by S. Nelson
“When?”
“When I rode with you here.” I didn’t mean to, but I glanced down at his crotch.
Gone was the flash of irritation I detected from him. Instead, he seemed amused. “Don’t worry about me. I love having you on my bike.” He handed me my helmet, positioned himself on the bike, then held his hand out to assist me. Once I swung my leg over the other side, I scooted forward and wrapped my hands around his waist, clutching him tightly.
Only this time, I wasn’t nervous about the ride.
I looked forward to pressing against him for as long as I could.
30
The ride back was challenging. The rumble of my bike would often soothe any apprehension I felt, but as it happened the girl molded to me was the source of my anxiety as of late. If I wasn’t trying to make sure she was not only safe but comfortable with us, I was consumed with thoughts of her.
Of her innocence.
Of her ability to distract me with the flick of her eyes.
Of her strength.
I doubted she thought of herself as strong, but she was, in every sense. Most people would’ve crumbled, withdrawn so far into themselves after what she suffered, but not her. Sure, she was timid and shy, but I saw the fire she tried to keep dimmed behind her gaze.
I saw her.
Plain and simple.
And it wasn’t until she uttered that bullshit outside the salon about me being embarrassed of her, that I decided once and for all where she and I stood.
No more messin’ around.
No more fighting my feelings for her.
I saw the way she looked at me, at the way she melded into me whenever we touched.
I wanted Maddie to be mine.
Everyone else thought she was already.
Now it was time for me to step up and make sure that’s what she wanted as well.
From the outside looking in, it might appear that I was rushing things between us. Especially after what she’d endured. But the pull I felt toward Maddie was undeniable and inexplicable. And if she felt the same way, as I suspected she did, then why wait to make the connection between us real?
Once we arrived back at the clubhouse, all I wanted to do was be alone with her, but as luck would have it, I was called into Chambers upon walking inside. Most everyone else sat around the table. Marek nodded when I asked for a minute to escort Maddie back to the room she’d been staying in.
Leaving her tucked safely inside, I walked back down the hall and toward our meeting room, hating the time spent away from her, even if for only a short while. The image of her bombarded my every thought, and without realizing it, I soon walked right into a wall. Or to be more specific, a wall of a man. Brick grabbed my shoulder when I bounced off him, laughing at my clumsiness.
“I was gonna say somethin’ to you, warn you I was standing right here, but I thought it would be funnier if I didn’t.”
“Nice,” I grumbled.
“Whatcha thinkin’ about?” Before I answered, he looked back toward where the bedrooms were housed. “Never mind.” I thought possibly Maddie had come out of her room, but when I didn’t see her there, I realized Brick was fuckin’ with me. “She sure does look good.” Confused about whether his compliment was innocent or not, I chose to ignore him. I had enough on my mind. I didn’t need to add punching the mammoth of a man to it.
“Let’s go before Marek sends someone lookin’ for us.” I walked around him, deposited my cell on the table outside Chambers, and eventually took my seat next to Trigger, Brick following closely and sitting to my left in his assigned chair.
Marek leaned back in his seat, running a hand over his face in what appeared to be frustration. He had a lot on his plate as it was, and me bringing Maddie here had only intensified the situation.
After he came clean about all the past dealings with the club, I felt even worse about engaging the Reapers, but even through my guilt, I wouldn’t have changed a thing.
My concern for her, even when I didn’t know her, had continuously plagued me, and every time I saw her with them, it was like a knife to my gut. It was a no-brainer when their prospect shoved her at me during our last fight.
“Tag.” One word garnered everyone’s attention, especially mine and Kaden’s. Sitting upright, my focus solely on our leader and shoving the errant thoughts of Maddie to the back of my mind, I listened intently to the words that followed. “I gotta take care of some stuff first, but at the end of the week, I’m goin’ to the safe house, putting all this to rest once and for all. And I want you, you, and you there as well,” he said, looking at Ace, his son, and me. “Cutter will be there, too. Everyone else will remain behind. We still don’t know what the hell is goin’ on with the Reapers, and I don’t want to pull too many people away from here. God forbid anything go down, we’re an hour away.”
