by Max Hudson
Harvey rolled his eyes. “That doesn't mean I can't be nice to you.”
“I beg to differ.”
“Then, I guess you'll spend the rest of your life begging, huh?”
Evan dropped the paintbrush into the bucket, gooey drops of forest green splattering his already stained jeans. He planted his hands on his hips as he turned to Harvey, his concentrated features quickly shifting to hard frustration.
“I could do without your attitude.”
Harvey shrugged. “So, replace me.”
“We're too short on time for that.”
“If that's the case, stop making such a big matter out of such a small inconvenience. Or would you rather I step aside and leave you with all the work?”
Evan grimaced. “You would like that, wouldn't you?”
“I don't think I'm the one with the attitude.”
“I've got a short fuse today, Harvey.”
Harvey raised his eyebrows curiously. “I can tell. Do you want to talk about it? Maybe getting it out of the way could help.”
Resolute in his offer, he dropped the last of the Christmas lights on the tree and turned to face Evan, crossing his arms. He implored Evan with an inquisitive glance.
“Say whatever you need to say,” he suggested. “Get it all out so we don't end up bickering in front of the kids.”
“I... I don't...”
The look of frustration faded from Evan's face, disappearing as smoothly as the crinkles at the corners of his eyes did when his features relaxed. Soon, his features drooped as did the focus of his gaze. He stared at the floor just in front of Harvey's shoes.
“I don't know how to handle this.”
Harvey shrugged. “Neither do I but pretending like we don't have a problem isn't going to make that problem go away. That's how we ended, remember?”
“When did you become so logical?”
“Three years is a long time to think.”
Evan met Harvey's gaze, a memory twinkling in his irises. He sniffed loudly, gave a curt nod, and dropped his hands from his hips.
“All right,” he sighed. “I think you're a pompous weasel.”
“And I think you're a workaholic.”
Evan looked mildly amused. “Well, I think you're going to destroy that tree just by being near it with your awful holiday attitude.”
“And I think you would shit tinsel if you could.”
“If we survive this, I never want to see you again.”
Harvey cocked his head slightly to the right. “Deal.”
Evan squinted. After a moment, he took a hesitant step forward and extended his hand.
Harvey observed the thick hair on the back of Evan's hand, the waves of lustrous silk pausing just beneath Evan's knuckles. As he reached to take Evan's hand, he felt the breeze billow through the open doorway, ruffling his hair and tickling the hairs on the back of his neck. He met Evan's gaze with a curious wonder, the kind that could have alerted him of an attraction if it hadn't been his ex-husband he was shaking hands with.
He shivered.
Evan raised his eyebrows. “Cold?”
“I'm fine.”
“You were always the first one to get cold during the winter.”
Harvey chuckled lightly, still holding Evan's hand. “You were always a human heater.”
“I suppose that makes me a fine bed partner.”
“And who might the lucky guy be?”
Evan released Harvey's hand, shrinking back to the desk. He shrugged slightly as he bent to lift the paintbrush from the can and applied the bulky bristles to the top of the desk.
“No lucky guy,” he replied softly. “It's just me.”
“I'm surprised by that. I figured you would have replaced me by now.”
“Well, you were hard to replace.”
Harvey froze as he reached into the box of decorations. The tips of his fingers brushed against a particularly cool ornament, a round red ball with shimmering skin that reflected the warm lights glowing around him. He raised his gaze to the man he had spent years attempting to forget. All the nights he had spent alone in his bed with his arms wrapped right around his wiry shoulders assaulted his brain, causing another shiver to trickle down his spine.
He took a shaky breath. “You must not mean that.”
“Mean what?”
“I assume you just mean that I'm hard to replace because there isn't much of a gay scene here in Charleston.”
Evan looked like a deer in headlights. His eyes were focused on the tree, yet he seemed inclined to lean in Harvey’s direction. When his eyes flicked to Harvey, he shrugged lightly and said, “Yeah, that's what I mean.”
“I can't imagine you ever missed me.”
