by Layla Hagen
I grinned against her lips. “You think this is dangerous? Friendly warning: you haven’t seen anything yet.”
Chapter Twenty
Laney
Over the next two weeks, I realized that actually having a personal life when you were a surgical resident was insanely difficult. My respect for my colleagues with families increased tenfold. I was currently intensely following three goals. One: being up to no good with Cole. Two: attempting to lift Isabelle’s mood. Three: checking in with Skye periodically because she was getting more anxious as her due date approached.
“This is a good space,” I remarked.
“I agree, it has the right energy,” Isabelle said. We were checking out places for her practice. This was a six hundred forty-five square feet room in a high rise in Brooklyn. It didn’t have much of a view, but the windows were large enough for plenty of natural light to filter in.
“You only need a desk, a few chairs, and an armchair, right?”
Isabelle nodded, walking around with a strange expression.
“Isabelle, what’s wrong? If you don’t like it, we can just go.”
“The only thing I don’t like is the rent, but that’s true for everything I’ve seen.”
“I’m happy to lend you a few months’ rent.”
Isabelle snapped her head in my direction, glaring. “Thanks, but no. Josie offered too. Ian and Dylan as well, but it’s not how I want to start things off. I’m a grown-ass woman.”
“New York is expensive.”
“I chose to move here, though.”
I pressed my lips together to keep from insisting. I didn’t like seeing Isabelle like this. Her red hair was wrapped in an uncharacteristic bun on top of her head. Her hair even seemed less red than usual. I had to make one last attempt.
“Girl, I know you would do the same for me. So don’t let anything keep you from fulfilling your dreams, okay?”
“I’m not. I’m just a bit superstitious; you know me. Mom always says that the way you start a journey determines its success.”
“I love your mom, but that’s a crap saying. When I moved to New York, I was desperately sad and look at me now.”
Isabelle smiled brightly. “Yeah, let’s talk about that. Much more exciting than all the properties I can’t afford. I’m going to put this one on my shortlist though. It’s a fair price. I’m just gonna ask the touring company to give me more work until I get a decent number of clients.”
I was forever in awe of her ability to adapt and fight for what she wanted. She’d found this job in one week and had already completed a few tours. Isabelle gestured to the door, and we left the rental. The real estate agent who’d shown us this place was waiting in the corridor. He was speaking on the phone, and just shrugged when Isabelle put her hand to her ear, mouthing “I’ll call you.”
This guy had shown us no interest from the second Isabelle had told him that she was hoping to negotiate the rent down. The mama bear inside me wanted to give the guy a piece of my mind. Isabelle must have read that on my expression, because she tugged at my arm, pulling me toward the elevator.
“Want to take an Uber right away, or you want to walk around for a bit?”
“I have time. Let’s do some recon.” I’d never been to this part of the city before, but I could already see myself meeting Isabelle at some of the trendy bars around here after she finished her consultations.
“Sooo... back to you suddenly being the old Laney again...”
“What do you mean?” I narrowed my eyes until I put my sunglasses on. It was hot and sunny today, and I definitely didn’t dress for it.
“You know what I mean. You’re finally... living a little. You just existed for the past two years. It’s not a criticism. You needed that time to mourn, of course. Everyone heals at their own pace, but I wasn’t seeing any changes... until recently. Does that have to do with a certain Winchester brother?”
“It has everything to do with him,” I confirmed. I felt like I was moving on and that hole in my chest wasn’t so huge anymore.
“Yes, I knew it. You got him good.”
I smiled from ear to ear. “He got me, more likely.”
“Well, I did some digging, and he’s pretty smitten.”
“How exactly did you do that?”
“Asked Josie to pay attention if Hunter said something about Cole... and apparently he talks about you quite often and also has shown zero interest in any after-hour drinks on Friday with colleagues, which Hunter says is code for hooking up.”
I laughed. “Isabelle...”
“What? What’s the point of having a sister if I can’t ask her to spy for us?”
