by Lara Norman
“I can’t hold her like this.” Hailey held up the arm covered in a cast.
Devon jumped in at the threat of tears. “I can help you, sweetie. You can cradle her in your good arm and let her rest in your lap. Okay, Lori?” He looked at his sister-in-law for permission, and she nodded.
Devon had to take the baby first to facilitate the transfer, and he felt a rush of love for the tiny blonde girl. If ever there was proof of complete innocence, that was it right there. Her eyes were closed and her head was mostly covered in down, but it seemed she took after her mother.
Blinking back tears, he kneeled in front of Hailey’s wheelchair and rested the baby on her lap. He hovered over the swaddled infant as Hailey looked down at her.
“Hi, baby Maisie. I’m your cousin.”
Don came into the room, and when Devon glanced up, he noticed Chloe was out in the hall. The door closed again, and Devon turned his attention back to Hailey and Maisie.
“I got you the biggest one I could find, Lori.”
Don produced a cup of coffee, and Lori sighed in delight. “Thanks, Dad.”
When his father came to stand next to him, Devon lifted Maisie into his arms once more. He just barely touched the tip of her nose with his lips and handed her back to Lori. “Congratulations.”
Lori gave him a sleepy smile. “Thanks.”
He saw how her countenance had changed. Her motivation was focused on her family, and he hoped it would relieve her of the unrelenting feelings of guilt.
“I told Chloe she could come in and meet Maisie, but she said she was just here to push Hailey’s wheelchair back to her room when you were done,” Don said to no one in particular.
“Oh, nonsense, I’ll bring her in.” Lydia went to the door and pulled it open, speaking quietly to Chloe before both women came back in the room. Chloe stayed near the door and waved before sticking her hands in her pockets.
“Grandpa, it was Chloe’s idea to bring me here. Isn’t that cool?” Hailey looked happily at Don, who smiled down at her.
“It’s very cool.”
Chloe blushed and shifted her feet.
“It was smart of her to think of it,” Lydia said in Chloe’s direction.
“I figured it would make her happy, and that’s an important part of healing,” Chloe said.
“Well, thanks, Chloe, because I was wondering if Devon would come if Hailey couldn't.” Caleb turned to his brother. “I would have been pretty devastated if you hadn’t come to meet Maisie.”
It was Devon’s turn to blush because that was almost what he had done. Not that he would never have visited Lori and Caleb to meet the baby, he just wouldn't have done it until Hailey was released from the hospital and able to get around without assistance. He realized it could have been a very long time, and he avoided his brother’s gaze. It would have been a horrible type of selfishness not to celebrate his brother’s firstborn when Caleb had been there for him through every high and every low.
Without a word, he pulled Caleb in for a hug and let his sibling engulf him in his strength. Guilt, his familiar friend, reminded him he wasn't worthy of the brother he’d been given.
“She’s beautiful, Caleb, and I’m so happy for you,” Devon said as he stepped out of Caleb’s embrace.
The affable grin on Caleb’s face proved all he needed from him was his sincerity. “Thanks, brother. I’m happy you're here.”
Devon was happy to be there, too, but it was a fleeting feeling. And as the temporary exhilaration passed, it left Devon drained and anxious. “Hailey, we should get you back to your room.”
She didn't complain, proof his suspicions were correct; she was tired. He unlocked the wheels on her chair and rolled her toward the door, stopping to let everyone say their goodbyes.
“We’ll be there soon,” Don said as Devon let Chloe take over with the wheelchair so he could hug his parents.
“Okay, Dad.”
He wondered why they were coming to Hailey’s room when they had so much else going on. They’d seen her already, so why would they need to visit? Would they lecture him on something he’d done wrong? Would they try to insist he go home when he wasn't ready? Would they tell him he couldn't stay with them while he house hunted and Hailey healed?
Those nagging thoughts consumed him so much he didn't realize Chloe was speaking to him. “I’m sorry, what?”
