by Jenni Sloane
I reached out and stroked his cheek. “You don’t deserve me.” My voice was low, strained with emotion.
“No.” He shook his head, his expression drawing in both moonlight and shadow, becoming, for a moment, unbearably tender. “I don’t.”
We kissed again. His hand slid down over my breast, pausing to cup it for a moment. I moaned. He dipped it lower, between my legs, rubbing through my jeans. I dug my fingers into his back, then ran one hand down to his ass and squeezed.
I broke away, panting.
“Don’t go,” he whispered, his forehead pressing against mine. “Please. Stay.”
“I can’t.”
He gripped my shoulders, and I could feel him shaking. “Let me prove to you that I’d do anything for you. Let me try—just try—to make up for what I did. I’ll put you first, Amma. Not myself. Please.”
What if I said yes?
What if I stayed and made him mine?
He’d tear me apart.
Even if he didn’t mean to.
Even if he wasn’t being overtly cruel, I would end up in pieces.
I would finally, finally break.
“Don’t let them win,” he whispered, lips brushing my cheekbone. “You didn’t let me win. Why let Callahan? Why let Ainslie?”
“You were on Ainslie’s side not too long ago!” I burst out. “You wanted to see me go down for what I did.”
“Maybe I did,” Cole said gruffly. “But you and I…we’ve both done some shit to each other. And I know I’ve done worse.”
I stared at him. “I can’t believe you’re admitting that.”
“Yeah, well. Don’t get used to it.”
I let my body sink slightly into his. My breasts pressed against his chest. I had to remember how to breathe.
“Leaving would be winning,” I murmured, closing my eyes.
He paused, his lips so nearly touching my skin. “You think that now. Until you’re trying to go to college. Until companies you know you’re good enough to work for reject you with no explanation. Trust me.”
My eyes snapped open.
Why should I? It was on the tip of my tongue to say it.
But I stopped.
Because maybe he was right. If I left Strathmore now, I would always feel something was unfinished. That kiss with Ian. The moment Bennett had walked away from me. This night here with Cole, in the spot where we’d first given in to the desire growing between us.
I owed it to myself to see this through. I owed myself the comfort I found in the arms of my men.
I swallowed as I thought about Bennett’s threat to make my next semester hell. But my resolve kicked in, steering me away from my own uncertainty. Let him try.
Let him see me with Cole and Ian. Let him see what he was missing.
A plan was starting to form in my mind. A way to get Bennett back.
A way to take revenge on Ainslie.
A way to have a life here that was my own, even if I was a virtual prisoner.
I stared at him. At the twin reflections of the moon in his steely eyes. At the grim set of his stubbled jaw and the heart-stopping promise of his lips.
“How can I trust you?” I whispered. It was an honest question. But I didn’t know if I could hope for an honest answer.
Was I crazy, or did he actually look pained? “Maybe you can’t. Not yet. But if you let me, I promise, I’ll show you.” He ran his hands down my arms and took my wrists gently, guiding my body once more against his. “I promise.”
“Okay.” I was barely aware I’d said it.
His fingers drifted through my hair, brushing it back from my face. He smiled. “We can win together,” he whispered.
I hesitated. I was so desperate to be done talking. To be kissing him again. But I needed to ask one more thing: “Do you want him back?”
His smile faded. “I don’t care what happens to him. He’s a fucking liar. He told you things he should have kept to himself.”
“But do you want him back?” I repeated.
He squeezed my wrists—not hard. It was as if he were trying to keep himself anchored. He turned away. “I don’t know.” He faced me again and gave a growl of frustration. “He doesn’t mean shit to me. You understand that, right? He’s just…a prop.”
“A prop?” I repeated, growing angry again. A prop, like Mason had been? Did Cole even understand that there were other people in this world, with needs as important as his own?
“Okay, okay. That wasn’t exactly what I meant. But he’s not— You don’t know him.”
“Funny, he said the same about you.”
“Do you want him back?”
I nodded. “Very much.” I was admitting it to myself as well as him. And as I said the words, I felt a sudden emptiness. A sense that I wasn’t going to be complete until Bennett and I found our way back to each other.
Cole sighed resignedly. Tilted his head up to the sky momentarily, then looked back down at me. “Okay. I’ll do whatever I can to help you get him back.”
I stared at him suspiciously. “Why?”
“Because I want to make you happy.”
Could have fooled me, all these months. And yet I believed him now. His face changed when he told the truth. Became softer. More vulnerable.
On an impulse, I kissed him. A quick, chaste kiss. Closed my eyes, begging myself to stay strong. “We should go back in. Callahan has someone doing bed checks on me twice per night. If I’m going to stay, I have to play the good girl.”
He stroked my hair again. “Since when do you have to play the good girl. You are one. Aren’t you?”
I flashed him a smile. “Maybe you don’t know me as well as you think.”
He returned my grin, but it was laced with sadness and a touch of longing. “I want to know you.”
“Maybe you will,” I whispered, kissing him again. “Someday. Let’s go.” I tugged him after me.
“I’ve got blue balls like you wouldn’t believe,” he muttered as we made our way back across the shadowed courtyard.
I laughed. “I thought you wanted to prove to me that you’re thinking about me now. Not yourself.”
