Despite popular belief, the Swedish match maker, Ivar Kreuger, didn’t have anything to do with the origin of this superstition—but he certainly benefited and milked it for all it was worth. Think of it—the more matches you used, the more he would sell! Three cigarettes to one match simply wasn’t good for business. Preying on people’s superstitious natures is too easy.
I must admit—this superstition “struck me” as completely counterintuitive. Isn’t the number three supposed to be good luck? It is considered a perfect number. “Three times a charm” and all? There is also three wishes granted, the Holy Trinity, the three jewels of Buddhism, the Triple Goddess, etc. The number three is symbolic throughout many cultures.
There is a common saying connected to this superstition, however: “bad luck comes in threes,” “death comes in threes,” or “never two without three.” It’s also connected to the idiom “When it rains, it pours.” Countless personal accounts report how one grandparent died, quickly followed by an uncle or cousin, and everyone began eyeing other family members to see who might be next. It’s been said by psychologists that our minds are simply obsessed with series, and finding an end to ill fortune.
Unlucky Number Roulette
☞It’s unlucky to have an odd number of people sitting at a table.
☞If someone has luck three times in one day, it is considered an auspicious day, and any business venture is sure to be successful.
☞A Scot won’t begin anything on May 3, which is called the “Dismal Day.”
☞Numbers ending in three, nine, twelve, or seven are the most likely to strike luck.
☞To find nine peas in a pod is good luck.
☞The American two-dollar bill is considered unlucky, but if one tears a small piece off the corner, its safe. Why? Because a torn corner makes a triangle which has three points—a “lucky” number. This is why you’ll see two-dollar bills with corners missing all over the country.
Acorn Lore
Acorns are magical. The squirrel in the movie Ice Age will tell you so. This little nut has been used as a charm for so many centuries, that you probably don’t know why your grandmother crochets or wood-carves little figures of acorns to place around the house.
From Great Britain to Scandinavia, acorns are thought to bring youth and luck. If a woman carries one in her pocket, it is believed she will stay younger and healthier for longer.
There is a story from Norse mythology that states that Thor hid under an oak tree while seeking shelter from thunder. This is the reason the oak is considered his tree. Which brings us back to questions about grandma’s little charms. Well, people would place acorns on a windowsill or front doorframe, as tribute to Thor and to ask for protection against thunder and lightning. In addition to grandma’s charms, you’ve probably noticed that on Venetian window blinds, there are little acorn-shaped spheres at the ends of the cords that adjust the blinds. This superstition is responsible for those! One last bit—the acorn is thought to resemble the male organ (shocker), ensuring the family line would continue with this little charm hanging around.
The Portrait-Teller
I recently attended the opening night of a local artist’s exhibition at a gallery, and, while browsing the exotic paintings, stopped short when a large piece fell. Shortly after the hubbub of the artist and his entourage ended, and the painting was saved, I wondered about the instinctual fear I had when it fell from the wall. Why I was struck with a feeling doom? Was it the mysterious complimentary drink? The heat of the lights?
As history will tell us, I’m not the only one who has had this feeling. Luckily, this painting was not a portrait of anyone. The superstition goes…if a portrait falls from a wall, it marks their impending death. Some people believe this only happens if the glass breaks.
There is a popular tale of an archbishop in England who walked into his study one day, and found his portrait lying on the floor. Seeing this may have terrified him, causing him to fall ill and quickly die. The same thing happened to The Duke of Buckingham during King Charles I’s reign. He walked into his study, saw his portrait lying flat on the floor, and died shortly afterwards. (By the way, who keeps a portrait of themselves in their own study?) Awkward.
The origin of this superstition is similar to that of shoes. Portraits were believed to carry the essence of their subjects, and, for this reason, their fates were intertwined. Nowadays, this is still present in some cultures. Though it often applies to any painting. So, even if it is a painting of a fruit or a landscape, the omen could apply to whoever is in the house or in closest proximity to the fallen painting.
Now that I know this, I’m starting to worry. The painting at that gallery wasn’t a portrait, but, it fell exactly when I passed it. Strange. I wonder…is that an omen for me? Now I’m nervous. Oh no. I think I feel a tickle in my throat…
Popular Superstitions Today
Blessing the Sneeze
Like so many superstitions, why we say “bless you” after someone sneezes isn’t clear. A popular theory is that your soul leaves your body when you sneeze, and blessing someone provides them protection from evil spirits taking the place of their loosey goosey soul. Versions of this blessing are said in over seventy languages—definitely a “contagious” superstition!
Knock on Wood
In an early nineteenth-century game of tag, if a child touched the wood of a tree, they would be “safe” from being caught. This is most likely originates from the “touch wood” superstition, where we knock or touch wood when we say something we don’t want to happen (to avoid tempting fate).
