by Sadie Sears
She glared at me.
“Hey, I don’t know how much attention you’ve attracted from Saul.” I really didn’t. Trusting her with Mae’s life was a big deal.
But my demon was yelping with glee at all the scent pheromones coming off this woman. Hell, if I hadn’t suspected it before, I knew for sure now.
She had potential be a dragon mate. Except Chloe had said some women never fulfilled that potential—they had the free will to ignore fate or some such shit. So, this definitely wasn’t my news to share—not with the way Jo obviously felt about dragons and our nearest and dearest.
“So, what’s the plan?” She was still hovering in the doorway. “If I can’t head right to Mr. Brek’s with an arrest warrant, what do you think we should do?”
“I’ll meet you at The Dragon’s Lair later. Saul usually has business hours today. I can deal with him there. I need him to believe Mae is dead before we do anything else, so I’m going to convince him of that first. I swear I’ll bring you in if I run up against anything I can’t handle alone.”
She nodded slowly. “Okay.” Then she raised her finger again. “But if you don’t show, I’m going to hunt you down.”
I walked into The Lair, my hand on the memory card in my pocket, and I looked straight toward Saul’s booth. He was there. Of course he was there.
Like some kind of king holding court.
Chloe was watching him too, her eyes narrowed. But I knew she preferred to have him where she could watch him and all of his crap. And Saul was always happy to oblige—perfectly at ease conducting his business in public.
I glanced around casually, like I didn’t care who else was here. Chloe was in her usual position behind the bar, drying glasses and looking oblivious to where she was, but she knew everything and everyone in here. Jo was also in position, hunched over in a booth and nursing something clear with ice in it.
That guy Keir was in his usual shadowed corner, looking like something had just dug him up, but he never looked any different, so I didn’t pay him any more attention than usual.
I walked over to Saul and threw the memory card onto the table in front of him. “Job’s done.”
Saul glanced up and a smirk twisted his mouth. “Looking good, Draven. I guess I should welcome you to the dark side.”
“I recorded the girl’s death so you could see it for yourself—thought you might enjoy that.”
“You know me well.” Saul laughed. “And I see the extra money won you over after all. A dead girl.”
I gritted my teeth both against the reaction of my demon to the lies I’d told Saul and to control my temper. “That was my last job.” I gestured at the card he still hadn’t bothered to pick up. “Don’t come near me again.”
I spun and walked away, my strides quick as Saul called my name behind me.
I didn’t even care if he paid me. The only thing I cared about these days was Mae’s safety.
I doubled over as pain sucker punched me in the gut, and then I redoubled my effort to get out of Chloe’s pub before Saul could talk to me again.
I threw myself onto my bike and headed home. I needed to go there and remove any trace of Mae. All memories of her had to be gone. Out of my place, out of my head. Forever.
She’d said she only wanted to go with her grandma to assess things, like she might somehow decide to come back, but we both knew the smart thing would be to stay away.
And Mae was smart. So smart. She’d stay away. She’d figure it out and not come back.
That was for the best. She’d be better off without me, and her time away would allow her to realize that.
I couldn’t allow myself to be sad about that. I was bad for her. My demon was especially bad for her. And he was too strong. I was becoming more and more like my father every day. And I couldn’t do to Mae what my father had done to Mom.
I raced through my front door and ripped the flowers out of the vase that Mae had picked from by the front path one day. Then I threw the whole console table the vase had been standing on against the wall, primal pleasure ripping away any common sense as the wood splintered and pieces of the small table littered my floor.
Then I walked into the kitchen and grabbed her favorite mug from the cupboard and dumped it into the trash. The coffee followed, grains spilling from the jar and scattering across the tile.
I stormed up the stairs and ripped the sheets she’d slept in from the bed, only pausing to press them against my nose as I inhaled her scent for the last time.
Then I shredded the sheets and ripped the footboard off the bed, leaving the whole thing collapsed on the floor.
I walked around the entire house, trying to remove as much of Mae as I could. I even threw the stone bench from my balcony and listened to it crack on the patio below. Once I’d wiped the memories of her from my house, the sky had darkened outside, and my demon was satiated by the chaos I’d created in my home. I locked my front door and sank to the floor, my back against it.
I needed to stay here. Locked in, away from everything, from everyone. I was growing dangerous, and my demon was growing stronger.
Being alone was best for me and best for everyone else.
17
Mae
Leaving Draven felt like leaving half of myself behind, like something was missing from me. And of course, something was missing. I’d left Draven behind. And Aro. My heart ached at the memory of Aro’s gentle gaze, at his quite protection and strength.
I swallowed and twisted my hands together in my lap as I watched Draven’s receding figure in the side mirror.
He didn’t turn around or walk away. He’d simply watched after the car until we rounded the curve in the road. When I could no longer see him, anxiety and panic unfurled within me, and I squeezed my eyes shut against the burn of tears.
Grandma had driven me home, chattering about nothing the entire way. And while I was glad to hear her voice after such a weird situation, I was more glad not to have to talk back. She’d filled every moment of silence between Draven’s house and hers.