“I asked if you were doing okay after everything.” She only made eye contact briefly before looking back down at the top of Hailey’s head.
“I guess the honest answer is not really.”
“Have you given any more thought to my suggestion of therapy?”
He breathed in and out carefully, trying not to blow up at her. “I don't need someone to tell me I’m messed up, but thanks.”
“That’s really not their purpose. I can see you’re going through so much with anxiety and maybe depression, and it won’t go away without working on it.”
Her voice might have been gentle and non-accusatory, but when the elevator reached their floor, he gave a look that said she’d pushed too far.
As soon as Chloe had Hailey out in the hallway, Devon took over pushing her chair and ignored Chloe. Sighing, she followed along behind him to see them settled. Once she had Hailey propped up with pillows under her pressure points and made sure she had ice water, she turned to Devon.
“Look, I know it’s not my place, and I apologize because I apparently upset you. I can’t help but want what’s best for Hailey, which includes her only parent being mentally healthy. I won’t bring it up again, but please, actually think about what I said instead of dismissing it out of hand.”
Devon stared after her as she left the room, then sank down in the chair next to Hailey, who was already drifting off to sleep. He kissed her temple and brushed her hair off her face. Since he was completely alone, he gave in to the overwhelming pressure weighing down on him, pressing his face into his hands and crying.
Chapter Fourteen
The day he both dreaded and anticipated arrived. The hospital had discharged Hailey, and Devon would once again be responsible for her well-being. It terrified him. He was positive he didn't have what it took to be strong for her, to guide her in the right direction. He didn't know up from down, but he was supposed to teach her? The one good thing was his parents had reiterated he and Hailey were welcome to stay with them indefinitely. They understood he would be too busy to look for a new house right away, and they knew he would need help to watch over Hailey and getting her to and from her appointments. He shouldn't have been so concerned about their talk after Maisie's birth, but that was how his mind worked now. Always on the defensive.
Hailey couldn't walk unassisted, so Devon carried her from the wheelchair at the hospital entrance to his father's waiting car. She had an appointment in the morning for her first physical therapy session where they would give Devon pointers on how to assist her in mobility and give Hailey a lightweight wheelchair while she worked on regaining her strength and waiting for her hip to mend. Devon planned to go back to work after that, at least for a few hours. They’d left the business stranded with Caleb on paternity leave and Vince in jail. Devon would need to train Olivia on the front desk a few hours every day and try to catch up on everything that had fallen to the wayside.
After dinner, he managed to bathe Hailey and get her into bed without any injury or water on her cast. As he tucked her in, he thought maybe, just maybe, he could finally take a deep breath. She was safe; they were in the same house and they would be okay. He headed downstairs to find his father, discovering him at his desk in the office.
"Dad?"
Don looked up as Devon paused in the doorway. "Yeah?"
He couldn't seem to form the words, clearing his throat and shifting his feet instead. "Well, I just wanted to tell you, you know, to say thanks."
Don rose from his seat and crossed the room to his son. "You've already thanked me, many times."
Tears pricked his eyelids as he
looked into his father's compassionate face. Don was constant, steady, dependable. Devon was grateful to have such a wonderful man on his side. "Yeah, I know. It's more than that. I don't really have the words, I guess."
“I don’t need words.” Don pulled Devon into a hug and they simply stayed there while the clock on the shelf ticked off the passing seconds.
When he stepped back, Devon wiped his face.
"Do you need help tomorrow? I can drive you both to the appointment. Don't forget, I agreed to babysit Hailey tomorrow while you go to work."
"I'd like that, thanks."
"Why don't you get some sleep?"
Devon glanced at the clock and didn't even grimace at the early hour. Sleep would be a blessing. "Okay."
For once, his night was blissfully free of nightmares, leaving him feeling refreshed when he woke up the next morning. He could almost feel normalcy creeping up on him once again, and it put him in a good mood. When he woke Hailey, he was humming a tune.
