The Earl of Arundel

by Johnson, Angela

  Henry took a deep breath and reminisced about his first horse ride.

  “My grandfather gifted me a horse for my birthday, so my father decided he would be the one to teach me how to ride. I remember loving the horse. I named him Topaz. My favorite memory is when I rode him for the first time.” Henry spoke about the freedom while riding a horse. Phillip understood; he had a similar experience flow into his mind. Henry continued and spoke of watching nature fly by while the horse cantered and of the wind as it blew through his hair and clothing.

  Emma caught Phillip off guard as she asked, “Do you remember the first time you rode a horse?”

  In his mind Phillip saw the first horse his father had given him. “Yes, I was young. My father presented me with a horse.” He stopped speaking as another memory flashed. The horse was a gift for his father throwing him in a dark closet for two days without food or water.

  “Do you remember the horse’s name?” Emma prodded as he let his memory take him away.

  “Loxley.”

  “From the tale of Robin Hood?” she asked, surprised.

  “Yes. My governess would entertain Edward and me at bedtime by telling us stories. Robin Hood was one of our favorites,” he said as the memory continued to flow through his mind.

  “Edward?” Both Henry and Emma asked in unison.

  Again, without any thought he said, “My twin brother.”

  “You have a twin brother?” Henry asked, trying to prod more of a memory from him.

  “Yes, I believe I do. The memory came back as we were speaking,” he said with excitement.

  Both Phillip and Emma were startled when Henry stood. “Please excuse me. I forgot I have a previous engagement.” Looking back as he walked away, he said, “I will return to help you back into the house.”

  They watched as Henry left. He had purpose in his steps, which caused Phillip to believe he would be gone for a while.

  “I apologize for my brother, Phillip.”

  He smiled, realizing he enjoyed it when she said his name. “It feels wonderful to have a few memories coming back.”

  “I believe it won’t be long before you have your full memory, and then you will leave Springhill Abby,” she said. He thought the smile on her face looked forced.

  “Miss Emma—” he started as she cut him off.

  “Please, call me Emma. There’s no need to be so formal.”

  Nodding his head in acknowledgment, he continued, “Emma, I don’t know what I would have done these past weeks without your kindness in reading to me and keeping my mind off the injuries.”

  “It’s wonderful to have another person at Springhill Abby who enjoys literature as much as I do,” she said as she ran her hands down her dress to smooth the bodice. He could see she was nervous.

  A flutter went through him as he looked at her face.

  She smiled at him as though she could see through into his thoughts and the struggle he was fighting. He couldn’t start a relationship with her. It was unwise without his memory.

  “We should go back inside,” he said, pulling his crutches to each side so he could pull himself up.

  “Should I get Henry?” she asked.

  “No, I think I can make it.”

  Eleven

  Emma sat in the drawing room sketching. Since her morning with Phillip, she’d stayed away from him. She was falling in love and didn’t know what to do about it, mainly because he was still unsure of who he was. If he had a firm grasp on his memories, she wouldn’t worry so much about losing her heart to him. As it was, she feared thinking there could be a possible future with him.

  “I have something I need to say,” her father said as he entered the room.

  “When did you get back from London?” Henry asked, shaking their father’s hand.

  “I’ve only just arrived.” He turned to Phillip, ignoring further questions. “If you’d like, we can speak in private. I have information regarding your identity.”

  “You’ve all been so wonderful to me. This journey isn’t mine alone. Please, say what you’ve found.”

  Emma gave an inward cheer and thought about dancing the waltz as she wouldn’t have to wait to get the information later.

  “Lord Arundel,” her father said. He paused as though he expected a response. “Does the title sound familiar?”

  Emma kept her eyes on Phillip as her father’s words sunk in. She saw recognition on his face.

  “Yes.” Phillip laughed as he shook his head in reverie. “Yes . . . I’m Arundel.” He sounded surprised, as though his name should have been normal to him and he should have always known it. “I don’t know why it was so lost in my mind.”

  “What else did you find out?” Emma asked. She tried to keep the reluctance out of her voice. The more he found out about himself, the more she worried she would lose him.

  “You are the eldest son of the Duke of Ashby.”

  Emma let the words fade from her hearing as she feared Phillip’s entire life was coming back to him. She wished she could go back to the time they’d shared in the garden to enjoy it more fully instead of being so nervous. She was about to leave the room when she heard Phillip.

  “You would think my name would bring more memories back. I guess it will take more time.”

  “We know who you are, and as soon as Doctor Price allows you to travel, we can restore you to your family.” Her mother’s words brought comfort to Phillip but distress to Emma. She knew it was ridiculous to feel this way, but she didn’t want him to regain his memory. It was selfish, but it was because she was in love with him.

  Her heart further dropped when her father said, “If you write a letter, I’ll have a rider deliver it for you.”

  As Phillip continued to use crutches, he didn’t need as much assistance as he had in the beginning, and Emma found they could go farther than the rose garden. She took him for walks to the churchyard, cemetery, and a small stream. Each was close enough he could get to it and return after a bit of rest.