“Only you can say that with a straight face.”
“I take spying seriously. Oh, look. Ice cream. Want some?”
“Definitely.”
We’d come in front of a hip shop that had a sitting area inside, but also a takeout counter. We decided to eat on the go and keep exploring the area. They boasted unique flavors. Since I couldn’t even pronounce some, I stuck to hazelnut and mint.
After paying, we went down a side street full of graffiti art that I thought was quite excellent. One of them depicted a huge owl with both wings wide open. It was a brilliant snow white.
“Do you like sharing your life with someone again?”
I froze.
“Sorry, therapist habit of digging and pushing limits. Forget I asked.”
“Already forgotten.”
“You don’t even have to tell me anything. But it’s important for you to think about it.”
“Pretty please go back to being my friend and not a therapist.”
“You’re right, I’m sorry.”
Of course I liked it. I loved it. Cole was fun and sexy as hell, and he found inventive ways of waking me up. His favorite methods included full-body massages, full-body kisses, or just tickling me first thing in the morning. I loved all those things (perhaps slightly more the full-body massage).
But it had taken me so long to accept that I was on my own, that I was honestly terrified of how much I loved having Cole in my life.
My phone buzzed in my bag just as we decided to venture down a street full of artsy shops.
“Skye’s calling,” I murmured before putting the phone to my ear.
“Laney, it’s Rob. Skye’s water broke. We’re heading to the hospital. Are you on shift?”
“No. No, but I’m getting in a cab, and I’ll be there a few minutes earlier than you. I’ll tell Dr. Johnson. Please don’t panic. I know he’s a month early, but we’ll take good care of you.” She was supposed to give birth at the end of May, and now it was the third week of April.
“The baby is coming?” Isabelle asked.
“Oh, yeah. I’m going to the hospital.”
“I’ll tell the gang. Not sure if Rob’s in the right state of mind to do it.”
I chuckled. “Probably not. I’ve seen so many births. Some dads are more stressed than moms.”
“I’m betting Rob will be like that.”
Grinning, I flagged a cab, bidding Isabelle goodbye.
The second I entered the hospital, I slipped into doctor mode. I’d asked Dr. Johnson right after the visit to Skye’s house if I could attend the birth even though my ob-gyn rotation was over, and she said it was no problem. I changed into my scrubs at lightning speed, meeting Dr. Johnson in the surgical unit.
“Her baby still didn’t turn,” Dr. Johnson said. “So it’ll be a C-section.”
“Okay.”
“You can perform it under my supervision, if you want to.”
“Oh, that would be great.” My heartbeat accelerated. God, I was so excited to meet baby Dumont.
“But I’m warning you, it’s not easy to operate on someone you know, so if you feel like it’s too much, just say so, and I’ll take over.”
“I can do it,” I said confidently.
Half an hour later, I realized I couldn’t, though. No matter how much I wanted to be Dr. La
ney right now, I was mostly just Laney. My pulse was haywire, and my hands were shaking. No way could I perform surgery. But I could make sure Skye was relaxed and comfortable and not one bit afraid. Correction: Skye and Rob. The three of us were in the operating room, along with the usual team. Since Skye had received a spinal anesthetic, she was fully aware of everything that was going on.
“It’ll be okay. Dr. Johnson is the best, and I’ll be here the entire time. Unless you want me to leave?”
“No, please stay,” Skye said.
“Stay,” Rob said too. He was pale, and sweat dotted his forehead, but he was doing so well. I gave him thumbs-up when Skye wasn’t looking, and he gave me a small smile in return. Operating units made even the bravest of us uncomfortable; they were cold and austere, smelling of antiseptic and other medicines.
Rob was holding one of Skye’s hands. I took the other one between my palms, rubbing it a bit so she wouldn’t be cold.