"Hailey bug," he sang. He sat on the edge of the bed and tickled her sides until she squirmed and laughed at him.
"Daddy, stop!" she squealed.
"Only if you give me my hug!"
Hailey shifted, needing his assistance until she sat a little crookedly on her good hip, throwing her arms around his neck and squeezing him tightly.
"Much better."
He picked her up and carried her to the bathroom before they made their way to the kitchen. Lydia had already left for the day, but Don was there making pancakes. They had a loud meal together as Hailey talked nonstop to Don about what she hoped would happen in physical therapy. Devon’s smile was huge by the time he took her upstairs to get her dressed.
It was a slight struggle to remove her hip brace and get her dressed over her arm cast without hurting her, but they managed. He got her strapped back in without too much wincing on her part, though he ground his teeth to keep the curses inside. He hated that he was hurting her, even if he couldn't help it.
Don drove them to the medical center and stayed in the front waiting room while Devon went to the pediatric therapy offices at the back. He signed in one-handed while holding Hailey on his opposite side, thinking about how much he was looking forward to bringing her new wheelchair home.
The appointment went well, and Hailey and Devon both liked the therapist assigned to her. She would go three times a week for the time being, and Devon had a list of exercises he had to do with Hailey at home. He wheeled her out to Don, and she chattered the whole way.
"Daddy, do you think Grandpa will like my wheelchair?"
"Yes, I do."
"It's neat, isn't it, Daddy? I like it."
Don stood near the doors as they approached, and he let Hailey lean over and push the big square button to open them automatically. She giggled when he swept his arm out in a grand gesture. Devon felt the smaller fissures in his heart stitch back together as his daughter laughed freely at her grandpa's antics.
Don dropped him off at the shop, and the anxiety came rushing back. Hailey would be apart from him for hours. He had to trust her well-being to someone else. He knew Don would never harm her, but he'd thought the same thing about Vince once upon a time. What little Hailey had told him about what she remembered came flooding back to him.
"I only went outside because Aunt Lori was busy on the phone and I couldn't ask her to take me to watch the squirrels. I could see them through the window running after each other and being silly. I only meant to be out there for a minute."
"How did you end up in Uncle Vince's truck?"
She'd shrugged. "I don't remember, but I woke up for a minute while he was driving. I watched the sky and fell back asleep."
Devon's cell phone rang as he was flipping on the lights, snapping him out of the rage-inducing memory.
"Yeah?"
"McMillan, it's Sergeant Hurley."
"How's it going?" Devon booted up the computer and watched the circle spin on the monitor.
"I want you to know Buckley was granted bail at his hearing and posted same an hour ago. If you see him, you need to turn around and walk in the other direction. If he attempts to speak to you, do not engage with him. I don't want to have to arrest you."
The rushing sound returned in his head. He put his phone on speaker and laid it down, resting his head in his hands and his elbows on the counter. "Why?"
"Why, what?" John responded.
"Why was he allowed to walk free?"
"He isn't free. He has to attend his court hearings, and he's not allowed to leave Merrimac. He wanted it expanded to Chatsworth County, but the way he acted after the crime weighed against him. The judge granted bail because he's a pillar of the community and not considered a flight risk."
Devon couldn't help thinking the only reason Vince was a 'pillar of the community' was because of his association with the McMillans. "He better stay away from me, my family, and the shop, John."
"I understand. You can call me if he comes there, but unless he makes a nuisance of himself, you don't have any reason for a restraining order." John sighed. "Can you come to the station this afternoon? I have his official statement, and I know you're interested in what happened."
Devon's temples throbbed as he stared at a chip in the Formica. "I might be able to. Hailey is with my father, and I'm working for a few hours. I don't have my car, though."
"Tell you what, I'll come down to the shop at four. Does that work for you?"
Devon straightened and picked up his cell, looking at the time. "Yeah, that'll be fine."
