darcy’s attributes continued for some time, alleviating Charlotte’s need to partake in it and allowing her to dwell happily upon her own thoughts.
She needed only to bolster Lady Catherine’s opinion of her nephew as required, and by the end of the evening Lady Catherine’s view of that gentleman was elevated to such an extent that she thought that she might just travel to town and pay him a visit when he returned from the country.
Charlotte then merely had to endure several impertinent questions from her ladyship regarding the progress of her condition and accept, once again, recommendations as to which doctor and apothecary she should consult, before they were dismissed and swept home in the carriage provided by her ladyship.
XXXIII
Charlotte was thrilled to know that her friend and Mr. Darcy would, once again, be thrown together in Meryton. Not that she expected, but fervently hoped that they would be able to reignite their former affections. She knew now, more than ever, that the attraction was strong on both sides and surely, when there was so much interest, there must be a happy outcome?
She did not mention anything to William but kept her thoughts hugged inside her as she passed her days, smiling unexpectedly as she reflected upon the happiness that could be in store for her friend, and the utter horror and discomfort such an event would afford Lady Catherine! How would she receive such news? Considering her discussion after dinner, it was quite clear that it would not be well. Would she cut off all ties to Darcy? Would she refuse to see Elizabeth or visit them at Pemberley?
And what would Anne do if her expected chance at marriage was removed? Charlotte did feel a pang of sadness for her friend Anne, of whom she had become quite fond since her arrival in Hunsford, but she had never given an indication of any attachment to Mr. Darcy other than that of him being an interesting visitor once a year. Charlotte could hardly imagine a man of Mr. Darcy’s vigour and worldliness being even slightly content with such a retiring and unassuming person; in his verbal sparring with Elizabeth he had shown his preference for women who spoke their minds and were not afraid to contradict and challenge him!
William found her outside feeding the chickens and immediately chided her for being out of doors on such a cold day without the appropriate clothing. He tried to bustle her indoors, to no avail.
“I cannot allow you to expose yourself to the extremes of nature in your condition if you refuse to adequately defend yourself from the cold, my dear!”
“Thank you for your concern, William, but I assure you that I am quite capable of deciding my own comfort and the requirements nec
essary for maintaining it. I am with child and sometimes I feel overheated and nauseous inside the house by the fire; I need to feel and breathe cold air. It will do me no harm to be out of doors for a short while, and I shall return very soon.”
“My dear, I feel that we must discuss something of our last quarrel which we have still not resolved. It pains me to bring it up but even I can tell that there is a restraint between us that does not seem reduced even after so long a time from the cause. I am willing to forgive your harsh words to me on that occasion, and to believe that they were the product of your over-sensitive condition. I do understand what you said regarding some of my comments to Lady Catherine and I hope that you have noticed my recent reluctance to over-discuss any matters pertaining to your friend’s family with her ladyship unless I am forced to do so.
“I miss our friendly chats, Charlotte, and I cannot think that to go on together but be so far apart can be agreeable. Please relieve me of my discomfort and tell me that I, too, am forgiven.”
Charlotte considered for a moment, noticing his honest attempt at reconciliation but also his almost utter lack of awareness of the reason for their disagreement. She drew breath, knowing that here she had the final chance to dictate the terms of their marriage into the future.
“I thank you, William, for your friendly overture but I too have reconsidered many times my comments to you on that occasion, and while they were brought on by anger, that anger was, I believe, fairly placed.
“You displayed such a distressing lack of empathy for my friend’s family’s situation that I could not believe that anyone could think that way, certainly not any person engaged in a forgiving and kind profession such as that of clergyman. I must tell you that your total want of consideration of anyone other than yourself and your delight at your fortuitous escape from the shame of it all, when you should have principally wanted to show support and sympathy for your family, shocked and astounded me. And the knowledge, when it came from the recipient, not you, of your written words to the same suffering family, only served to inflate my anger at your attitude.
“Your behaviour in that instant allowed me to see how you may react when I might need understanding and sympathy, and I cannot feel sanguine about any situation where I must rely completely upon your total support.
“However. We are married, and we should make every attempt to co-habit peacefully together. I can leave all of this in the past if you engage here and now to at least attempt to never behave in such a manner ever again. You must rebuild my belief that your nature is essentially kind and forgiving as befitting a man in your position, and that it will never be tempted to deviate from that path.
“And I must insist upon you not relating any information to others which you have gained from me and which I have asked you not to relate. I need to be able to trust you with my secrets implicitly from this moment forth, otherwise, I shall have no recourse but to allow the situation in which we find ourselves to continue. I ask only that you consider the effect of what you intend to say before it is said.”
Charlotte spoke quietly, and waited, but did not hold her breath as she had the previous time. She no longer felt that she must not speak out against her husband; she believed that hers was the just and honourable side of the argument.
William had not expected to be verbally attacked once again, as he saw it, by his wife; it went against every male instinct in his body to be so openly chided and condemned for his actions by the person who should be supporting and agreeing with him whatever the situation. While he had thought that he and Charlotte enjoyed a rather modern marriage in their joint thinking and general agreement up to this point, he certainly had not thought that such generosity in his attitude towards her would rebound upon him in such a disagreeable manner.