“What’s gonna happen once we get there?” I asked, completely aware I pushed against his patience. He didn’t answer, so I closed my mouth, knowing if I continued to ask questions, forcing him to speak more on the subject when he clearly didn’t want to, I’d be on the receiving end of one pissed-off man. Not wanting to cause any more upset than there already was inside our club, I simply nodded when he arched his brow at me.
“We should ask Mom what she thinks about all this,” Kaden suddenly blurted. Apparently, he didn’t mind pushing his ol’ man’s buttons. And while I was relieved he spoke up, I wasn’t looking forward to the fallout. If the change in Marek’s demeanor was any indication, we were all gonna feel the hit any second.
“What did you say?” Prez’s expression morphed from astonishment to confusion to fury in the span of seconds, his grip on the edge of the table frightening. I had to give Kaden credit for the size of his balls, though. Not only did he have to deal with Stone’s anger toward him constantly now that he was with my sister, but he had no qualms about adding his father’s outrage to the list.
“Sounds to me like you’ve made up your mind about Tag, and you want me and Linc to go along with it, possibly even witness his death.” Kaden would’ve continued to vomit his words, but Marek slammed his hand down on top of the table so hard it was a wonder he didn’t flinch in pain.
Ignoring his son’s ranting, he repeated, “What the fuck did you just say?!” The room became eerily quiet.
“I think we should ask Mom what—”
Marek stood so fast, his chair skidded behind him and hit the wall, the thump causing me to wince even though I was already on edge and paying close attention to what was unfolding.
“I told you what that fucker did to her!” he shouted. “Do you think for one second I’m gonna tell her about any of this? Remind her what happened to her all those years ago? Let her know Vex’s son is at our safe house? That he infiltrated our club? That he was close, too close to her?”
“But Tag is innocent,” Kaden replied, tripping over his words when his father moved closer to him.
Admittedly, Marek wasn’t making a hell of a lot of sense, speaking as if Tag was indeed guilty, that he was as evil as Vex, which wasn’t the case. The only thing I understood was that Marek wanted to keep Sully as far from this shit as possible, which I couldn’t blame him for, but a man’s life hung in the balance. At what point did you put someone’s emotional state at risk to save someone else?
“It doesn’t matter,” Prez yelled, first at his son, then at the rest of us. “I’m not bringing my wife into this. She won’t know a goddamn thing about what’s goin’ on here.” He pointed at his son, then snarled. “Don’t you even think about tellin’ her, Kaden. She will NOT find out about this.” This was the first time I’d seen Marek not only enraged but fearful as well. His eyes darkened, but a look of panic flashed over his face. It was brief, but I saw it.
“Remember the last time you hid stuff from Sully?” Ryder asked, leaning back when Marek swung his focus onto him.
“That was different.”
“How?”
“It just was. I couldn’t tell h
er that back then, not when I didn’t know if it was true or not.”
“Yeah, but do you remember how hurt she was? How distraught she became?” Jagger asked. What are they talkin’ about? “You almost lost her, Prez. Don’t make that same mistake again.”
“What the hell is wrong with all of you? Do you not remember the vile things they did to her?”
“We do.” Trigger replied that time. “But maybe the boy’s right,” he said, referring to Kaden’s request.
Having no idea what they were talkin’ about, I spoke up again. “If Tag’s life hangs in the balance, all because of what his father did to Sully, isn’t it fair for Sully to then weigh in on what happens to him?”
“No!” Marek shouted. “No.” He shook his head, hitting the top of the table once more.
“You did promise her,” Tripp said.
“Promise her what?” Ace asked. “What are you guys talkin’ about?”
My ol’ man looked to his best friend before opening his mouth to respond. Marek didn’t give his silent approval with a nod, but he gave it when he sat back down and threw his head back, stealing his eyes from everyone at the table.
