“I’ll pack my bag,” he said, recognizing the futility of arguing with her.
“I’ll say thanks before you go.” Cora held out her hand to him, businesslike. “You saved their lives, and you’ll always have my gratitude for that.”
He took her hand, wanting to draw her in for a kiss, but he was afraid to, afraid of the rejection that would come.
“I’ll be out of here by morning.” He dropped her hand, breaking the connection between them. “The security cameras will take longer. It’ll take some time to dismantle everything.”
“You know your way around.” Her tone wasn’t cold, but it was final. “I’m going to bed.”
Twenty-Six
“So good to see you.” Annie Harkness came through the front door and gave Cora a hug. “Everything’s okay now that things have settled down?”
“All better,” Cora replied.
With whoops of joy, Jimmy and Jackson joined the triplets in the living room, romping on the sofas. Since the outside temperature was scorching, they’d set up a little camp inside.
“Paige’s cast is gone,” Annie commented, her eyes on the kids.
“She’s completely healed, no long-term effects or follow up appointments.” Cora had taken the girls to the doctor’s office the day before. Paige was joyful to be cast free, but by the time Cora got all three there, waited for a half-hour to see the doctor, sat through the appointment and then got the girls back to the car, she’d been exhausted
“That’s lucky. No broken bones for my boys yet.” Annie eyed Jackson as he leaped off the sofa. “It’ll come, I’m sure.”
“I hope not, for your sake. Caring for an injured child was harder than I thought it would be.”
“You have help now at least.” Annie took a look around. “Where is the handsome William?”
Cora winced. She’d been alone with the girls for the past four days, information she hadn’t passed onto her friend yet. She hadn’t wanted to talk about it since she was struggling to adjust to how empty the house felt without him.
“William’s not here anymore.” Cora made herself say the words in a nonchalant voice.
When Annie looked at her, sympathy in her gaze, Cora managed a little smile.
“That’s not right,” her friend said, instantly concerned. “He shouldn’t be able to just go, leaving you to do everything.”
Cora appreciated Annie’s desire to come to her defense, but she had to be honest.
“He didn’t choose to leave. I asked him to.” Forced him to go was more like it. She’d pushed him away before he could walk away. From the beginning, she’d expected he would fulfill his duty and leave. He’d completed the job the Lawrences hired him to do. He was free to leave. She’d just sped that process along. Made a clean break before he could break her heart any more.
“Can we go outside?” Melody rushed up to Cora and asked, with the other kids right behind her.
“It’s really hot out there,” Cora waffled.
“We could play in the sprinkler,” Paige suggested. Since she’d gotten her cast off, she’d been ready to run. Cora let her because she had the doctor’s okay.
“I brought swim trunks for my boys just in case,” Annie volunteered. “I’m game.”
“Okay. Upstairs to change, girls.” Cora followed as they dashed up the steps. By the time she’d gotten them into swimsuits and coated with sunscreen, she was ready for a cool drink and some time in the shade.
“I took the liberty,” Annie said when Cora went out the kitchen door to the terrace. Her friend had a pitcher of lemonade from the fridge sitting on a table under an umbrella.
“Bless you.” Cora turned on the faucet, sending the sprinkler into a long arc, before she dropped into a chair.
“Having another adult in the house full-time was good for you.” Annie lifted her glass of lemonade and took a sip.
“I know.” Cora watched the kids dash under the spray. Being alone again with the three girls was more than a full-time job. She missed William at night when the girls wanted a song, and she missed him in the morning when she was no longer able to take a shower without wondering what mischief the kids were in to. She hadn’t realized how much she’d come to depend on him.
“I worry about you being alone with the girls.”
“I have a good friend I can call if I get in over my head.” Cora tried for a smile.
“Anytime,” Annie confirmed, “but I still wish William were here for your sake.”
She needed to be firm or Annie would keep at it out of concern for her. “The job was over for him, so there was no reason for him to stay.”
“Did you ask him to?” Annie’s question was a gentle but unexpected pry.
No, Cora thought, she’d practically packed his bags. “Give Jackson a turn,” Cora called when Melody bumped him from the line.
“Did you?” Annie prompted.
“No. Like I said, I asked him to go.”
“That must have been a difficult conversation.”
“We didn’t really talk about it much.” She’d basically stonewalled him.
“Cora,” Annie put her glass on the table, “you didn’t talk it through at all, did you?”
“What was there to say?” Cora fought to control her emotions. “He was going to leave. If not that night, then soon. It was easier just to do it quickly.”
Cora tried for a casual shrug. “He wasn’t my boyfriend after all. The relationship wasn’t going anywhere. If it had been, he might have come up with some reason to stay.” In her defense, she added, “I did ask him to convince me why he should continue living here.”
“And what did he say?”
“Nothing,” she whispered. The silence that night in the foyer had nearly killed her. She’d given him a chance to plead his case, and he’d said not one word. She’d hoped he would come into her bedroom later to talk with her. She’d laid awake most of the night, listening to his soft footfalls as he’d moved through the house packing up the cameras and equipment.