“Wait, your hair got out of the plastic a bit.” I tucked it back in under the elastic band, smiling at her. I was talking her through the procedure, explaining every step. Usually the person who performed each task explained it, but Skye seemed very relaxed while I was talking, so I kept doing it. Twenty minutes later, baby Dumont was here.
“Oh my God, he’s so tiny,” Skye whispered.
Rob clasped his wife’s hand tighter. Things were a bit of a blur while the doctor closed up the incision and the nurse evaluated the baby. Then everyone was transferred to the postpartum room.
The baby was so adorable! Tiny and red and crying his lungs out, right until he felt his mom’s skin, and then he quieted a bit. Rob was looking at his son and wife with misty eyes. Truthfully, I was tearing up too. Thank God Dr. Johnson was in charge.
“He’s beautiful,” I whispered to Skye.
“I know, right? Takes after my husband.” She chuckled, looking up at Rob. “Aww, baby. Want to hold him too? He can do that, right?”
“Of course,” I said. “Just adjust your clothes so he has skin-on-skin contact.”
The three of them looked so perfect that I couldn’t help but ask, “Want me to take pictures?”
“Yes. Please,” Rob said, taking his phone out of his back pocket and handing it to me. My hands were still a little shaky with emotion, so the first two pics were very blurred. I got it right on the third try. I swear to God, my heart just sighed when I looked at the pic and then back up at the real life models.
“Hmm... what do you think? Should we keep Jonas? Or is Richie better?” Rob asked.
“What’s that?” I inquired.
“Well, we had multiple names on our list,” Skye said. “We were mostly certain we’d go with Jonas but thought we’d wait until he was here to check if it... fit.”
I laughed, feeling my heart sigh again. They didn’t need me to explain what was happening anymore, so there was nothing for me to do but join in the baby appreciation.
“What do you think? Jonas or Richie?”
I looked at the tiny bundle, focusing on his face. “I’m thinking Jonas.”
Something squeezed inside my chest. My eyes stung as I imagined how it must feel to hold a baby—your baby. I hadn’t allowed myself those kind of thoughts in two years. Each time I’d attended a birth, I’d fought them with all I had. Now I didn’t want to fight them. On the contrary, I wanted to let that sense of wonder and joy wash over me.
“Well, hello, little guy. You might be named Richie. It’s still up for debate,” Skye whispered. She caressed the back of his head with her fingers. Rob was still the one holding him, and by the look on his face, he didn’t plan to let him go anytime soon.
“Okay, thanks, Laney. For coming here, for keeping Skye so calm. You have no idea how stressed out she was on the way.”
“I’m happy I could help.”
He’d said I calmed down Skye, but I had a feeling he was more relaxed too when I was around.
I was on Winchester duty today. God, I liked the sound of that so, so much.
For some reason, I’d expected half the clan to come visit, but only Tess and Amelia arrived half an hour later.
“Where’s everyone else?” I asked.
“Skye said she preferred if we didn’t all come at once,” Amelia said.
“I’m afraid the baby will be overwhelmed,” Skye said.
Okay, that made sense, but I’d been so sure Cole would be here that I couldn’t help but feel deflated. Wanting to make myself useful, and suddenly feeling like I was intruding on a family moment, I headed to a vending machine to bring drinks for everyone. I couldn’t help myself and texted Cole on the way.
Laney: Both your sister and your nephew are perfectly healthy. And SUPER ADORABLE.
I might have overdone it with the caps, but I was so excited that I just couldn’t hold back. This immense joy just needed an outlet—for now, that was capitals.
Cole: Hey! Heard you’re there with them from Isabelle.
Laney: I thought you’d be here too. And now I’m sad :-(
Cole: Sis left clear instructions so not all of us would camp in her room at the same time. I’d do the same. But I can pick you up.
Laney: Yes, please.
Laney: Actually, wait. I’m going to ask Skye and Rob if they want me to stay overnight.
Cole: Let me know. I can sneak in and bring you food, find a supply closet for a... massage.
Laney: Since I’m not officially on shift, HELL YES to that too.