“Before we killed Psych, he decided to mess with Marek one last time.” Our VP took a quick breath. “He told us that the reason the war started between our clubs in the first place was because he’d raped Marek’s mother, and that wasn’t the worst part. He then insinuated that Marek and Sully were half brother and sister.”
“You’re related?” Kaden uttered, his mouth dropping open at the shock.
“No, they’re not related. It was Sully’s father’s last-ditch effort to fuck with Marek before he died. But while we waited to find out for sure… let’s just say he didn’t handle things with his wife so well.”
“I didn’t,” Marek finally spoke up. “And I did promise not to hide anything like that from her again, but I can’t… I can’t bring myself to tell her about Tag, reminding her about Vex.” He shook his head vigorously. “I won’t.”
“You might not have a choice,” my ol’ man said, clutching his friend’s shoulder in a show of support.
I wasn’t sure what was gonna happen once we left this room, but one thing was for sure, whether Sully was told about Tag or not, I didn’t believe Marek was ever gonna be the same.
31
“Are you all right?” Lincoln walked into the bedroom looking tired and beat down, a frown marring his gorgeous face. “Bad meeting?”
“You could say that.”
“Do you wanna talk about it?” I moved from the bed and walked up in front of him, reaching for his hand, which he readily gave. “I’m a good listener.”
“Thanks, but it’s club business. Nothing I can discuss with you.” He pulled away from me and disappeared inside the bathroom, reemerging moments later and taking a seat. When I sat next to him, wanting to offer him any support I could, he pulled me onto his lap, hiding his face in the crook of my neck. The action surprised me, but only seconds later, I melted into his touch. He wrapped his arms around my waist and held me prisoner, but I wasn’t about to complain. In fact, I preferred this position rather than sitting next to him.
Lincoln didn’t scare me.
His touch made my heart skip a beat.
His kiss had made my stomach flip.
The way he looked at me made my soul hurt because it had taken me so long to find him.
“Is this okay?” he grumbled, his words muffled against my neck.
“Of course.”
“Of course,” he echoed, breathing me in like he was trying to commit my scent to memory. Then he said something I never expected. “I need you.”
Our eyes weren’t connected, which was good because I was sure I looked odd with the way mine widened at his confession.
“You do?”
Lincoln finally moved back and looked at me. “I do. More than I want to.”
“What does that mean?” I had no idea what he was gonna tell me, but whatever his response, I believed there was no going back for me. Not that I wanted to. With my own thoughts confusing me, my brain barely had time to register his response.
“I don’t know.”
“Oh.” Disappointment covered me like a shroud.
Moments passed, and neither of us spoke another word nor made a move. I wondered if he cared for me other than as someone he saved. Did he feel something deeper for me as I did for him? Could I love someone I barely knew? Was it possible for feelings to develop that quickly? Or was I feeling something else entirely for Lincoln?
I didn’t dare voice the craziness rattling around inside my head. Instead, I remained as still as I could because I didn’t want our physical connection to break. But several moments after he’d pulled me to sit on his lap, he set me on the bed beside him.
“Are you in the mood for some Chinese?”
“Sure.” I watched him walk across the small room, entranced with the simple way in which he moved. His stride was typically confident, sexy, but today his gait was different. I couldn’t explain such a thing, but whatever plagued Lincoln affected every part of him. I only wished there was something I could do to help, all without knowing the issue.
“Do you want anything in particular or wanna leave it up to me?”
“You can choose. That’s fine with me.”
“Okay. I’ll be back soon.”
The second he was gone, I missed him. I could barely inhale a breath. It was alarming how much I’d become used to his presence that when he left, he seemed to take the air with him.
If what I felt for him was something other than love, I’d hate to know how messed up I’d be if I ever fell hard.