That was two days ago, and I was still moping around the house like a teenager after my first break-up.
I nursed the coffee in front of me for so long that it went cold.
“You not doing any better?” Grandma came hurrying in the back door from some meeting or other with her friends.
Honestly, she never stopped. I’d never known Grandma had such a rich social life. Poker night wasn’t even the weirdest thing she did. Already, since we’d been home, she’d spent a couple of hours at her life drawing class, attended her cigar appreciation society, and spent the previous evening drinking with the guys from the local motorcycle club—and she didn’t even own a motorcycle. She was just their literal old lady.
Grandma didn’t need me anymore. And that hurt as much as it made me happy. She wasn’t alone without me because her life was so full, but my life wasn’t here with her anymore.
It was back in Port Lair.
With Draven.
I looked at Grandma until she began to blur in front of me.
“Aw, honey.” She walked to me and wrapped an arm over my shoulder. “We need to come up with a plan, don’t we?”
I chuckled, because Grandma wasn’t an aw, honey person at all, and two tears rolled slowly down my cheeks.
“I think I’m going crazy, Gram.” I leaned my head against her. “I didn’t know being apart from him would feel like this.”
She stroked my hair. “I think I know what to do, then.”
I breathed a sigh of relief that had been building for the past two days. Grandma was going to make it all okay again.
“We’re going to get in my car, and I’m going to drive you back to Port Lair. I’ll stay in a hotel, and you’ll talk to Draven. Simple solution, right?”
“But your social activities.” It was a weak protest, but I’d seen how happy they made her. “And it’s a three-hour drive…” My protests were getting weaker.
All I really wa
nted to do was run from the kitchen and buckle myself into the front seat of Grandma’s old clunker.
A little under three hours later—apparently Grandma had a lead foot when the occasion called for it—we sat in front of the turn-off to Draven’s house, her car idling.
“What’s the plan?” Grandma looked at me. “Door-to-door service?”
“Nah.” I shook my head. “Take me into town. I’ll grab a cab back.”
“You sure?” She narrowed her eyes. “You’re not chickening out on me now that we’ve come this far?”
I shook my head again, this time more emphatically. “No. I mean, no way. I just want to make sure you’re comfortable before I see Draven. Plus, I can use my time in the cab to think and get properly nervous and stuff.”
“Okay, honey.” She pushed the car into gear, and we continued down the highway into Port Lair, where Grandma checked into her hotel. I walked with her to her room, and as soon as we made it through the door, she clapped her hands together in glee.
“This is perfect. A whole night with unlimited TV, a mini-bar, room service, and no responsibilities or demands to go anywhere or do anything else.” Then she opened her purse and scrabbled around inside before drawing out her wallet and grabbing some bills. She shoved them at me. “Here. For your cab.”
I hesitated before I took the money, but really, I still couldn’t access my bank account. Dead women didn’t withdraw cash.
She shook the money. “Come on. When I talked about having no distractions, I even meant you, sweetheart. I need you to leave so I can get my relaxation on.”
I took the money and slipped it into my pocket.
“You can get a cab out front,” Grandma said. “Now go reclaim that man of yours.”
I took a deep breath and nodded. “I’ll do that.”
“You got your new phone with you?”
I patted my pocket.
“Good, now don’t call and interrupt my peace and quiet,” she instructed, and I giggled.
She grinned at me and twinkled her fingers in a little wave while she watched every movement I made as I left her room. She was probably just making sure I actually left and didn’t cramp her relaxation style.
The ride back to Draven’s didn’t take very long at all. Too short, really, because I still hadn’t figured out my strategy. I was caught between keeping things really casual and throwing myself into his arms so he got the message.
As we approached the gates to Saul’s compound of a home, I sank lower on the back seat. I hadn’t forgotten I was still that dead woman. Being spotted by the man hunting me wouldn’t make for a triumphant return from anywhere.
The cab pulled up in front of Draven’s house, and I looked at it and past it, toward the ocean. Maybe he wasn’t even here. He could have been out letting Aro fly or perch on one of the cliffs that Aro had told me about. Perhaps he was even out whale hunting, although the idea turned my stomach a little.
That, and how did Aro eat whale then shift back to Draven and still deal with the stomach contents? I shook my head. It was probably better not to drive myself crazy with the logistics of any of this. Most of my experiences with Draven’s world so far defied logic, anyway—even if there were rules in place I still hadn’t been told about yet.
I knocked on the door, timidly at first then with greater boldness, and the sound echoed through his house, reminding me to knock even louder again in case he was downstairs in his gym.
When Draven opened the door, it was a mere crack, and he peered out, only one eye visible.
“Mae.” There was a note of torture in his voice, and I immediately stood straighter.
“Are you okay? Are you sick?”
He could have shaken his head, or he could have nodded. He could have been bleeding out all over the floor behind him, but with the way he’d barely opened the door, I couldn’t see.
I glanced around. The road behind me was still empty, and I didn’t expect Saul to come strolling down on a casual walk, but I couldn’t guarantee it. “Can I come in?”