“Not a lot.”
Harvey snorted. “Same. At least we can agree on that.”
But I did miss him, he reflected with a sullen expression as he lifted the ball from the box. He's right—I do get cold first. And every time it gets cold, I think of his body.
“I have an extra jacket, by the way,” Evan offered in a low voice that was nearly lost to the whistling wind outside. “It's in the car.”
“I'll be fine.”
“I can shut the door.”
Harvey hesitated, turning with a confused expression before nodding in the direction of the door. Evan completed the offer, cutting off the biting breeze before it could snuff out the vanilla candle sitting nearby.
“You always loved that scent,” Harvey commented. “Which means I came to hate it.”
“You never liked anything scented.”
“I'm a plain man.”
Evan chuckled lightly. “You're a boring man.”
“Hey, at least I was good at other things.”
“Like what?”
Harvey took a sharp breath, hanging the ball ornament on one of the prickly branches of the tree.
“Well,” he sighed. “I was a good kisser.”
“I mean...”
“You can't deny it, Evan. And with your thick beard, I was one of very few men in the area who would even dare to take on the task of kissing you.”
Evan's face burned red, his smile turning sheepish as he rubbed the back of his head. Harvey laughed as he went to reach for another ornament, catching one of the branches with the sleeve of his puffy coat. The tree followed him as swiftly as a leash being tugged by an excited dog with no owner in sight. Before the tree could engulf Harvey, Evan snatched the branch and lifted it up, righting it in its place.
“Careful,” he warned. “Low budget, remember?”
“Jeez, I'm sorry. I'm still pretty clumsy.”
“You always were.”
Harvey shrugged as he stood upright to make sure the tree wouldn't fall again. As he reached through the fake branches to grab the center, his fingers brushed against Evan's arm. He gripped the center of the tree and cleared his throat. Evan's hand was within reach. Part of him wanted to grab it, and he almost instinctively did so.
“Clumsy,” Evan repeated. “How many ornaments broke that year we had snow flurries?”
“Dozens,” Harvey whispered. “We had to go out and buy new ones.”
“And you still broke the new ones.”
“I can't help that I have an inner ear issue. My balance is off.”
He wobbled slightly. He grabbed Evan's shoulder to steady himself, nearly taking Evan to the ground. As he adjusted his stance, he noticed Evan's proximity, feeling the heat of Evan's breath against his cheek. His eyelids fluttered as he inhaled the familiar scent of Evan's cologne—a delightful mixture of cedarwood with a hint of vanilla.
The memory of that scent made him shudder. It compelled him to react in ways he couldn't control, turning to take Evan's lips before he could even think about it. The feeling of Evan's lips made him feel like he was returning home after a long battle overseas. He searched for Evan's hand, taking it eagerly and gripping it as a way to chase away his instant regret. His heart thumped, his blood pumped, and his cheeks flushed a
s he realized what he was doing.
And he blushed harder when he realized Evan was returning the kiss.
Harvey withdrew, stumbling back. His shoulders met the wall and his eyes focused on Evan, noticing the look of confusion and excitement that reflected his own. He raised his eyebrows curiously, imploring Evan's gaze, searching for the anger that he knew would shortly follow. He had made a huge mistake out of a moment of weakness. He didn't mean to kiss Evan.
But did Evan mean to kiss back?
“Sorry,” he said quickly. “I just...Well, it's been...I didn't mean...”
“Yes, you did.”
Harvey whimpered, “I did miss you.”
“I missed you, too.”
“I'm sorry that I...” Harvey licked his lips, tasting the subtle hint of coffee that had been on Evan's lips. “I should go.”
He rushed to get to the door, taking with him the laundry list of reasons circling in his brain of why he shouldn't have taken such a huge leap. But as he reached for the knob, he heard Evan shift. The floorboards, though they were new, squeaked slightly beneath Evan's weight.
Harvey turned around, witnessing Evan's shy grin.
“Maybe we can do that again,” Evan said. “Tomorrow. After the festival.”