“Are you sure you don’t want more?” he asked, sliding the container toward me. I would’ve been content eating in the room, but he convinced me to join the land of the living, so we sat at the bar. And since most of the guys weren’t here, I agreed. That’s not to say I didn’t like his friends. They’d been nothing but nice and respectful. But I preferred solitary with Lincoln over anything.
“I guess I wasn’t as hungry as I thought.”
“We gotta fatten you up, woman,” he teased, winking at me right before I looked down at myself. I wore one of the maxi dresses Riley had given me, and while it was comfortable, the size was a bit big.
“You think I’m too skinny?” I hadn’t meant to sound so self-conscious, but how Lincoln perceived me was important. I know it shouldn’t be, but I couldn’t halt my inner voice from rambling how he might not find me attractive at my current weight, which admittedly was under what I should be, what I’d been in the past.
“I think you’re beautiful, Maddie. Get outta your own head.” I reached for the container, but he pulled it away before I could grab it. “If you’re not hungry, you’re not hungry. Don’t force yourself to do something because you took my joke the wrong way.” I licked my lips. “Don’t do that.”
“Do what?”
“Wet your lips.”
“Why?”
“Because I want to.”
Heat bloomed in my belly. “Oh.” I looked at my lap before picking my head back up, his gaze simmering against mine for the longest seconds of my life. “You do?”
“I can’t get that kiss out of my head.”
“You can’t?”
“You only gonna use one or two words to answer me?”
“No.” I smiled when he smirked. “I don’t know what you want me to say. I think about the kiss all the time, too.”
“That’s promising.” Lincoln finished his beer and slid it forward on the bar. “Wanna go back to the room now?” My mind drifted off, but before I could lose myself to all the different scenarios of why he asked that question, he caressed the side of my face. “I only meant that we could watch a movie or something. In private.”
Two of his friends walked toward us as we vacated our seats. “Where ya goin’?” Kaden asked, occupying the stool to my left.
“We’re gonna watch a movie,” Lincoln
replied, resting his hand on the small of my back.
“Why not watch one out here? This TV is huge.” Ace was the one talking now. “What movie you got? Maybe we want to see it, too.” If I wasn’t mistaken, I thought I saw the corner of his lip curve upward when Lincoln shook his head. “Oh, you wanna be alone. Is that it? I can respect that. I’d love to be alone with a certain someone, but I guess she’d have to answer her phone in order for any of that shit to happen.”
“Oh, no,” Kaden griped. “Linc, don’t leave me alone with his sullen ass.”
“Fuck you, man. I’m not sullen. I’m horny.” Ace flicked his eyes at me. “No offense, Maddie. But it’s true.”
“Is it Chelsea you’re talkin’ about?” I asked, surprised I allowed myself to be so forward.
“Yeah.” He moved his head up and down before shaking it side to side. “Wait. How do you know?”
“I guessed from the interaction you had with her earlier today. There seemed like somethin’ was goin’ on with you two.”
“Oh yeah. Can you believe she—”
“Okay. That’s enough.” Lincoln gently pushed me forward. “How did you go from hardly ever discussing anything about you and Chelsea to her being the only topic? Hash it out with her or let it go, Ace. Stop goin’ back and forth already. It’s exhausting for the rest of us.”
Ace mumbled something behind us, but we were too far away now for me to hear what it was.
“He seems like he’s havin’ a hard time. If you wanna go talk to him, I don’t mind.” I opened the bedroom door and stepped inside, Lincoln right behind me. I barely made it two feet before he turned me around and crushed me to him, dipping his head low so we were eye level.
“I don’t wanna talk to Ace. I wanna hang out with you.”
He pressed his lips to mine, and what I thought was gonna be a peck on the mouth turned into something else altogether.
Bunching his shirt in my hands, I yanked him closer and devoured the sweet taste of him. I groaned into his mouth, my breaths stolen the longer we kissed. All sorts of images rushed through my head, mainly of us naked and writhing around on the bed, which was situated only a few feet from where we stood.