Broken Beats: An Illusion Series Novel

by D. Kelly

  Anna bites her lip. “Well, I’m going to the school on Monday to see if I can still enroll Jake. We decided private school isn’t the path we want to take after all. Since it’s not our home district, though, I’m not sure if they’ll squeeze him in. Keep your fingers crossed for us.”

  Darren looks at me and raises a brow. “Do you have any insight?”

  “Oh, do you have kids in the school too?” Anna asks excitedly.

  “No, but I work there. Tell them your niece and nephew have been placed with Miss Marina for kindergarten. Emphasize the fact you’re choosing their school over private school—Principal Lewis loves hearing that. If things haven’t changed since last week, there should still be openings for kindergartners.”

  Anna squeals. “That would be a Godsend. I don’t know what I was thinking not enrolling him with his cousins.”

  “You weren’t.” Darren shrugs, fighting a grin.

  Anna bumps her shoulder against his chest. “Don’t be mean to me or I’ll tell Mel not to make you sweet potatoes at Thanksgiving, Christmas, Easter, or …”

  “You wouldn’t dare.”

  She arches a perfect brow at him. “Try me.”

  Darren laughs, reaches for my hand, and kisses the top of her head. “I love you. Come for dinner this week, okay?”

  “A day I don’t have to cook? You don’t have to ask me again. Let me know what day and we’ll be there. Haddie, will you be there too?”

  “No, I don’t plan to meet Cadence for a long while.”

  Anna blinks slowly as if confused. “Is it because you work at Cadence’s school?”

  I look to Darren, and he crinkles his nose as if he doesn’t like my answer either. I want him to take this question and not make me look like a bitch to his friends.

  “No, it’s because meeting a child before a relationship is stable and committed isn’t a good idea. It’s not fair to put her through the pain of losing a bond if Darren and I don’t work out.”

  “Huh.” Anna shrugs. “You guys have to do you, so I get it, but I’ve never known Darren to make a move he wasn’t already sure about five steps before he takes it. However it plays out, I hope I’ll be seeing more of you, Haddie. Meeting you made my day.”

  “It was nice meeting you too.”

  Darren motions to me to step into the inner studio and leads the way until we’re about halfway down the hall. He opens the door to a room where a little boy is playing guitar as people watch from the couches.

  I look around and notice all the kid-sized equipment—guitars, drums, miniature keyboards, even a small piano. There are other instruments like maracas, tambourines, harmonicas, bongos, and ukuleles. He could run an entire music program here. Then again, with all the kids they have, that might be what they’re doing.

  The little boy playing is talented for his age.

  “That’s Jake, Wyatt and Anna’s oldest,” Darren whispers in my ear.

  “He’s flawless,” I whisper back, and he nods.

  When the song is over, everyone claps as Jake puts the guitar on its stand. “Dad, I’m starving can we eat now?”

  The man next to him smiles. “Yes, we can eat. Go say hi to Uncle Darren and then tell your mom to pack up Bray.”

  The little boy runs up to Darren with a smile and high-fives him. “Did you hear that, Uncle D? I got it right this time!”

  “We told you all that practice would pay off. Too bad Nate and Cadence weren’t here to play with you.”

  “Yeah, Uncle Sawyer said they went to church with Grandma V. I was supposed to go, but we had to go shopping for school.” Jake scrunches his eyes and looks at Darren holding my hand.

  Shit.

  He looks back up at me. “Who are you?”

  I bump Darren with my shoulder. He turns to me, and I raise a brow to encourage him to answer.

  Darren takes the hint. “Jake, this is Haddie.”

  His dad comes closer with a huge smile on his face while Sawyer talks to the men on the couch.

  Jake looks up at me. “Are you a singer too?”

  “No, I’m afraid I don’t sing very well, but I used to play the piano when I was a little girl.”

  “That’s cool. That’s what I want to learn next. Do you think you can teach me?”

  Wyatt laughs and places his hands on Jake’s shoulders. “It’s not polite to ask big favors of people we don’t know well. Don’t worry, we’ll find you a great teacher. Go tell your mom we’re almost ready.”