“Maybe.”
Evan shrugged. “It's up to you.”
“I didn't think you...”
“Well, I do. Call it whatever you want—loneliness, desperation, longing—it doesn't matter. Can we do it again?”
Harvey smiled slow and wide, revealing a row of perfectly straight white teeth. He whispered, “Yes, we can do that again.”
Chapter Five
Evan
I didn't think there was anything left with Harvey, Evan considered as he stood in front of the mirror in the office. He adjusted his velvet red coat, tugging the shiny black belt over his gut and fastening it tight. Am I just lonely or was all of that real?
“Wow, you look...incredible.”
Evan shrugged to adjust the coat as he turned around, hooking his fingers into the spacious pockets of the jacket. The bell sitting in his right pocket jingled slightly. He huffed with amusement as he studied Harvey's outfit: the forest green shirt sparkling every time Harvey shifted, the matching green slacks that led to the pointed brown shoes, and the brown vest with a name tag sporting Harvey's title as Santa's helper.
Harvey held up his hat, the same forest green as the rest of his costume, which hosted a bell at the pointed end of it. He tugged it on his head and held out his arms as if presenting a gift to a friend.
“Well?”
Evan smiled. “You look adorable.”
“I look like I'm twelve.”
“It's the curse of being a baby-faced gay man.”
Harvey laughed. “You look like you could be my daddy.”
“Haven't we done that before? During role play?”
“Hush, Evan.”
Evan cackled as he switched his attention back to the mirror, pulling the scarlet cap with white trim over his reddish-brown hair.
Harvey appeared in the mirror behind him holding up a bottle of baby powder. “Now for the most convincing part of your costume.”
“You remembered.”
“Of course, I remembered. It's the same stuff that made me sneeze every time you came home from this damn festival.”
Evan arched his right eyebrow. “It's a damn festival now, huh?”
“It's a damn something that is going to make my ticket go away.”
“And here I thought you were doing this out of the kindness of your heart.”
Harvey smirked. “Maybe I wanted to see you.”
“I find that hard to believe.”
“Not after that kiss.”
Evan pressed his lips together, causing them to nearly disappear as he stifled a crooked smirk and dropped his gaze to the buckle of his belt. When he raised his gaze to Harvey's reflection, he found a hint of mischief in those dazzling hazelnut eyes.
He turned around and jutted his chin. “Go ahead.”
“Ah, I suppose this is part of my duty as your helper.”
“It's in the job description.”
Harvey chuckled as he opened the bottle and began lightly drizzling powder all over Evan's beard. A plume of powder floated toward his nostrils and he squinted, his eyelids fluttering as he took a step back and raised his nose to the ceiling.
“Pink and purple polka dots!” Evan exclaimed. “Don't sneeze!”
Harvey pressed the back of his hand to his nose. When the near-sneeze had passed, he dropped his hand and shook his head.
“Wow,” he sighed. “I can't believe that phrase still works.”
“What can I say? It's magic.”
Harvey laughed. “You're ridiculous. And I can't believe you even still say that. When did you coin that phrase? When we were ten?”
“It was before our teenage years. Mom used to shout it across the house when she heard me gearing up for a sneeze.”
“Your mother was always so sweet and silly.”
Evan grinned. “Yeah, she's a good woman.”
“I miss her.”
“I know you do.”
Harvey raised his eyebrows slightly while focusing on the buttons of Evan's coat. He reached out to play with one, adjusting part of the jacket even though the jacket seemed fine by Evan's inspection. After a fit of blinking, Harvey raised his gaze and smiled. His eyes were glossy.
“Are you ready?”
“As ready as I can be,” Evan admitted. “Are you ready?”
“I took my aspirin. A child can scream in my ear all night and I won't even notice.”
“You're a dork.”
Harvey smirked and winked. “And you're a nerd.”
“Let's get to the cabin before the kids get rowdy.”