  “Lord Arundel,” she stated as she walked and he hobbled down a dirt road to the church yard. “You are doing much better with the crutches.”

  “I do feel like I have more freedom. Why are you calling me Lord Arundel?” he asked in annoyance as he pushed a rock out of the pathway with his good leg.

  “I want to help you get used to your title again.” She pointed to a boulder in the distance. “We will go as far as the large boulder today, and you can rest before we head back.”

  “I would prefer you call me Phillip,” he said with a nod, indicating he saw the destination.

  They approached the boulder, and she helped him position himself in a way he could rest his leg until they headed back.

  “This is the perfect resting spot,” he said with a warm smile.

  She played with her fingers as they sat. She didn’t know where to take the conversation.

  “I was wondering if you have any Greek mythology in the library at Springhill Abby,” he said.

  She let out a breath of air she had not realized she was holding. “Yes, we do.”

  “I might like to read a few more books while I’m here if you think your father wouldn’t mind.”

  “No, I don’t think he would mind.” She kicked herself for not saying something more intelligent. She could’ve remarked on her favorite Greek myth about Psyche and Cupid.

  As he looked at her, she could see the same tense feeling in his face that she had in the pit of her stomach. She leaned toward him, letting him know she was willing to explore an intimate moment with him, but he stood and grabbed his crutches.

  “We should go back,” he said, putting the crutches under his arms.

  She blushed as she watched him trying to avoid her. She put her hands over her cheeks to hide the evidence.

  “Emma, I . . . I don’t know who I am
. I know my name, but I don’t know much about myself. I don’t want to give you false hopes or make promises I can’t keep.” He pulled her face up so she could see him. “I’m very fond of you.” He looked into her eyes. They were a window into her soul betraying her every thought and feeling.

  “Phillip, even though you don’t know who you are, you can trust the way you feel about another person.”

  A thrill of excitement went through her as he leaned into her. Her hands were moist as she waited. Just before his lips touched hers, she closed her eyes. The kiss was perfect. She didn’t realize it until he kissed her, but it was a feeling she’d been waiting to have her entire life. Her heart told her this was right. He touched her face as he held her lips with his. Heat flooded into her cheeks as he explored her lips, touching both separately. He deepened the kiss, which caused her toes to curl. Her arms strengthened as she pulled him closer to her by taking hold of his lapels.

  She lost herself in the kiss until she remembered where they were standing. They were in public. They hadn’t taken time to notice if anyone else was around, and he was kissing her longer than was appropriate.

  Satisfied by his gentle touch, she almost let herself forget about propriety. Coming to her senses, she pulled away. “We should be more cautious.” She hated the words as they came out.

  He pulled away from her and nodded. She watched as he made his way back to the house. She stayed at the rock in the churchyard, fearing if she moved the magic of the moment would leave her.

  Twelve

  Phillip knocked on the door of Lord Anthony’s den. He couldn’t stop thinking about Emma and the kiss they’d shared. He was certain she was the first woman he’d ventured to kiss. Such a kiss would never leave a man’s memory.

  “Enter,” Lord Anthony called.

  “My Lord,” Phillip said.

  “This is a surprise. What can I do for you, Arundel?” Lord Anthony pointed to a chair. Phillip limped over to it. He was certain the limp he now had would be permanent. He still used the crutches so he wouldn’t put too much weight on his leg as it healed.

  “Thank you for seeing me, sir. I wanted to know if you’d heard from my family yet.”

  “I expect we will have an answer from them any day now. Doctor Price is still reluctant to let you travel, as he hasn’t found a source for your headaches.”

  “The headaches have become less intense as I’ve healed.” Phillip squirmed in his seat. He had a feeling he should wait until he knew more about himself, but he remembered Emma’s words telling him he could trust his instincts, and decided to move forward with his request. “I would like to ask for Miss Emma’s hand.”

  Lord Anthony’s right eye raised in surprise. “It is inadvisable to enter into an engagement when you know so little about yourself. Have more of your memories returned?”

  “Few memories have come back. But I cannot deny the love I have for Emma. When you told me my name, you told me I am not married.”

  “You are correct.”

  “Do you have an objection against my character?”

  “No, you are an honorable young man.” He stopped speaking, but Phillip thought there was something more he was going to say. Instead of speaking, Phillip waited, hoping Lord Anthony would continue. Instead of making the comment he suppressed, he stated, “I give you my blessing.”

  “Thank you, my lord.” Phillip pulled himself up, excitement adding a hop in his hobble.

  Deciding he should ask Emma to be his wife without further delay, Phillip grabbed his crutches and limped out of the house in search of her. It took a short walk along a path strewn with shrubs for him to find her sitting under a large oak tree. He hesitated before approaching, as he hadn’t planned a way to ask for her hand.

  “You are walking much better,” Emma said, pulling him out of his thoughts.

  “I have a slight limp, but over time I hope to be able to hide it,” he said as he slowly found his way to sitting on the grass next to her. He noticed her sketch book lying on the ground and decided to change the conversation.