  “Okay, Dad. See you later, Uncle D!”

  Jake runs from the room, and Wyatt extends his hand to me. “I’ve heard a lot about you, Haddie. I’m Wyatt.”

  I take his hand. “It’s nice to meet you. Your son is very talented.”

  “Thank you. I hate to meet and run, but we need to feed the kids. I hope to see you again soon, Haddie.” Wyatt pats Darren on the shoulder and leaves.

  Sawyer stands, and the two men follow. “Now that Jake has finished showing you his skills, how about we take this to the studio and lay down some tracks?”

  Darren and I step aside and then follow them down the hall to the last door.

  One of the men whistles. “This is impressive. No wonder Shawn and Eli have been singing your praises.”

  Darren releases my hand and steps forward. “Good to see you again, Ryder.”

  “You too, man. It’s been too long.”

  They do the whole man-hug-back-slap thing before Darren swings his gaze toward me.

  “This is my girlfriend, Haddie Davidson.”

  Sawyer’s eyes widen, and my heart stutters again. I try to recover quickly as Ryder smiles at me.

  “Ryder Stone. It’s nice to meet you, Haddie.” He holds out his hand to me, and I shake it as Darren places his arm around my waist possessively.

  His friend steps up and holds out his hand next. “Shawn Lucas. It’s a pleasure to meet you. Are you a musician too?”

  I shake my head and release his hand. “No, I’m a psychologist.”

  “She’s a professional,” Ryder says to Shawn, and I tilt my head in curiosity.

  Shawn grins at me. “Sorry, sometimes it’s surreal when women don’t get excited when they recognize us. When it happens, Ryder and I tend to speculate as to why.”

  Sawyer laughs. “Darren and I used to do that too, but we would place bets on whether they were faking or they really didn’t care who we were.”

  I look at Darren, and he blushes and shrugs awkwardly. “We were young and dumb, what can I say?”

  “I’m a bit of an enigma,” I reply. “I like music. If you tell me some of your songs or your band, I might recognize it, but I don’t follow gossip or celebrities with the exception of David Beckham. I could be standing next to one of the most famous musicians in the world and not have a clue who they are.”

  Sawyer snorts. “For those of you not in on the joke, that’s how she met Darren.”

  We all have a good laugh, and the four of them excuse themselves for a minute to check out the inside of the studio. My heart fills with pride as I take in all the awards and platinum and gold records hanging on the walls.

  Darren has accomplished so much at such a young age. I know things were cut short because of the accident, but it seems like they lived a lifetime of dreams in the time they had.

  “Impressive, isn’t it?”

  I turn my head to find Mel smiling at me. “It’s incredible. They should all be so proud.”

  “They are when they allow themselves to be. It’s hard for them to have so much and still be missing one of the key people who helped make them who they are.”

  “I’m sorry for your loss. Darren talks fondly of Noah and Belle all the time.”

  Mel motions to the couch, and we take a seat. Watching the men through the glass wall as they talk animatedly brings a smile to her face.

  “Earlier, I wanted to talk more and tell you I’m happy for you two. It’s not easy finding someone who understands the gravity of your loss. Darren has had a r
ough time since Belle left us. I hope the two of you heal each other the way Sawyer and I have,” she says sincerely.

  “Belle was your best friend?”

  “More like my sister. When my parents died, and then my grandma, Veronica treated me like her own. She pretty much did before, but that solidified it. You’ll like her when you meet her. She’s amazing.”

  I rub my hands against my jeans—just thinking about meeting Belle’s mom freaks me out.

  Mel reaches across and grabs my hand. “We’re not ordinary people. This family fights for each other. We push through the difficult issues and make sure our own are taken care of.”

  “It’s a lot to take in. I come from a small family.”

  Mel smiles. “Me too. I judged them before I met them, but I try not to do that to people now. I could’ve missed out on knowing these amazing men. They’re special. They are hands-down the nicest, most caring people I’ve ever had the privilege of knowing.”

  “How did you find your footing?”