At four in the morning, she’d heard the front door close for the final time, turned into her pillow and cried. Her tears were for herself, but for the girls as well as she realized just how much they would miss him. His trip into the nursery was heartbreaking. She listened through the monitor to his whispered goodbye to each girl. He’d told Paige to always be strong. “Keep being happy” was his advice to Melody. He’d wished farewell to Haley last, telling her to shine as bright as the stars at night. She could hardly think about his words without tears coming to her eyes.
“Have you talked to him since?” Annie must have read Cora’s despondent expression. “Maybe he just needed time to think. Hadn’t he just gotten the bad guy?”
That was true. She’d forced him out the same day that Francis had been captured. If she’d waited a day…Cora shook her head, dismissing the thought. He had her number and she had his, but neither had made the effort to communicate.
“Jimmy Harkness, don’t you dare,” Annie called as her son lifted the sprinkler to shoot it right in Paige’s face.
The kids were giggling in delight, the sky was bright blue, and Cora had a friend and a glass of lemonade, but happiness eluded her. Knowing that she may have been the one to shove it away with both hands compounded her misery.
“I’ll go prepare a snack. I think today calls for cookies,” Cora got up, using the excuse to avoid answering her friend’s questions.
* * *
That night, Cora lay awake staring at her ceiling. She’d read until her eyes blurred, trying to soothe herself to sleep, but it wouldn’t come. She was lonely. She missed having William’s body taking up more than half her bed, as he had on many occasions. He hadn’t always stayed the entire night with her, but he had been with her enough that the bed felt empty without him.
Everything bad comes out at night. Wasn’t that what William said about the girls’ nightmares? It was true for Cora because she was second-guessing her decisions when it came to h
im. Why had she pushed him away so quickly? She’d asked him to convince her of why he should stay, but had she given him time to think?
And she saw now that she’d been unfair, expecting him to do that while his mind was still half on the mission.
A knock sounded on her door, making her heart leap. Had William returned? He had a key and the security code. Girls’ laughter in the hall told her who her guests were. Haley and Paige had learned how to climb out of their cribs thanks to Melody’s instructions.
“Come in,” she called. The door flung open and the triplets cascaded through.
“Can we sleep with you?” Haley asked, the same question she’d posed the past two nights.
Cora should say no, exert some discipline to counteract the bad habit that was forming. She should march them back to the nursery and insist they stay in their beds for the remainder of the night.
“Just for tonight,” she said, the same as she had the previous nights. Having them in her bed made her a little less lonely. She re-arranged pillows and lifted blankets so they could join her under the covers.
“It’s like that scene in The Sound of Music where all the kids go to Maria’s room,” Melody exclaimed.
“No, it’s not, silly,” Paige declared as she snuggled against Cora. “There’s no thunderstorm.”
“I don’t want a thunderstorm,” Haley added, curling into Cora’s other side. “They scare me.”
“Clear skies. Nothing to worry about.” Cora stroked Haley’s hair, soothing her.
“Can we have a story?” Haley asked.
“We had two before you went to bed.” Which was hours ago, Cora wanted to point out.
“How about a song instead? We could do the ‘raindrops on roses’ one.” Melody looked up to Cora with expectant eyes.
It would suit since they were re-enacting the scene where Julie Andrews sang about her favorite things.
“Please, Cora, sing it for us,” Paige said.
“You know I can’t sing.” Cora tapped Paige on the nose.
“Everyone can sing,” Haley said in a sleepy voice.
“You’re right,” Cora admitted, “but it doesn’t sound good when I do it.”
“I wish William was here.”
“Me, too.”
“He’d sing it for us.”
Each of the triplets piped up in turn, their words making Cora even sadder. Somehow, she had to get all of them through the night.
“I’m sure he would.” Cora said. He’d sung them countless songs in his rich baritone.
“When’s he coming back?” Paige asked yet again.
They’d all asked some version of that question multiple times in the past days. Cora had evaded answering, saying he was busy, because she wasn’t willing to admit the truth to her precious girls. She couldn’t bring herself to say that she’d sent him away and he was never coming back.
“I think I can remember a story that you all like about a princess and her pet dragon. Let me see.” Cora told a story taken from one of their books that she’d read countless times, embellishing and adding details to lengthen it.
One by one, they dropped off to sleep. Her bed was no longer empty, she reflected. It was crowded with little girls she loved. She listened to their soft breathing in the night and mused how they filled a space in her heart, a big one. Her love for them was deep and wide and for forever.
But it was no longer enough. She rubbed a hand over her heart where there was an empty place, one William had filled. Bad things might come out at night, but the truth did too. She loved him. She’d known that weeks ago and hid from it because it frightened her. Frightened her to think how attached she’d become to a man she expected to leave.
And what had she done? She’d been the one to make him leave, to not give him a chance to express how he felt. Maybe a relationship, a real one, had been possible, and she’d been the one to crush it.
Twenty-Seven
William rewound the footage he was watching, knowing he should delete it. He’d turned over the security files from the Lawrences’ house to Alert Security to be archived, but he’d kept a copy of this DVD for himself. He shouldn’t have. He knew that. It was unprofessional, and he was only torturing himself with it.