  “Henry told me you enjoy drawing. Do you have any sketches I could view?”

  He didn’t know why she was blushing, but he loved the way she looked with her dark brown hair, green eyes, and pink cheeks. He stopped speaking as he lost himself in her face. Hoping her attention moved away from her sketch book, he reached for her drawings only to have her pull away.

  “Is there a reason you don’t want me to see your drawings? Henry told me you do landscapes.”

  She looked relieved when he mentioned the landscapes as though she expected him to say something different. “Yes, but they aren’t any good.”

  “You’re being modest,” he said, holding his hand out in expectation. “Let me see the sketches, and I can give my opinion on your talent.”

  “I don’t want your opinion,” Emma said, moving the sketchpad further out of reach.

  “Have I made you uncomfortable?”

  “No, you haven’t.” She looked down at her hands. “I’m not ready to show you my sketches.”

  He looked at her and scooted around so they were facing each other. He touched her face and then ran his hand through her loose curls. I’m making the right choice. His heart pounded so hard he could hear it pulsing in his ears. She filled his thoughts during the waking hours, and he dreamt of her when he was sleeping.

  He smiled at her and held her eyes with his before he leaned forward and kissed her. She fell into his arms, allowing him to kiss her lips, cheeks, and neck. He pulled back with a start. A gentleman would never compromise a woman such as Emma.

  “Why did you pull away?” she asked in a dreamy voice, her eyes closed as she waited for him to kiss her again.

  “We need to stop this insanity,” he whispered. The feelings he had for her scared him. Although he still didn’t have his memory back, he knew he’d never been in love before. This was a new experience for him, a frightening but wonderful experience.

  She looked offended, so he placed both hands on her face to explain. “I shouldn’t compromise you in this way.”

  “I’ve already told you I don’t feel compromised, my lord.”

  She moved closer to him and kissed his cheek. He wanted to stop the response his body gave at her touch, but he couldn’t pull away. Instead he gave in and kissed her.

  They pulled apart and were staring into each other’s eyes as he again asked, “May I see your sketches?”

  She gave him a playful smile. “No, you may not.”

  Taking her flirting as a challenge, he reached over and grabbed for her sketchbook.

  “I said no!” she chided as she moved the book further away from him by grabbing it and standing.

  “You have an unfair advantage,” he teased as he worked to pull himself off the ground. Keeping his injured leg from taking too much weight, he used the other with his hands to lift himself off the ground. He wasn’t sure how this would help him with asking her to be his wife, but he’d figure it out.

  “Unfair?” she said with a grin. “I think not. These are my sketches, after all.”

  With his crutches he moved forward, playing her game. Intrigued by her desire to keep the sketches secret, he wanted to see them now more than he did when he first sat down. He reached forward and just missed taking hold as she pulled away.

  “A gentleman would respect my desire to keep these hidden,” she said with a mischievous grin.

  “Are you saying I’m not a gentleman?” he asked, moving closer.

  “Oh, I believe you were raised to be one,” she chimed, moving away again.

  He laughed as he watched her back away. He knew the only way he was going to get the sketchpad was to surprise her. Instead of reaching for the pad, he put his arm around her waist and pulled her to him. He would’ve picked her up for the kiss since she was a half a head shorter than hi
m, but he wasn’t sure his one leg would hold both their weight.

  He placed his lips on hers and took his time. He started on her bottom lip, causing the sketchpad to drop from her hand. He thought about ending the kiss so he could claim his victory by seeing the sketches but decided he was enjoying it too much to stop. He moved to her top lip and with deliberate slowness continued the kiss.

  He heard her sigh. He smiled as he realized she was enjoying this as much as he was. He continued from her lips to her cheek. Lost in the moment, he moved down to her jaw line. A warning went off in his mind telling him he needed to stop, but holding her close to him was warm and comfortable and he didn’t want to let go. He moved his hands up to her hair, which smelled like peppermint oil, and removed the pins holding it up. As her hair fell over his hand, he moved back to her lips and kissed her with more urgency.

  “Are you aware you’re in public?” Richard’s rebuke pierced the air and put a stop to the moment.

  Phillip pulled away and turned to see Anne and Richard on the path beside them. Richard, ever the vicar, looked disapproving. Anne had a knowing smile on her face.

  He gently released Emma from his arm, and she moved away from him. He looked down at the sketches and saw they weren’t landscapes as he had been led to believe. He saw his face looking back up at him.

  Finding his voice, he looked at Emma to see she was blushing. She grabbed the pins from his hand and fumbled to put her hair back in place.

  “I apologize. I was caught in the moment and shouldn’t have let it go so long.” He hesitated as he spoke, wanting to be precise with his words.

  “No, you shouldn’t have,” Richard said, reproving both of them. “You shouldn’t be alone anymore.” Richard’s voice rose with anger as he spoke.

  Emma’s hands covered her face as she attempted to cover the heat. Phillip watched as she looked down at her sketches. Her eyes went wide in embarrassment. She didn’t speak as she bent down to pick them up.