“I am thinking of you.” He stopped walking and wound his arms around me from behind, jerking me back against him. I could feel his need against my backside, and my own surge of desire made me gasp softly. My head tilted back against his shoulders, my eyes closing. “You want it as much as I do.”
Maybe so. But right now, I had to focus. “Come on,” I insisted, pulling free.
I grinned to myself as I listened to his resigned footsteps behind me.
Maybe this next semester at Strathmore wasn’t going to be hell after all.
Chapter Twenty-Three
The next day passed quickly. I was in a surprisingly good mood—even to the point of trying to make small talk with Nova as she escorted me to my first class. She glared at me and said nothing. Hey, at least she hadn’t told Callahan that she hadn’t been able to find me at dinner last night to escort me back to my room.
In Algebra, I could feel Cole’s eyes burning into me. But it wasn’t with the hatred he’d once held for me. It was with a desire that sent near-constant shivers up my spine. We’d already made plans for him to sneak up to my room tonight. At lunch, Ian caught my gaze. And while his stare was milder—almost contemplative, worshipful—I knew his desire for me was just as strong as Cole’s.
Bennett was the monitor that meal, but he wouldn’t so much as look at me. Ah well. That was okay. I could be patient. I already had two men at my disposal. I wouldn’t want to get greedy.
Except I was.
I was still fighting a grin on my way to my dorm after rec. I was ready to jump in the shower, then count the minutes until Cole could get up there to join me.
Ainslie materialized at the base of the staircase, just before I reached it. I jumped.
“Here.” She thrust an envelope at me. “Your mail got delivered to our old mailbox.” She sounded disgusted. But she was also
smirking.
I took the envelope hesitantly, keeping an eye on her.
“I just wanted to make sure you got it,” she added, faux-sweetly. “It looks important.”
It was from the prison. I felt instantly sick. Had she opened the letter and read it? Why did she look so knowing?
I pushed past her, opening the envelope as I hurried up the stairs. I pulled out the sheet of paper, immediately recognizing Mason’s chicken-scratch.
Dear Amma,
Good news. My parole hearing went well. I am being released in two weeks. I’m kind of in shock still, thinking about getting out. I really want to see you and mom and dad.
My other good news is that I know the name of the person who put me in here. And believe me, I’m not gonna let them get away with it. They actually used to go to your school—I don’t know if they’re still there. I know I can’t exactly just go out and fuck them up, unless I want to end up right back here. But I’m working on a plan.
My stomach clenched with cold dread. Cole.
I forced myself to keep reading.
Let me know how we can arrange a visit. I’m actually eager to come up to Strathmore—I been kinda seeing a girl there. Well, as much as you can be seeing someone when you’re in prison.
Anyway, just wanted to let you know I’m getting out. And warn you to stay away from the asshole who framed me. Her name’s Meg Jolian, if she’s around. She’s a real piece of shit. Hope you haven’t had to deal with her.
Love you.
Mason.
I stared at the letter, my hand shaking. Meg Jolian?
Who the hell was that?
I’d been so ready to see Cole’s name—not some stranger’s. Cole had been the one… Well, his stepdad, depending on who you believed. But it was Cole’s family, not Bennett’s, that had driven the nail into Mason’s coffin. Cole had as good as admitted it.
So why did Mason think it was this Meg person?
A memory came back to me. Ian had called me Meg. “It would mean so much to me, Meg,” he’d said the night of the talent show. And in the chapel, he’d told Archer, “She sounds a little like Meg.”
My heart thumped.
It could be a coincidence. There were millions of Megs in the world.
And yet…
I set the letter on the windowsill and sank down onto my cot. There was so much I still didn’t know. What had happened that night at the convenience store, when Mason was found in the parking lot with a gun?
What secrets were Cole and Bennett keeping? Why did each one call the other a liar? Why had Cole and his friends been vandalizing the Bakers’ property, and why had Bennett told the cops it was me?
And what was this competitiveness that existed between Ian and Cole? If Meg Jolian was Ian’s Meg…then maybe she was the connection between Ian and Cole.
I needed answers.
It was just a matter of what the answers would cost me.
Would they cost me Cole and Bennett and Ian? If Mason discovered that Cole did have a role in putting him away, would he turn his revenge scheme on the man I was growing to care for? And did Cole deserve it? Maybe I was only willing to let the darkness in him slide because I saw a matching darkness deep within myself.
I let my head rest against the wall.
Then there was Kayle. My one friend, banished from Strathmore. I hadn’t gotten to say goodbye. I hadn’t gotten to say I was sorry. I’d never gotten her story.
The only thing I could do now was stay the course. Work on drawing Bennett back to me. On surviving whatever torments he had in store. Pursuing my burgeoning relationships with Cole and Ian.
And finding out who Meg Jolian was.
The bullies of Strathmore Reform were full of surprises.
But I wouldn’t quit.
I wouldn’t break.
I was ready.
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The Bullies of Strathmore Reform Series
Bullied by the Baseball Captain
Bullied by the Brainiac (pre-order available now)
Bullied by the Bass Player (coming soon)
Bullied by the Bodyguard (coming soon)
About the Author
Jenni Sloane has always been a hopeless romantic. She enjoys writing heroines who find their inner strength, and bad boys with hearts of gold. She has a weakness for stray cats and a fondness for biscuits and gravy. You can usually catch her avoiding the gym and spending too much time reading on the beach.