How could he possibly assent to her demands that she should dictate all of his decisions and behaviour? It was unthinkable. His father may have been able to get away with such attacks against his self-esteem, but those days were over and in the distant past. He was now a trained and respected clergyman, a man of education and knowledge of the world, and with superior connections. It was impossible that Charlotte should imagine that she could ever be entirely his equal however so much she may desire it.
He answered her quite stiffly after he had collected his thoughts and noticed, to his alarm, the entire lack of concern upon his wife’s face as she waited for his response.
“Perhaps you misunderstood my early attempts to include you as an equal partner in our marriage, my dear. While I have always wished for us to be in complete understanding over day-to-day matters, it has been my expectation that you should honour my wishes over your own. I do not expect to be admonished by my wife for the manner in which I express myself or choose to carry out my work. To hear you deliver such an ultimatum to your husband and master flies in the face of the grounds upon which marriage is based; there can be only one leader in any marriage and it always falls to the husband regardless of the opinions of the wife. I did not swear in God’s house on our wedding day that I would ‘obey’ you, Charlotte,” he pointed out most sternly, warming to his subject.
“I believe that you must reflect with some sincere consideration upon your role in this marriage and your desire for a harmonious home into which a new life will soon be introduced. I offered reconciliation in the expectation that it would be accepted in the spirit it was offered, namely that of restoring harmony within our lives, but you have most seriously rebuffed those efforts and it shall not be forgiven lightly this time.”
With that, Willaim turned swiftly away towards his garden before Charlotte had any opportunity to respond to his petulant outburst, which was unfortunate as, while he was speaking, it reminded her of his former arrogance and similar viciousness towards her friend when she had rebuffed his offers of marriage; how he had refused to speak or even look at Elizabeth after his humiliation.
Charlotte sighed as she recalled her enthusiasm in re-directing his attentions with offers of dinner at Lucas Lodge, her constant attention to his every word and need to salve his bruised pride. How little had changed in the man she thought she had started to improve.
However, this was not to be borne; his walking away from their discussion would, she knew, signify to him that he was the victor and his final words would linger between them as implicit agreement. This she could not allow. His assumption that he was the leader in their marriage and that she could ever only be the follower, that she should agree with anything and everything he did and said just because she was his wife was utter nonsense.
Determinedly, she followed him into his garden where he had shed his jacket and was digging away heartily, working up an immense sweat of exertion and indignation.
He looked up with surprise as she approached but returned to his task with renewed vigour, turning his back upon her. Ignoring his rebuff, she went to stand beside him, which had the effect of forcing him to stop his work or risk elbowing her in the stomach.
“What is it that you want now, Mrs. Collins?” he asked irritably, wiping sweat from his brow and scowling at her from under the same. “You have made your position most clear, and, I believe, so have I. We are arrived at a stalemate which appears to be insurmountable. We must continue as strangers from this moment forth because of your stubbornness and unwillingness to live the promise that you made under God’s roof. I did not think it should come to this, so soon. I am most affronted.”
Watching him in his shirtsleeves, sweat dripping from his chin, indignation and vanity written upon his demeanour, Charlotte felt hard pressed not to laugh at his pretensions. Did he not realise that respect had to be earned? That it could not be forced upon someone by a person so clearly lacking the ability to earn it? What could he be thinking, to be so childish and put out?
She continued to study him until he faltered and lowered his gaze back to the turned soil. He was confused by her silence and undecided as to what he should do now. She felt she had gained his attention and woul
d press her advantage.
“On the contrary, Mr. Collins, it is you who are in the wrong in this matter and well you know it. You have embarrassed me in front of many people before, and since, we were married but I was willing to overlook your social awkwardness at the start. I thought perhaps that I could, in time, manage to improve your manner so that it was not always so diffident and obsequious; I had hoped to be able to instil upon you that quiet air of sensibility expected from a man in your position in life. Indeed, I thought I had made progress towards that goal recently but your behaviour regarding the unfortunate events in your cousin’s family has undone all of my hopes of ever improving your manners.
“You must know, Mr. Collins, that until you see me as your partner in life about whom you care the most, and are willing to consider my opinions to be at least as important as your own, you can never regain my respect. It cannot merely be demanded from me – it has to be earned and given freely.
“The choice is yours, Mr. Collins, I leave it with you but do not make the mistake of thinking I shall ever be brow-beaten, by your words or any action of yours, into submitting to a situation in life which will not confer upon me at least some state of happiness. Good day.”
Charlotte was the one to leave the conference this time, and she left knowing she had probably said too much but also that nothing of what she had said had been anything other than the plain truth which her husband needed to hear for his own good and future security.
She passed into the house in time to see that Anne de Bourgh was alighting outside the front door, clearly intending to come inside for a visit. Although this was not one of the better days for entertaining, she duly greeted her guest and sat with her for at least an hour over tea and cake, but with one half of her thoughts entirely consumed with the ultimatum delivered to William.