He hesitated, and his eye widened.
“Please?” I’d expected things to be awkward when I just reappeared unannounced, but not at this early stage when I wasn’t even inside yet.
He blew out a sigh before stepping back and slowly opening the door wide enough for me to slip through.
I caught my breath at the sight of his beautiful things lying shattered and broken in his entrance hall. Pieces of a small console table lay scattered like oversized splinters on top of the ornate tile floor.
“Draven.” I almost couldn’t say more than his name as it emerged on an exhale.
I gripped his hand, needing the strength or lending him some—I wasn’t sure. But he didn’t stop me from touching him, which was a relief. Instead, his fingers curled gently around mine, almost like an instinctive reaction more than choice.
“Has Saul been here?” Maybe he’d hurt Draven in some way.
But I glanced at Draven as he shook his head.
“No. This was all me.”
“I’ll help you clean it up,” I promised him. “But maybe first we need a coffee?” Anything to bring some normality back to the situation.
His shoulders moved, but it was like he couldn’t even be bothered to shrug properly, and I tugged him toward his kitchen, stopping abruptly as I stepped into that room.
“Draven,” I said again. “Are all of the rooms like this?”
His shrug was more effective this time, but his face remained expressionless like he couldn’t see any of the damage or feel any of what it meant, and my heart ached.
I needed to see for myself, and I walked to his living room. Forget coffee. I wanted to see exactly what had happened in the two days I’d been gone.
The story was the same. Soft furnishings had claw marks in them, and other possessions lay scattered and broken.
“What happened?” I faced him.
“You were everywhere.” He looked slowly around like he could still see whatever had prompted him to tear his house apart. “The memories, the scents. In my house, in my head.”
A sob lodged in my throat at the pain in his eyes, and I clutched his hand tighter. “No,” I whispered. “You don’t destroy your things like this. You don’t destroy what you’ve built in your life, and you don’t do it because of me. All these things you found and brought together…” The sob nearly escaped.
He looked at me, his movement almost slow motion.
“I’ll stay. I came back. I want to be with you, Draven. Don’t do…” I waved my arm. “Don’t do this.”
I didn’t know what else to do. I didn’t know where Draven had gone, and I didn’t know how to bring him back. It was like he’d retreated from me. Pain shimmered in his gaze, and I stepped forward to cup his cheek.
His eyes drifted shut, and he leaned into my touch.
I didn’t know how to make things better, but he needed to know I’d chosen him, that I was here. He didn’t need to worry anymore. I rose onto my tiptoes and kissed the edge of his jaw.
He whimpered, and I moved higher, kissing the corner of his mouth. An intake of breath parted his lips, and I kissed him fully, winding my arms around his neck as I pressed myself against him.
He groaned—a sound of surrender as well as lust, and he held me against him, eagerly exploring my mouth, the force of his desperation almost bruising. His tongue probed gently then deeper, and he sucked inhalations of my breath, stealing my air as I offered him every part of me.
His fingertips played at the hem of my T-shirt, and I shifted, impatient for his touch against my skin.
“Please,” I whispered.
Desire heated his gaze, and he drew my shirt over my head before discarding it on the floor. I unbuttoned his long-sleeved shirt before unsnapping my bra at the back and pressing my breasts to his chest.
He groaned again. “Careful,” he murmured. “Don’t touch them.”
I glanced at the thickened, ugly skin that covered from
his collarbone to the middle of his neck and down across one pec, and I hovered my forefinger above them. “Will it hurt me?”
He closed his eyes and flattened his mouth. “I don’t know,” he confessed. “But look how disgusting it is.”
I almost laughed. If Draven thought anything could make him ugly, he was a crazy man. “Never.” I kissed the smooth skin on the other side of his chest and smoothed the flat of my tongue over his nipple.
He released his breath in a whoosh. “I don’t want you to see me as a monster.” He cupped both of my cheeks and searched my gaze with his.
“I don’t.” They were only words, but I needed him to see the truth in my heart. “You could never be a monster. And neither could Aro. He’s such a wise, kind soul.”
He drew his brows together, a small crease between them. “You keep saying Aro,” he said. “But who is Aro?”
I stroked his cheek lightly with the backs of my fingers as I met his gaze. “It’s you, you silly man. Your dragon is named Aro, and he’s lovely.”
Draven’s eyes widened. “He talks to you?”
I nodded.
“But…but…but he barely talks to me. I didn’t even know he had a name.”
“You just forgot it.” I chuckled. “And I think the talking will come back, you know? If you want it to. I think he misses you.” I caressed his cheek again.
He made a sudden strangled noise, and his mouth crushed against mine again, and he sucked on my tongue as he moved against me, nudging his hard-on against my hips. I reached down and smoothed my hand over it before I dropped away from his hold, falling quickly to my knees.
“Mae?” My name came out of his mouth as a question, and I grinned up at him.
“Yes?” I flicked his button open before drawing his zipper slowly down, the clicking of the teeth separating loud in a room where the only other thing I could hear was Draven’s breathing as he kept his eyes focused on me.