Spilling the Salt
Originally, if salt was spilled in your direction, you would get bad luck (not whoever spilled it). It is only in more modern times that the person who spilled the salt would get bad luck. One of the most likely connection (there are many) is that Judas overturned the salt at the last supper, and throwing it over your shoulder would prevent the devil from whispering in your left ear (the weakest ear). Or, one could draw a cross in the salt. Salt has been considered a valuable commodity throughout history, almost like money, and is often connected to prosperity. After all, it is where we get the word “salary” from (salarium in Latin). “Wasting” it could be seen as inviting tragedy upon yourself and your family.
Walking Under a Ladder
This is a murky one. Opinions on how this superstition originated differ depending on who you ask. Some consider walking underneath a ladder to be sacrilegious, since a ladder leaning against a wall makes a triangle (i.e. with three points like Holy Trinity). Others say that it comes from having condemned individuals walk up a ladder to reach the gallows. And some even take a practical standpoint: that something could fall on you! Knowing the inconvenience of paint and plaster on one’s head—this gets my vote.
We Prescribed That?
Medical Cures, Quacks, and Craziness
“A doctor is nothing more than consolation
for the spirit.”
—Gaius Petronius Arbiter
Tell Me about Your Medical History
Where do we go when we’re in pain…feeling helpless, and desperately seeking relief? A shrink might fit the bill. Or a physician, if it’s physical. But, if you could get both, even better. In days of yore, before doctoring became the respectable profession it is now, doctors were a bit of both. And the quacks out there knew this.
When our ancestors were hit with diseases, painful accidents, or if there was simply something they wished for—like pregnancy or eternal youth—doctors gave promises…they gave hope. That is why this chapter’s epigraph from Gaius Petronius Arbiter rings so true. “A doctor is nothing more than consolation for the spirit.”
Did a physician treating a poor soul suffering from a debilitating illness really believe sticking a tube up his butt, and blowing tobacco smoke into it, would do the trick? Of course they did. They also believed drilling a
hole into your skull might cure your depression.
While there are, of course, many cures that ancient doctors got right, why not instead focus on the ones they got shamefully wrong? Or simply examine the crazy stories, head-scratching remedies, and interesting discoveries? Our medical history is as interesting and inventive as we are, and will make you think of how much (and how little!) things have really changed. Even today, there are doctors, pharmaceutical companies, and quacky-ish sources pushing pills and remedies upon us like it was 1399. Promises.
Whether it comes in the form of tobacco enemas or other questionable practices, there will always be someone trying to blow smoke up your butt, to promise you something, to give you hope. It’s up to you to decide if you’re letting that tube down there.
Freshly Dead and Ready for Business
There are many befuddling medical cures from our past, but usually there is some sort of logic or dubious theory to be found that kind of makes sense if you squint and look sideways. However, logic escapes me where corpse medicine is concerned, and I’m baffled at how it went on for so long. Physicians have used corpses for a variety of “medical cures,” and even cosmetic purposes since ancient Greek and Roman times.
From healing warts to staying young, all parts of our human bodies have been believed to contain a certain purpose. You will find records upon records of prescriptions from the past that include human ingredients—from hair, body fat, and urine, to breast milk, stool, and menstrual blood. Some of the ingredients, however, like fat and bone, can only be retrieved when the human donor is not alive to object. You could make a pretty penny off the dearly-departed.
The hottest commodities for healing were just-dead criminals. The theory for this most likely comes from Flemish scientist and physician Jan Baptiste van Helmont, who believed the life force of the body lingered after death. If the deceased had a particularly violent death, it would be even stronger. Let’s explore some ways freshly dead bodies (and anciently dead mummy bodies) were used to “cure.”
Hangman’s Salve
What is hangman’s salve, and why does it sound like something you don’t want to try? Well, I won’t leave you hanging too long. Hangman’s salve is just another name for the fat of freshly executed criminals. Also known as “man’s grease” and “poor sinner’s fat.” It was used for a host of cures for ailments ranging from gout to curing open wounds.
The fat would be sold to apothecaries, but was also claimed by executioners. It was not uncommon in the Netherlands for an executioner to use the human fat as a salve for the wounds of other prisoners that had just been tortured. It was quite the hot commodity in the past, and continued to be used until the early nineteenth century. How is this possible? Well, as time went on, the ingredient was advertised less. You could have been buying it in a cosmetic product, and simply not have known.
So, how exactly do you…you know…get the fat off our bodies? Sixteenth-century physician, Andreas Vesalius, recommended extracting bones and cartilage from a cadaver by boiling the body, and saving the human fat that drifted to the water’s surface for its healing properties.
There are some theories on how this medical remedy came about, the most likely origins have to do with superstition. There is an ancient belief that the fat of saints and martyrs contained miraculous healing powers. Also, witches were known to consume narcotic herbs mixed with the fat of children on Witches’ Sabbath, because they believed it contained the vitality of the young person who had passed. It wouldn’t take long for beliefs of this nature to evolve into van Helmont’s theory. Folklore is the cause of many practices from both past and present.
Despite the cringe-worthiness of the belief itself, the use of human fat as a healing agent is not based entirely on superstition. Modern medicine has revealed that adipose tissue (i.e. fat) is highly “angiogenic,” meaning, it promotes the growth of new blood vessels from preexisting ones. So, those seeing results led others to believe it was effective without asking too many questions.