Evan led the way from the office to the common area of the building. A collection of elves and helpers were gathered around the coffee table, waiting for their cue. Delbert was waiting for him with a clipboard near the door, wearing a pair of khaki slacks and a green sweater with an obnoxiously colorful Christmas tree plastered on the front.
Delbert smiled wide. “Evan! You look fantastic. Let's get the parade going to the cabin. All right, elves! Line up with Santa! Where's Mrs. Claus?”
The elves and helpers gathered around Evan who guided them out of the doors and onto the gravel path. A woman wearing a matching outfit with white curly locks appeared at Evan's side, taking his left arm. Evan procured the large bell from his pocket and began ringing it, announcing his presence as he walked toward the cabin. A long line of children and parents were already waiting for his arrival with Mrs. Claus, flanked by a half-dozen elves.
As he approached his chair, he greeted the children waiting in line, smiling and waving as they cheered excitedly. He settled into his chair, set down his bell, and gestured widely.
“Merry Christmas, kids!”
“Merry Christmas, Santa!”
He let out a hearty laugh, emphasizing his famous phrase of ho, ho, ho as a few kids were guided by Harvey to Santa’s chair. He pulled one into his lap, asked what they wanted for Christmas, and then posed for a photograph. This process repeated for another couple of hours, never once causing him to lose his spirit or jovial demeanor.
The woman dressed as Mrs. Claus leaned over to whisper into Evan's ear, “We're about done. Want me to get your coffee ready?”
“Yes, Nikki. Thank you.”
She smiled and waved to the remaining children before wandering toward the office. Harvey remained at Evan's side with his smile wavering a bit. He nudged Evan playfully.
“I see you've replaced me already,” he teased. “With a woman.”
Mischief danced in Evan's eyes as he said, “Mind your tongue here, Harvey.”
Harvey chuckled playfully and patted Evan's shoulder. “My apologies.”
“Wow, I've never heard you say that before.”
The last of the kids met Santa and went away with
their parents to see the rest of the festival. As the photographer began packing up, Evan stood from his chair and stretched his arms above his head. He groaned as he felt the muscles in his thighs and back squeal with soreness. His stiff joints popped. He took a breath, puffed up his chest, and invited Harvey to walk with him back to the office.
The warm air coated his cheeks and made his face burn with the chill of winter weather inside the warm building. Nikki handed him a foam cup filled with coffee and he took a sip, sighing gratefully as the liquid settled in his jolly gut.
“You did well,” she praised. “And your helper wasn't bad either.”
“Thank you, Mrs. Claus,” Harvey said. “You did a phenomenal job.”
“If I didn't know better, I'd say you two were close friends. Or even partners. You seemed to work so well together.”
Evan choked on his coffee, covering his mouth as he sputtered over an explanation.
Harvey intercepted and said, “It must be the spirit of the holidays.”
“Must be,” she agreed with a grin. “I'll see you two tomorrow!”
Evan waved as Nikki walked away, waiting until she was gone to shoot Harvey a curious smirk.
“The spirit of the holidays, eh?” he teased. “How about you help me with this suit? My arms are killing me from lifting all those kids.”
“You got it, Santa.”
Evan shook his head as he wandered down the hall to the main office. He shut the door once Harvey was inside, turning to find a pair of lips waiting to pin him in place. He dropped the foam cup that was now half-empty, the sound of it thudding lightly to the ground and interrupting the eager huffs floating from Harvey.
Evan inhaled sharply, welcoming Harvey's cool lips. He cupped Harvey's face and hummed agreeably, each groan echoing back from Harvey's warm mouth. Harvey's tongue poked between his lips and invited him to respond, to playfully push back with his own tongue.
Laughter reverberated beyond the windowpane and reminded him that they weren't alone. He drew back, resting his head against the door as he struggled to open his eyes. He observed Harvey's desirous gaze, lids heavy and eyes affectionately imbibing his image.
“We should relocate,” Evan whispered. “Too many witnesses here.”
“Sorry, I couldn't help it.”
“That's okay. Let's go to my place.”