  “It wasn’t as difficult as you’d think. They’re patient and loving, and they’re excellent at bringing you into the fold. I won’t lie, they’re also overwhelming and at times overbearing. They talk through everything and give sound advice. When this family pulls you in, embrace it. I promise it will be the best thing you’ve ever done for yourself.”

  Darren waves at me through the window, and I wave back. Mel watches us closely, almost as if she’s assessing our every move.

  “Does it bother you he’s dating again, Mel?”

  “I’m ecstatic. Darren is my brother now and one of my best friends. I know how you must feel, though, so don’t be afraid to ask questions or just talk to me.”

  She looks at her husband like a lovesick puppy, and when he blows her a kiss, she doubles over in laughter. “Sorry,” she says, catching her breath, “it’s an inside joke. Wyatt and Anna blow kisses all the time, and they all make fun of them. When Sawyer is feeling silly, he’ll do it just to see my reaction. It makes me laugh every time.”

  “Oh, gotcha. Mel, do you know why Darren called me his girlfriend when he introduced me to those guys?”

  Mel sighs. “Do you want the truth?”

  “Nothing but.”

  “I think he was staking a claim. Letting his alpha side out. If he didn’t mean it or want it, he wouldn’t have said it. The guys know what they want, they go for it, and they get it.”

  Taking a deep breath, I exhale slowly. “I see.”

  “Haddie, if you like Darren half as much as he likes you, lean into that feeling and go with it. Fear holds us back, but somehow life always brings us full circle to what was meant to be. ‘The only way out, is through.’ From the day Noah died until the day I married Sawyer, their mom drilled that into my head.” Turning sideways, she lifts her shirt and reveals the text tattooed up the side of her body. “It became such a big part of me, I made it permanent.”

  “It’s so hard though.”

  She nods. “Saying goodbye to the past and diving headfirst into the future is scary. Perhaps I’m biased, but Darren is special. He doesn’t love easily, so if he’s falling for you, there must be something special about you as well.”

  “Princess, are you causing trouble?” Sawyer leans against the doorframe and stares at Amelia like she’s his entire world.

  “Only the best kind,” she replies with an innocent smile.

  Something hits me in the feels like a tidal wave. I want what they have—desperately.

  13

  DARREN

  “Did I freak you out back there? Is that why you’re so quiet?”

  Haddie has been silent since we left the studio. I open the sliding glass door, and she follows me into the living room. Once we’re comfortable on the couch, she turns to me.

  “I’m confused. Is that what you want?”

  “What do you mean?”

  “You told them I was your girlfriend and acted kind of jealous when they looked at me. Do you want to be exclusive?”

  “Would it scare you away if I said yes?”

  She flashes me a beautiful smile. “No, but I still want to take this slowly.”

  Moving to sit across from her on the coffee table, I reach for her hands. “I’m willing to go as slowly as you’d like, but …”

  “It’s about what Anna said, isn’t it? About Cadence?”

  “I think there’s another aspect we neglected to consider. You’ve met most of my family, nephews and niece included. It’s not exactly fair to Cadence, and if Jake says something to her, I don’t want her to be confused or have hurt feelings.”

  Haddie sighs softly as she laces our fingers together. “Either way, it’s a risk, but I agree we should’ve thought ahead when it came to the kids. I don’t ever want to be the cause of your daughter's pain.”

  I move quickly from the table to the floor and drop to my knees. I pull her mouth to mine and devour her like a starving man. The flavor of her intoxicates me, and I want so much more. I want to dip my tongue between her thighs and taste and tease her until she explodes on my tongue. I’ll never get tired of kissing Haddie, but we still need to talk, and we’re running out of time.

  I pull myself away from her and take a deep breath. “Thank you for thinking of Cadence first.”

  “I’d hope anyone would think of a child first and foremost. I think you should warm her up to the idea though. Let her adjust to school before you talk about how she would feel if you dated. She probably doesn’t even understand what it means.”