Cole: Why are you so corruptible?
Laney: I don’t know. Something about babies, I think. I have so much energy that I just can’t be still.
Cole: All noted.
Laney: I’ll keep you posted.
When I returned with drinks, everyone was oohing and awwing around the baby. I really wanted to do that too—even hold him, but that would definitely be intrusive.
“Rob, do you want me to stay the night?” I asked.
“No, that’s fine. I made arrangements to stay here with Skye.”
“Okay. Perfect. I’ll just stay here for a while longer, make sure everything is fine.”
I was also hoping to get some cuddling time with their son. Tess was holding him now, and the look in her eyes was just pure love.
Chapter Twenty-One
Laney
Three hours later, it was time for me to go. Skye was feeling well, and the young family definitely needed their privacy. True to his word, Cole picked me up. The second I left the hospital, I sort of crashed. I’d been high on adrenaline during the birth and while tending to Skye in the room, and now I was processing everything. I was still lost in thought when the cab pulled in front of his loft. Once we were inside the apartment, he trained his eyes on me.
“What are you thinking about, Laney?” he asked, caressing his thumb over my lower lip.
“So many things. Too many. I am not sure how to make sense of them.”
“Tell me, maybe I can help.”
“I don’t know,” I teased. “They’re about you. You might give me biased answers.”
“Of course they’ll be biased. But also one hundred percent true.”
I smiled as he led me backward through the loft until I felt the edge of the kitchen island at my back. Cole lifted me up on it right away. His gaze was beckoning me to talk.
“Everything is so intense when we’re together. So all-consuming... and different. I’m becoming different.”
“And that’s worrying you?”
“No, it’s just that I used to be terrified of certain things... like allowing myself to be happy when babies were born, to just give in to that joy. And today, it was so different. I was so immensely happy. I’m rambling. I’m sorry.”
“You have nothing to apologize for, Laney. Nothing. It’s normal to be scared. You can talk to me about anything. Don’t hide any side of you from me. I want to know all of you intimately.”
My heart thundered in my chest at his words. I had so many butterflies in my stomach that I coul
d barely sit still.
“Cole..., you mean that?” I laughed, and he laughed right back, feathering his lips over mine.
“You just make me feel things I didn’t know existed, Laney. And I have no problem owning up to that. You’re changing me, baby.”
“You’re changing me too,” I confessed. “I went from being terrified to just being afraid.”
He drew the tip of his nose down my temple to my cheek.
“Good. I want you to give yourself to me completely, Laney. And I won’t tire until that happens.”
“It might be a while. That feeling of having half your life ripped away from you is terrifying,” I whispered, because I wanted that too, so badly, but I didn’t want to make any promises. What if this fear of loving and losing never went away completely? It wouldn’t be fair to him to get his hopes up.
“I’ll be here. Do you trust me?”
“Yes. I just don’t trust myself yet.”
“I’ll change that, you’ll see.”
“God, you’re making it impossible for me not to dream.”
He grinned devilishly. “About what?”
“A huge family and a cute house where we’d all gather whenever we want to. Kind of like Skye’s. It seems like something that’s so far away, but you make me want to reach for it.”
“We have all the time in the world.”
“How are you so relaxed about this?”
“Babe, I told you that my nickname isn’t the charmer for nothing. One year ago? Or any time before I met you? I never even thought about the future. I think there’s a time for everything.”
He kissed my right cheek, descending to one corner of my mouth. He licked along my lower lip until I moaned, tugging at his shirt. I felt that lick right between my thighs.
“Did you have dinner?”
“Not really.”
“Put your hands on my shoulders,” he commanded. I didn’t even hesitate to do that, loving the way his strong body felt under my touch. I yelped when he lifted me off the island. He lowered me to the floor and walked me backward toward the couch.
“Hey, aren’t you going to feed me?” I asked.
“I’ve got some leftovers in the fridge. We can have some fun before dinner.” His hands went from my waist to my ass.