According to the American Journal of Pharmacy and the Sciences, a popular author in the seventeenth century told the story of a soldier who had been stabbed by a spear, but managed to recover completely by taking “a mixture of human fat, the blood of a he-goat, and Benedict water in beer.” And for any cramps that occurred, an ointment “consisting of human fat, dog’s fat, and the marrow of a horse-bone.” All I have to say is…why does the goat have to be a he?
But for real. How human fat cures went on for millennia has me as stumped as the freshly beheaded.
“If doctors were aware of the power of this substance, no body would be left on the [gallows] for more than three days.”
—Paracelsus, Swiss physician and alchemist
The King’s Drops
This curious seventeenth-century remedy gets its name from its most notable user: Charles II of England. Also known as Goddard’s Drops, The King’s Drops was a mixture of powdered human skull distilled in alcohol. Charles purchased the recipe from the physician, Johnathan Goddard, for about six thousand pounds, and often made it himself in his personal laboratory. The tincture was used to cure plights such as epilepsy, fainting, convulsions, lethargy, mental diseases, and to restore life to those on the brink of death.
To make this macabre eau de skull cocktail, all you need is:
»The spirit of hartshorn (a.k.a. ammonia)
»Powdered skull of a person recently hung
»A touch of dried viper
Thomas Willis, a seventeenth-century neurologist, brewed a variation of this spirit that contained chocolate. You know the saying, “a spoonful of sugar.” This recipe was not the first to include skull. Charles II’s grandfather, James I, was once prescribed it, but was known not to like it; a physician noted, “the king hates eating human bodies, [so] an ox’s head can be substituted in his case.”
The King’s Drops became fashionable after Charles began using them. But after Charles II employed the drops on his death bed and, well, died anyway, their reputation took a bit of a hit. Their use faded during the Victorian era. Their popularity may be connected with the theory of “like curing like.” Conditions like epilepsy were (correctly) believed to be due to a head issue, so it was only logical that brains and skulls would be the cure.
You might also find someone drinking water or wine from a skull, or stuffing some skull moss (the fungus that grew on really old skulls) up their nose to cure nosebleeds. John French, a “Doctor of Physick” made another recommendation in his book The Art of Distillation.
“Take the brains of a young man that has died a violent death, together with the membranes, arteries, veins, nerves, all the [pulp] of the back, and bruise these in a stone mortar until they become a kind of pap. Then put as much of the spirit of wine as will cover… Then digest it half a year in horse dung… A scruple or two of this essence taken in some specifical water once in a day is a most infallible medicine against the falling sickness.”
—”The Essence of Man’s Brains” recipe
If you want confirmation that these were instructions to drink brains and flesh that had been marinated in horse shit for six months: yes. But don’t worry. You were supposed to dilute it with some water, of course.
“I find the medicine worse than the malady.”
—John Fletcher, Jacobean playwright
Vampire Medicine
Human blood was another popular curative often prescribed in the past. Physicians would advocate it for numerous ailments, from epilepsy to restoring vitality. Fifteenth-century Italian scholar, Marsilio Ficino, believed blood would not only cure, but was the elixir of life itself. Ficino held that the elderly could restore a bit of their youth by sucking the blood of a healthy, young person. Like an actual vampire.
“Suck, therefore, like leeches, an ounce or two from a scarcely opened vein of the left arm…”
If you had “difficulty digesting raw blo
od,” he recommended, “let it first be cooked together with sugar; or let it be mixed with sugar and moderately distilled over hot water and then drunk.” Add some hot sauce and celery, and you have a right Bloody Mary on your hands.
One other particularly disgusting method of consuming blood was preserved blood jam. A recipe from a Franciscan apothecary in 1679 recommends you take the blood from a person of “warm, moist temperament, such as those of a blotchy, red complexion and rather plump of build.” So, if you see a Weasley walking around… Then you were supposed to “let it dry into a sticky mass.” I’ll let your imagination take over there. Next:
“Place it upon a flat, smooth table of soft wood, and cut it into thin little slices, allowing its watery part to drip away. When it is no longer dripping, place it on a stove on the same table, and stir it to a batter with a knife… When it is absolutely dry, place it immediately in a very warm bronze mortar, and pound it, forcing it through a sieve of finest silk. When it has all been sieved, seal it in a glass jar. Renew it in the spring of every year.”
These prescriptions are all from living persons, though, what about the corpse medicine we’ve been talking about? The belief in the powerful healing nature of blood originated thousands of years ago, during Etruscan times, but was more popularly noted during Roman times, when people would drink the blood of fallen gladiators. Just like human fat, blood was thought best when taken from someone healthy, preferably young and strong. Who better fit that description than a strong fighter? As the gladiator died, sick people would go forth, and collect their blood. Once gladiatorial combat was prohibited, around 400 CE, executed criminals replaced them as a blood source. Common folk who attended executions would wait with their cups and bowls in hand, and rush forward to collect the blood that poured from just-executed criminals on the scaffold. Get it while it’s hot, right?
We Did That? Page 8