He’d gotten to a scene with an outside shot in which Cora tried to teach the girls how to use a hula hoop. He laughed when Melody spun so hard that she fell over. Cora looked sexy as the hoop circled her hips, bringing him a different set of emotions. Another clip showed the girls in the kitchen helping Cora make breakfast. They chatted and picked on each other, but the love between them was obvious. His favorite section of the video was of himself singing a lullaby in the nursery. Cora stood in the doorway of the room, a beautiful smile on her face as the kids fell asleep. He’d felt so much a part of their little family that night.
He continued watching the chronological progression of his time at the Lawrences, and it astounded him how much the girls had grown and changed in the weeks he’d been in the house. He guessed that was why parents were always talking about how fast childhood went. Months didn’t matter to adults, but three-year-olds’ looks changed, they learned new words and evolved in a thousand other ways in a short span of them.
And he couldn’t shake the idea that he was missing out on that. He was also missing out on the chance to help Cora, who was now the only one there for the girls. Would she be as tired as she was when he’d first arrived? He hoped not, but without any help, he didn’t see how she wouldn’t be.
He hated this. Hated being exiled from their lives, hated not being able to put his arms around Cora and love her at night, hated the alienation he felt.
He told himself the first time he watched the DVD that it was helping him cope with the sudden loss of Cora and the girls. The fifth time he viewed it, he could no longer lie to himself. He had to see them on film because it was his only way to be close to them.
He hit pause when his phone rang, hoping as he did every time that Cora was calling.
“Hey, William,” Ben’s voice came through the line. “I was planning to stop by Harbor House for a beer on my way home. You want to join me?”
“Thanks, but I don’t feel like going out,” William replied. Ben was trying to get him out of his funk, but William wasn’t ready yet.
“Come on, man. You’ve turned me down twice now. I’m starting to think you don’t like me.” Ben’s tone was playful, but William figured some concern for him was built into Ben’s joking.
“Sorry about that. Maybe next time.” That night, William wasn’t in the mood to hold down a barstool and make conversation, even though he appreciated Ben’s efforts.
“Sure. See you.” Albright ended the call and William hit play again.
He was sunk in memories of his time with Cora and the girls when a knock sounded on his door. Again, hope sprang up until he remembered Cora had no idea where he lived. It couldn’t be her, and she wouldn’t bring the girls out at night like that. Probably pizza delivery with a wrong address.
When he opened his door, he found Ben, grinning and holding up a six-pack of Heineken. “I decided to drop by instead.”
“Come on in,” William said. He could hardly turn down the company when it showed up at his apartment, bringing beer. Seating was a problem though since William had never really furnished his place beyond one recliner, a cooler as an end table, and a big-screen TV.
He headed for the little dinette set that had two chairs, noticing Ben’s eyes flick to the frozen image on the screen. Cora sat on the living room floor doing a puzzle with the girls in the frame. William hit the off button, turning the screen dark.
“I’ll take one of those beers. I think I’ve got a bag of chips somewhere.” William pulled chips from his cabinet and took a seat across from Ben. They each opened a beer and took a long pull.
“I hear you’re on the Mason Diamond Company assignment,” Ben said, tilting back in his chair. “I’m a little jealous.”
“Yeah, it’s a go
od one.” The new job was exactly the kind of thing William had wanted to do from the beginning with Alert. He’d be working with a security team for a large jewelry firm with stores throughout the U.S. and Europe. The budget they’d been given was almost limitless, which made sense considering the value of what they protected. They could have the latest in technology, the best the market had to offer. “Real James Bond sort of stuff.”
“I saw the quote Boswell did for the company. Transporting diamonds is big business.”
“I’m surprised you’re not on the team,” William said. Ben was one of the best tech people he’d seen, completely up to date on the newest equipment and with the mind to operate it.
“Boswell wanted me to be, but I asked to pass. Too much travel.”
The job involved trips to suppliers and warehouses including ones in European cities. William saw that as one of the bonuses. He’d get out of his lonely apartment, see parts of the world he had never had the chance to explore, and maybe bury his feelings for Cora under an avalanche of work.
“I thought you’d like that,” William commented.
“I’d miss my family.” Ben put his beer on the table. “Can’t imagine being away for weeks at a time anymore. I did that for too many years when I was deployed.”
William had never been a family man, so he’d never quite understood when guys he served with could barely contain their excitement when headed home from overseas. They’d be keyed up, anxious with every inevitable delay. He was starting to understand those emotions. If he’d had Cora and the girls to return to…
“Not a concern for me.” And never would be, with the way it was looking.
“Yeah?” Ben questioned with a gesture to the blank television screen. “Looks like you’re missing them.”
William shrugged. “They were never mine to miss.”
“Kids are awesome. I’d show you pictures of mine if I hadn’t done it at least twice before.” Ben chuckled. “Do you remember being a kid? The freedom of an entire day before you. Amazing. That ends somewhere around twelve or thirteen, but before that…awesome.”
The SEAL’s Unexpected Triplets Page 18