"Okay, I'll see you then. Remember what I said, yeah?"
Devon ended the call and stared out the bank of windows along the front of his shop. A compact car in a bold blue pulled up, and he watched a petite girl with jet-black hair jump out. She wore jeans and a hooded sweatshirt under an unzipped coat, hesitating outside the door and smoothing her hair down before pulling it open.
"Olivia?" he asked.
She offered him a bright smile and a nod. "Mr. McMillan?"
He gestured for her to join him behind the counter. "Please, call me Devon. Lori said you're familiar with our website, but I'll show you how to handle it behind the scenes. You'll answer the phone and use our scheduling software to mark down the names of the clients and what they request, as well as the timeline you've quoted them. I have a timeline cheat sheet here." He set the piece of paper on the counter.
"Okay. You're going to show me the website today?" As she spoke, she looked up at him. She was much shorter than him, and clearly young. He felt old next to her.
"You're sticking around for two hours, right?"
"Yeah."
"Then we'll spend as much time as you need before moving on."
Once they started Olivia's training, it made Devon happy to discover she learned quickly. She wouldn't need to do too much to the website while Lori was out on leave, but there were some things he liked to make sure were kept up-to-date. When he noticed a car come into the lot, he almost didn't pay attention to it. People dropped by with gifts even then, but it wasn't a stranger with a box of donuts who stepped out of the driver side.
It was Vince.
"Olivia, I need you to step into the office and close the door. Call the number on this business card and tell John Hurley that Vince Buckley is on my property." When she stared blankly at him, he opened the door to the private office and gave her shoulder a nudge. "Go now, Olivia. Make the call."
As Vince came closer, Devon noticed he sported a healing cut over one eyebrow and some sort of bandage over his nose. Devon began contemplating a weapons permit as the traitorous bastard opened the shop door. "I have to give you credit, Vince; it takes a lot of balls to show your face here."
Vince stopped just inside the door. "I need to talk to you."
"I have nothing to say."
"Then just listen. I need your help."
Devon laughed in complete disbelief. "You are joking, aren't you?"
Vince held his hands u
p in supplication. "I'm not. Look, it was an accident. I need you to tell the cops it was an accident. I can't go to prison."
"You can and you should. It's time for you to leave."
"Anna's pregnant. I need to be with her and the baby." His tone turned wheedling, and Devon hated him all the more. "You can convince the district attorney to give me probation."
"I'm sorry to hear your wife will raise a baby alone, but that's exactly what you deserve. You deserve to be separated from your child, to know what it feels like. Of course, it's not the same since you'll know where your child is. You won't wonder if she's dead only to find out your best friend knew she was in a fucking well the entire time because he put her there!"
Vince flinched at the venom in Devon's voice. "I panicked."
"And then?"
Vince frowned. "What do you mean?"
"So you panicked. And then what? What's your excuse for the days and nights you let me suffer? What's your excuse for leaving her out there to rot? For helping us look when you were the one person who knew exactly where the fuck she was!" Impatient with it all, Devon shook his head. "Get the fuck out, or I'll physically throw you out."
"You have to help me! You've already cost me my job, the least you can do is let me be there for Anna!" Vince advanced toward the counter, the only thing separating him from his oldest friend.
Fed up, Devon roared, "Were you always this psychotic and I just never realized it? Get the fuck out!"
But Vince didn't get out. He launched himself around the end of the counter and charged at Devon. "I owe you a broken nose, asshole!"
Devon heard Olivia let out a short scream. She’d left the office door open a crack and recorded the scene with her cell phone. Just as Vince drew close, Devon remembered to plant his feet and brace himself. Upon impact, they stumbled a few steps, but didn't fall. Devon threw the first punch, and a familiar red wash came over his vision as he pounded into Vince.
"All right, stop!"
He registered the voice of the sergeant, but it wasn't until strong arms wrapped around his chest and hauled him up that he quit swinging.