  I mull over her words. The kids are six; they don’t have any clue what dating is. We need to have an important conversation before she meets my daughter, but now is not the time. We’ve covered too much emotional shit today to add anything else to the mix.

  “Agreed.” I kiss her hand. “And as much as I’d love to spend more of the day with you, they’re going to be home from church soon.”

  She sighs. “It’s okay. I need to go home and get ready for work tomorrow. First day jitters and all.”

  “Me too. If you see Mel bawling and me tearing up tomorrow, just ignore us.”

  “You’re pretty hard to ignore, but I’ll do my best to try. The moms are going to love you and Sawyer. I bet we see less pajamas and frazzled women this year.”

  Her lustful gaze is an aphrodisiac straight to my cock.

  I tilt my head and look at her curiously. “Are you the jealous type?”

  “I’m not sure. I’ve never been that way before, but I imagine seeing women throw themselves at you won’t make me feel great.”

  “Yeah, about that … I have to be nice, friendly, and open to conversation. If you see it and it bothers you, talk to me about it and remind yourself it’s not flirting. Treat it like business. I’m a lot of things, but one thing I’ll never be is a cheater.”

  “I’ll keep that in mind.”

  I stand and pull her to her feet. “I’m glad you came over today.”

  “Me too, even though I had to show you my scars.”

  “Your scars only enhance your beauty. Don’t let anyone ever tell you differently.”

  She inhales sharply, and I kiss her, hoping to drive my point home. When we break apart, I walk her to her car.

  “I’ll call you later after I get Cadence down. Well … I’ll try. This is the first night she and Nate are sleeping separately. I’m not sure how it will go, but if I can’t call, I’ll at least text.”

  “Enjoy your night,” she replies as I close her car door for her.

  I wave as she pulls out of my driveway and Veronica pulls into Sawyer and Mel’s drive. That was close.

  “DADDY, ARE YOU ALMOST DONE?” Cadence squirms on the chair, and if she could hold still for five more seconds, I’d be finished with her hair.

  Thank God for Veronica and Mel. Without their help, she’d look like a ragamuffin all the time. It took a few weeks to get it down, but now I can do her hair just as well as they can.

  “Hold still and count to ten.�
��

  As she counts, I yawn. Last night was a long one. Sleeping alone was not easy for her, but once she finally fell asleep, she was down for the count.

  “All done, Cady. Let’s get your backpack and your lunch and go see if Nate is ready.”

  She jumps off her chair and dashes out of the room. I don’t remember much about my first day of school, but I’m pretty sure I was never excited about it. Belle’s genes are shining through. Thinking of her puts me in a solemn mood. Last time, I screwed up and fucked Rory, but I’m determined to have a better outlook on things this go-around.

  “Daddy, come on!” Cadence impatiently calls out from the front door.

  The moment she sees me, she throws it open and runs to Sawyer’s house. Mac and Ryan are waiting by the SUVs to drive us. We aren’t sure if it will get a little crazy, but the plan is to park a block over and walk up. If there’s an issue, they’ll come get us.

  Mel, Sawyer, and the kids are all outside, and Mel swipes at her tears as she takes photos. My phone vibrates, and when I see the text notification, I smile.

  Haddie: Are you crying yet?

  I’m not, but Mel is. I’m a bit melancholy, but Cady is happy.

  I snap a few pictures of her and Nate and debate on sending them for about half a second. If Haddie is going to be part of my world, I should be able to share moments like these with her. I send the photos, and she replies instantly.

  Haddie: They’re adorable, and Cadence’s hair is gorgeous.

  Thanks. My hairstyling skills are better now than they were three years ago.

  Haddie: You did her hair? High-five. That’s impressive.

  She’s my little girl; there isn’t anything I wouldn’t do for her. Maybe I’ll see you soon?

  Haddie: Maybe only a glimpse across campus. Text me if you need me to sneak you some tissues.

  Have a good first day. I’ll talk to you soon.

  After tucking my phone in my pocket, I take the travel mug of coffee Sawyer offers me.

  “Thanks.”

  “No problem. If Cadence was as hard to put down as Nate was last night, you’re going to need it.”